Deaf or HoH?

mbrek

mbrek

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What is the point where you decide you are not just hard of hearing, but deaf?
 
Deaf people tell me that I am hoh but hearing people tell me that I am deaf.

I just say that "I am Shelly, a person, who cant understand s*** you are saying." (to hearing/deaf people)

I just say to Deaf people, "I am Shelly who can understand s**** you say."
 
I used to think I was hoh because I do use speech. Then I was lectured by a Deaf ASL teacher that I am Deaf, Deaf, Deaf... Leave hoh behind.

So now I am d/Deaf.

But more importantly, I am popular! :P
 
Ahhh...the Merry-Go-Round (at least for me)....I'm totally, absolutely Deaf, (since 14 years of age).....but I'm oral...and understand about 80% (sometimes more) of what is being "said" by Hearies, and about 90% of ASL by deafies.....all depends on how fast they sign and if they move their lips while signing....I'm not HOH (hard of hearing)...never worn a HA or a CI....

Never became fluent in ASL, and I can master/speak a lot of words orally moreso than signing them....
 
Growing up, I was told all along I was hoh. It wasn't until recently that I could have considered myself to be deaf from early on, but it was not something my family was ever told. We had to deaf community around. I grew up totally oral and learned to read lips. I am now, like RR, absolutely and totally deaf. Been so for 5 1/2 years now. I am still oral, but I am going more and more voice off. I am learning ASL and using it more and more. I have identified myself as deaf now for 5 years and was recently told that I am also considered Deaf.
 
I am dadblamed proud to be DEEF, so said the old cowboy at the wedding this weekend.

I concur.
 
The reason I ask, I introduced myself at a deaf night out, and told him I was HoH. He asked Hoh, or deaf? I reaffirmed HoH, looking a bit puzzled. I did just tell him HoH...

I don't have any problems with being deaf, if I ever get that far. But I can still "pass myself off" as a hearie. I go without my HAs most of the time, except in social situations. I don't wear them at home much - and I do most errands without them as well (although it may get tricky if I really need to talk to someone).

I just wasn't sure where the line in the sand is... because I know even some people who are deaf can hear some sounds. I always assumed deaf was absolutely no sound at all.
 
Good question... I'm still trying to figure this out for myself.

I bounce between thinking of myself as HOH and deaf. I've experimented with telling hearies I'm deaf or that I'm HOH. I seem to get a better reaction if I tell them I'm HOH. It seems that if I tell them I'm deaf, they don't talk with me. (This is not a scientific study, though.)

Sometimes at school when I'm walking in the hallway, some people will start saying something to me as we pass. So I tell them I'm hoh or deaf and to please repeat. I seem to get further with them if I say hoh, rather than deaf.

Maybe the fact that I am speaking throws them off. *shrugs*

As far as the deaf community goes, so far I have found acceptance, except that a couple people seemed embarrassed when I gave a waitress my order, verbally. Is it a social faux pas to use voice around other deaf people, somehow?

I know that I can't go without hearing aids.... I don't dare try to get by in the hearing world without my hearing aids. I wouldn't hear much at all.
 
Some Deaf people assume that I am hoh. No way in hell that I am hoh. I'm Deaf since birth and the percent in understandability of my speech is 25 % or less. I'm not even great enough at lipreading.
 
DeafBadger said:
Good question... I'm still trying to figure this out for myself.

I bounce between thinking of myself as HOH and deaf. I've experimented with telling hearies I'm deaf or that I'm HOH. I seem to get a better reaction if I tell them I'm HOH. It seems that if I tell them I'm deaf, they don't talk with me. (This is not a scientific study, though.)

Sometimes at school when I'm walking in the hallway, some people will start saying something to me as we pass. So I tell them I'm hoh or deaf and to please repeat. I seem to get further with them if I say hoh, rather than deaf.

Maybe the fact that I am speaking throws them off. *shrugs*

As far as the deaf community goes, so far I have found acceptance, except that a couple people seemed embarrassed when I gave a waitress my order, verbally. Is it a social faux pas to use voice around other deaf people, somehow?

I know that I can't go without hearing aids.... I don't dare try to get by in the hearing world without my hearing aids. I wouldn't hear much at all.
Click to expand...

I get embarrassed sometimes when a hearie friend(s) order foods to the waitress/waiter for me instead I can do the order on my own without any hearie's help. >=[
 
I tell hearing people that I am hard of hearing. Reason being... it gets way too complicated with them if I say I am deaf.

