Deaf Law!

Discussion in 'Our World, Our Culture' started by Cousin Vinny, Jun 9, 2006.

  1. Cousin Vinny

    Cousin Vinny New Member

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    Thanks to the humorous beer commercials starring Burt Reynolds proclaimating 'Man Laws' left and right, how about a version for 'Deaf Law'? :deal:

    I'll start;

    Me: What do you know about those jokes about the 'TIMBER' fingerspelling and tree falling down?

    ADer's: Yeah, that joke is very common, the cockroach of all Deaf jokes.

    Me: 'Zactly! It's lame. Sure, it was funny, during the 1970's. Get on with the times!

    ADer's: We propose a law banning Deaf Timber Jokes and any creative variations thereof!

    Me: I second with enthusiasm.

    ADer's: (All raising hands in support.) Upplause ensues...

    Bummy: So, it is, the No Deaf Timber Joke is now inscribed as Deaf Law!
    :rofl:

    Anyone here care to contribute? ;)
     
  2. DeafSCUBA98

    DeafSCUBA98 Active Member

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  3. Cousin Vinny

    Cousin Vinny New Member

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    The delicious irony of it all is that if I had to explain it to you, I'd be in violation of the Deaf Law. :whistle:

    Unless you happen to refer to the Man Law & Burt Reynolds part. Well, go no further than this website:

    Man Laws Site

    Basically, society has their own set of 'unwritten rules' which govern the usual behavior among its participants. Men are like that, and Miller Lite came out with a humorous take on the whole thing, as far as going in replicating the Knights of the Round Table feel to it. (The guys are in a square table, creating super-secret Man Laws for the guys to follow.)

    Here's a recent commercial I saw about Man Laws;

    When toasting someone, do you clink your beer at the top, or at the bottom? :cheers:
     
  4. LuciaDisturbed

    LuciaDisturbed New Member

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    ???? *confused look*
     
  5. Cousin Vinny

    Cousin Vinny New Member

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    Here's another one, admittedly a lil bit 'risque' if you know your ASL. :Oops: (ADC = Average Deaf Community Joe SixPack) (10% = Ten Percenter)

    Me: Let's talk about a crucial issue, interrupting the natural flow of ASL communications all over the world, that of ABC handshapes being used in signs, hinting at their corresponding English equivalents.

    10%: Yeah! They basically 'insult' the dignity and grace of ASL!

    Stoner: Sweeeet! If you know the one-handed sign for 'insult', but use the 'I' handshape instead, that'll be funny!

    Me: As always, Stoner, I appreciate your, ahem, colorful viewpoint.

    ADC: Speaking of colors, what about signs associated with colors? You've gotta sign 'Yellow' with the 'Y' handshape, for example.

    10%: I carry a Home DepotĀ® swatch/keyring combo. Quite handy in pointing out colors, including difficult colors like 'burnt sienna' and 'berrylicious blue'. Use that instead!

    Stoner: Berries... Oooh! A new thought just came onto my head! Sign the 'Oral' sign with the 'O' handshape!

    Me: That's it. I'm gonna yank your bong away from ya!

    ADC: What about name signs? A lot of them have ABC handshapes in 'em, too!

    10%: You own your name; surely you can creatively come up with a new name sign? Oh- You'll needed to do so yesterday. We already named you, and it is not flattering. :whistle:

    Me: Well, I can think of a lot of exceptions to the ABC handshape rule as used in signs. I propose if the handshape sign doesn't pass the 'smell', ahem, 'visual' test, the other party must quickly correct or forever hold their peace.

    ADC: Second the 'visual' smell test Deaf Law!

    10%: Allright, I'll compromise. I just want my beer and nachos. Is it time now?

    Stoner: Dudes, where's my bong? I just had it a few minutes ago!

    10%: *leaping upon table* A ha! You used the 'B' handshape in describing 'bong'. No beer for you!

    ADC: Just curious; What is my new name sign?

    Me: *flicking lights* The nachos are ready. Go ahead and vote! *show of hands*

    Scribe: I now inscribe the Visual Smell Test for ABC Handshapes Deaf Law for all eternity! :deal:
     
  6. Cousin Vinny

    Cousin Vinny New Member

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    Here's another one; I'm sure all DHH people can relate to this one.

    Me: Ever since the advent of electricity, we have been bothered by this huge problem; Light flicking, especially when used in meetings, classes, Gally dorm rooms, and such.

    10%: Yeah! Sometimes, the lights flick too rapidly and give me a seizure fit or two! What is the matter with the person flicking the lights? Is he/she sadistic?!?

    ADC: On the other end, I hate those people who darken a whole room for a COUPLE seconds before turning on the lights. Such a big turn off!

    Me: I'll echo these sentiments. If I'm too busy conversing with a lady in a crowded Gally dorm room hosting a party, the last thing I need is a nitwit putting a kibosh on my ASL one-liners. :)

    ADC: Still, we need a way to get the attention of peeps in the room, somehow.

    10%: How about a buddy system? You have a buddy responsible for getting your attention fixtated upon a single source if necessary. An 'Attention Buddy' has a nice ring to it.

    Me: Sounds creepy, now you think about it. I'll touch you if you can touch me, so we all can pay attention. Even if it's all shoulder-tapping, I still don't think so.

    ADC: Yeah, what if a person caressed a shoulder instead! *brrrr!*

    10%: That one's scrapped. I nominate the 'Two Light Flicks Deaf Law'.

    Me: Seconded. Just so that those two light flicks are reasonably flexed in an extremely short duration. Three is too many, and one may not get all the attention.

    ADC: Two is the magic number, apparently. Got my vote.

    Scribe: I now hereinafter inscribe the Two Light Flicks Deaf Law into this dusty tome... Stoner, quit playing with the lights! :)
     
  7. LuciaDisturbed

    LuciaDisturbed New Member

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    I kind of got it...but not all of it. Have to think hard to understand it lol.
     
  8. LuciaDisturbed

    LuciaDisturbed New Member

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    I got this one, LOL.
     
  9. jazzy

    jazzy New Member

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    I got now lol, at first I was at loss.
     
  10. Cousin Vinny

    Cousin Vinny New Member

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    & Jazzy as well-

    Nice to know you both are finally warming up to my, ahem, unique blend of humor. Welcome aboard! :)
     

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