Guess it's time for me to give up on dating women who can hear well

cdaigle430

cdaigle430

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:hmm: I don't know about anyone else here, but for 10 years now, since I lost most of my hearing, I found it almost impossible to date women who hear well. There is always an issue with communication between us and her children(if she has any), or her family. Yes I'm no Goerge Clooney, I'm more like George Castanza but I think I'm pretty a succesfull guy, I make a good living, I'm also educated and I think I have alot going for me but none of this is helping. Is there anyone in there 30s or 40s who is HOH and going through the same thing? How do you cope with it or how did you make things work? :confused:
 
It all boils down to dating the right woman... With compassion, understanding and love.

The woman you may be dating. If you do not mind me asking... How old are the kids? I can understand you dating a woman, with understanding. But can not be forced on older children. It is not the deafness itself. The deafness just gives older children excuses to deny you. Sad to say. It is hard on older children in general, to accept another man in their mother's life.

It is a difficult situation.

I am not saying that it is impossible. But just wondering, if that is one of the factors..
 
Babyblue said:
It all boils down to dating the right woman... With compassion, understanding and love.

The woman you may be dating. If you do not mind me asking... How old are the kids? I can understand you dating a woman, with understanding. But can not be forced on older children. It is not the deafness itself. The deafness just gives older children excuses to deny you. Sad to say. It is hard on older children in general, to accept another man in their mother's life.

It is a difficult situation.

I am not saying that it is impossible. But just wondering, if that is one of the factors..
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Thanks for the reply, usually the kids are in their teens and I understand that you can't get along with everyone all the time. I think I'm trying hard enough but I need to put forth more effort in the right place at the right times into the relationship. One way is to communicate better with the assetts I do have so my question to all of you is how can I make that happen?
 
Yeah, it does suck.

I have a few friends who go through the same thing.

They've dated hearing people, but the most common problem they go through is that their hearing significant other tends to forget that the deaf person is there and get too into the hearing world that the deaf person feels left out.
 
cdaigle430 said:
Thanks for the reply, usually the kids are in their teens and I understand that you can't get along with everyone all the time. I think I'm trying hard enough but I need to put forth more effort in the right place at the right times into the relationship. One way is to communicate better with the assetts I do have so my question to all of you is how can I make that happen?
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If you are dating. Then I can understand.

But if you are seeking a true relationship. Then you will need to seek someone with the compassion and understanding that you are who you are.

Deafness and all!

Understanding and compassion is a two way street. :)
 
Im female and have the same problem, I lost most of my hearing in my teens, I only dated hearing guys and eventually married one and had a daughter who is Deaf. Since my divorce Iv had many bad encounters and a couple of relationships with hearing guys. The problem being communication ie they dont sign or give any consideration to my hearing loss.I got left out of conversations with friends of his, basically ignored. I even had one who said he was embarrassed by my deaf accent he forbade me to wear my hearing aids when we were out in public. so its not just a man thing. I now only date deaf and hOH guys.
 
if you is not happy with this women,go found you another who is the same as you as deaf.
 
Im in the same boat. It really does limit your opportunities, doesnt it? No fun I can say that for sure but don't ever give up hope..........
 
I used to date a heariie guy and we basically chat still on yahoo messanger :P and how I can communicate? I can write down what I want to say or I can use my voice.. ugh I hate using my voice when I use my sign language blah oh well.. shit happens lol ;)
 
All go down to the personality of the girl. Some hearing girls are willing do anything to bridge the communications and other doesnt.
 
I have the same problem too. Although I am a woman with a young child, and not a lot going for me right now other than currently working on a Bachelor's degree in English Education.

Ive dated guys here and there but I feel really left out of conversations.
 
I'm just plain fed up with women, hearing and deaf. It's all good though. I'm going to take the advice of a friend and just mellow out. The women around here really don't know what they're missing out on and I'm more than content if it stays that way.

You're not the only one in this boat.
 
It's a challenge ... but, I just found that telling someone right off the bat that I was hearing impaired, wore hearing aid, blah blah blah was the key. My husband struggled with my hearing in the beginning and he admitted to having major frustration and lack of patience at times. Now we have adjusted and deal w/ the differences. So, bottom line, just be way up front with said potential. You will know really quickly whether they will have the compassion to deal with someone with hearing loss.
 
Thanks,
It's very tough finding the right person who will adjust to a hearing impaired or deaf person but they are out there. For me it has been very frustrating to find the middle point in dating The only manual that comes with the hearing aides are just for the instruments. They don't help you with socializing, friends and relationships. I guess thats something I need to find out on my own hopefuly, with a little help from my friends here at Alldeaf :)
 
I am married to a hearing guy...when I first met him, he didnt know ASL and he wanted to get in my pants. I told him that he had to learn ASL so by golly, he did and now he has my pants whenever he wants. :giggle:

I refuse to date a hearing guy who wont learn ASL. My ex hubby refused to learn..screw that! I need my communication needs met as well.
 
shel90 said:
I am married to a hearing guy...when I first met him, he didnt know ASL and he wanted to get in my pants. I told him that he had to learn ASL so by golly, he did and now he has my pants whenever he wants. :giggle:

I refuse to date a hearing guy who wont learn ASL. My ex hubby refused to learn..screw that! I need my communication needs met as well.
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:rofl: maybe I should try that tactic!
 
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