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Old 06-25-2008, 07:12 PM   #1 (permalink)
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how you would feel this if your child leave you for good..

If this child is an adult already, he/she have no value for family.. he/she dont want to see your family such as aunts, uncles, cousins, or you (the mom or dad or whoever you are important to that kid who is/was ur family)

Look at this poem..

*copy from one person*

Yes sometimes it is necessary to leave your family behind so you can grow as an individual here is a poem I found one day

Khalil Gibran once said :

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of

Life's longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you,

Yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love

But not your thoughts.

For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies

But not their souls,

For their souls dwell

In the house of tomorrow,

Which you cannot visit,

Not even in your dreams.
+++++++++++++

I have my reasons to leave my family for good..
They arent really support my beliefs or anything.. It's like I'm soo opposite of their ways..
goodbye, not seeing them for xmas, thanksgiving, easter, bdays, and else..
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Old 06-25-2008, 08:48 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Well, as a mother of two adult children, I would feel really bad if they completely left me and no longer wanted to see me for holidays or anything.
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Old 06-25-2008, 08:54 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bottesini View Post
Well, as a mother of two adult children, I would feel really bad if they completely left me and no longer wanted to see me for holidays or anything.
Shouldnt you be proud of them?

I guess no one agree on this..
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Old 06-25-2008, 08:59 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I have alot of disagree and have some horrible past with my families, but I still see my families and love them, they are the only people that I could depend on
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Old 06-25-2008, 09:06 PM   #5 (permalink)
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hmm for you ya.. but for me not really.. I dont even know who my aunts or uncles or anyone in my family.. cuz we dont talk.. they are seem like strangers to me.. so I dont see the point of me going to see them and do nothing all day.. I have other things to do..
and my parents.. I dont want to go personal details.. but i have my reasons.. it seems like for me it is better to leave
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Old 06-25-2008, 09:12 PM   #6 (permalink)
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hmm for you ya.. but for me not really.. I dont even know who my aunts or uncles or anyone in my family.. cuz we dont talk.. they are seem like strangers to me.. so I dont see the point of me going to see them and do nothing all day.. I have other things to do..
and my parents.. I dont want to go personal details.. but i have my reasons.. it seems like for me it is better to leave
Yeah I understand, my dad's side family are the same, I don't see my dad's side family that much too and does feel like they are stranger just like you, but my mom's side family are influenced by European's culture, that's why we stay together.
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Old 06-25-2008, 10:03 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I had to leave my family (my parents) because my dad and his wife were very abusive towards me and my sister. We can't take any more abuse from them. I left home when I was 13 years old and went into foster care.
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Old 06-25-2008, 10:09 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I had to leave my family (my parents) because my dad and his wife were very abusive towards me and my sister. We can't take any more abuse from them. I left home when I was 13 years old and went into foster care.
In case of abuse, it makes very good sense for your survival to leave forever.
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Old 06-25-2008, 10:10 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Old 06-26-2008, 12:20 AM   #10 (permalink)
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hmmm. That is very interesting, that you have to leave your family for good. I want my son to send me birthday cards, Christmas card and Mother's Day card, but he never send me any of those cards. I did send him all the birthdays, Christmas cards and sometimes Father's Day cards, but not to me. Yes, I would feel hurt if he did not consider thinking of me. As for my parents, I send them the greeting card for birthday, Christmas, Mother's Day and Father's Day, etc. I know I must have make them feel better knowing that I think about them. The only regret is I am not there when they passed away because I lived too far away, but there is nothing I could do if I did not know they have gone to the hospital and pass away. I was very disappoint with myself but I have to be here in Canada to get married and just settle down as a reason to be on First Nation reservation as an Elder. My parents and I had our differences when it come to my deafness and I was mad at them about mainstream school with no ASL language and no interpreter, not even a notetaker. They think I can lipread them very well and I would have no problem understanding them, but they are wrong about that. Oh, well, life is funny sometimes, eh?
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Old 06-26-2008, 02:42 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
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In case of abuse, it makes very good sense for your survival to leave forever.
Physical abuse - Yes, I can see why one need to leave permanently. What about emotional abuse??? I think that refusal to learn ASL (or PSE, MCE, etc) can be considered as emotional abuse.
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Old 06-26-2008, 08:26 AM   #12 (permalink)
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There are times when things aren't so right between my family and I, but I cannot see myself abandoned my family. For instance, my mother was never a mother, she would just crushed my heart every chance she got, but I still love her unconditionally. I don't have to be close to her, but I can be civil to her after all she's my mother, there's no other way I can put it.
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Old 06-26-2008, 09:47 AM   #13 (permalink)
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The Gibran poem is an excerpt from "The Prophet." He was not talking about leaving your family behind forever, but simply that parents must allow children to live their own lives. You cannot live your child's life for them.
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Old 06-26-2008, 09:52 AM   #14 (permalink)
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The Gibran poem is an excerpt from "The Prophet." He was not talking about leaving your family behind forever, but simply that parents must allow children to live their own lives. You cannot live your child's life for them.
In that case, my children do leave home and have their own homes and lifes now. And I am happy about that.
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Old 06-26-2008, 09:55 AM   #15 (permalink)
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In that case, my children do leave home and have their own homes and lifes now. And I am happy about that.
Absolutely. That is what we raise them to do, isn't it?
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Old 06-26-2008, 09:56 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Absolutely. That is what we raise them to do, isn't it?
Yes, exactly!
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Old 06-26-2008, 10:00 AM   #17 (permalink)
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well i can't wait to leave to stay away from my mother and her controllings i only wanted to stay away for while

