respect for the Deaf

verucasglory

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Hi,
I'm currently taking a perspectives of Deafness class in college and I was wondering how a hearing person would go about showing respect for Deaf people. :confused:

So far I was thinking that the hearing person could use the Deaf person's preferred modality of communication, like writing everything down versus speaking to them because they're able to read lips. The hearing person could also reject the "stigma" of being Deaf by attempting to communicate with that person, even if it might be difficult, especially if the hearing person doesn't know ASL.

I was also wondering how society could show their respect. Maybe they could organize a Deaf advocacy group?

So, if you're Deaf, how would you wanted to be treated by a hearing person & society?

I'm unsure how to address this issue without sounding offensive or naive. Any ideas or suggestions would be very helpful, hope to get a response soon!! Thanks.
 
I'm deaf myself and I am currently being around with hearing people and it is very difficult for me to get them to communicate with me just because they don't want to be bothered with learning ASL finger spelling. My speech pathologist is helping me make my communications easier so that I can talk to hearing people on my own without needing an interpreter. I have a TTY-like speech device and many hearing people don't understand what that is for so I just have to use it more often so they will see that I can communicate in different way.
 
Talk to a deaf person as you would want to be talked to. How do you want a person greeting you? Talk to you? Come up to you? Keep in mind that generalism sort of is dying here... not everyone is the same, and they may have different preferences. I'm gonna go with my own preferences here...

That means no conscending attitudes (dont act as if the deaf person is the one NEEDING help unless you work in a store or a place of business). If the deaf person gestures that he or she cannot use voice, ask if you can write back and forth (use simple gestures). Don't stand there like a deer hit by headlights. It's usually an awkward moment, inviting opportunities for disrespect and respect.. however intentional or unintentional. The path of less resistence is often a good one to take. A sign of disrespect for me is that someone will often choose silence and stare openly, and then look away.. to gossip with someone else about you. That has happened often to me-- why do you think people at some places of business drag out their managers to deal with deaf people rather than dealing with them themselves? Sissies. Ha! :)

It's even more fun if you use "international" sign language... in my opinion, if you dont know ASL. I often use ISL with other deaf people in Norway where I'm living in.. I'm still learning Norwegian Sign Language, and by means, still a rookie.

Avoid looking like you are mocking the SL, though. :) Nothing pisses off some deaf folks than that. LOL You just might get the "bird"- it's a sign that you understand, right? LOL

It's more of a people barrier than it is a language barrier, right? That's why we have all those NAD advocacy groups. If you really wish to do something more than just talking to a deaf person, you certainly can volunteer somehow at an animal shelter that you know have deaf animals.. there are deaf pets, too-- that you can cuddle without being slapped. :) Or get involved with deaf clubs locally found in your area. Bigger the area, more likely it is to have a deaf club.
 
Liza, I would love to print out your post and give it to some of the hearing people I work with!

Having said that...

Liza said:
(dont act as if the deaf person is the one NEEDING help unless you work in a store or a place of business)

...you know, old hearing habits die hard. I'm an interpreter so you'd think I'd know better, right? And yet the other day I was waiting in line at the drugstore behind an older guy. When I got to the counter beside him I saw that he was writing notes back and forth with the pharmacist (who, by the way, was treating the man with total respect). I asked the gentleman if he was deaf, and he signed yes, and then I signed "need interpret?"

Now I know that this wouldn't be seen by most people as similar to, say, jumping in and starting to interpret without even asking, but I always try to make a point of asking WANT instead of NEED...as in, "would an interpreter make this easier for you?" as opposed to "do you need a hearing person to help you?" It was a good reminder that even after years of training and experience and educating other hearing people, audism can still rear its ugly head!

(The man, by the way, couldn't have been nicer in letting me know that he and the pharmacist were communicating fine, and then we had a friendly chat. He was clearly not offended but I still felt like a goof!) :Oops:
 
Interpretrator- go ahead! Thanks for the interest. Hey... I've been known to make a fool out of myself, too. Human nature, I think? I think it was nice of you to ask, at least. LOL My god, what if that guy was getting his viagra prescription refilled and you interpreted for him? :laugh2:

Deaf old guy: *waves* *signs:* Hello, me here get my V-I-A-G-R-A. Thanks.

Interpretrator: "Hello, I'm here to get my Viagra prescription refilled.. thank you."

Pharmacist: "Allright, let me see.. how did the last dosage work out for you? Any side effects?"

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Uh...damn." *signs:* How V-I-A-G-R-A work out for you in past? Problems?

Deaf old guy: *signs:* W-E-L-L, problems.. yes. My wife said it too much, and my (using the p-nose sign) not get down for days. Problems for my wife and pants, yes. But I not care, not mind. Gimme my V-I-A-G-R-A! *spittle flies all over*

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Holy fuck!"

