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Unread 01-29-2011, 09:00 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Why is having to be a bitch the only way to be heard

Recently our EI "specialist" was kind enough to inform that I needed to be educated in the Deaf World/Deaf Culture/ Deaf Education before I could make a decision on my youngest daughters behalf. I for one don't claim to be a specialist in the field, but really? Give me a break, I AM and always will be aware of my daughters needs and the direction in which needs to be taken. Needless to say this "specialist" is no longer involved in my youngest life. We will and always will be part of the Deaf World and the ASL language, so please by all means be a Bitch on your childrens behalf and laugh it up when you know YOUR decision are the correct ones!
Momma of 2 - Taylor 14- Proufoundly Deaf and Sadie 30 months - Severe Reverse Slope Loss.
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Unread 04-29-2011, 08:36 AM   #2 (permalink)
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and you are hearing?
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Unread 05-03-2011, 01:19 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I'm sure your EI Specialist is only looking out for your daughter's best interests... Whats the harm in knowing EVERYTHING you can about all sides of the coin before making a decision that could affect her the rest of her life?

The attitude "I know whats best" won't get you far, you should be open to all kinds of information when you have to make an informed decision on behalf of someone else.

Hence getting a second opinion as such... There is no need to a bitch anywhere or any way in life.
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Unread 06-18-2011, 10:12 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Being Late Deafened I can tell you if you are hearing then you have absolutely no idea what it is like no matter if you are a good parent or not. There are decisions that will need to be made for her and being a good parent you should know the insides and outs of the decion and consequences if bad results.


Sometimes being a bitch is only half the battle!
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Unread 06-19-2011, 12:37 AM   #5 (permalink)
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The "know it all" attitude won't go very far and it could potentially do more harm than good for the child.

I suggest that you "LISTEN" to all of the facts before making a final decision of what's best for your child.

Yiz
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Unread 06-19-2011, 08:42 AM   #6 (permalink)
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and you are hearing?
Several hearing people on this thread. Most are hearing parents of deaf children.
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Unread 06-19-2011, 11:03 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Interesting how context can change people's reactions to the OP's post. You may not be aware that her children are being raised and educated within Deaf Culture and in ASL environment and those EI professionals she refers to may be challenging her knowledge of Deaf Culture and an ASL education as being the right place for her youngest daughter.

What you call her "know it all attitude" may just be her hands on experience with her eldest daughter's Deaf Ed vs. some wet behind the ears social worker's second hand assumption of what Deaf Ed and Deaf Culture are.
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Unread 06-19-2011, 11:56 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by ASLMommax2 View Post
Recently our EI "specialist" was kind enough to inform that I needed to be educated in the Deaf World/Deaf Culture/ Deaf Education before I could make a decision on my youngest daughters behalf. I for one don't claim to be a specialist in the field, but really? Give me a break, I AM and always will be aware of my daughters needs and the direction in which needs to be taken. Needless to say this "specialist" is no longer involved in my youngest life. We will and always will be part of the Deaf World and the ASL language, so please by all means be a Bitch on your childrens behalf and laugh it up when you know YOUR decision are the correct ones!
Momma of 2 - Taylor 14- Proufoundly Deaf and Sadie 30 months - Severe Reverse Slope Loss.
You have a 14 year old. So I am sure you know what needs to be done with the youngest. Seems like you have been down this road before.

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Originally Posted by yizuman View Post
The "know it all" attitude won't go very far and it could potentially do more harm than good for the child.

I suggest that you "LISTEN" to all of the facts before making a final decision of what's best for your child.

Yiz
She knows because she has been down that path before.

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Originally Posted by GrendelQ View Post
Interesting how context can change people's reactions to the OP's post. You may not be aware that her children are being raised and educated within Deaf Culture and in ASL environment and those EI professionals she refers to may be challenging her knowledge of Deaf Culture and an ASL education as being the right place for her youngest daughter.

