Courtesy and Respect at AllDeaf

Alex

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With the new year upon us, we can reflect back to the days of AllDeaf.com (AD) in 2004 reminiscing the many threads and posts of various types of opinions, feelings, attitudes that truly shaped the overall image of AD. Presently, as AD faces new challenges in the coming new year whereas some attitudes and respect is rampant and disheartening for members in AD up to the point to implement new guidelines. AD is presently working in great strides to warrant any new guidelines as needed in order to allow this site to run smoothly and being effective for all its members.

In the last few months of 2004, AD has seen and felt blows of bitterness, anger and frustrations spread out in the posts and threads in which the rules conformed to AD have been quashed upon and ignored. At which the freedom of speech is readily and easily debatable of where it's appropriate and proper to draw the line. Yet at the same time, instilling the means to be courteous and upholding respect toward ALL members fittingly holds the 'key' for freedom of speech at its best without stepping over into any members' stance when it comes to the variety of opinions and ideas expressed across this Forum. Evidently, there will always be cases whereas certain issues will not be agreed on, where opinions differs from others, etc., and how it is being corresponded and relayed which is steadily getting out of hand by way of flame-wars, bashing, intolerable and rude replies to the dismay of many members, hurting or insulting members' beliefs, feelings and opinions. This not only degrades the image of AD, but the philosophy that AD so dearly adheres to and maintains is gradually being picked apart little by little. All the thrashing, bickering and finger-pointing needs to cease. Obviously, not everyone is going to get along with one another, but if we can put into more efforts on our part to know when NOT to post something which might otherwise be considered offensive, bashing, down-right rude, finger-pointing, etc., and being able to come across with posts that's much more tolerable and done so in a civilized matter.

What can we do to give the 'face-lift' that AD graciously could use? Not that AD is miserably troubled or in danger of having its functional operations coming to a screeching halt. Members are being turned away, members are getting insulted or hurt, members losing interest. Naturally AD cannot please everyone, although, in due respect, AD can provide solitude for some, a place for inspiring and important information for some, relaxation for some, a place for good quality debating on a variety of issues, a place to share feelings whether it's personal or not (<will elaborate more on this in the next paragraph), a place where new friends or aquaintances are made and developed, a place where laughter, a smile, a chuckle can be felt. The list goes on and on. The important thing is that AD is here for your enjoyment, to use, to blend in and to interact with others. It's a community consisting from all walks of life even if the majority of the members are either deaf or HoH/CI, AD does welcome those who are hearing as members of AD to participate across the board.

There are times when members feel the need to post certain personal threads out of expressing the need to 'vent.' Although there isn't a problem when a member resort to this tactic, the underlying problem surfaces when a member or two start bickering or whining which invariably bring other members to the point of also making down-right harsh and rude posts. AllDeaf isn't a Forum where we can openly bash or thrash any member, if a member have the urge or the desires to deplorably and openly insult or bash others, there ARE other online sites that will cater to those needs. Here, a member will simply be warned and as for other extreme situations or viable reasons, a permanent ban will be imposed immediately. Bottom line is this: Think twice before replying to a specific 'vent' and take the time to consider whether the reply will be offensive, harsh, etc., and refrain from submitting it. If members have a problem with a certain 'vent' in AD, it would be most suitable in the course of action to contact any of the moderators here in AD...in cases of such extremity, contacting Alex is the final option to pursue.

Forum Rule:

5.) No bashing, flaming or harassing other participants. Period.
Even though we support freedom of speech, show some respect, use common sense, and keep an open mind when participating in discussions.
As specified above in detail, giving in to every effort to be respectful and courteous throughout AD, for those who don't will be warned or placed on a temporary ban. Understand this, if there is something 'bad' to say toward another member regardless what the topic or subject is, the consequences of a member's action(s) will be dealt with in a manner best served appropriately for the sake of AD's reputation and philosophies.

Another subject matter comes to attention for which there have been cases where off-topic posts is being carelessly done so. Several off-topic posts with an explaination or reason for doing so is fine while other posts that tends to stray far away from the topic in the thread is not only unneccessary, but could be considered rude in part. These type of posts needs to be forwarded to the moderators' attention so we can remove those posts. Members who invariably keeps posting off-topic posts constantly without due respect will be warned, after the third warning in relation to off-topic posts, a temporary ban will be implemented. Once again, off-topic posts noting a viable (good) cause and reason (intention) for doing so will be honored and excused. Members created threads for a purpose, let's stick to the topic for which the thread is concerned with.