If I tell a hearing person I am deaf. They will be like.. but you can talk, you can hear... blah blah. It is just easier to tell them I am hard of hearing.


To my Deaf friends. They know I am Deaf.
 
It should not really matter whether a person is deaf or HOH. There can be people that are HOH and fluent in ASL. There can be people who are deaf that cannot sign fluently.
 
I use to accept one of my audiologist's definition:

"As long as you can be helped by hearing aids you are hard of hearing."

But more and more, I don't think that is a good definition.

I can't hear most people in a noisy room, in fact I need to lipread most people even in a quiet room. I can't easily be part of a hearing group conversation in most places -- a party, bar, outdoors on the street.

Because of that, it makes sense to say I'm deaf -- right?

On the other hand, I can basically hear on many phones as long as I'm wearing a hearing aid with a telecoil and especially if the phone has volume control. (The only thing I really have trouble with is getting someone's last name or unusual first name if I don't know them. )

That's a big deal so because of that it makes sense to say I'm hard of hearing -- right?

:confused:

These days I say neither. I call myself part-deaf.
 
I consider myself deaf, although.. I am very oral and most hearing people do not know I have hearing issues If I am not wearing a hearing aids.

If someone askes, I do tell them I am hard of hearing, because like others it is just easier for me to explain.....instead of....but you talk just normal....and you don't sign when you talk... Or...blah blah...

My family and close friends know I am Deaf and that is all that matters right?
 
katz4life said:
I get embarrassed sometimes when a hearie friend(s) order foods to the waitress/waiter for me instead I can do the order on my own without any hearie's help. >=[
Click to expand...

Yeah, that's really not right.

I wasn't verbally ordering for anyone else though, just for myself. But it seemed that a couple of deaf people I was with looked embarrassed that I did that.

I am not sure if it is socially acceptable to do that in the company of other deaf folks?

Since I am new to the deaf community, I have no idea and don't want to do anything that is considered rude.
 
for quite a while, I tried to convince myself that I could fit into the hearing world just fine... but... I can't... and I have known that for years now. I know that I am deaf... and getting Deafer by the day... and that no longer bothers me... I'm learning to embrase it... and it has made all the difference. I am a happy person now... I am excited to be me now! I am using my natural language (even though it wasn't my first language) it is my natural language, and It is an amazing thing!
 
katz4life said:
I get embarrassed sometimes when a hearie friend(s) order foods to the waitress/waiter for me instead I can do the order on my own without any hearie's help. >=[
Click to expand...


To be honest, my girlfriend is hearing and she is always happy to help interpret for me. I really don't mind. I have enough self esteem to know that if I am on my own, I would order myself. It's just easier if my girlfriend interprets.

It would depend on each individual, I would guess. I don't feel offended when my girlfriend helps out. I had a deaf friend who went on date with hearing women and he would insist that he order himself!! He does not want any help!!
 
mbrek said:
The reason I ask, I introduced myself at a deaf night out, and told him I was HoH. He asked Hoh, or deaf? I reaffirmed HoH, looking a bit puzzled. I did just tell him HoH...

I don't have any problems with being deaf, if I ever get that far. But I can still "pass myself off" as a hearie. I go without my HAs most of the time, except in social situations. I don't wear them at home much - and I do most errands without them as well (although it may get tricky if I really need to talk to someone).

I just wasn't sure where the line in the sand is... because I know even some people who are deaf can hear some sounds. I always assumed deaf was absolutely no sound at all.
Click to expand...

I was told by a doctor years ago that deaf meant a person can't hear anything. And that I was HOH and not a good candidate to have surgery
to hear better. When people tell me I can hear good, I tell them "No my HA is doing the hearing for me that I can hear shit without it!! " They looked shocked! I get tried of being told I can hear good , if that was true I would not be wearing a piece of purple plastic behind my ear. I feel like the
elephant in the room with 3 blind men when it come to my hearing.
 
Someone here say only like 1% deaf people hear absolute nothing (I feel special! Lol)
 
My question is do I even have the right to say I'm deaf (little d) due to my SSD and HOH in my functioning ear? For years I have been saying d/hh, but with that I find I feel like I'm stuck somewhere between two worlds. I'm not sure if I fit appropriately in either. I feel like I don't function completely like a hearie, but I also don't function completely like a deafie either.

What do you think?
 
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