National Coming Out Day

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
Was yesterday, but I thought I would start a thread anyway.
In honor of National Coming Out Day, here is my coming-out story, which I don't believe I've ever posted here before.
I remember as a young teen I had no clue that I liked girls. I totally thought I was straight. I had guy crushes, on boys.
Then when I was fifteen, I fell in love with my best friend at an all girls camp. At the time I thought that I just really liked her as a best friend. Then the last Sunday of third session, she got some sort of special award. I went up to her to give her a hug. She gave me a HUGE wet sloppy kiss on the cheek. I remember thinking "OMG that feels amazing! OMG I'm in love with a GIRL?!?!?!" Freaked me out to put it mildly.
I remember the first time I had a fanasty about lesbian sex....Just a few months before, I'd had no clue how two women did it together.
I never told my crush that I had feelings for her. We just were best friends.
Although I do remember the next year, one of my counselors was all " You love her don't you?" I remember standing there, in the cabin and thinking "is it that obvious?"
I was very confused that summer. I can still remember lying in my bunk at camp thinking " I'm in love with a GIRL?!?!?"
I'm not sure if anyone else there knew that I was attracted to women. Ironicly I have found out that there was a lesbian couple who worked there, and a few of my friends from there turned out to be either lesbian or bi.
High school sucked socially for me. Didn't date then. In college, I dated some......I think most of my friends figured I was just a straight girl. Then my third semester I got assigned to a dorm where two of the RAs were lesbian. I actually became friends with a whole bunch of campus lesbians.
Oh dude. *starts to laugh* It seemed like the entire softball team had a thing for me. Just laughing remembering those days.
My last year at college, the Dani incident basicly busted down the closet door. Found out that a lot of my friends knew I wasn't exactly straight. I was still kind of in the closet since my college was a working class Yah Dude college.
I have recently come out to my uncle and my sister. I'm still not out to my parents. Every single time my mom goes " we need to find you a husband or a boyfriend and have a wedding!" I'm always internally replying " Well since I'm a lesbian leaning bisexual chick with no luck with realtionships, I doubt that's going to happen any time soon" I do think my parents suspect something.......it just hasn't been confirmed.
A lot of my friends told me that they knew I was bi.
What's YOUR story?
 

lsfoster

New Member
Sure, I'll play. :) I came out in high school, junior year. Same type of thing (most of them are, I guess). I had no idea, always had crushes on and dated guys, and then started to notice I was feeling a little "differently" towards one of my best friends. :shock: I'm a sucker for pretty girls with no self-esteem, I guess. :lol: Except I stopped wanting to just tell her that she was beautiful and amazing, and started wanting to show her, if that makes any sense. Anyways, so I finally realized what was going on, and told her, and helped set her up with this total douche at school. (Well she was straight, what was I gonna do?)

Anyways, a few months later, I met my first gf at a softball game (go figure, haha). We started dating like a week later, just in time for junior prom. I told my parents, who were kind of freaked out at first, but they're totally fine with it now, and love my current girlfriend (and hopefully soon-to-be fiancee).

I love how something like that totally blindsided me, even though basically none of my friends were surprised. Looking back, though, it all makes sense, so they were probably right. :giggle:

Anyone else? :wave:
 

Hwy99

New Member
Me 2 ;)

When I was 16 years old, my very first time I ever admitted to my friend was my best friend Jake. I remember I went to his house and I asked him if he want a ride to someplace to eat so we got in the car, I was driving. Somehow I feel like I have to tell him this time, I felt it's right time for me to tell him so I told him that I have something to tell him that he might don't like, he ask me if it was about my family, my friends, my life, etc. and I told him no it's just my personality, he look down and say "I knew it" and then he asked me if I like men? I was like um yes... He scoffs and ask me why I like men, I told him that they just attracted me and after that, we still are best friend and doing same thing as normally.

After that, mostly when I admitted to most of people, they told me that they already knew that I was gay. I guess they knew me pretty well and doesn't have to make big deal of it :)
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
I love how something like that totally blindsided me, even though basically none of my friends were surprised.
Ditto! I so clearly remember lying in my bunk at camp thinking " OMG I'm love with a girl? I was so freaking scared and confused. I was so surprised that I was having those feelings for a girl. None of my friends seemed to be all that surprised that I liked girls.....I guess its b/c I've always been a huge tomboy type.
 