Lastly, moderators here do strive hard to keep AD running smoothly so the pleasures and enjoyment of using AD can be a rewarding experience for all members. Alex has given so much of his time since the first days of AD and has brought it up to a highly professional standard of maintaining AD in its rightful position online which is bringing in more and more members into AD. Moderators can't always see every single post or be in AD every minute, therefore, if members could take a minute or two to contact any one of us moderators for any discrepancies (contradictions), problems, help, etc., you can send a 'pm' (private message) or on the main page of AD, scroll down to the bottom of the listings of forums and click onto 'View Forum Leaders' and proceed from there. Let's keep Alldeaf enjoyable for all members. Respect, respect, respect and being courteous despite the differences in opinions and thoughts conveyed in AllDeaf.com!

If there are any questions or not sure of any detail expressed herein, please do not hesitate to ask!

Thank you!

Roadrunner, AllDeaf Super Moderator
 
i do understand your concern and your rule(s)... and agree with you..

i do not have a problem venting out or hearing others venting out.. stating their feelings, opinions, feedback, etc... but when it comes to certain members repeating their patterns constantly such as negativity, looking for trouble, pity, etc.... i am sure you know who i am referring to.. it just gets very tiring.. so a majority of us get frustrated and thats when the insults start all over again.. it is like a cycle.. we need to stop reinventing the wheel.... so how do we prevent that from occuring?? hmmm...

edit: i try to be sensitive and respectful of others feelings but they just like to push our buttons for no apparent reasons if you dig me..
 
ahhhhh uummm RoadRunner?/ I thought it was Alex until the last part.


I found using the ignore button has made coming here much better for me
 
bbnt said:
I found using the ignore button has made coming here much better for me

I did that and then remove it, Don't ask why :dunno: stupid upon my part. I would have to do that again or I'll lose my hair. :Ohno:
 
zesty said:
i do understand your concern and your rule(s)... and agree with you..

i do not have a problem venting out or hearing others venting out.. stating their feelings, opinions, feedback, etc... but when it comes to certain members repeating their patterns constantly such as negativity, looking for trouble, pity, etc.... i am sure you know who i am referring to.. it just gets very tiring.. so a majority of us get frustrated and thats when the insults start all over again.. it is like a cycle.. we need to stop reinventing the wheel.... so how do we prevent that from occuring?? hmmm...

edit: i try to be sensitive and respectful of others feelings but they just like to push our buttons for no apparent reasons if you dig me..
:ily: well done you pressed the button correctly and I couldn't say it more bootiful...
 
That was an awesome announcement you created there Roadrunner, and I happen to agree with everything you said above 100%! :applause:

Well done honey! :hug:
 
I believe in being respectful towards one another - but the problem is, it's a two-way street...I have watched some members overlook this courtesy rule, and go ahead and post things that they KNOW are antagonizing and provocative. They get banned, then come right back and act out all over again. :dunno: Makes me wonder whether it's even worth it?

When an antagonist provokes, he or she solicits a response. When that response is attained, the antagonist will feed off of it. Goes full circle. That in mind, I'll say this - when something bothers me enough, I will respond to it according to my feelings/thoughts. I won't do so in a malicious manner, (i.e. direct name-calling) but I CAN and WILL BE firm. I believe that we have to be, sometimes - especially with problem members who may or may not realize what it is they are saying/doing. I do, however, maintain a certain degree of candor, and won't stoop to the antagonist's level by allowing myself to say what I REALLY want to say.

That's what IM's are for. ;)
 
Good thread, dear RR.

I has to agree everything what you said. I noticed few months since few new members come and spoil others's wonderful threads.................

I am hoping that everything will go smooth in 2005.
 
yea i agree with u RR! good job!!! i hope that this year BETTER MUCH than last year!
 
Alex (Especially to RoadRunner) thanks for overshadowing us as a great community and your statement really liften our morals. Let's hope for the best.
 
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I agree with Roadrunner totally. When everyone follows the rules in what he suggested, this AD will become a very enjoyable website to browse into and to make posts. I will do what RR suggests and would like everyone else to do the same. I applause Alex, RR and moderators for their job well done as I realize it's not easy job to do.
 
Some people may not just get what Roadrunner's saying, so I'll simplify the message for those clueless ones:

arguing.jpg
 
Malfoyish said:
I believe in being respectful towards one another - but the problem is, it's a two-way street...I have watched some members overlook this courtesy rule, and go ahead and post things that they KNOW are antagonizing and provocative. They get banned, then come right back and act out all over again. :dunno: Makes me wonder whether it's even worth it?

