Adjustment to late onset deafness - Page 18

dogmom · 11-19-2009, 03:30 PM

yes, FX, you are correct; initially after college I was doing social services-type stuff working w/senior center, with elderly clients w/dementia of different kinds - no ASL there, although my cultural background as Jewish did help there as it was jewish senior center program. Then I did Case Management work with people with cognitive disabilities, on the "severe" end of autism spectrum, CP, dual-diagnosis, etc. and I didn't happen to have any clients who used ASL or a signed language or a MCE system, although my very rudimentary knowledge of ASL/some Deaf Culture, as well as my having LD myself, did help in acquiring the job and in relation to the LD, in the doing of the job also - AND because of nature of agency, people were very understanding of my LD and any accommodations. My Spanish language skill - especially at that time,when it was fresher in my mind - also was helpful in getting case management position - although I did not happen to have any clients who knew/used Spanish, another case worker did and I suppose if I had stayed there longer, or if my caseload had increased, I may have had some opportunity to use the Spanish. But I think in general having knowledge of languages/cultures besides one's own, having cultural awareness and openess to other cultures around one, was important then and probably even more so today. <the years we're discussing here are from about '93 to around '97/'98>.

FxAvatar · 11-20-2009, 01:41 PM

@dogmom
ya, I figured that they would track what languages each SW knows and then link to them as kids came in. Maybe that is wishful thinking, and it is more like the DMV.. "you are number 64B.. whoever draws that number will be who you get.. ".
As a side note, I have been watching as I go around town now for ANYONE signing.. and noted A.. nobody I have see has used sign.. (where are they all hiding?) and B.. wow, people really do make a lot of random gestures when they talk..
Am I missing some kinda secret hand shake or type of symbol on a poster/wall/sign that means Signer's welcome here?.. :scratch:

dogmom · 11-20-2009, 07:44 PM

I don't know, I run into people signing fairly often.
I think social services is one of those fields which lends itself well to utilizing the language abilities of the employees, even if that wasn't originally part of the job, or why the employee applied for the job.
And yes, in general many people do use gestures in communication; I tend to be very gestural-tactile. I also tend to key into other's body language and get "feelings", possibly partly because I work a lot with dogs whose language is non-verbal.

**Beowulf** · 11-20-2009, 08:47 PM

I visited my parents today at the assisted-living center, and they were pleased as punch. I also took the time to pay my respects to an antiquarian lady there by the name of Marge. She is completely oral and up to now had insisted on lipreading with no signing. This was the tenth time I talked with her, and it looks like she can giggle and laugh after all, hehe. I kept joking with her and she has a smile that would melt anybody's heart. I said that she HAD insisted on lipreading only, but today she actually signed a few things to me, and asked me which book on sign language would be best. I told her that I would give her my old book The Joy of Signing, and she was so thrilled with that bit of news. Poor Marge, though---she confessed to feeling lonely and rejected and said she is making more of an effort to talk with others at the center. I am looking forward to seeing her again when I see my parents again next week.

CJB · 11-20-2009, 09:07 PM

I've discovered a coffee place near my house where Deaf people just seem to flock to. Never thought I'd get so lucky, especially living in what feels like the middle of nowhere.

FxAvatar · 11-21-2009, 09:47 PM

Ok, I am on cloud nine right now.

I just got back from my first meetup with the hearing/HoH/deaf social in my local area. I can’t express in words right now how I am feeling.. It was so wonderful to meet and to see so many people signing! I just wish I could have stayed longer. Even though I was barely able to keep up with most of the signing (and some even less, I was only getting maybe one or two words at the rate some of them are going at it). My friend and I went and were surprised at the amount of people that showed up! The organizer of the social was really nice and came over to our table and was able to hear and sign, so he acted as a tutor and corrected me as I stumbled along with attempting to sign to the other person at our table. The gentleman that was at our table was born deaf, had a deaf father, and was raised with ASL. Everyone was nice and did not mind as I watched and tried to pickup what they signed. The organizer even gave me his email address so that if I wanted to practice, we could video-chat.

