Is There A Good Way To Respond As A Hearing Person When Someone Tells You They Are D/deaf?

DeafNerdMommy said:
That is crazy but I can that being considered rude.
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The thing that was very really wild about this student was she stole everyone money and hid it in her coating lining ! Now that really rude! My roommate got a full length leather coat for a Christmas gift and brought it back to school and the exchange student stole my roommate coat and mailed it to someone ! She was talking to me and I thought it would had been ruder to keep asking her to repeat herself. I really thought she wasn't the best person to be a exchange student b/c she
didn't seem to like American stealing all the girls wallets , stamps etc .
 
I am particularly fond of the following phrase when someone realizes I'm Deaf:

"BADASS! Next beer's on me!"
 
Dismal Shadow said:
I am sorry, NOT SORRY. It's a funny video but in all seriousness, there are better approaches.
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ROFL

I agree on better approaches, but what's significant is the comfort with her identity that is very clear in this video. It wasn't always that way for us. I'm happy to see progress on that.
 
Dismal Shadow said:
I am sorry, NOT SORRY. It's a funny video but in all seriousness, there are better approaches.
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OMG! When I first moved to my condo I was outside putting bread out for the birds and a trustee can over to me and started to me not to put bread out he was talking normal then he saw my left hearing aid and his face went " No OH she deaf then he saw my right hearing aid and I knew what was going to come next !
He started talking to me in a monotone voice and speaking v e r y s lo w l y about not feeding the birds b/c there a lot of animals around . Then he
said D O Y OU U ND ER S T AN D M E ? I wanted to say Yes I do and I know an universal sign language that I am sure you'll know and give the finger !
He thought I was really slow and not bright but I had the last laugh ! We both filed an abatement b/c we felt our taxes were too high . I got mine and saw the guy outside and asked if he got his taxes reduce and he said "NO" I told him I got mine and his face almost hit the ground ! The guy was a realtor and told me he would be getting his taxes reduce ! I loved it ! I just walked away leaving the jerk with his mouth on the ground ! LOL !
 
whatdidyousay! said:
OMG! When I first moved to my condo I was outside putting bread out for the birds and a trustee can over to me and started to me not to put bread out he was talking normal then he saw my left hearing aid and his face went " No OH she deaf then he saw my right hearing aid and I knew what was going to come next !
He started talking to me in a monotone voice and speaking v e r y s lo w l y about not feeding the birds b/c there a lot of animals around . Then he
said D O Y OU U ND ER S T AN D M E ? I wanted to say Yes I do and I know an universal sign language that I am sure you'll know and give the finger !
He thought I was really slow and not bright but I had the last laugh ! We both filed an abatement b/c we felt our taxes were too high . I got mine and saw the guy outside and asked if he got his taxes reduce and he said "NO" I told him I got mine and his face almost hit the ground ! The guy was a realtor and told me he would be getting his taxes reduce ! I loved it ! I just walked away leaving the jerk with his mouth on the ground ! LOL !
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What did you actually tell him
 
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Anyway the other way around I'd love it if someone would sign slow to me and ask if I got it.
 
Mieke said:
What did you actually tell him
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I didn't waste my time with the fool ,I had just moved in and didn't want to start off on the wrong foot . I am very outspoken and I had my daughter to think of , I didn't want her to see me say anything wrong. He thought he was a big shot going to get this taxes reduce and that I wouldn't . This is really got to him that I got my taxes reduce and that was better than saying anything to him :) .
 
Mieke said:
Have you tried telling them what they can do when you say that you're hoh.

I imagine them slowing down their talking speed would help and taking in the call in a less noisy room? If possible of course
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Have you ever tried explaining to people......"I'm deaf, i can speech-read, but you need to face me, not cover your mouth, shave off your beard and moutache, don't mumble, but don't shout either, don't sit with the light (window) at your back, don't talk behind me, dont talk with head down, or your back to me, please don't chew gum either, quiet place, good lighting, I'm signing because I'M Deaf not you, and yes, I can speak well only after going through......(another long story explaining that blah blah blah) and for your benefit not mine".......every single day to every hearing person you want to have a decent conversation with, only to find, the next time you meet them, that they have forgotten all that or simply can't be bothered because you speak well anyway and 'that's a blessing right?' oh and last but not least.....'your'e not 100% stone-deaf so why do you voice-off and use sign language? Why not just speak?' .......Now who'd want that? - a former 'so-called' oral 'success' (me). Not on your life!

WITH SIGN LANGUAGE I AM EQUAL!
 
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Don't do this ! LOL!

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BecLak said:
Have you ever tried explaining to people......"I'm deaf, i can speech-read, but you need to face me, not cover your mouth, shave off your beard and moutache, don't mumble, but don't shout either, don't sit with the light (window) at your back, don't talk behind me, dont talk with head down, or your back to me, please don't chew gum either, quiet place, good lighting, I'm signing because I'M Deaf not you, and yes, I can speak well only after going through......(another long story explaining that blah blah blah) and for your benefit not mine".......every single day to every hearing person you want to have a decent conversation with, only to find, the next time you meet them, that they have forgotten all that or simply can't be bothered because you speak well anyway and 'that's a blessing right?' oh and last but not least.....'your'e not 100% stone-deaf so why do you voice-off and use sign language? Why not just speak?' .......Now who'd want that? - a former 'so-called' oral 'success' (me). Not on your life!

WITH SIGN LANGUAGE I AM EQUAL!
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I'm not saying we're not ignorant, my quote there was related to frustrations when on a phone.

We're all equal
 
Mieke said:
Anyway the other way around I'd love it if someone would sign slow to me and ask if I got it.
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I met a girl who was born deaf she was about 9 or 10 years old and been using all her life I still remember some ASL and the girl sign her name for me nice and slow
and I sign my name very slow and the girl was very sweet about. I better kids would be more willing to go slow than adults.
 
Mieke said:
I'm not saying we're not ignorant, my quote there was related to frustrations when on a phone.

We're all equal
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Having to explain youself everyday to each and every person, just so people can accomodate you is exhausting. With sign language there little to no explanation necessary. My post was related to the thread as well as your comment 'have you tried telling them what they could do...."

FYI, 'With Sign Language, I am Equal' is the WFD slogan for the International Week of the Deaf (which is this week)
 
BecLak said:
Having to explain youself everyday to each and every person, just so people can accomodate you is exhausting. With sign language there little to no explanation necessary. My post was related to the thread as well as your comment 'have you tried telling them what they could do...."

FYI, 'With Sign Language, I am Equal' is the WFD slogan for the International Week of the Deaf (which is this week)
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And how far do you get with sign language when the person you are trying to have a conversation with does not know sign language?
 
Jane B. said:
And how far do you get with sign language when the person you are trying to have a conversation with does not know sign language?
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1. It reverses the tables
2. Almost immediately, the other person realises they need to accomodate YOU.
3. Either they make the effort to understand what you are signing (which is not that hard really with a bit of effort) - hearing people do it all the time when travelling and don't know the spoken language, why would this be any different?
4. Or they find some way of meeting in the middle. (Text or pen and paper)
5. If they can't, then they are selfish snobs who are not worth your time of day. But tbh, there are more good people out there than people give credit.
 
It really depends on how much communication you are going to have with said person. You do get the two extremes of either shouting or speaking so slowly and exaggerated that it's unintelligible. A good response (for me) would be for them to say "Can I do anything different?" or similar without being condescending before you have to stop them and tell them again. Really depends on the person, as many other people have said.
 
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