When an antagonist provokes, he or she solicits a response. When that response is attained, the antagonist will feed off of it. Goes full circle. That in mind, I'll say this - when something bothers me enough, I will respond to it according to my feelings/thoughts. I won't do so in a malicious manner, (i.e. direct name-calling) but I CAN and WILL BE firm. I believe that we have to be, sometimes - especially with problem members who may or may not realize what it is they are saying/doing. I do, however, maintain a certain degree of candor, and won't stoop to the antagonist's level by allowing myself to say what I REALLY want to say.
Very good post. Yes, RR's post is good but few members didn't pay any heed... and they still do that.

RoadRunner, I have to be brutally honest with you. That member causes the unpleasant... it made us harder to be able to enjoy posting around here. Good thing that Alex didn't block the ignore feature in VB's Admin option, it helped somewhat but still. As I told you before, that member will cause more problems in the future or cause some intelligent members to leave AD. I have been 'work' as moderator at 7 different communities (forums) for 5 years.. I know his kind and it is no good for communities but again, I am not a mod around here and AD is not my community so I couldn't do anything... but be aware that he will cause more unpleasant among us in the future if no one do nothing about it. Keep that in your mind.

Nowaday, these posts by him and few members aren't quality, it is just quantity of raving posts. I want to share my opinion about this issue/topic.

*shrugs* Peace out.

Note: I heard from people that he has been calling some members the names lately... no one did nothing about it. Interesting. But again, AD is less-pleasant for me to post around lately anyway.
 
Magatsu said:
Very good post. Yes, RR's post is good but few members didn't pay any heed... and they still do that.

RoadRunner, I have to be brutally honest with you. That member causes the unpleasant... it made us harder to be able to enjoy posting around here. Good thing that Alex didn't block the ignore feature in VB's Admin option, it helped somewhat but still. As I told you before, that member will cause more problems in the future or cause some intelligent members to leave AD. I have been 'work' as moderator at 7 different communities (forums) for 5 years.. I know his kind and it is no good for communities but again, I am not a mod around here and AD is not my community so I couldn't do anything... but be aware that he will cause more unpleasant among us in the future if no one do nothing about it. Keep that in your mind.

Nowaday, these posts by him and few members aren't quality, it is just quantity of raving posts. I want to share my opinion about this issue/topic.

*shrugs* Peace out.

Note: I heard from people that he has been calling some members the names lately... no one did nothing about it. Interesting. But again, AD is less-pleasant for me to post around lately anyway.

Agreed, Magatsu. :smash:
 
Magatsu said:
RoadRunner, I have to be brutally honest with you. That member causes the unpleasant... it made us harder to be able to enjoy posting around here. Good thing that Alex didn't block the ignore feature in VB's Admin option, it helped somewhat but still. As I told you before, that member will cause more problems in the future or cause some intelligent members to leave AD. I have been 'work' as moderator at 7 different communities (forums) for 5 years.. I know his kind and it is no good for communities but again, I am not a mod around here and AD is not my community so I couldn't do anything... but be aware that he will cause more unpleasant among us in the future if no one do nothing about it. Keep that in your mind.

Nowaday, these posts by him and few members aren't quality, it is just quantity of raving posts. I want to share my opinion about this issue/topic.

*shrugs* Peace out.

Note: I heard from people that he has been calling some members the names lately... no one did nothing about it. Interesting. But again, AD is less-pleasant for me to post around lately anyway.

:gpost:

I'm starting to feel the same way. There are really just two members that are really causing problems here. Ignoring them is an option, but we still see responses from others who have chosen to not ignore the offending party. Are we supposed to ignore those people to? If we did that, we'd all be ignoring each other!!!

Also, I have repeatedly seen threads go under review only to have posts removed, so the cycle can repeat itself. At this point, this isn't helping the situation.

The only way to deal with this issue is to remove the "cancer" that has permeated AD. I'm sorry to say this, but it might be the only way.
 
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i agree with u Magatsu, Ocean and Malfy -- there are specific members here that seems to like to stir up trouble and other BS and they do need to be removed

IMHO -- i believe the mod team members seems to be a bit too lax on really enforcing the rules that were posted -- i :dunno: whats up with that and i think some members have been given one too many "warnings" when they should have by now been permanently banned

otherwise -- i still enjoy making posts and reading here across the boards in some good threads however it gets a bit frustrating when it comes to members CONSTANTLY going off topic in practically every thread they decide to post in -- that needs to be improved on having members quit going off topic constantly -- im ok with a member going off topic momentarily if they said "i know i went off topic..." then they would post something to put it BACK on topic in the same post -- thats respectable IMO
 
Roadrunner has worked very hard on this last month, the days and weeks he had put time into it and even late on Christmas Eve, RR is trying to help make this forum a friendly and peaceful place to be in, yet I see some of you haven't said one word about his announcement but only brought up such things by pointing fingers at two members which most of you really can't stand, when this announcement has nothing to do with the two members only as this applies to ALL of the members here...