I will be going to the next one next month without a doubt, and this reinforced my resolve to take a signing class next semester even if it puts a strain on other things.

**sallylou** · 11-21-2009, 10:33 PM

Great news! Thanks for sharing!

**KristinaB** · 11-21-2009, 10:35 PM

FX:
That sounds great. I know I also had a great reception at the deaf social I went to. Everyone was fantastic. Luckily, the one I go to meets every Tuesday during the day. From 9-3.

**KristinaB** · 11-22-2009, 12:22 PM

Not sure if this is normal or not. Lately, hubby and I have been having problems and as I think about it so does the rest of family. It seems that since I have lost all my hearing and I have now been without it for a little over 3 years, I am not making sense when I talk (I guess

).

I was trying to have a small conversation with hubby this am, but he didn't understand what I was trying to say. Needless to say, little hot-headed me snapped back and took offense. When I write things out in a note, it makes more sense to him (and he has problems reading).

In light of all these issues, hearing loss, financial, living with mother-in-law and raising 2 teens, I still try to find the positive in all thinks. Hubby only thinks of the negative and that really brings me down and starts the anger and frustration.

Any ideas?

**Bottesini** · 11-22-2009, 01:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KristinaB

Not sure if this is normal or not. Lately, hubby and I have been having problems and as I think about it so does the rest of family. It seems that since I have lost all my hearing and I have now been without it for a little over 3 years, I am not making sense when I talk (I guess

).

I was trying to have a small conversation with hubby this am, but he didn't understand what I was trying to say. Needless to say, little hot-headed me snapped back and took offense. When I write things out in a note, it makes more sense to him (and he has problems reading).

In light of all these issues, hearing loss, financial, living with mother-in-law and raising 2 teens, I still try to find the positive in all thinks. Hubby only thinks of the negative and that really brings me down and starts the anger and frustration.

Any ideas?

Counseling. He should sign a little . It will make it easier for him.

**shel90** · 11-22-2009, 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KristinaB

Not sure if this is normal or not. Lately, hubby and I have been having problems and as I think about it so does the rest of family. It seems that since I have lost all my hearing and I have now been without it for a little over 3 years, I am not making sense when I talk (I guess

).

I was trying to have a small conversation with hubby this am, but he didn't understand what I was trying to say. Needless to say, little hot-headed me snapped back and took offense. When I write things out in a note, it makes more sense to him (and he has problems reading).

In light of all these issues, hearing loss, financial, living with mother-in-law and raising 2 teens, I still try to find the positive in all thinks. Hubby only thinks of the negative and that really brings me down and starts the anger and frustration.

Any ideas?

It sounds like he is overwhelmed and isnt handling the stress well by being negative. I agree with Botts..he needs counseling but only if he is receptive to it.

**sallylou** · 11-22-2009, 02:08 PM

Sounds like depression. It also effects concentration and memory. First, a medical check up to rule out any medical cause, then a psych evaluation to diagnose mental health issues. A psych doc can prescribe meds (a therapist can't). The psych dr is a good source for therapist recommendations. I realize that this is a tall order considering the economy and state of health care. Hugs to you.

**KristinaB** · 11-22-2009, 03:08 PM

Hubby was born with slight brain damage and was constantly belittled by parents. "You're too stupid to amount to anything" and things like that. I have been able to deal with it mostly and while we were out of state he really did good, but we are now living with his mother and it is starting all over again. I realize she is a big problem, but currently, we are at her mercy as we can't afford our own housing and we are helping her.

He and I had a long, long talk today and things are a little better. He has promised to try and be more like he was before we moved to Florida. He will also try to work with me more to learn ASL as he can. He has also told his mother "that he is married to Kristina and not her and therefore, he needs to do things according to my wishes before hers" and that she needs to clear more space for us or we will find a way to move out. Needless to say, she has said that she will work on things more for us and make it easier for me. I will just see how long it lasts.