-----------------------------------------
Hee hee.. couldnt resist that. Forgive me.

I think... for myself, when somebody puts themselves in a position to help me-- I feel like it's nearly impossible to make friends. It would be like being friends with my mother or the school nurse. :lol:

Think it's a Freudian thing?
 
HA! Too damn funny!

Maybe that IS why he didn't want an interpreter... :D
 
LOL... good point. ;)

Now how would you like the deaf to treat you with respect? Respect goes both streets, right?
 
Liza said:
Now how would you like the deaf to treat you with respect? Respect goes both streets, right?

True, in a perfect world. Unfortunately I know that some deaf people don't like interpreters, probably because of bad experiences they've had in the past. So sometimes either deaf clients or just people I meet at deaf events are rude or demanding or simply blow me off once they learn I'm an interpreter. I understand it, and it's their right, but I don't particularly like it, since they're just assuming that I must be like whatever crappy interpreter(s) they've had in the past.

That's really only a few people, though. Mostly I find if I show respect, I get respect back. Often I have to go through the "why did you learn sign language?" question first before they're ok with me, but I understand that too. There are a LOT of hearing people out there with terrible motivations for getting involved in Deaf culture. Some on this board, in fact.

I'll tell you, I have seen many more HEARING people be disrespectful of me than deaf people. :roll:
 
Liza said:
Interpretrator- go ahead! Thanks for the interest. Hey... I've been known to make a fool out of myself, too. Human nature, I think? I think it was nice of you to ask, at least. LOL My god, what if that guy was getting his viagra prescription refilled and you interpreted for him? :laugh2:

Deaf old guy: *waves* *signs:* Hello, me here get my V-I-A-G-R-A. Thanks.

Interpretrator: "Hello, I'm here to get my Viagra prescription refilled.. thank you."

Pharmacist: "Allright, let me see.. how did the last dosage work out for you? Any side effects?"

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Uh...damn." *signs:* How V-I-A-G-R-A work out for you in past? Problems?

Deaf old guy: *signs:* W-E-L-L, problems.. yes. My wife said it too much, and my (using the p-nose sign) not get down for days. Problems for my wife and pants, yes. But I not care, not mind. Gimme my V-I-A-G-R-A! *spittle flies all over*

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Holy fuck!"

-----------------------------------------
Hee hee.. couldnt resist that. Forgive me.

I think... for myself, when somebody puts themselves in a position to help me-- I feel like it's nearly impossible to make friends. It would be like being friends with my mother or the school nurse. :lol:

Think it's a Freudian thing?

:rofl: thats sooo HILARIOUS Liza! thanks for a great laugh!
 
Respect?

Hello, since I am deaf, what I would like the most from hearing speaking of respect? The simple answer is...


JUST ACCEPT MY DEAFNESS, TREAT ME LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE! END OF DISCUSSION!

That is it!
 
Liza said:
Interpretrator- go ahead! Thanks for the interest. Hey... I've been known to make a fool out of myself, too. Human nature, I think? I think it was nice of you to ask, at least. LOL My god, what if that guy was getting his viagra prescription refilled and you interpreted for him? :laugh2:

Deaf old guy: *waves* *signs:* Hello, me here get my V-I-A-G-R-A. Thanks.

Interpretrator: "Hello, I'm here to get my Viagra prescription refilled.. thank you."

Pharmacist: "Allright, let me see.. how did the last dosage work out for you? Any side effects?"

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Uh...damn." *signs:* How V-I-A-G-R-A work out for you in past? Problems?

Deaf old guy: *signs:* W-E-L-L, problems.. yes. My wife said it too much, and my (using the p-nose sign) not get down for days. Problems for my wife and pants, yes. But I not care, not mind. Gimme my V-I-A-G-R-A! *spittle flies all over*

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Holy fuck!"

-----------------------------------------
Hee hee.. couldnt resist that. Forgive me.

I think... for myself, when somebody puts themselves in a position to help me-- I feel like it's nearly impossible to make friends. It would be like being friends with my mother or the school nurse. :lol:

Think it's a Freudian thing?

lol and my interpreter signed viagra in my English class and I laughed very much. lmao
 
rjr2006 said:
lol and my interpreter signed viagra in my English class and I laughed very much. lmao

Really? What is the sign for Viagra? I mean I can think up plenty... :lol: But is there an "official" one?
 
Interpretrator said:
Really? What is the sign for Viagra? I mean I can think up plenty... :lol: But is there an "official" one?

Fingerspell it.

Steve
 
Liza said:
Interpretrator- go ahead! Thanks for the interest. Hey... I've been known to make a fool out of myself, too. Human nature, I think? I think it was nice of you to ask, at least. LOL My god, what if that guy was getting his viagra prescription refilled and you interpreted for him? :laugh2:

Deaf old guy: *waves* *signs:* Hello, me here get my V-I-A-G-R-A. Thanks.

