Abuse and Neglect of Children with Disabilities

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
#21
That is so sad parents not wanting their b/c they had add ADHD . :(
My daughter told there kids waiting for visit from their parents at the group home she worked at and it was so sad . I won't let anyone take care of child when she was little only my sister or some friends I trusted.
I couldn't trust my own parents to protect me as a child so I was very
protected of my child . My friends called me Ma Bear when it came to my baby.
Agreed...... Unless of course it was severe. I think sometimes people may forget that even realtively common conditions can be severe and very difficult to deal with. Not excusing that parent.....as I think that's heartbreaking...but sometimes parents cannot cope.
 

DeafNerdMommy

Well-Known Member
#22
Agreed...... Unless of course it was severe. I think sometimes people may forget that even realtively common conditions can be severe and very difficult to deal with. Not excusing that parent.....as I think that's heartbreaking...but sometimes parents cannot cope.
I understand that we are all human, but to abuse or neglect them? Of course putting them in foster care doesn't help either. Some times they are abused or neglect more. Some are raped. I think it is sad that some people throw away children because they need extra love. I knew a girl that aborted a baby she wanted because they told her her chance of having a down baby was higher. I love my babies, health problems and all.
 

whatdidyousay!

Well-Known Member
#23
Agreed...... Unless of course it was severe. I think sometimes people may forget that even realtively common conditions can be severe and very difficult to deal with. Not excusing that parent.....as I think that's heartbreaking...but sometimes parents cannot cope.
I know some conditions can be very severe and a child may need around the clock care . My daughter had a friend who's twin brother was like this , the mother had to stay home all day and her daughter had to watch her brother after school and wasn't able to take part in any high school actives .
My daughter would go to her friend house to visit and help her . I really didn't think it was fair that the girl didn't have a social life b/c she had to care for her brother all the time. I am sure some parents that could afford it would had put the boy into a group home to get around the clock care.
In Russia kids like this were locked and forgotten about by the family . :(
 

whatdidyousay!

Well-Known Member
#26
I've heard about the conditions in Russian orphanages/children's home, even today....
Yes this is sadly true . I saw a show on this a few years back . I took a course on Russian history in collage b/c I wanted to know more about dad's country. I asked my teacher how children with disabilities were threated there and she told they locked up and forgotten about . This helped me to understand why dad rejected me so much, it didn't give him an excuse to abuse me but I learned why he did .


http://www.nbcnews.com/id/21790870/...t-disabled-people-abused-serbia/#.VpgFi-lFCM8
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
#28
I know some conditions can be very severe and a child may need around the clock care . My daughter had a friend who's twin brother was like this , the mother had to stay home all day and her daughter had to watch her brother after school and wasn't able to take part in any high school actives .
My daughter would go to her friend house to visit and help her . I really didn't think it was fair that the girl didn't have a social life b/c she had to care for her brother all the time. I am sure some parents that could afford it would had put the boy into a group home to get around the clock care.
In Russia kids like this were locked and forgotten about by the family . :(
AMEN! That's why I support insisisutions and or group homes for profoundly affected kids...And before I am attacked an insistution is SIMPLY a matter of how many residents are allowed... I forget the exact ratio, but it's more then a group home. Insistutions are basicly pediatric/young adult nursing homes....and they can be really nice. It is TOO hard for a parent to take care of a child who is essentially a baby or toddler on their own, at home.
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
#29
I understand that we are all human, but to abuse or neglect them? Of course putting them in foster care doesn't help either. Some times they are abused or neglect more. Some are raped. I think it is sad that some people throw away children because they need extra love. I knew a girl that aborted a baby she wanted because they told her her chance of having a down baby was higher. I love my babies, health problems and all.
Oh no..... I didn't mean it that way. NOTHING excuses abuse or neglect. I'm just saying I could understand a foster care placement for a kid with severe ADD. Sometimes parents might not be able to cope with severe ADD.
 

DeafNerdMommy

Well-Known Member
#30
I see I'm sorry I took it a different way.
My friend in middle school raise her severely autistic brother because her parents were to busy doing drugs. I use to help her with him. He was 13 and couldn't talk, eat by himself, use the bathroom, and has never left the house. He was put into the foster system and it helped him which was amazing. He is now 20 and can talk and has a job. He still can't live alone but he can make his own money like an adult which is amazing. I felt like my friend was forced to raise her brother because he was autistic and her parents couldn't handle it anymore. Her mother got into meth and her father up and left when she was 12.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using AllDeaf App mobile app
 

caz

Active Member
#31
On news today there another test for Down's can be done early with mothers blood..I have difficulty with this bringing up Down's not easy and people think oh aren't they sweet but not when they grow up.
My opinion have abortion with the reason just don't want pregnancy it mistake as soon as give reasons like this Down's you open up terrible consequences..
I knew of woman had deaf child got pregnant again and ultra sound or something like that discover deaf Cetus she said no cope and had abortion using unborn baby deafness as reason that appauling.If said just can't cope with 2nd child. Left it at that things been different,When sib finds out reason the baby was aborted how this going effect her it was headline news at the time..myself would done shared care with deaf family
 

DeafDucky

Well-Known Member
#32
AMEN! That's why I support insisisutions and or group homes for profoundly affected kids...And before I am attacked an insistution is SIMPLY a matter of how many residents are allowed... I forget the exact ratio, but it's more then a group home. Insistutions are basicly pediatric/young adult nursing homes....and they can be really nice. It is TOO hard for a parent to take care of a child who is essentially a baby or toddler on their own, at home.
The one I worked at many years ago was for that reason.. and also had a behavior treatment unit to deal with severe negative behaviors (agression, SIB etc...). In the time I was there we used the term 'Residential facility' more than institution as the term institution tended to carry negative perceptions unfortunately.