**sallylou** · 11-22-2009, 03:10 PM

Sounds like you're on the right track. I hope that ya'll can get your own place soon. His mom sounds like a huge problem.

**KristinaB** · 11-22-2009, 03:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

Sounds like you're on the right track. I hope that ya'll can get your own place soon. His mom sounds like a huge problem.

She is a major pain, but I think we need to stay here. She is not able to take care of house by herself. She broke a shoulder and it never healed properly, she's not licensed to drive anymore, (no peripheral vision) and can't clean the house. Hubby does the yard and I do the rest while she provides the roof, water and electric. I made a promise to her when we decided to move back to Florida that I would help her and in return, she is leaving the house to us. It is totally paid off and includes 2 lots. The house and carport oare on one and the 2nd lot has the 3 bay garage. If we move out, she will make arrangements to have it sold and the money going to the kids and not me or hubby. Sounds better to stay and deal with it. Her health isn't real good. Not that I'm wishing her dead, but I don't think she will be here for more than another 5-10 years, if that long. My mother may die first.

steph9700 · 11-24-2009, 02:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KristinaB

She is a major pain, but I think we need to stay here. She is not able to take care of house by herself. She broke a shoulder and it never healed properly, she's not licensed to drive anymore, (no peripheral vision) and can't clean the house. Hubby does the yard and I do the rest while she provides the roof, water and electric. I made a promise to her when we decided to move back to Florida that I would help her and in return, she is leaving the house to us. It is totally paid off and includes 2 lots. The house and carport oare on one and the 2nd lot has the 3 bay garage. If we move out, she will make arrangements to have it sold and the money going to the kids and not me or hubby. Sounds better to stay and deal with it. Her health isn't real good. Not that I'm wishing her dead, but I don't think she will be here for more than another 5-10 years, if that long. My mother may die first.

can you find a way to do a small addition like add an apartment over the three bay garage or something until that time comes? possibly buy a a mobile home to put in the back maybe? would be worth a shot to help your husbands mental health, to be able to go somewhere she isn't to get a break from her verbal abuse... just a thought, my husband and I got a small mobile home and set it up in my parents back yard and it saved my sanity, They couldn't just walk in anymore, it gave us more peace than we had living in the basement of their house.

dogmom · 11-24-2009, 12:34 PM

FX, just wanted to write how happy I am to read about your great time at Social

for sharing the fun

**DeafDoc1** · 11-24-2009, 06:55 PM

I'm freaking out a little. I've been invited to my best friend's house for Thanksgiving. Her whole family is coming. None have been around Deaf, my friend is the only one who signs a little, and my lipreading is lousy. To top it off, her mother is a mumbler--you know, the kind that rolls her eyes during the entire conversation, even when she's speaking. And she dominates conversations. I don't want my friend to feel obligated to stop and interpret for me every time her family speaks, she's the hostess. No luck hiring a terp for the evening, I tried. I don't want to back out, but I'm really anxious about this. Any suggestions?

**Bottesini** · 11-24-2009, 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeafDoc1

I'm freaking out a little. I've been invited to my best friend's house for Thanksgiving. Her whole family is coming. None have been around Deaf, my friend is the only one who signs a little, and my lipreading is lousy. To top it off, her mother is a mumbler--you know, the kind that rolls her eyes during the entire conversation, even when she's speaking. And she dominates conversations. I don't want my friend to feel obligated to stop and interpret for me every time her family speaks, she's the hostess. No luck hiring a terp for the evening, I tried. I don't want to back out, but I'm really anxious about this. Any suggestions?

Eat a lot, smile pleasantly, and if you have a netbook take it and write notes. The other guests can write you notes too.

**DeafDoc1** · 11-24-2009, 07:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bottesini

Eat a lot, smile pleasantly, and if you have a netbook take it and write notes. The other guests can write you notes too.

Thanks for the suggestion, Botti. I can still speak clearly, most people understand me, but I have lousy control of my volume--typically much too soft. But writing notes may help, thought awkward during the meal itself. My dad suggested I also excuse myself shortly after dinner and avoid the "post-mortem" chat. I'm hoping for a good football game to watch until dinner starts.

