DO you need to work full time in a relationship?


Active Member
Have a full time job to impress your girlfriend or wife?

What if a guy worked part time and also made money on side? That guy happens to make more doing that than working full time and not on the side. What would you do if your girlfriend or wife told you, you see, I work full time scheduled hours every week. If I do that so should you? What is wrong with the picture? I mean if a guy is able to make money working part time and working on the side, is a guy required to work full time?


Ad Astra Per Aspera
Premium Member
Working, in my view, is there to pay for certain things.

My living expenses.

And paying for my retirement. (By saving and investing.)

And a few extra things.

A lot of people make this more complicated by using jobs as status symbols or hours-worked as status symbols. Sometimes, some people don't like that there are those who don't have to work as many hours to get the same pay. We also live in a very Puritan-influenced society that imagines that the main purpose to live is to grind off your nose working overtime from birth to death. I, of course, do not subscribe to that philosophy. :)

But I think that if you know what your financial goals are and you are meeting them with your work (part time or not), what's the problem?

Many women, in the dating arena, will use certain things as proxies. A bachelor's degree is a proxy for intelligence. A full-time job is a proxy for not being a lazy, homeless, pauper. A new car is a proxy for not being a cheap person who doesn't spend money. Etc...

This is made worse by the fact that many women are very conscious of status and rank. They don't want to date someone without a college degree if they have a degree. (They want you to be at their rank level.) They don't want you to not have a full-time job if they are working a full time job (same rank, please). And if you both work, but she's a manager, and you're a key puncher, that's also a problem for many women. (Not the same rank.)

(Of course, this is my observation, I could be wrong. But I do keep noticing this.)

Never mind that being a home business owner that works part-time hours (freeing up hours of your life for other stuff), making more money than you ever would working for someone else, shows a lot of intelligence and creativity, and the mental ability to figure out ways around what society says "is the one way to be in life."

You just have to bring them over to your point of view. Good luck. :)


bloody phreak from hell
I don't think working full-time or part-time really matters, as long as both are happy with each other and with what they do.

Maybe, one job isn't a happy job for one half... but he needs the job and the other half will still be supportive. That's what love it.

If one can't be happy or supportive of the other, then where's the love and the relationship?


Active Member
I have been working full-time and supporting a family for 25 years. My wife is still not impressed.........


Ad Astra Per Aspera
Premium Member
Why would anyone care as long as you earn enough money to live?
That's my opinion as well, but there's many people who care about how much one earns and what one can buy with it, and what exactly they can boast about to their family and friends. :roll:


Audist are not welcome
Premium Member
If my hubby worked part time and brought home a million dollars a year, I would be THRILLED. It would mean MORE money for us and MORE time with him at home with the family. It is a win-win situation!

Too bad, we arent in the lucky 1%


Active Member
Dude! I have to say, as a deaf guy in the dating game, to have a woman who works full time and is not being sought after by creditors is a VERY good thing. I'd hang on to her if I was you. Just sayin...

Having said that, it sounds like ya'll have some issues that have nothing to do with actual work. Again, just sayin...


Premium Member
My view maybe/somewhat differ... It's about something "Giving In Return", During my dating time, I was very cautious of who I date and what she is looking for. Of course I work full time and I make over 6 digits salary and it's an attractive package for women you know? She could decided not to work full time at all because she knew that I can cover everything without any problem. The problem is that if she doesn't work at all, and I have been 'giving" her comfort life style, she can buy clothes, shoes, and all what she want, and what do I get "in return" from her? If she buy something for me, but this come out of my money? Is that a reward of her hard earned money? No.. not at all.
My wife work full time, and she work hard, and she been saving money to buy something for me. The harder she saved, the more she love me. This is what I can see from her reward by "giving in return" because she know how much I support her. She motivated to save from her hard earned money. Once she gave me something...I'm sure she celebrate herself of how happy she did it and she want to give something in return. This is a true relationship of being happy with each other.

So, no matter how much each other makes, by ether working full time or part time, or how much they earned, but sharing each other, supporting each other and "Giving each other in return" will survive hardship lifestyle and at the end it's a rewarding work for them.


New Member
If he is making enough to support himself, contribute fairly to all expenses and treat his wife/girlfriend once in a while, I don't think part-time or full-time is an issue. But perhaps money is not the issue for the wife/gf ... maybe it is that she feels he is not being very productive in his off hours or is not equally driven towards the same long-term goals as she is.


Active Member
Two heads make the relationship work together (actually it worked in the marriage) and solve how to go about dating. If you want to go Dutch. Fine, talk with her about it. If you want to support her by taking her out and have a good time, you need to pay for her when going out to have a good time. Start saving enough money to take her out. Simple as that. If you don't have a car, then take the taxi or the bus to your destination.

As for having a full time job does impress her that you can manage your budget very well without going broke. If she sees that you are wasting your money too much, then that would turn her off. You need management on the budget to last a whole month and not go broke. That was not easy but have to figure out around it. Budget is the key.


Active Member
Relationship have right to know if he or she have full-time that either one can be collapse by lose job and support each other.