Babyblue

I have always been told that first impression is truly important.

What is the first impression you get when a person "suddenly" finds out that you are deaf?

Me? I get various response from various people.

Many are like "Oh?" and get the Deer stuck in the headlight look. ( a long pause) Then start talking again.

Some are light, Oh cool!

I have some literally shut down and walk away.

Deafness

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rockin'robin

Ur right, first impressions are important!...I've always gave a "firm" handshake" and look directly into that person's eyes and said "How do you do"?

I believe making the "first gesture" is important when being introduced.....rather than stand back and wait for the introduction to become awkward (as some hearies do that)....being self-confident is important also...don't be "meek"!....Most all people feel a little "uncomfortable" upon meeting someone new, or even meeting a deaf person for the first time....

Babyblue

What happens when a hearing person realizes you are deaf. Have you ever had any clam up?

rockin'robin

Yes, I have....even one guy wrote on some paper..."Can you read"?....Neverless, I do try to be "friendly" and in some small cases overlook a hearie who is somewhat rude, knowing that they just don't know how to respond....even tho' it's 2009 !! A sense of humor can solve things sometimes.

Babyblue

That is hilarious for him to write it, and knowing that you will read it.




Makes me wonder... who is actually making the better first impression!

rockin'robin

Well, that the one time I was very miffed someone would do that...so I wrote back..."NO"!...with a smirk on my face.......

shel90

Babyblue..I have experienced all three that u mentioned when people first find out that I am deaf.

What I hate are the "Iam so sorry!" and then walk away. Ok whatever.

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Shel~

"A child educated only at school is an uneducated child." -George Santayana

Babyblue

Same here... They are like Oh, I did not know.. Then walk away, to never be found again.

I am like...O.K. Idiots!!

KarissaMann05

I usually take out a notebook and pen to communcation with hearing people.

It's not really strong impression. But it's always so nice to see hearing people actually smiles, obviously, my communcation is doing good.

Of course, sometimes, it sucks. =/

Mmm...

Babyblue

Sometimes I get these Fanatics! People that are all over me asking me what is it like. How do you sign this word and that.



I find that overbearing at times too. I do love educating people about deafness. I just want to hang out.

But I do enjoy meeting new people.

I also meet some rude people... That would holler at me and say "Hey! Can you hear me" I would just give them a dirty look. and shake my head, NO!

jillio

The one that really got my goat was the woman that told my son if he just prayed hard enough, God would cure him! I interpeted and he signed back, "I'm not sick!" He was about 8 at the time.

Babyblue

Jillio! I had the same happened to me.

I went to a service. With my Aunt... They said if I had enough faith. I could be cured.

The pastor blamed me for not having enough faith. That is why it did not work.

It majorly pissed me off.


I was 12 at the time....

jillio

I can certainly understand why it pissed you off. Pissed me off when it was said to my kid. He just thought the woman was nuts.

Babyblue

I thought and still they are...

Babyblue

Heck of a first impression they gave me! Eh?

shel90

For me, whenever I encounter someone who acts like a deer caught in headlight when finding out about my deafness, I tell them not to worry and just keep on talking. Usually, I proceed like nothing has changed but it is up to the other person to do the same or not.
As for those walking away, I usually leave it be cuz I am not really a confrontal person most of the time.

As a child, it used to upset me terribly and I would end up obsessing about it for a while.

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Shel~

"A child educated only at school is an uneducated child." -George Santayana

~*Kaelei*~

Yes, first impression is important.

I had few people that had said, "Get outta of here!" Meaning they think I was joking about that I'm deaf. I had few people that would look like they're caught in deer headlights... like they don't know what to do as they found out I'm deaf and they just look at me like they're unsure what to do... I encourage them to go on speaking, that I'm just normal and that I can hear them through my CI. But I never had anyone that just walked away from me when they found out that I'm deaf.... so I never dealt with that before.

But most of the time, they were impressed and they want to know more about my deafness and how I can hear through CI. I must admit, that sometimes annoys me but I just bear it by smiling at them and politely explain it to them.

However... I had quite few deaf people walked away from me when they found out that I have CI... and that royally pisses me off.... just because I have CI doesn't make me less a deaf person.

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saywhatkid

There is no cure for ignorance....

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Oceanblue7

That really made me People are just ignorant out there.

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Pepsi

Sometimes if I meet someone for the first time they notice that I'm looking at their lips and ask me why. then I tell them that I'm hoh some people are okay with it some are not, like I said in another thread what piss me off is that I get that ' Nevermind'

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deafannieboo

haha, yeah the worst thing is when people tell me u dont look deaf! i just wanna say thats funny u dont look stupid. wonders never cease! lol
its just lack of understanding is all!

S.O.B.

No problems are encountered today, besides, many don't know how to approach a deaf individual, so I assist them on how best to communicate with me. When I was younger, I had people perform charades to make their point. It was really stupid, but hilarious! One time, some guy was trying to ask me where the restroom was located, I gestured I didn't understand, so then he proceeded to enact the act itself!

shel90

Lately, I have become aggressive with those who say "nevermind". I used to let it slide but recently, I have been saying "No, No..u are not going to get away with telling me nevermind. Please repeat what u just said and we will continue to communicate."

I guess after all those years, I am fed up so I am refusing to let hearing people get away with it. Even strangers...

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Shel~

"A child educated only at school is an uneducated child." -George Santayana

rockin'robin

I admit, I have lightly "tapped" a hearie's hand when they said..."Oh, never mind"!...and I said...."don't say that!!" and shake my head, and ask them to pls. repeat what they said........that embarrassed them....but I was being firm about it.

There were times when I was younger that I felt so isolated...and became depressed due to some hearies responses to the fact I was deaf....But, time marches on!...I don't let it bother me as much, telling myself if someone says "never mind"....then it really was not worth knowing what they said.

Back to the times, where these "Healing Preachers" were supposedly "healing people"....I did have someone grab my ears....and say "Heal"....Got a out of me!

I've also had one man, who was "overly religious" at work....who told me FLAT OUT in the cafeteria that..."God did not make me Deaf....that the Devil did"!!...So that did make me so very angry....I just walked off.

whatdidyousay!

This remind me when a cop came up to my car and said" Are you deaf !" And I said " No I am HOH ! " Boy that cop was so embarassed! He just walked away!

Babyblue

That was funny.

I have had people approach me, irritated, and would ask me "Are you Deaf?" I would say yeah..

They would be either Apologetic or they would have that "OMG shocked" looked the truly embarrassed one.

rockin'robin

HAHAHAHAHAHA!....Good one!

MoonDrifter

Usually people ask me about my CI and show their curiosity as to how it works. I haven't had a bad experience yet.

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Loghead

I never explain to people that I am HOH (because I never think to tell anyone... I forget about it most of the time). They usually just figure it out for themselves. I remember one time, maybe in last October, I was talking about something regarding my hearing aids and then a good friend of mine asked me, "Yeah, so what are those things in your ears," then I explained it to him and he goes, "So that's what those things are in your ear!" At first I was thinking, "Are you slow?" But I think it would be fair to explain earlier on in the friendship that I do not wear plugs in my ears as fashion statements.

I have had people ask my friends if I could talk. I also have had people ask if I was mentally retarded.

Bottesini

You are not the only one! Those have happened to me more than once.

And as it was pointed out about me earlier today, I am multihandicapped.

So actually in real life, I am often half hiding behind a family member, which probably increases the problem.

Oh well, I am a dynamite internet correspondent!
Yay me!

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