**Bottesini** · 11-24-2009, 07:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeafDoc1

Thanks for the suggestion, Botti. I can still speak clearly, most people understand me, but I have lousy control of my volume--typically much too soft. But writing notes may help, thought awkward during the meal itself. My dad suggested I also excuse myself shortly after dinner and avoid the "post-mortem" chat. I'm hoping for a good football game to watch until dinner starts.

I forgot that talking thing with late deafened people. Nobody understands me!

I should just stay out of here!

**sallylou** · 11-24-2009, 07:37 PM

Your friend wants you to come and to be comfortable. The friend probably wants a break from the nonstop-talking mother who rolls her eyes. Your presence is probably comforting to your friend. Relax and know that you're wanted. You have a great sense of humor and that will break the ice. Just be you!

**KristinaB** · 11-24-2009, 09:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeafDoc1

Thanks for the suggestion, Botti. I can still speak clearly, most people understand me, but I have lousy control of my volume--typically much too soft. But writing notes may help, thought awkward during the meal itself. My dad suggested I also excuse myself shortly after dinner and avoid the "post-mortem" chat. I'm hoping for a good football game to watch until dinner starts.

In my house and when I have been at another's house for dinner, there was no problem with writing notes. You start by letting everyone know your situation and most people are understanding. Who knows, they might even pick up a little sign while you and your friend are conversing. You never know.

Seagirl · 11-26-2009, 10:35 PM

I don't quite have late onset deafness, but the severity now is to extreme to be able to survive in society unaided. I just received my first (useful) hearing aids.

ms_redcat · 12-02-2009, 10:52 PM

[QUOTE=KristinaB;1464225]Not sure if this is normal or not. Lately, hubby and I have been having problems and as I think about it so does the rest of family. It seems that since I have lost all my hearing and I have now been without it for a little over 3 years, I am not making sense when I talk (I guess

).

Do late-deafened adults generally start having significant speech changes? When I went in to look at HAs, the audiologist told me I'd eventually need speech therapy.

That never occurred to me. I'm in my mid-30s. The deaf people I know are either deaf from early childhood, or deafened much later in life (70s and up.) Before my hearing started to go, I hadn't noticed any difference in my older late-deafened relatives' voices (other than volume.)

I didn't ask the audiologist what he meant at the time. Thinking about it later, I wish I did.

So questions for other late-deafened folks out there: Have you had voice changes, and what kind? What, if anything, did you do about it?

hohDougRN · 12-03-2009, 05:16 PM

I dunno if I speak any different. Family and friend members havent said if I do. Its me telling people to say something again; sometimes people say it to me but not often.

**sallylou** · 12-03-2009, 05:48 PM

ms redcat, my hearing loss has effected my speech. I quit saying certain letters as I lost my hearing because I couldn't hear myself saying them. Yea, I should have gotten HAs sooner but you know that denial stage in which you invent clever coping skills. Now that I have HAs and I am aware of the problem, I've consciously started using these letters again. It's taken some effort. I don't know what will happen in the future as I lose more hearing. I have progressive genetic loss so it will be an ongoing issue for me. Let me know how you progress. I'm interested in learning more.

**LDNanna** · 12-03-2009, 08:31 PM

Some folks tell me my tone is flat, I have a bit of trouble with beginning or endings, so they say.
It took about 10 yrs of progressive loss, then deafness before anyone commented. Hubby says its fine. Boss mostly comments.

**KristinaB** · 12-03-2009, 08:42 PM

[quote=ms_redcat;1473446]

Quote:

Originally Posted by KristinaB

Not sure if this is normal or not. Lately, hubby and I have been having problems and as I think about it so does the rest of family. It seems that since I have lost all my hearing and I have now been without it for a little over 3 years, I am not making sense when I talk (I guess

).