I am very disappointed to see some of you guys haven't seen the clear picture behind the announcement but had to point fingers toward two members here when it isn't about just them two....and they already have been warned or banned in the past, I suppose that isn't enough for the few of you here, but only seeking more and more, not giving the mods or the owner a chance to work this out for everyone, to see both sides of this instead of having a group of people tagging along and jumping on those two members only! I find this totally unfair...and personally, I do not like to see anyone get banned, but that will happen from time to time when rules have been broken, but I don't see any members being warned or banned for doing some of the same things that some of you guys are pointing fingers at these two members for...

I also noticed some of you no longer talk to me, is it because I don't see it your way but the other way only? Or think I am on the two member's side and not yours. This is not about whose side I am on but being fair in this, I see it both ways, I see other members making the same mistakes too, and noticed that none of you were warned for those mistakes or rules that was broken but only those two members were, no matter who comes in this forum, we will have people coming in and out of AD who is going to cause problems once in awhile, the mods and the owner isn't going to ban every single member that you happen to dislike, it doesn't work that way, The mods and the owner has to be fair in this, they have done everything they can to be fair, but that's not enough, you guys want more and more, and still rubbing on and off about those two members, when they do have feelings and knowing how much they are hated here and that's not even nice at all....I am not going to stand here and point my fingers at any one of you members when I know all of us have done our share of mistakes, not just those two...

The point is that this thread is not about two members here, but about an announcement and hopefully each of us can do our part as outlined in the announcement...Then maybe we'll be able to see good changes taking place in here and it starts with you...and me!
 
^Angel^ said:
Roadrunner has worked very hard on this last month, the days and weeks he had put time into it and even late on Christmas Eve, RR is trying to help make this forum a friendly and peaceful place to be in, yet I see some of you haven't said one word about his announcement but only brought up such things by pointing fingers at two members which most of you really can't stand, when this announcement has nothing to do with the two members only as this applies to ALL of the members here...

I am very disappointed to see some of you guys haven't seen the clear picture behind the announcement but had to point fingers toward two members here when it isn't about just them two....and they already have been warned or banned in the past, I suppose that isn't enough for the few of you here, but only seeking more and more, not giving the mods or the owner a chance to work this out for everyone, to see both sides of this instead of having a group of people tagging along and jumping on those two members only! I find this totally unfair...and personally, I do not like to see anyone get banned, but that will happen from time to time when rules have been broken, but I don't see any members being warned or banned for doing some of the same things that some of you guys are pointing fingers at these two members for...

I also noticed some of you no longer talk to me, is it because I don't see it your way but the other way only? Or think I am on the two member's side and not yours. This is not about whose side I am on but being fair in this, I see it both ways, I see other members making the same mistakes too, and noticed that none of you were warned for those mistakes or rules that was broken but only those two members were, no matter who comes in this forum, we will have people coming in and out of AD who is going to cause problems once in awhile, the mods and the owner isn't going to ban every single member that you happen to dislike, it doesn't work that way, The mods and the owner has to be fair in this, they have done everything they can to be fair, but that's not enough, you guys want more and more, and still rubbing on and off about those two members, when they do have feelings and knowing how much they are hated here and that's not even nice at all....I am not going to stand here and point my fingers at any one of you members when I know all of us have done our share of mistakes, not just those two...

The point is that this thread is not about two members here, but about an announcement and hopefully each of us can do our part as outlined in the announcement...Then maybe we'll be able to see good changes taking place in here and it starts with you...and me!
^Angel^ i really totally agree with u abt this.. i am tired of see this cause trouble, blame on each other... this is so immature... also i agree with RR worked hard and try get all the people be together to have fun, friendly and discuss each other in here.. but seem to me that some people dont care abt here.. i wish they should wake up and think twice abt this.. :hug: RR u are doing WONDERFUL JOB!
 
I would like to thank alex and roadrunner for their job to try to work out the post ... You guys did great job and trying your best to make AllDeaf community to look better. Hope things will work out soon. Good Posting everyone who posted. I'm hoping everything will work out soon. I know the moderators and some alldeaf members are trying to help out and giving respect and advices as much as they can.
 
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