KarissaMann05

Active Member
Premium Member
it is very and really nice to read some experienced stories you guys. I still believe there is no reason to hide who you truly are, just be yourself. :)
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
Karissa, I grew up in a very....well the suburb I grew up in wasn't that welcoming to people who were "diffferent" Heck it took me YEARS to come to terms with the fact that I'm deaf!
 

lsfoster

New Member
I would love to be more open about being bi. It is so hard thou :(
I can't imagine not telling my parents. Right now we're dealing with a lot of problems with my gf's parents (basically them not having any idea what they're talking about... ever :roll:) but it must be so hard to have to hide it from them. Do you know how they would react? Has the topic ever come up at all in, like, a general way?
 

KarissaMann05

Active Member
Premium Member
Karissa, I grew up in a very....well the suburb I grew up in wasn't that welcoming to people who were "diffferent" Heck it took me YEARS to come to terms with the fact that I'm deaf!
Yes, I remembered some bitter and sad experienced stories from a several friends of mine, espeically Puyo. It made me so sad that is not so easy for them... I feel people should tolerance toward GBLT community more, they also should welcome them..
 

Mizzou

New Member
Actually, I didnt bother my parents about being coming out because they are strict family. My gf 's parents are wonderful people to meet.
 

BradB08

New Member
I would love to be more open about being bi. It is so hard thou :(
I don't understand why it would be hard to be open about being bi?

My friend who is gay says that people who are bi are in a transition phase between straight and gay. I disagree. I think it's possible for a person to be sexually attracted to both genders.

We invent these labels (straight, gay and bisexual) because humans have a need to paint themselves into a corner or they need a convenient identity.
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
Well this past weekend, I came out to more people at my college's homecoming. I also just found out that my cabin mate from '95 now is a hardcore lesbian! I think there must have been something in the water there...LOL.
I think part of not being officailly out to my parents is that it's taken me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I'm bi. If I ever get a girlfriend, I will tell them.
 

SFShawn13

New Member
I don't understand why it would be hard to be open about being bi?

My friend who is gay says that people who are bi are in a transition phase between straight and gay. I disagree. I think it's possible for a person to be sexually attracted to both genders.

We invent these labels (straight, gay and bisexual) because humans have a need to paint themselves into a corner or they need a convenient identity.
Bisexual people get a lot of shit from the gay community, it sucks.
 

SFShawn13

New Member
I'll play too (yay procrastination). I was raised LDS (mormon), hella religious family. I'm the youngest of 7 kids - 5 older brothers, 1 older sister.

Came out when I was 14 years old and was sent to Love in Action to be "turned" straight or encouraged to live a celibate life. Yeah, fuck that! While I was at the camp 8 GLBT teens killed themselves. I've made it my personal goal to bring down those camps. ANYWAYS. When I got back from camp *still gay, durrr* my parents kicked me out. I lived with friends, homeless shelters for teens, etc. Then when I turned 15 I met Bryan who was 19 (yeah, I know!). I moved with him to San Francisco and we went out for three years.

I reconciled with my parents (still working on dad), graduated high school, and got a scholorship for gay kids who were kicked out. So I'm getting an awesome education at UC Berkeley for free :P

Because my own coming out experience was traumatizing (I <3 my therapist) I am hypersensitive about GLBT issues but not victim minded. I'm proud of myself for overcoming that bullshit, and would like to help other GLBT youth.
 
Last edited:

Byrdie714

New Member
I'll play too (yay procrastination). I was raised LDS (mormon), hella religious family. I'm the youngest of 7 kids - 5 older brothers, 1 older sister.

Came out when I was 14 years old and was sent to Love in Action to be "turned" straight or encouraged to live a celibate life. Yeah, fuck that! While I was at the camp 8 GLBT teens killed themselves. I've made it my personal goal to bring down those camps. ANYWAYS. When I got back from camp *still gay, durrr* my parents kicked me out. I lived with friends, homeless shelters for teens, etc. Then when I turned 15 I met Bryan who was 19 (yeah, I know!). I moved with him to San Francisco and we went out for three years.

I reconciled with my parents (still working on dad), graduated high school, and got a scholorship for gay kids who were kicked out. So I'm getting an awesome education at UC Berkeley for free :P

Because my own coming out experience was traumatizing (I <3 my therapist) I am hypersensitive about GLBT issues but not victim minded. I'm proud of myself for overcoming that bullshit, and would like to help other GLBT youth.
Good for you for turning a negative situation into a positive one. Sorry that you had to endure what you had to endure.

What ar eyou going to major in at UC Berk?
 

Hwy99

New Member
Yes, I remembered some bitter and sad experienced stories from a several friends of mine, espeically Puyo. It made me so sad that is not so easy for them... I feel people should tolerance toward GBLT community more, they also should welcome them..
Ohh I didn't notice that you mentioned my name lol, yeah in some way it might not easy to be that open with everyone. If they find it problem, I tend to consider it their problem, not mine ;)
 
Top