Do late-deafened adults generally start having significant speech changes? When I went in to look at HAs, the audiologist told me I'd eventually need speech therapy.

That never occurred to me. I'm in my mid-30s. The deaf people I know are either deaf from early childhood, or deafened much later in life (70s and up.) Before my hearing started to go, I hadn't noticed any difference in my older late-deafened relatives' voices (other than volume.)

I didn't ask the audiologist what he meant at the time. Thinking about it later, I wish I did.

So questions for other late-deafened folks out there: Have you had voice changes, and what kind? What, if anything, did you do about it?

My voice never changed. In fact, I have people who say that my speech and diction is so clear they can't believe I can't hear a thing. What I am running into is there are times when I will forget how to say simple words that are in everyday speech. It's almost like I get tired or something. Just today, I could not remember how to say number, but after sounding it out and having my family correct me, I finally got it after 2-3 minutes. Very frustrating. However, I am going without speaking more often since the hearing world doesn't believe I am deaf.

dogmom · 12-04-2009, 07:49 AM

Although at moment I am not late-deaf, I have wondered about this, too as my speech is affected by speech and languages issues I had as child. People who know me understand me, but I often run into times in daily life where strangers or acquaintances have difficulty.

11-21-2009, 10:33 PM	#517 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	Great news! Thanks for sharing! __________________

11-21-2009, 10:35 PM	#518 (permalink)
KristinaB New SDIT Deacon Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Land of the backstroke Posts: 13,772	FX: That sounds great. I know I also had a great reception at the deaf social I went to. Everyone was fantastic. Luckily, the one I go to meets every Tuesday during the day. From 9-3. __________________ Taking life one day at a time.

11-22-2009, 12:22 PM	#519 (permalink)
KristinaB New SDIT Deacon Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Land of the backstroke Posts: 13,772	Not sure if this is normal or not. Lately, hubby and I have been having problems and as I think about it so does the rest of family. It seems that since I have lost all my hearing and I have now been without it for a little over 3 years, I am not making sense when I talk (I guess ). I was trying to have a small conversation with hubby this am, but he didn't understand what I was trying to say. Needless to say, little hot-headed me snapped back and took offense. When I write things out in a note, it makes more sense to him (and he has problems reading). In light of all these issues, hearing loss, financial, living with mother-in-law and raising 2 teens, I still try to find the positive in all thinks. Hubby only thinks of the negative and that really brings me down and starts the anger and frustration. Any ideas? __________________ Taking life one day at a time.

11-22-2009, 02:08 PM	#522 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	Sounds like depression. It also effects concentration and memory. First, a medical check up to rule out any medical cause, then a psych evaluation to diagnose mental health issues. A psych doc can prescribe meds (a therapist can't). The psych dr is a good source for therapist recommendations. I realize that this is a tall order considering the economy and state of health care. Hugs to you. __________________

11-22-2009, 03:08 PM	#523 (permalink)
KristinaB New SDIT Deacon Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Land of the backstroke Posts: 13,772	Hubby was born with slight brain damage and was constantly belittled by parents. "You're too stupid to amount to anything" and things like that. I have been able to deal with it mostly and while we were out of state he really did good, but we are now living with his mother and it is starting all over again. I realize she is a big problem, but currently, we are at her mercy as we can't afford our own housing and we are helping her. He and I had a long, long talk today and things are a little better. He has promised to try and be more like he was before we moved to Florida. He will also try to work with me more to learn ASL as he can. He has also told his mother "that he is married to Kristina and not her and therefore, he needs to do things according to my wishes before hers" and that she needs to clear more space for us or we will find a way to move out. Needless to say, she has said that she will work on things more for us and make it easier for me. I will just see how long it lasts. __________________ Taking life one day at a time.