Places like where I worked was a good alternative for parents who couldn't or didn't know how to deal with their child or for those whose parents pretty much abandoned them and are under DHS/DYFS custody. Some did come to live there for a few years before returning home or transitioned into a group home. Some came there when they were very young (one came when she was around 6) and stayed there the rest of their lives (wonder if the one I just mentioned is still there- she was on my case load...). If the place has a good staff to client ratio and there is an active plan in place to teach independence or other skills... I think it's a good alternative. In some ways I miss working there... in other ways I don't miss it at all.
 

whatdidyousay!

Well-Known Member
#33
On news today there another test for Down's can be done early with mothers blood..I have difficulty with this bringing up Down's not easy and people think oh aren't they sweet but not when they grow up.
My opinion have abortion with the reason just don't want pregnancy it mistake as soon as give reasons like this Down's you open up terrible consequences..
I knew of woman had deaf child got pregnant again and ultra sound or something like that discover deaf Cetus she said no cope and had abortion using unborn baby deafness as reason that appauling.If said just can't cope with 2nd child. Left it at that things been different,When sib finds out reason the baby was aborted how this going effect her it was headline news at the time..myself would done shared care with deaf family
I heard of people having tests to see if their baby will have Down's :(.
I agree that would be awful if child found her mom didn't want her baby b/c it would had been deaf . If the child is the only deaf person in the family it would had been nice having a sibling that was deaf too. What if she had twins that were deaf ???
 

DeafNerdMommy

Well-Known Member
#34
I knew a girl that got the downs test and it came back with faint results, so she worried about it for the last months of her pregnancy. She even looked into an ophanage. Her son was perfectly fine in every way. She said she will never get that test again. I have not gotten that test and don't want it either

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using AllDeaf App mobile app
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
#36
The one I worked at many years ago was for that reason.. and also had a behavior treatment unit to deal with severe negative behaviors (agression, SIB etc...). In the time I was there we used the term 'Residential facility' more than institution as the term institution tended to carry negative perceptions unfortunately.

Places like where I worked was a good alternative for parents who couldn't or didn't know how to deal with their child or for those whose parents pretty much abandoned them and are under DHS/DYFS custody. Some did come to live there for a few years before returning home or transitioned into a group home. Some came there when they were very young (one came when she was around 6) and stayed there the rest of their lives (wonder if the one I just mentioned is still there- she was on my case load...). If the place has a good staff to client ratio and there is an active plan in place to teach independence or other skills... I think it's a good alternative. In some ways I miss working there... in other ways I don't miss it at all.
THANK YOU DeafDucky! I thought I was going to be attacked..... But yeah....in some cases residental facillities for severe and profound ID kids NEED to be utlized. It's all warm and fuzzy to be all " those kids NEED to be in the community." But even kids who live in residental places still get a very hefty dose of interaction with the community. And yeah you're right.....if the place has a good staff to client ratio and has safety measures in place to prevent abuse or whatever, then its a good option. Only a very small percentage of ID kids would need such placement, but the option should always be there!
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
#37
On news today there another test for Down's can be done early with mothers blood..I have difficulty with this bringing up Down's not easy and people think oh aren't they sweet but not when they grow up.
My opinion have abortion with the reason just don't want pregnancy it mistake as soon as give reasons like this Down's you open up terrible consequences..
I knew of woman had deaf child got pregnant again and ultra sound or something like that discover deaf Cetus she said no cope and had abortion using unborn baby deafness as reason that appauling.If said just can't cope with 2nd child. Left it at that things been different,When sib finds out reason the baby was aborted how this going effect her it was headline news at the time..myself would done shared care with deaf family
OMG yeah, Caz. I don't support theraputic abortion for conditions where it can be lived with. But yeah....... most people really do not understand how tough life can be for kids with Down's.....Down's can also be quite severe, and take a LOT of energy to manage. There's more to life then that Cute Little Kid with Down's.
It horrifies me that someone would have an abortion due to deafness.....and deafness alone, not just dhh with really severe issues. Deafness is perfectly managable. You give the kid ALL the skills possible, and they can and do often have an amazing life. There are no boundaries when you're deaf.....deaf people can do anything except hear!
 

caz

Active Member
#38
There was big thing about it at the time.....nobody could see her problem with right education and help with sensory social team things would been ok.
I love my daughter to bits but if she been my first child I doubt had second but my situation different.yes very cute if have mild Down's not so cute lugging middle aged woman along.
I never critercise anyone who want end pregnancy but giving reasons like Down's blind deaf that wrong no need give reason other than I don't want baby it was mistake
 

deafdyke

Well-Known Member
#39
There was big thing about it at the time.....nobody could see her problem with right education and help with sensory social team things would been ok.
I love my daughter to bits but if she been my first child I doubt had second but my situation different.yes very cute if have mild Down's not so cute lugging middle aged woman along.
I never critercise anyone who want end pregnancy but giving reasons like Down's blind deaf that wrong no need give reason other than I don't want baby it was mistake
Where's the LOVE button? I know. The Down's/ID people are cute when they are little, but when they're older/middle aged....it really is quite sad. I know it's not PC to say that.....But dude..... if only there was a cure for ID.........
 

Bottesini

Old Deaf Ranter
Premium Member
#40
Where's the LOVE button? I know. The Down's/ID people are cute when they are little, but when they're older/middle aged....it really is quite sad. I know it's not PC to say that.....But dude..... if only there was a cure for ID.........
Give me a break. I know personally several Downs people who work and live decent lives.

It all depends upon degree. Not every person with Down Syndrome is living a sad life.
 

Communication Software for Deaf Hard of Hearing - NexTalk

Top