Please learn some asl

#1
I'm having a bit of a problem right now.

I live with my hearing wife, R, and my hearing partner, M. Right now communication is sometimes difficult, as what I pick up goes in and out throughout the day and is deteriorating as the years go on.

I want them to learn some ASL, but I don't know how to go about asking them to do so. I need this for my romantic relationships, especially the people I live with.
 

Mieke

Belgian ASL noob
#2
Try explaining them how much effort all communication you have together now takes from you, and explain with them learning ASL, you can share that effort in communicating... If you would like another hearie to try and talk sense into them, always willing to :)
 
#8
I'm having a bit of a problem right now.

I live with my hearing wife, R, and my hearing partner, M. Right now communication is sometimes difficult, as what I pick up goes in and out throughout the day and is deteriorating as the years go on.

I want them to learn some ASL, but I don't know how to go about asking them to do so. I need this for my romantic relationships, especially the people I live with.
Tell them what you said that you need this.
 
#9
I am not deaf, but I chose to learn sign language because I want to eventually work with children who have autism as an Occupational Therapist, and I want to include ASL in my lessons and therapy, especially because many children with autism are non-verbal. As a hearing person, if I had started a romantic relationship with a person who was losing their hearing, I would try to start learning to sign. Communication is huge in relationships and I don't think you should be afraid to ask you, especially if communication is important to you and you enjoy communicating with your wife and partner. If they care, I think they would understand.
 

Steel X

Well-Known Member
#10
Well, if they do know that you are not hearing well, then they should know it's already time to learn some ASL rather than writing stuff on paper or phones all the time. Learn the signs from the sign language dictionary online, take signing classes, etc...anything. It wouldn't hurt to practice. If they have that much patience with you on anything, then they have the patience to learn signing as well.
 

Lysander

Active Member
#12
I am a big advocate for, if you want/need something, you are responsible for asking for it. You can't hold someone else accountable for action or non-action if you haven't told them you need it.

So your first step is to sit down with your wife and partner and tell them that you need this from them. Have an honest discussion about what's happening with you and your hearing and tell them is reached a point that communication has become to difficult without the sign language. Make sure you get promises to learn from both of them.

Then keep on them about it. Give them information. Advise them of classes and resources. Set aside time to practice.

If they refuse, or don't follow through on their promises, then it might be time to look for new people to form better relationships with.
 
#13
My hearing has been slowly deteriorating over the years. My wife I met several years ago, when my hearing was not this bad, and I met my partner online.
I met my husband at a similar point in my hearing loss. Communication was pretty easy. Now way difficult and he is, by personality, unable to make it easier. Well, he tries a little. I would just ask them outright. try it at a time you are ready to burst into tears with the frustration.
 
#14
I met my husband at a similar point in my hearing loss. Communication was pretty easy. Now way difficult and he is, by personality, unable to make it easier. Well, he tries a little. I would just ask them outright. try it at a time you are ready to burst into tears with the frustration.
This is more like blackmailing or manipulative, when you decided to be in an open relationship you did not mince your words and your openness helped everyone to agree /accept the arrangement. The same thing applies now. If you know ASL offer to teach them, find where they can learn and give them the information... if they refuse , perhaps They are being passive aggressive about something, or perhaps is time to start looking into the whole situation and eventually move on.
 
#15
This is more like blackmailing or manipulative, when you decided to be in an open relationship you did not mince your words and your openness helped everyone to agree /accept the arrangement. The same thing applies now. If you know ASL offer to teach them, find where they can learn and give them the information... if they refuse , perhaps They are being passive aggressive about something, or perhaps is time to start looking into the whole situation and eventually move on.
Two ways to see that- showing your emotions can be an act of manipulation, but it can also be a way to communicate full information. Assuming it is manipulative can leave you poorly informed.
 

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