11-19-2009, 03:30 PM	#511 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,472	yes, FX, you are correct; initially after college I was doing social services-type stuff working w/senior center, with elderly clients w/dementia of different kinds - no ASL there, although my cultural background as Jewish did help there as it was jewish senior center program. Then I did Case Management work with people with cognitive disabilities, on the "severe" end of autism spectrum, CP, dual-diagnosis, etc. and I didn't happen to have any clients who used ASL or a signed language or a MCE system, although my very rudimentary knowledge of ASL/some Deaf Culture, as well as my having LD myself, did help in acquiring the job and in relation to the LD, in the doing of the job also - AND because of nature of agency, people were very understanding of my LD and any accommodations. My Spanish language skill - especially at that time,when it was fresher in my mind - also was helpful in getting case management position - although I did not happen to have any clients who knew/used Spanish, another case worker did and I suppose if I had stayed there longer, or if my caseload had increased, I may have had some opportunity to use the Spanish. But I think in general having knowledge of languages/cultures besides one's own, having cultural awareness and openess to other cultures around one, was important then and probably even more so today. <the years we're discussing here are from about '93 to around '97/'98>.

Today
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11-20-2009, 01:41 PM	#512 (permalink)
FxAvatar Registered User Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Grandview MO (Kansas City area) Posts: 93	@dogmom ya, I figured that they would track what languages each SW knows and then link to them as kids came in. Maybe that is wishful thinking, and it is more like the DMV.. "you are number 64B.. whoever draws that number will be who you get.. ". As a side note, I have been watching as I go around town now for ANYONE signing.. and noted A.. nobody I have see has used sign.. (where are they all hiding?) and B.. wow, people really do make a lot of random gestures when they talk.. Am I missing some kinda secret hand shake or type of symbol on a poster/wall/sign that means Signer's welcome here?.. :scratch:

11-20-2009, 07:44 PM	#513 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,472	I don't know, I run into people signing fairly often. I think social services is one of those fields which lends itself well to utilizing the language abilities of the employees, even if that wasn't originally part of the job, or why the employee applied for the job. And yes, in general many people do use gestures in communication; I tend to be very gestural-tactile. I also tend to key into other's body language and get "feelings", possibly partly because I work a lot with dogs whose language is non-verbal.

11-20-2009, 08:47 PM	#514 (permalink)
Beowulf Premium Member Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 10,515	I visited my parents today at the assisted-living center, and they were pleased as punch. I also took the time to pay my respects to an antiquarian lady there by the name of Marge. She is completely oral and up to now had insisted on lipreading with no signing. This was the tenth time I talked with her, and it looks like she can giggle and laugh after all, hehe. I kept joking with her and she has a smile that would melt anybody's heart. I said that she HAD insisted on lipreading only, but today she actually signed a few things to me, and asked me which book on sign language would be best. I told her that I would give her my old book The Joy of Signing, and she was so thrilled with that bit of news. Poor Marge, though---she confessed to feeling lonely and rejected and said she is making more of an effort to talk with others at the center. I am looking forward to seeing her again when I see my parents again next week.

11-20-2009, 09:07 PM	#515 (permalink)
CJB Registered User Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: U.S. Posts: 2,767	I've discovered a coffee place near my house where Deaf people just seem to flock to. Never thought I'd get so lucky, especially living in what feels like the middle of nowhere.

11-21-2009, 09:47 PM	#516 (permalink)
FxAvatar Registered User Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Grandview MO (Kansas City area) Posts: 93	Ok, I am on cloud nine right now. I just got back from my first meetup with the hearing/HoH/deaf social in my local area. I can’t express in words right now how I am feeling.. It was so wonderful to meet and to see so many people signing! I just wish I could have stayed longer. Even though I was barely able to keep up with most of the signing (and some even less, I was only getting maybe one or two words at the rate some of them are going at it). My friend and I went and were surprised at the amount of people that showed up! The organizer of the social was really nice and came over to our table and was able to hear and sign, so he acted as a tutor and corrected me as I stumbled along with attempting to sign to the other person at our table. The gentleman that was at our table was born deaf, had a deaf father, and was raised with ASL. Everyone was nice and did not mind as I watched and tried to pickup what they signed. The organizer even gave me his email address so that if I wanted to practice, we could video-chat. I will be going to the next one next month without a doubt, and this reinforced my resolve to take a signing class next semester even if it puts a strain on other things.