What you call her "know it all attitude" may just be her hands on experience with her eldest daughter's Deaf Ed vs. some wet behind the ears social worker's second hand assumption of what Deaf Ed and Deaf Culture are.
It was obvious when she stated that she has a 14 year old profound deaf child. So we know she has experience in this and knows what to do with her youngest.

She also stated she uses ASL, and is part of the Deaf World. So Dunno what is the beef.
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Unread 06-20-2011, 03:15 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Maybe it's the way she came across in her original thread...

Ok yeah, she has obviously been down that path before as she has an older child who is deaf, but each person and each case is unique...

Surely if she was treated the way she was by her specialist with the 1st child, she wouldn't go back to the same one with the second child?

There's no harm in getting many opinions, exploring all options before making a decision... If she's involved in the Deaf community, surely there are people who have gone through similar circumstances be it themselves or their children?

There is also a big difference between being a strong parent, standing up for yours and your child(ren)s rights and being a downright bitch...
One does not have to resort to being a bitch to make people understand and to express your needs and opinion.

My comment to "know all attitude" was of course, not meant to be offensive etc. I just believe if you have to make a decision on behalf of someone else, you should be open minded and open to all suggestions and work out what would be best for your child (not what would be best for you)
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Unread 06-27-2011, 09:58 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yizuman View Post
The "know it all" attitude won't go very far and it could potentially do more harm than good for the child.

I suggest that you "LISTEN" to all of the facts before making a final decision of what's best for your child.

Yiz


It's usually best to keep an open mind and listen to what everyone has to say. It's easier to just listen to someone and then move on than it is to listen to someone and then kick them out of your life because you don't agree with what they say.

There will always be different advice from different people. One may be better than the other. One may never be the best. However, hearing 3 different things can sometimes help you look at those 3 things and come up with a 4th on your own.

Person A says, "1+5=6"
Person B says, "2+4=6"
Person C says, "3+3=6"

Does that mean there's only 3 options? No. By learning from those that other say, you've concluded that 6 can be added up in many ways.

So, you come up with "2+2+2=6" and "1+2+3=6"

Maybe the specialist didn't literally mean for you to study Deaf Culture in general, but to listen to your daughter's view of Deaf Culture so that you can understand how your daughter sees things.

I grew up mainstreamed in school. The definition of deaf culture during my time in school was different that the definition of deaf culture of those who are in school today (15 years later). I could say that I know everything there is about Deaf Culture, but I'm just the "TTY/TDD". No one uses TTY/TDD these days. They've moved on to text messages and AIM. So, should I say I know everything that's going on? No.
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Unread 06-27-2011, 09:18 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by VamPyroX View Post


It's usually best to keep an open mind and listen to what everyone has to say. It's easier to just listen to someone and then move on than it is to listen to someone and then kick them out of your life because you don't agree with what they say.

There will always be different advice from different people. One may be better than the other. One may never be the best. However, hearing 3 different things can sometimes help you look at those 3 things and come up with a 4th on your own.

Person A says, "1+5=6"
Person B says, "2+4=6"
Person C says, "3+3=6"

Does that mean there's only 3 options? No. By learning from those that other say, you've concluded that 6 can be added up in many ways.

So, you come up with "2+2+2=6" and "1+2+3=6"

Maybe the specialist didn't literally mean for you to study Deaf Culture in general, but to listen to your daughter's view of Deaf Culture so that you can understand how your daughter sees things.

I grew up mainstreamed in school. The definition of deaf culture during my time in school was different that the definition of deaf culture of those who are in school today (15 years later). I could say that I know everything there is about Deaf Culture, but I'm just the "TTY/TDD". No one uses TTY/TDD these days. They've moved on to text messages and AIM. So, should I say I know everything that's going on? No.
Exactly, each person is different so therefore each person's needs are different
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Unread 06-29-2011, 07:36 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Exactly, each person is different so therefore each person's needs are different
But there are still a limited number of ways in which to address those needs when making educational placement.
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