Age Gap Relationship

caz

Active Member
#2
I often wonder in this situation why the older one not encouraging the younger one to go out into world and live if older one loves younger one
 

Reba

Retired Terp
Premium Member
#3
Why would someone 34 years old be interested in a relationship with a high school student? Are they both on an equal basis?
 

Jezie

Well-Known Member
#4
Not too much of an age gap, but with one being 18 ... I find that too close to being a pedo... but not my monkeys...
 

whatdidyousay!

Well-Known Member
#5
This really depend on the people involved , there are some mature 18 yo and some very immature 18 yo and 34 yo . I would be careful if you are the 18 yo person and take your time getting to know the 34 yo person .
The 18yo needs to feel comfortable being around people older than her/him.

This is my 2 cents , others may add their too.
I am thinking you're not sure yourself or you would not be asking this question , maybe this is about other couple ?


@ Reba , I can't help but wonder if the 18 yo is better off financially , money came to my mind right away.
 

MMcC

New Member
#6
My partner and I met when I was 32. He was 60 at the time. We are celebrating our 25th anniversary this week! Yay!. If you think that age defines you, then you will be stuck with that perspective. If you think that your soulmate might be any age... then you may find happiness.
 
#8
My partner and I met when I was 32. He was 60 at the time. We are celebrating our 25th anniversary this week! Yay!. If you think that age defines you, then you will be stuck with that perspective. If you think that your soulmate might be any age... then you may find happiness.
60 and 32 can be a lot closer in "age" than 18 and 34 though. My wife and I are 8 years apart ourselves, and it's never been an issue. Emotionally and stability-wise we feel more or less on the same level, which is the important part. When we got together we were in similar positions in life (both doing the University thing) and more or less equally supported each other.

18 and 34... I guess it could work if the people are unique, a young 34 year old could easily feel in their 20s (I feel like I'm in my late 20s or so and I'm 36 now). If the 18 year old felt older... was mature enough to fit in with 20-somethings... Maybe? Supporting could be an issue though. An 18 year old doesn't have the experience to emotionally support someone the way a 30+ year old can. Then financially... that just depends on the situation and what each person is willing to get in to.

I don't know though, that's a tough gap to meet emotionally and in life position. I'd say it's fair to try, but set expectations on both side truthfully (which really applies with any age gap) and understand that the younger person will very likely change significantly over the course of the next decade. Since such dramatic change is likely, take it slow with the strong commitments (marriage).
 

hoichi

Well-Known Member
#9
18 is in no way close to being physicaly pre puberty. Pedophelia is the attraction to children pre puberty. So unless this 18 year old has not entered puberty. This is fine.
There is nothing wrong with age gaps.
Why would a person of 34 be intwrested in an 18 year old and vice versa?
All kinds of reasons. They can have things in common, interests,joys, those things are not age dependent. They could fins each other hot, They could like the same art.enjoy the same foods, or activities who knows.
Its not any ones bussiness really.
18 is the magic number the law uses for bieng an adult.
So be it.
Have fun,enjoy your life..sooner then you think youll be dead, and dust before then wind..
 

DeafDucky

Well-Known Member
#11
The actual gap probably doesn't matter but I'd worry a little if one of the pair is 18. Even in an average gap (such as 18 and 22 maybe) 18 could be a tad young.

Depends on what each wants out of the relationship too. If it's a causal thing- dating then why not.. go for it. Probably need to do more discussing if it goes beyond that.

I know of two couples who have a 13 year age gap. One couple is still together (as far as I know) the other divorced (or are at least separated) but for other reasons than the age gap thing. Another couple I know is 8 years apart with the woman being the older one- they're divorced now- nothing to do with the age gap though.

Really depends on the people in the relationship not the ages and the gap between the ages. You could have a couple only 1 year apart and they fight like cats and dogs while another couple with 15 years between them look like the perfect couple.
 

Jezie

Well-Known Member
#12
18 is in no way close to being physicaly pre puberty. Pedophelia is the attraction to children pre puberty. So unless this 18 year old has not entered puberty. This is fine.
There is nothing wrong with age gaps.
Why would a person of 34 be intwrested in an 18 year old and vice versa?
All kinds of reasons. They can have things in common, interests,joys, those things are not age dependent. They could fins each other hot, They could like the same art.enjoy the same foods, or activities who knows.
Its not any ones bussiness really.
18 is the magic number the law uses for bieng an adult.
So be it.
Have fun,enjoy your life..sooner then you think youll be dead, and dust before then wind..
No it is not... but ... and this may be judgmental of me... but everyone I have ever met that was in their late 20s and over, who have cast their eyes to the 18 crowd have been ... twisted or pedo... but that is for another thread...
Also, at 18 they have not fully physically and mentally matured into adulthood... so ...
 

DeafDucky

Well-Known Member
#14
Not too much of an age gap, but with one being 18 ... I find that too close to being a pedo... but not my monkeys...
Jez you lost me with monkeys

Caz-
she kind of shortened an idiom. There is a Polish idiom that translates to "Not my circus, not my monkeys". Loose definition would be... "It's not my problem".

Here's one observation of the phrase-
http://observationdeck.kinja.com/not-my-circus-not-my-monkeys-457554833
In Poland, there's an idiom that I've recently fallen in love with. Nie mój cyrk, nie moje małpy . . . literally, "not my circus, not my monkey;" figuratively, "not my problem."

I guess monkeys are "problems" in Poland, and circuses are where "problems" come from. If it's not your monkey, and it's not even from your circus, then it's not your problem.
 

hoichi

Well-Known Member
#15
No it is not... but ... and this may be judgmental of me... but everyone I have ever met that was in their late 20s and over, who have cast their eyes to the 18 crowd have been ... twisted or pedo... but that is for another thread...
Also, at 18 they have not fully physically and mentally matured into adulthood... so ...
18 your an adult. Fully formed...though everyone is different.
If you have developed normaly (lack of a better word), then there is no pyhysical plm between those ages. Regarding sex.
Its just culture that sees it as something twisted. And culture is always changing.
What goes on between two adults is between them. Good for them...
If they hook up..
Hope it works out if not. Cool
 

Jezie

Well-Known Member
#18
18 your an adult. Fully formed...thiugh everyone is different.
If you have devekoped normaly (lack of a better word), then there is no pyhysical plm between those ages. Regarding sex.
Its just culture that sees it as something twisted. And culture isbakways changing.
What goes on between two adults is between them. Good for them...
If they hook up..
Hooe it woeks out if not. Cool
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=141164708

http://mentalhealthdaily.com/2015/02/18/at-what-age-is-the-brain-fully-developed/

As for physical development those I find mostly in books... however, physically even after 18 until about 23-30 the body continues to fill out in both sexes....
Regardless that is also for a differnet thread...
 

caz

Active Member
#20
DO op want advice because I think the older one is selfish...I would been heart broken if my son done that at 18 also be saddened if he been older one..If 21plus I live with it but at least let young one have had chance do done something other than leave school get married..
Watching tv about this sort of thing 16yr old married 58yr old..the other was 28yr old man married 90yr old woman..they said happy but how define it if known nothing else school and marriage
 

Communication Software for Deaf Hard of Hearing - NexTalk

Top