Something I'm thinking about.... - Page 2

**Bottesini** · 01-15-2011, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

Good picture, Botti. I get the funeral face a lot because I'm going deaf. The implication is that I'm losing my status as a "normal' person and must be seriously grieving now.

Glad to be of service!

jillio · 01-15-2011, 10:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bottesini

Please refer to above illustration.

Saw it after I posted.

**Bottesini** · 01-15-2011, 10:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jillio

Saw it after I posted.

I think in pictures.

rebeccalj · 01-15-2011, 10:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jillio

That "oh, I am so sorry" face that so many people give a person who says, "I am deaf." Like you have just lost the most cherished person in your life.

What? I get it but I don't get it. Why do people make that expression for just not being able to hear properly?

rebeccalj · 01-15-2011, 10:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jillio

Most of society refers to hearing children as "normal" when talking about a deaf child. Absurd. But your mother was not alone, unfortunately. Does wonders for a child's self concept. NOT

Yes, you are right. I'm still trying to process that whole blueprint, even as adult. While therapy helped, a few years back, it doesn't totally go away.

Still, I like the poster who said, "Normal is just a setting on your washer."

Perfect and an answer I will give the next time someone says that I am not normal because I don't hear right.

rebeccalj · 01-15-2011, 10:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bottesini

Please refer to above illustration.

That was perfect image for the term.

**Bottesini** · 01-15-2011, 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rebeccalj

That was perfect image for the term.

Thank you.

rebeccalj · 01-15-2011, 11:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

Good picture, Botti. I get the funeral face a lot because I'm going deaf. The implication is that I'm losing my status as a "normal' person and must be seriously grieving now.

Yep, losing status.

Isn't that crazy? How can we be seen as less simply because we don't hear right. I will never, ever get that!

I have my own website and I can tell you that they are very, very thankful that I don't hear right. That I read body language. They have learned lots. It makes me feel like they lose status because they hear. They miss *SO* much that we don't.

rebeccalj · 01-15-2011, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bottesini

I think in pictures.

Me too.

Bebonang · 01-15-2011, 11:20 PM

The one thing I just could not comprehend is that hearing parents, even hearing grandparents want to have a "normal" children and try to pressure them into the hearing world with CI or oral-only program in the mainstream schools. That is why they are grieving so much over this hoopla "disability" which we are not except that we can not hear. Our brain is one hundred good and very intelligent. We don't like to be pressure every time the hearing family members like Mom and Dad try to get us "fix". Beside it is the same old record player for many, many years every time the hearing people think that the hearing doctor can "fix" them with the new devices like hearing aids and now CIs and what next after this? It is like playing the viola or violin over and over again. Can we just say enough is enough? Geeze.

rebeccalj · 01-15-2011, 11:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bebonang

The one thing I just could not comprehend is that hearing parents, even hearing grandparents want to have a "normal" children and try to pressure them into the hearing world with CI or oral-only program in the mainstream schools. That is why they are grieving so much over this hoopla "disability" which we are not except that we can not hear. Our brain is one hundred good and very intelligent. We don't like to be pressure every time the hearing family members like Mom and Dad try to get us "fix". Beside it is the same old record player for many, many years every time the hearing people think that the hearing doctor can "fix" them with the new devices like hearing aids and now CIs and what next after this? It is like playing the viola or violin over and over again. Can we just say enough is enough? Geeze.

Why do we need fixing? This is what frustrates me *SO* much! I am *NOT* imperfect. Or abnormal. I see the world in an unique way. I view it in pictures. I am visual, not verbal. In doing so I see so many things that hearies do not nor will they ever. Oh, this make me mad.

Pressure into hearing world because easier for them. NOT us!

My parents put me in hearing school. No discussion on what would be good for me. Throw me to wolves. Thanks Mum and Dad.

Thank god they do not subject me to surgery to fix what will never *be* fixed and put foreign object in my skull. Thank god! At least they only stole my first language from me when they took sign away from me.

Force me to speak English even though I don't understand language but learn because smart.

Of 14 children in my family, 12 now living, I am only deafie. I am also the only child with Bachelors and Masters Degree. Only child. Yeah, not normal.

If I speak with co-workers I use perfect English but it is hard. It takes time. But I do it. When I give seminars I speak perfect English. I do it. It's hard and it takes time but I do it.

Conforming to English is *SO* incredibly challenging but I do it because I am single Mum and need to support children.

You are beautiful and smart for just the person you are. I read many, many of your posts and you are *SO* wise and kind.

dogmom · 01-16-2011, 07:27 AM

I also think in pictures.

Botti, yup that totally fits the term

The real sad thing is that it actually happens-

Bebonang I liked what you wrote too, about family members trying to pressure someone to be something they're not. It seems like when there's expectations and un-acknowledged preconceptions like that, that is THEIR problem - but then they can make he problem as being deaf, which it never was.

Rebecca - certainly you are NOT imperfect! I think you are beautiful and smart just like Bebonang, too. No one on here is imperfect -but other people make that up!

BecLak · 01-17-2011, 06:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafdyke

Actually, did you know that Disabilty Rights people argue the same thing.....that it's not nesacrily their disabilty or condition that causes the problem...rather it's people's attitudes and man made barriers?

That is so true, deafdyke. + 1.

01-15-2011, 11:20 PM	#40 (permalink)
Bebonang Registered User Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Manitoulin Island on Lake Huron in Canada Posts: 7,009	The one thing I just could not comprehend is that hearing parents, even hearing grandparents want to have a "normal" children and try to pressure them into the hearing world with CI or oral-only program in the mainstream schools. That is why they are grieving so much over this hoopla "disability" which we are not except that we can not hear. Our brain is one hundred good and very intelligent. We don't like to be pressure every time the hearing family members like Mom and Dad try to get us "fix". Beside it is the same old record player for many, many years every time the hearing people think that the hearing doctor can "fix" them with the new devices like hearing aids and now CIs and what next after this? It is like playing the viola or violin over and over again. Can we just say enough is enough? Geeze. __________________ I HAVE BEEN DEAF SINCE BIRTH, AND IT IS STILL AWESOME TO BE . (thumb up) (very happy)

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01-16-2011, 07:27 AM	#42 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,472	I also think in pictures. Botti, yup that totally fits the term The real sad thing is that it actually happens- Bebonang I liked what you wrote too, about family members trying to pressure someone to be something they're not. It seems like when there's expectations and un-acknowledged preconceptions like that, that is THEIR problem - but then they can make he problem as being deaf, which it never was. Rebecca - certainly you are NOT imperfect! I think you are beautiful and smart just like Bebonang, too. No one on here is imperfect -but other people make that up!