Ashli

Well I'm completely overwhelmed. My son, 8 weeks old has moderate/severe loss (one ear each) and I know that our state's Early intervention program will be connecting with us; we've been referred by the children's hospital that conducted his BAER. And we are seeing an Ent next week.
But for weeks since we've known he likely had a loss (now confirmed) I've been online reading and reading and Im honestly totally overwhelmed by all the sites and organizations and resources and opinions. All i want now is to figure out.what i could be doing for his best interests right now as a parent wanting to ensure we give him the best shot at communication and learning, since these early months are so critical. Im just overwhelmed so that i don't even know where to look first. Anyone been through this? I am hearing and so is my husband and older daughter (age 3.5)

Deafness

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GrendelQ

We found some of the best resources in the following organizations:

• the Deaf and HOH Department at Children's Hospital Boston (they provided audiology staff, ENTs, and psych staff who are experts in educating deaf children and opening up avenues for communication)
• Early intervention: provided an ASL-fluent SLP right off the bat who not only started my daughter off with basic ASL and language development but also provided us with contacts at local schools for the deaf and dhh programs; provided for services at the school we selected for ASL immersion
• The state commission for DHH provided us with a deaf mentor, family sign instruction in our house, and an amazingly comprehensive binder of resources available from educational options to technology in the home
• A bi-bi school for the deaf where we conducted our early intervention services (ASL-based group and 1 on 1, 3X weekly ) and where we were exposed for the first time to deaf adults using fluent sign language, deaf peers for my daughter -- some using various technologies to access sound, some not, and other parents of deaf children with a depth and breadth of direct experience worth so much -- an amazing program that my daughter thoroughly enjoyed

Looks like you have already tapped most of these in your local area. There are so many great paths you can take. For us, it's been a wonderful adventure, and my daughter is currently thriving as a bi-modally bilingual 6 year old. Best of luck to you in your adventure!

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caz12

take deep breath and relax as said you tapping into most things dont get so overwhelmed or you do yourself no good.....ask ent department what your next step should be....it may seem very daunting at the moment but it will level out and your baby will progress fine...ASL as soon as you can

bbaseballboy123

I, for one completely recommend teaching the baby ASL as soon as possible even if you are going down the oral path. I was raised with the oral method (proud to be raised oral), but I am learning ASL now and I wished I had learned it as a kid.

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Tikra

yeah i do agree with bbaseballboy i was also raised with oral method but also taught english sign language before asl were fully developed. I am not very good with asl sign language currently and still using old english sign language. Again i dont socialize very much with deaf people since i graduated from high school. I do think it the best to teach your child asl very early but also oral as well cuz it will help them LOT as they grow up.

i also think it best for the child to grow up socializing around with deaf children but also with hearing children. I kinda of regretting not socialize lot out there after graduated high school cuz of the way my parents raised me. I dont even go out much during school years and stay home lot watch tv visit families but was mostly quiet during family visits all the time.

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deafdyke

One of the advantages of doing both, is that Ashli will most likely be able to connect with speech therapists who are very familiar with how to work with dhh kids. Oral skills (unless there's something like apraxia or cleft palate or something like that) are usually present in audilogically hoh kids. They may have spoken language delays....I think even with EI there are still HOH kids with spoken language (not speech meaning enucication and boring shit like that) But most of the time, they get hooked up with general speech therapists, instead of specialized ones for the dhh. (ie the mentality is that " Oh they're not really deaf or really all that affected speech wise so, all they need is general speech therapy)

Ashli

I'd love for him to be bilingual. How is he going to learn ASL if it isn't used at home or daycare? Even if we as a family take classes...
I just worry we're losing time. He's 8 weeks already and I am afraid he's getting no language from me while I am on maternity leave with him. Although we should be connecting with early intervention soon after our next audiology appt on Thursday.
I am trying to teach myself some signs but it is slow going and very limited.
Appreciating all your responses!

Reba

I don't know how it is in your state but in my state the daycares are supposed to provide workers who can sign with the little ones.

You might be interested in this:

http://www.childcarelaw.org/files/DO...Agreements.pdf

These are all daycare ADA cases. They aren't all about deaf kids but the legal principle is the same.

