Anyone experienced loneliness and anxiety being hoh or deaf?

#21
My cousin visited this weekend. He is my favorite cousin and it has been 17 years since we last visited. My hearing is so much worse now but he made the effort to speak carefully and we talked and talked and talked. Great conversations about family, our marriages- lots of stuff. I think it made a big difference that he is someone with whom I have a deep, if occasional connection. It's like my ability to understand him is "keyed in" somehow.

Lovely time.
 
#23
I feel more isolated as time goes on. I am working on my ASL as its easier to talk with. When I'm with my friends they easily forget I'm HOH and then they forget to face me and talk, or we go to loud places. I usually just sit quietly and watch them all talk and just fade out.

I've actually noticed I get a bad headache when I try and strain to hear everyone. But my friends are hearing and don't know ASL, I wish I had people who signed that I could actually hangout with and sign with, even if its just on video chat.
 

zeefour

Active Member
#24
I feel more isolated as time goes on. I am working on my ASL as its easier to talk with. When I'm with my friends they easily forget I'm HOH and then they forget to face me and talk, or we go to loud places. I usually just sit quietly and watch them all talk and just fade out.

I've actually noticed I get a bad headache when I try and strain to hear everyone. But my friends are hearing and don't know ASL, I wish I had people who signed that I could actually hangout with and sign with, even if its just on video chat.
I get horrible headaches and it makes me cranky and frustrated. A professor who kicked me out of the program I was in because of "behavioral problems" didnt believe me when I mentioned that as one of the problems being HoH causes and thats what led to a few of my supposed inappropriate behaviors like closing my eyes and putting my head down in class. She said that I cant try to make excuses that my hearing impairment causes problems because its fixed by my wearing hearing aids. Plus she knows what hearing loss means and the only thing it does is not let me hear things, it cannot and does not affect my behavior. >.>
 

peekaboo

Well-Known Member
#25
Zeefour, you and I need to meet one day. I feel like I met my twin. You and I had the same plms. I went to elementary and the teachers thought I was just being a pain in the butt because of my HA... little did they know. I remember my 4th-grade teacher gave me hell because I couldn't keep up! She was the worse. I learn nothing from her and all the other teachers before and after her. And they said its all in my head. Yeahhhhhh right! Just because they can hear, dont mean they understand HOH. what a joke. If only I went to a DEAF school, I would have been sooo much better off. grrr I was totally alone in schools, even though I had deaf friends, I was the only one in all my classes. :(
 
#26
I get horrible headaches and it makes me cranky and frustrated. A professor who kicked me out of the program I was in because of "behavioral problems" didnt believe me when I mentioned that as one of the problems being HoH causes and thats what led to a few of my supposed inappropriate behaviors like closing my eyes and putting my head down in class. She said that I cant try to make excuses that my hearing impairment causes problems because its fixed by my wearing hearing aids. Plus she knows what hearing loss means and the only thing it does is not let me hear things, it cannot and does not affect my behavior. >.>
That is almost funny it is so tragic. My social behavior is completely different from when I could hear. And I do not even attempt lecture situations.
 

zeefour

Active Member
#27
Zeefour, you and I need to meet one day. I feel like I met my twin. You and I had the same plms. I went to elementary and the teachers thought I was just being a pain in the butt because of my HA... little did they know. I remember my 4th-grade teacher gave me hell because I couldn't keep up! She was the worse. I learn nothing from her and all the other teachers before and after her. And they said its all in my head. Yeahhhhhh right! Just because they can hear, dont mean they understand HOH. what a joke. If only I went to a DEAF school, I would have been sooo much better off. grrr I was totally alone in schools, even though I had deaf friends, I was the only one in all my classes. :(
OMG that sounds like this professor! When I was kicked out of the program she said I should maybe take classes outside a college because I "just don't fit in the academic environment." Um right yeah not to brag but I went to an Ivy on scholarship, then started law school on scholarship and have 2 bachelors from our state university Anyway there are a lot of times I wish I had gone to a Deaf school. I get my parents wanting me to stay at home especially with my dad's ohana's bad experienced with residential schools. But I wish so many times I was like 10 years younger and I could have gone to RMDS which is the new bilingual charter day school in the Denver area. It would have been perfect. But wishing won't take me back in time. I'm applying for Gally for grad school starting Fall 2019. It's just so hard to keep my ASL up at a more advanced level. I live in a place where there's no DHH. Gah,

PM me!
 
#28
I understand what it’s like to have the feelings of loneliness and isolation as well because of my deafness. Since I lost my hearing (I’m late deafened) I find that a lot of hearing people have the ability to hear but it doesn’t mean they actually listen. I’m always repeatedly asking them to face me when talking, not to put their hands near their mouths so I can read lips and it never fails so many of them keep turning away or move their head while talking to me. It’s like trying to follow a ping pong ball sometimes. Very exhausting.
 
#29
I lost my hearing a few years ago. When this first happened I isolated myself to my house. Just recently I've started to do something about it. I did go to the audiologist who referred me for cochlear implants. I didn't qualify for the cochlear because my ears are so messed up from meningitis. I am angry and depressed a lot. I do feel lonely. All my friends went away to college and I'm left behind. I don't know how to make friends without hearing. I feel your pain. Do you know any sign language? I am just starting to learn.
 

Beowulf

Well-Known Member
Premium Member
#30
I lost my hearing a few years ago. When this first happened I isolated myself to my house. Just recently I've started to do something about it. I did go to the audiologist who referred me for cochlear implants. I didn't qualify for the cochlear because my ears are so messed up from meningitis. I am angry and depressed a lot. I do feel lonely. All my friends went away to college and I'm left behind. I don't know how to make friends without hearing. I feel your pain. Do you know any sign language? I am just starting to learn.
I feel for you. I really do.
That is because I was young once.
Now I feel like hollering at you.
 

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