Cheetah

Great idea! I once did an introduction lecture with a radio blasting (actually several radios blasting). At the end of the into I turned them all off and ask the audience how much they understood. I then continued with my lecture. It worked great! Funny how I never thought to use your method.

Deafness

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StevieMont927

I noticed the thing with the headphones too. I was listening to something in my cafeteria, and couldn't hear either of my friends, or any other conversation. It was interesting. I figured out that I'm better at reading lips than I thought I was, too.

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deafskeptic

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Dixie

When I say "What?" as in "What did you say?" and hearies respond back sarcastically "What?" and laugh like we're stupid monkeys or something.

Maybe I should just do an over exaggerated sign for "What?" to them.

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charlene

Oh where do I begin? I'm new here and may get around to the introduction forum, but this thread got my attention first.

When I explain myself the most common response is the joke, "What?" accompanied by laughter.

Doing all the work listening to a person relate a long drawn out joke, only to have the punch line whispered or understated for emphasis. Grrrr.

Explaining myself to every living human being I have contact with. Receiving an absolutely shocked look and refusal to communicate further as if I had insulted them irreparably.

People who say that it is unfair for me to "inflict" myself on the hearing world without presenting the alternative as to where I am supposed to go crawl away and die.

Having high grades in school met with deliberate sabotage and exclusion from study groups.

Working in health care, if I dare to ask a physician to repeat something I did not hear, getting either yelled at for daring "to question" the doctor or subsequently being asked for the "real" person in authority, which unfortunately is still me.

Doing everything in my power to help people, but having them still perceive something isn't quite normal with me, resulting in complaints to the company and loss of jobs for me--even though I go above and beyond requirements and have a superior service record on objective evaluations.

Having had to use a cane for awhile due to a broken knee, and having the general public make way, give concerned attention and patience for the visible need of accommodation--what a change from getting kicked in the teeth for "acting stupid" because deafness is invisible therefore "ok" to persecute at every communication juncture.

People who refuse to work for or under a hard of hearing person. And all the advice the hearies give you about how you just aren't stepping up to the management task due to some incomprehensible lack of character that is indefinable and therefore uncorrectable.

Having school lighting motion sonic detectors turn off my hearing aids and having the hearing aid manufacturer refuse to acknowledge the problem because "our clientele is older and they don't try to go to school."

Finding a balance of emphasizing the need for accommodation without presenting yourself as a danger to the public if you occupy a critical profession.

People, especially those in power, who are so insecure that they are compelled to tease or torture me just to make themselves feel better about themselves.

When working intensive retail and taking phones, communication takes a great deal of concentration and takes a heavy toll on health and peace of mind. When I do get a lunch break, if I get a lunch break, having the inability to get away from people who want to engage me in continued conversation so I cannot concentrate on my meal or get a mental break from work strain. Having this be considered unfriendly and rude.

I could go on and on, but this is it for now. Thanks for the forum to vent.

Speedy Hawk

Yeah I had same thing. I think it might be hearies think "What" is rude or something. They prefer "Excuse me, can you repeat that please" something like that.

For me it very hard to break "What" habit cos in BSL just sign "What?". I even got hoodie from my friend 'Mr Men and Miss' got 'What?' on it. Lol suits me perfectly!

chocoholic

I only meant to lurk on this thread because it's funny how ridiculous some people are(people in the stories not people posting*) and like steve said you can learn what you shouldn't do. but this story was just toooooo great not to respond!!!!!!! EPIC WIN. YOU ARE AWESOME. ok i'll get out of the way now.

sallylou

Wirelessly posted (droid)

A women who didn't know I know asl told me that she has a secret sign with her kid that means I love you. I asked her if she knew what it meant in asl. She didn't. I told her that she's signing "huh?" She wasn't amused but I thought it was funny. I can imagine deaf people wondering why they are saying huh? to each other. Some hearies are just no fun. lol

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Sunshine

My sister sometimes think texting too slow, so she phone talk my roommate. Point is roommate will sign me what Season say her. 99 out of 100 times, this begin, then two minutes later they just talking. Nobody signing what going on. Rude.

AlleyCat

Totally know what you mean, Sunny !!

Sunshine

So annoying! Season not even friends Kara (roommate). Just rude.

DeafRaptor

All I can say is (exasperated sigh/annoyed sound here).

mbrek

Sunny, you should refuse to communicate with your sister this way. Tell your roommate to quit taking her calls and tell your sister to stop being rude and, slow or not, text YOU directly.

If you want to have fun with this you could have your roommate sign your sisters messages "wrong" a few times. Your sister will get frustrated and hopefully do the job herself.

DeafRaptor

I think it's fine if some people want to use the "excuse me" line. I do it too every once in a long while and I am trying to break THAT habit. I hate having to excuse myself "excuse me...", apologize "sorry, but...", or ask for a favor "please..." every time I miss something (which can be every third word in some cases or every word in worst cases).

Especially if they are ignoring the tips I provided them (don't cover your mouth, don't look away, try to speak clearly at a moderate volume, etc) to make the communication easier/especially when almost everyone makes me do all the work to stay a part of the conversation (my family and extended relatives are no exception)/and especially since I am not intentionally trying to ignore them/selectively hear/etc.

