I found this site doing some research so hear it goes. My girlfriend had a tbi (traumatic brain injury) in may 2012. She was left profoundly deaf in both ears. Over the past 6 months she has experienced extreme highs and lows. I want to help her but she is the most independent person I have ever met. My help sometimes elicits a fight on some level. She told me she has found people to communicate with and shehas been in a great mood for the past two or three days. The hard part is that we just found out we are having a baby and I think she will be an awesome mother. She has doubts because of her deafness. I hate to see someone who once loved life the way she did be so sad. She is my world and then some. Tonight she is out for a bit which leaves me to do some research. Yesterday I bought her a baby monitor that lights and vibrates. A good start?
My girlfriend lows and highs
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dereksbicycles
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What is she doing out tonight without you? I did date someone who had TBI back in 2002 or 2003. I wish you the best luck.
She is out with her friends. They are seeing the new Twilight and I thought it would be good for her. I am really here to make sure I know everything I should know about being the best boyfriend I can for her. I know a lot about her injury because I am PA but I am an orthopedic pa. This is new ground.
Lau2046
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Being with friends is a good move and it's probably what she needs most. She's going through something very difficult and I'd recommend counseling for the both of you. I'd also suggest taking classes for ASL, if you haven't already started. Hearing has nothing to do with being a good parent, and I'm sure counseling with help address this...she's just feeling overwhelmed right now. Her world has changed overnight and she's expected to be all over the place with her moods. Good job with the baby monitor BTW, you might also want to look into a Sonic Boom alarm and other accessories around the home: fire alarms, door alert, etc. Maybe a hearing dog will lift her spirits and help ease her into the adjustment. Does she like dogs? I'd advise you to sit down with a local audiologist. They can provide guidance on items that can help give her back some of her independence...
Laura
Laura
Thnx for the quick reply. She had sat down with an audiologist a few weeks after the accident. She took the lit he gave her and I'm not sure where it is. We just moved into our own home so I have been looking into some changes that I am goings to make. The phone is first order of business because that bugs her to no end. She doesn't A. She can't hear it ring. B. Even if she could she can't answer it. I have been looking into a TTY device that I am going to get for the house. I had seen the alarm clock and was thinking Xmas present but I am thinking that I am going to stay away from the adaptive technology for Xmas and just get it. Bs he LOVES dogs. I didn't even think of that. Hmmmmmmmmm maybe I will look into that tonight and tomorrow. I got her beats headphones cuz she loves music. When she turns them all the way up she can feel the beat of the music. So I think I'm on a good track. One thing that has come up is she wants to turn her voice off. She has this high pitchy adorable voice that has changed moderately in the last month or so but I don't think that will help her but I'm not her so I don't know. I have also thought bout the baby and the look on a baby's face when it hears its mom for the first time. I don't want her to miss any more experiences than she already will. I don't want to watch her heart get broken again.
Thnx for the quick reply. She had sat down with an audiologist a few weeks after the accident. She took the lit he gave her and I'm not sure where it is. We just moved into our own home so I have been looking into some changes that I am goings to make. The phone is first order of business because that bugs her to no end. She doesn't A. She can't hear it ring. B. Even if she could she can't answer it. I have been looking into a TTY device that I am going to get for the house. I had seen the alarm clock and was thinking Xmas present but I am thinking that I am going to stay away from the adaptive technology for Xmas and just get it. Bs he LOVES dogs. I didn't even think of that. Hmmmmmmmmm maybe I will look into that tonight and tomorrow. I got her beats headphones cuz she loves music. When she turns them all the way up she can feel the beat of the music. So I think I'm on a good track. One thing that has come up is she wants to turn her voice off. She has this high pitchy adorable voice that has changed moderately in the last month or so but I don't think that will help her but I'm not her so I don't know. I have also thought bout the baby and the look on a baby's face when it hears its mom for the first time. I don't want her to miss any more experiences than she already will. I don't want to watch her heart get broken again.
How does she communicate? Since her injurybwas recent I doubt she is using asl. Having the baby together makes you a bit more than a friend. But I feel you will have to give heme. Let her come to grir tips with her deafness and support her by offering to learn asl together. Were there other side effects from the tbi besides deafness?
neworld524
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Thanx everyone. This has been great. I have been doing a lot of research and found some great stuff. I know it is a slow process. When the accident first happened she had memory loss that she retrieved and some paralysis again that she recovered from. The only perm injury was to her hearing. Something I am having trouble supporting is her wanting to stop speaking. I mean if it will help her then I will support her. Right now she speaks and lip reads. She had always veen a proficient lip reader. It was a skill she developed while she was hearing. She is taking ASL classes and we are about to start an intense 4 night a week program.
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Weird, neworld524.
You initially introduced yourself as the person with TBI. Now it looks like you have made two accounts, gotten confused and posted as the other poster...I will make a guess that you are one of the fakers looking for attention.
neworld524
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Or here is an idea I was using the home computer and so was he. He used the back button and I had never logged out. Thank for being so supportive. If I was looking for attention I just would have made myself twice not created a bf. I don't do the whole attention. Thing I hate attention. Whatever believe what you need I don't have to prove myself.
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Unlikely. Reported you.
Lau2046
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I prefer to be kind rather than constantly looking for trolls.
Neworld, just a last bit of advice, stay positive and remember many things she's going through are temporary, and likely decisions made in the heat of the moment - possibly random at that. She probably has several things going on in her head and will likely change her mind several times before she knows what she wants to do. Just stay supportive, say nothing, and give her space. Again, you both sound like you'd benefit from counseling. Best wishes.
Laura