i am getting tired of mother's controllings of my life that i can't deal with
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Old 06-26-2008, 10:41 PM   #18 (permalink)
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I left my mom's house when I was 19. I moved on my own apt. I was an immature and rookie to live apt and handle the bills. The reason why I moved out of my mom's. Because I didn't like my stepdad is a clutter! I always clean up the house all the times. He is keeping mess up. It made me mad. I did organize for my mom's kitchen. He isn't good at organize. I can't deal with him. I moved out for good. My stepdad and I used to not get along. I will never live with my mom's house again. I can come for visit or sleepover once day. I always keep in touch with my mom on vp a lot. I can't live with her because of my stepdad. He is so grumpy old man!


For my future kids until they are 18 over. We will teach them how to handle the bills when they move out on their owns. If they're mature enough to make a decide what they want to live with someone else. They will learn about out of the world. If they are in college and live in dorm. If they are afford to live in apt with roommate.

Other wise, My half brother left my mom when he finished with High School Diploma. He moved on his own at age 18. He never go to college. He got his own job and too much partyhead. He never send her for birthday card and Mother's Day. It hurt my mom felt a lot. They aren't getting along. That's so sad! I hope he will forgive to my mom what she done to him in past. It's his and my mom's between not me.
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Old 06-29-2008, 12:42 PM   #19 (permalink)
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I am lucky with two great families. Last night was so blast time with my in laws and my childrren with their new wife and soon to be wife had a great time. Families are very important to us, we stay in contact with them over years. We help each other when we are in trouble. I am sorry it did not work out for many others. For next month I already asked my boys to go to their cousin's wedding reception because they have to work during day, they will ot made to wedding but to receoption. Soon I will find time to go and visit my dying aunt even thou I do not see her much over years. Busy life for everyone.
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Old 07-06-2008, 10:44 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I want my daughters to grow up to be healthy adults who can lead their own lives knowing I would always support them through life's ups and downs. If they left home because they are angry and never want to see me again - I would be crushed. I want a relationship with them for as long as we live. They will always be my babies.
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Old 07-06-2008, 05:09 PM   #21 (permalink)
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I moved out at a late age but still keeping contact with my family except for my sister. So One day my son will move out and I told him that he had better come see me often and I would take him out for a dinner or make a dinner for him. He knows there is love in my house for him and he would want that and he can come by and get the love from me. I wouldnt mind if he move out but as long as he keep in touch with me then that would be fine with me.

My family are a close knit family.
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