Interpretrator: "Hello, I'm here to get my Viagra prescription refilled.. thank you."

Pharmacist: "Allright, let me see.. how did the last dosage work out for you? Any side effects?"

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Uh...damn." *signs:* How V-I-A-G-R-A work out for you in past? Problems?

Deaf old guy: *signs:* W-E-L-L, problems.. yes. My wife said it too much, and my (using the p-nose sign) not get down for days. Problems for my wife and pants, yes. But I not care, not mind. Gimme my V-I-A-G-R-A! *spittle flies all over*

Interpretrator: (Thinking) "Holy fuck!"

-----------------------------------------
Hee hee.. couldnt resist that. Forgive me.

I think... for myself, when somebody puts themselves in a position to help me-- I feel like it's nearly impossible to make friends. It would be like being friends with my mother or the school nurse. :lol:

Think it's a Freudian thing?


Oh boo-laughing hell hard!! :rofl: So hell damn funny LIZA!
 
there is no actual sign for viagra, but my mom came up with the sign of "penis" (Signed English) and I was very surprised that she signed the appearance of the penis.
 
rjr2006 said:
there is no actual sign for viagra, but my mom came up with the sign of "penis" (Signed English) and I was very surprised that she signed the appearance of the penis.

Well viagra can be signed with the word 'erection' then the word 'pill'

Richard
 
I have to say - hearing people should make some accomodation for deaf people. Let me give you an example. This is when my hearing wasn't really bad (now I am legally deaf).

I went to a fast food restuarant and placed my order. At this restuarant, they take the order, take your name, and when the food is ready, they yell out your name. I was standing next to the counter waiting for my order when two deaf friends came walking in. I told them I wanted to see how they would treat deaf people.

The restuarant workers asked them what they wanted to order. My friends are not oralists, so they pointed to the menu items they wanted. So the person taking the order asked them again what did they want. My friends pointed to their ears and shook their heads no. Then pointed again to the menu items they wanted. A third time, the worker asked them what they wanted. Finally one of the deaf women took out a piece of paper and wrote down their order and handed it to them. The worker then read the order and asked the deaf woman, "Is this what you want?"

Then worker ran up the order and wrote a note, "what name should I put down for your order." One of the deaf women wrote back, "doesn't matter. we can't hear. please bring our food to us." And then they sat down at a table next to mine.

We started to visit and then I heard something but couldn't really understand it. A few minutes later I heard the worker yell out, "the order for the two ladies is ready." I told one of my friends what they yelled and one asked the other, "Should I go get it?" The other woman said, "No, let's see how long it takes them to bring it out. They know we can't hear." A few minutes later I heard the worker yell even louder, "The order for the two deaf ladies is...." Then he stopped, came out in front of all the tables and again yelled. "The order for the two deaf ladies is ready. You can come up and pick it up." I told my friend what just happened and that I thought these people are just plain stupid. So then one of my friends had a great idea.

She then went up to the counter and wrote a note. "Is our order ready? We have been waiting for it." The worker wrote back, "We have been yelling at you that its ready."

I thought the restuarant worker should have made the accomodation of letting the person know her order was ready. In fact, they should have just brought it out to her.
 
... Wow. I mean..I know plenty of hearies that are kinda slow.. myself sometimes included... but wow. Wouldn't this man feel stupid yelling "The order for the two deaf ladies is ready?" I mean, heellooo, anybody in there?
Then again, as a sign language student and deaf studies major I can't tell you how many times I have been asked,
1. "Death studies? Why are you interested in that?"
-even better "You are studying what studies?" (Ah, the irony)
2. "Oh, are you learning braille too?"
3. "Oh... that's actually a major... what do you learn?"
4. "So, you've taken a couple classes in sign language. You know it all then, right?" (I WISH)
5. "Isn't sign language universal?"
6. "Aren't deaf people really quiet?" (again, HA)
7. "You can interpret sign language for a job?"
8. "I didn't know you were so interested in helping older people. You know my grandma is losing her hearing and..."
9. "Aww... it's so nice you want to help disabled people." (what is the best response to this?)
10. "Oh sweetie, that's nice, but the correct term is hearing impaired."
As I am going to be graduating high school soon, many people are asking me about my college choice and my major. Also, occasionally, my interest in ASL, etc. comes up when I'm talking to people. There is so much info. I want to give them when people are curious about sign language, deaf culture, etc. I have trouble deciding what to say. Obviously one cannot explain much about anything in a few minutes, but does anyone have any suggestions on basic info. I could give ppl who are interested, a lil fyi that would help them with treating/communicating with the deafies they come into contact with? j/c
 
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