Child Care Law Center - Resources - Publications (by issue)

Child Care Law Center - Issues - Children with Disabilities

Reba

This is the official ADA site from the Justice Department. It has the faq's for daycare questions.

Commonly Asked Questions About Child Care and the ADA

CSign

Since he's only 8 weeks old, you don't need to worry about not having a ton of vocabulary right now. Start with the basics and work your way up. At this age milk, mom, dad, and sister are a good place to start As your vocabulary increases, start adding more signs. Just talk to him like you did with your daughter, but use the sign as well whenever possible. EI will set up home visits with your daughter and family, and they can teach you more during the visits.

You can also have it written in his Individualized Family Service Plan (IFSP) that they will provide you guys with sign language classes. I'd encourage you to get in the habit of signing with your daughter as well. That will add a few more words to your list . It will be important that not only she learns how to sign, but that as your son gets older he is on an environment where he has access to all communication- not just communication directed at him. You may have heard of the Signing Time series which plays on PBS and is also available for purchase. That would be good for your daughter to watch now, and you guys as well as you'll have an opportunity to pick up more signs.

Try not to stress about your son. Just love him, talk to him, sign with him, and treat him like you would any other child. He is still very young- he will get the language so long as you guys stay committed to learning how to sign.

CSign

One thing I forgot: I didn't get a chance to read Reba's links, but I'd encourage you to ask around to see if there are any day care's around that have had deaf children before, and any sign experience. If that doesn't work, you can also have it written into his IFSP that the county office (likely the Itinerant Teacher of the Deaf) go in and teach the providers some basic signs, and also provide them with information about deaf children and how to effectively communicate with them.

deafdyke

And yes, he's still very young. He's only eight weeks old........Antother suggestion might be to see if there are any CODAs or 'terps around that could serve as sign mentors....look into resources in your area....you might be really surprised actually as what you find. There's also the possibilty of maybe moving.....there are some very Deaf towns around with tons of amazing resources!

breelligerent

I don't have experience with raising a deaf child, but I just want to tell you that everything will be okay. Don't be afraid, don't freak out. You can handle this! Your family will adapt and your son will have language (hopefully two!).

Not panicking is the most important thing. When you panic it's easy to be swept up with going down a path that, while it seems to be the best thing at the time, can be more harmful in the end. You're already doing the best thing for your son: you're contacting professionals and thinking about his future. Keep being a great mom and you'll be okay.

Ejet

No advice, I just wanted to send you hugs. It can be so scary and overwhelming, but you are not alone. ((Hugs))

warpedpink

American Sign Language. Definitely... PLEASE do not listen to any "professionals" that are against this.

This picture has been trending on various social medias. I hope it gives you a chuckle.

529506_3846247727568_291215522_n by warpedpink, on Flickr

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CSign

LOL. That is great

Ashli

That's great
Ok so ASL as a first language? Or can we successfully work on oral English and at the same time ASL? No one in the family knows any ASL. So i can't teach what i don't know. I am not sure what options early intervention will present us with on Monday.
I know it's easy to be cynical and just think the professionals are giving us poor advice or not out for our best interests. But at the same time they are the professionals, i will let them do their job while keeping myself educated.

CSign

There is no reason that your child cannot become proficient/fluent in ASL and English. There are different approaches you can take. I used Total
Communication (TC) with Signing Exact English (SEE) and transitioned to ASL when he got a bit older. Many of the signs in SEE are the same as in ASL so when they are babies it doesnt differ too much since they are learning the basics. That was beneficial for my son to have complete access to language, and to internalize the intricacies of English. TC gave him the opportunity to develop oral skills (which isn't a possibility for everyone, but given your son's degree of loss he'd probably be able to), as well as an understanding of the spoken language surrounding him. He has had no problem transitioning to ASL. Another approach is the Bilingual-Bicultural philosophy (Bi-Bi) that uses both ASL and teaches English, but the approach to teaching and learning English is different. We have a poster whose child is in a Bi-Bi program who could answer any questions you have about it. There is no one right way to achieve an end. You have to make the determination what is appropriate for your child and family. Search the forum a bit, and you'll get an idea.