It makes me feel inferior/like a second class citizen (that's how they make me feel). As if I have to be careful or otherwise I would be "imposing" (that's how they act) on those supposedly superior people in order for me to stay included in the conversation. I have not been graced or blest with considerate people and I have rarely met anyone that is considerate in my 28 years on this earth. It gets exhausting being the person who is accommodating everyone else.

DeafCaroline

I used to say "excuse me" and "pardon me" or "sorry?" until I got fed up with excusing or apologizing or asking pardon for my deafness.

My sister attempted to correct me once when I said "what?" to her and I bristled and asked her why should I apologize or excuse myself as if I did something wrong when I'm working very hard to understand them and communicate with them on their terms and they don't put forth even a fraction of the same effort to communicate with me.

Secretblend

How did she respond to that?

shel90

I tell hearing people when I dont understand them "I am lost...u are NOT meeting my communication NEEDS! "


JK...


I dont apologize anymore. In those days when I used to apologize, I would always feel bad about myself like I did something bad. No more...it is all about empowering myself.

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DeafCaroline

"I never thought of it that way before. You're right. I'm sorry."

deafskeptic

When I was in the hospital, my CI was out out of easy reach so when people came in, I couldn't hear their voices.

I got so sick of guessing what they were saying to me that I said to one lady after making a request to write it down please and she kept moving her mouth at me, "If you can not write iit down, please leave."

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Speedy Hawk

I don't like to use excuse me and I can't say word "excuse" anyway so that not option for me. I defo don't want to say sorry. What else is there apart from "What?", that why I use that word more than any other word with hearies. They do sometimes feel I am being rude when I am not.

Secretblend

I have trouble with "excuse" also so I say "pardon me" instead.

DeafRaptor

Nice summary of what I meant to say. See, I talk too much.

LDNanna

I was shopping this weekend and the manager of the store was out front selling baked things for a benefit. She waved me to her and tried to explain what her bake benefit was for (I think?). I pointed to both ears and should my head while smiling. She met me full face to face and carefully mouthed that she too was deaf, that she was deaf in her left ear. I had a bit of hope.... (crash).... she then said "No worries, one day you will be healed and perfect again".... ech.
She told me that because of her deafness that she lost her husband - divorced. I was annoyed. (Imagine that! ha!) I told her that if she was fully deaf then he wouldn't have gotten on her nerves so badly. Dang I am evil.

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DeafRaptor

First off, and welcome to AllDeaf. The following was my reaction to the hearing people in your post: and the following was how I calmed down: (on Xbox 360 ). Sorry to hear that you have had to deal with that. I have had my share of annoying ignorant hearing people, especially when it comes to my hearing/mobility service dog, but I don't think I've seen anything as discriminatory and hateful as some of the people you seem to deal with day in/day out. I could probably go into great detail on each of your stories, but I'd probably become again.

BTW, those lighting motion sonic detectors are in work environments too, so it seems like the manufacturers only care about the elderly who are not in school and are retired.

Hope to see more posts from you.

stormpraiser91

true-business!

SilentRider

One thing that annoys me is... When I try to communicate they feel its ok to just ignore me and walk away.. but if I do it I'm considered rude.. oh wait I forgot we deafies don't have anything important to say.

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯

SilentRider

I find it annoying when trying to communicate with someone and they just ignore and walk away.. but if i did that, I'd be considered rude or an a-hole.. oh wait iforgot we deafies never have anything important to say...

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯

KristinaB

I am running into a situation as is my son. Hubby is the main one to do this. Hubby will ask a question for information, and when we are in the middle of answering, he will leave the room. He'll come back 30 minutes or so later and ask the question again. Son will try to answer it again, but I will have already written down the answer. Hubby's been doing this for years and I haven't been able to break this habit. His parents always did it as well.

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deafskeptic

That one pisses me off big time.

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Left ear implanted with Med-El on April 24 2007.
Activated on May 9th.
Upgraded to Opus 2 9/10/2010
Think Pink.
FREE JILLIO!

Journey

I understand this thread is for deafies' stories, not hearies but I confess this story is about a stupid annoying hearie .. me.

Quite a few years ago, a deaf friend of mine invited me to a Christmas party at her house. It would be all deafies. I only knew very basic signs and fingerspelled slower than a turtle but the party sounded like fun so I went. I met many new people and they were all very welcoming and patient with me and my poor ASL. The night went on and after about 3 hours trying my best to understand and be understood by this large deaf group, my brain started to run out of energy. My signing got worse, my fingerspelling was a mess and the deafies hands seemed to go faster and faster. One young man came up to me and signed, "This year good for S-A-T-A-N you?".
Me: "Sorry missed that, fingerspell again please."
Him <slower>: "S-A-T-A-N"

Well now I am thinking, is he asking me about Satan because I have red hair? Why is he talking about Satan?? So I look at him all confused again.

Him <signing even slower>: "This year good for S-A-T-A-N you?"
Me: "Sorry, not understand"
By this time, he is fed up with trying to communicate with the stupid hearie woman and walks off. (I couldn't blame him, my brain was not working anymore and even I had lost patience with myself haha)

A little later I happen to see this same guy asking another one of his friends, "This year good for S-A-N-T-A you?"
Yup, Duh me! He wasn't spelling Satan, he was spelling Santa all that time. I was so tired from trying to understand all the ASL around me that I kept mixing up the letters in my own head!

Hearies that can't read fingerspelling properly are annoying! lol