11-22-2009, 03:10 PM	#524 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	Sounds like you're on the right track. I hope that ya'll can get your own place soon. His mom sounds like a huge problem. __________________

11-24-2009, 12:34 PM	#527 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,472	FX, just wanted to write how happy I am to read about your great time at Social for sharing the fun

11-24-2009, 06:55 PM	#528 (permalink)
DeafDoc1 Premium Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 1,146	I'm freaking out a little. I've been invited to my best friend's house for Thanksgiving. Her whole family is coming. None have been around Deaf, my friend is the only one who signs a little, and my lipreading is lousy. To top it off, her mother is a mumbler--you know, the kind that rolls her eyes during the entire conversation, even when she's speaking. And she dominates conversations. I don't want my friend to feel obligated to stop and interpret for me every time her family speaks, she's the hostess. No luck hiring a terp for the evening, I tried. I don't want to back out, but I'm really anxious about this. Any suggestions? __________________ What's up, Doc?

11-24-2009, 07:37 PM	#532 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	Your friend wants you to come and to be comfortable. The friend probably wants a break from the nonstop-talking mother who rolls her eyes. Your presence is probably comforting to your friend. Relax and know that you're wanted. You have a great sense of humor and that will break the ice. Just be you! __________________

11-26-2009, 10:35 PM	#534 (permalink)
Seagirl Registered User Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Middle of here, halfway to there, and about 50 miles outside of anywhere Posts: 37	Hello I don't quite have late onset deafness, but the severity now is to extreme to be able to survive in society unaided. I just received my first (useful) hearing aids.

12-02-2009, 10:52 PM	#535 (permalink)
ms_redcat Registered User Join Date: May 2009 Location: New York Posts: 58	[QUOTE=KristinaB;1464225]Not sure if this is normal or not. Lately, hubby and I have been having problems and as I think about it so does the rest of family. It seems that since I have lost all my hearing and I have now been without it for a little over 3 years, I am not making sense when I talk (I guess ). Do late-deafened adults generally start having significant speech changes? When I went in to look at HAs, the audiologist told me I'd eventually need speech therapy. That never occurred to me. I'm in my mid-30s. The deaf people I know are either deaf from early childhood, or deafened much later in life (70s and up.) Before my hearing started to go, I hadn't noticed any difference in my older late-deafened relatives' voices (other than volume.) I didn't ask the audiologist what he meant at the time. Thinking about it later, I wish I did. So questions for other late-deafened folks out there: Have you had voice changes, and what kind? What, if anything, did you do about it?

12-03-2009, 05:16 PM	#536 (permalink)
hohDougRN Registered User Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: utah Posts: 3,257	I dunno if I speak any different. Family and friend members havent said if I do. Its me telling people to say something again; sometimes people say it to me but not often. __________________ *Doug*

12-03-2009, 05:48 PM	#537 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	ms redcat, my hearing loss has effected my speech. I quit saying certain letters as I lost my hearing because I couldn't hear myself saying them. Yea, I should have gotten HAs sooner but you know that denial stage in which you invent clever coping skills. Now that I have HAs and I am aware of the problem, I've consciously started using these letters again. It's taken some effort. I don't know what will happen in the future as I lose more hearing. I have progressive genetic loss so it will be an ongoing issue for me. Let me know how you progress. I'm interested in learning more. __________________

12-03-2009, 08:31 PM	#538 (permalink)
LDNanna Premium Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 2,688	Some folks tell me my tone is flat, I have a bit of trouble with beginning or endings, so they say. It took about 10 yrs of progressive loss, then deafness before anyone commented. Hubby says its fine. Boss mostly comments.

12-04-2009, 07:49 AM	#540 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,472	Although at moment I am not late-deaf, I have wondered about this, too as my speech is affected by speech and languages issues I had as child. People who know me understand me, but I often run into times in daily life where strangers or acquaintances have difficulty.

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