This is another good site to look through that discusses communication options among other things:

Hands & Voices :: Articles

GrendelQ

Have you located the nearest school for the deaf? They may be able to point you to local resources for ASL instruction for you, for your child, ASL-based day care (if it exists locally), ASL-based playgroups that would include your daughter as well as your son, ASL-fluent SLPs and early intervention alternatives.

Have you contacted your state's DHH commission to find out how to begin Family Sign and learn about state resources? Do they have a parent coordinator or liaison who can outline the options for resources in terms of language, school placement, technology (hearing and home)?

It's difficult to point you to resources without knowing the specifics of what's available where you are located. If you were in MA I'd give you some contacts and phone numbers, and I'd bet there are people on this board who could do the same for AZ.

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warpedpink

Both at the same time is fine, HOWEVER, many of us have experienced something frustrating and horrible. That something is hearing people (and Deaf too) often become sort of lazy and spoken English will dominate over ASL. Just because it's easier, and that's totally understandable, but it will suck for your kid.

Also, please check out aslpro.com. It's a great website with almost every word in sign on video.

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Tousi

And keep in mind that your child is and will always be a visual learner....

Sarfarigirl2011

which I am of course LOL

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deafdyke

The debate seems to be over which language should be a dhh kid's first language. The key for EI, really should be giving a kid both languages.....

deafdyke

There used to be a parent of a deaf teen from Arizona who posted here...... I can't remmeber his name, but he was a fount of info and support. . Wish he still posted here.

Reba

Both languages, yes. ASL and English are both languages. SEE is not a language.

GrendelQ

Really good point Csign -- my daughter started picking up SEE signs this past year and when I asked her teachers (in a very bi-bi, ASL-first academic environment) about this, they explained that many of their deaf teachers actually use quite a bit of Signing Exact English when teaching children to read, as a visual access to the English language. So my daughter was picking up the signs from other children in classes where these signs are more commonly in use and from encounters with those teachers using SEE signs to clarify and to be more specific regarding English reading content with students without auditory access.

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darkbunny101

One of the questions that you have to ask yourself is; What do I want for my son?

Since you want him to have the ability to communicate with others, get him early speech intervention. The earlier you get speech therapy for your son the less trouble he will face when he gets older.

Another aspect to consider is; is he going to learn ASL, speech, or both. If you wish for him to learn both and wish for him to be successful in both aspects I would recommend that you teach him some speech first and ASL later because I had a friend when I was younger and she learned ASL first then got implanted and struggled learning how to talk.

If you are considering getting him assistive technology like an implant, get him used to hearing new sounds now! Just get him a hearing aid or something to get him accustomed to sounds. Play games like, did you hear that? So he can learn how to pick up and process sounds around him more efficiently with his implant.

Don’t be scared to research all of the options out there for your son.

Best of luck.

Reba

If a child first learns ASL, he will at least have a language and be able to communicate his needs to others.

For a deaf child, ASL is his language; it's visual and totally independent of any hearing ability; it's his norm, and it shouldn't be withheld from him.

Teaching a child ASL right from the beginning is the most beneficial way to go because communication between parents and child can begin right away. The hearing parents don't need to be fluent signers at the beginning, and no one is saying that they have go voice off all the time. Hearing parents don't need an extensive sign vocabulary to start with.

Of all the hearing parents of deaf children that I've met, I haven't heard any of them express regret over learning to sign with their children. I have heard regret from parents who did NOT learn how to sign with their children. They would tell me, "When our child was young, the 'experts' told us not to sign with him. Now I realize how much we missed out on."

deafdyke

AMEN Reba. And in addition he has a moderately severe loss. Chances are good that he will develop speech skills without super intense instruction (the way deafer kids might) You don't generally need to worry about speech skills with audilogically HOH kids......but far too often we don't get ASL.

Jolie77

Everyone's got excellent advices. I couldn't agree any more with them on the ASL approach.

If you want to have a real-life learning approach, I would encourage you to meet other Deaf Adults with diverse language methodology background whether it's oral, ASL, Signed Exact English, etc just to give yourself a perspective from individuals within the Deaf Community and as well as Deaf Community at Large. Don't be afraid to ask them how they approached their learning style, what works for them, what doesn't work for them and stuff like that.

Good Luck!

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