Adjustment to late onset deafness - Page 12

CJB · 09-28-2009, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

I had one person tell me that she thought that I was kidding when I told her that I have a hearing loss. Because hearing loss is soooooo funny!

I also love when someone new adopts the funeral face and says "I'm sorry." Dude, I can't hear--I'm not dead!

Well hey, "deaf" isn't that far off from "death."

**sallylou** · 09-28-2009, 05:55 PM

Why do I have an image of a deaf person signing to a corpse in my head now? He's dead not deaf! :rofl2:

CJB · 09-28-2009, 05:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

Why do I have an image of a deaf person signing to a corpse in my head now? He's dead not deaf! :rofl2:

:rofl2:

**sallylou** · 09-28-2009, 05:58 PM

We're a good comedy team today!

At least we amuse ourselves.

CJB · 09-28-2009, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

We're a good comedy team today!

I guess hearing loss can be funny sometimes.

**sallylou** · 09-28-2009, 06:01 PM

You're welcome. Life requires a good sense of humor.

hohpolice · 10-02-2009, 03:44 PM

I appreciate the support. I now understand the term discrimination...unfortunately.

**Bottesini** · 10-02-2009, 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hohpolice

I appreciate the support. I now understand the term discrimination...unfortunately.

Sorry to jump in here since I was born this way, but why is it unfortunate for you to understand discrimination?

It will make you stronger in the long run. Also I suggest you can change peoples perceptions and get rid of some of the discrimination in the world.

**sallylou** · 10-02-2009, 04:33 PM

I've dealt with sexism my whole life. It's a shock when an formerly-hearing male faces discrimination, though, because you've had the luxury of being unaware of your privilege all of your life. You'll develop more empathy now. That's a good thing.

dreama · 10-02-2009, 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

I've dealt with sexism my whole life. It's a shock when an formerly-hearing male faces discrimination, though, because you've had the luxury of being unaware of your privilege all of your life. You'll develop more empathy now. That's a good thing.

I think most people face discrimination of one sort or another. I was born disabled so I've known it all my life, plus being half french, and bisexual. I've not really faced so much sexism though, maybe I was just lucky or the discrimination I faced for being disabled was so much greater that I may not even have noticed.

**sallylou** · 10-02-2009, 07:32 PM

I grew up in the South and I've never fit the role of a good Southern belle. Being labeled a "smart girl" was social death. If only I would have been the quiet, subservient girl that my family wanted... *sigh*

I'm also old enough to remember having to check the temperature to see if I was allowed to wear pants instead of a dress to school that day, nurse kits instead of doctor kits for girls because girls are nurses only, etc.

You're younger than I am, dreama, and you live in a different country. I hope that your experiences were different. It may also be that discrimination against you for being disabled was worse than any other form discrimination. No matter what the basis for the discrimination, it sucks not to be treated as an individual with her own goals and strengths.

dreama · 10-02-2009, 07:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

No matter what the basis for the discrimination, it sucks not to be treated as an individual with her own goals and strengths.

I definately agree on that.

jillio · 10-03-2009, 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

I grew up in the South and I've never fit the role of a good Southern belle. Being labeled a "smart girl" was social death. If only I would have been the quiet, subservient girl that my family wanted... *sigh*

I'm also old enough to remember having to check the temperature to see if I was allowed to wear pants instead of a dress to school that day, nurse kits instead of doctor kits for girls because girls are nurses only, etc.

You're younger than I am, dreama, and you live in a different country. I hope that your experiences were different. It may also be that discrimination against you for being disabled was worse than any other form discrimination. No matter what the basis for the discrimination, it sucks not to be treated as an individual with her own goals and strengths.

Well said. Discrimination is discrimination, no matter the basis for it. It has the same destructive effects on the individual, and on society, as well. Discrimination coming from perspective A is no worse, or no less worse, than discrimination coming from perspective B. It is still discrimination, the intent is the same, and the results are the same.

**deafskeptic** · 10-03-2009, 08:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

I grew up in the South and I've never fit the role of a good Southern belle. Being labeled a "smart girl" was social death. If only I would have been the quiet, subservient girl that my family wanted... *sigh*

I'm also old enough to remember having to check the temperature to see if I was allowed to wear pants instead of a dress to school that day, nurse kits instead of doctor kits for girls because girls are nurses only, etc.

You're younger than I am, dreama, and you live in a different country. I hope that your experiences were different. It may also be that discrimination against you for being disabled was worse than any other form discrimination. No matter what the basis for the discrimination, it sucks not to be treated as an individual with her own goals and strengths.

What part of the South did you grow up in? I've always felt at odds with much of mainstream South especially regarding politics.

**deafskeptic** · 10-03-2009, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CJB

I have a lot of people not taking my hearing loss seriously either. I wonder why that is. They act surprised when I actually don't hear something too. Some of the people I know think I'm nuts for using a Brailtalk and wonder why I can't just talk verbally, why I make them go through the effort of spelling out content words on the Brailtalk "for nothing." Because I can't hear you! Not to mention, unlike some sighted deaf people (not all, even though most hearing people seem to think all deaf people can flawlessly read lips), I can't read your lips either because I'm blind too!

Acckk. The hearing expect all deaf to lipread even the deaf-blind ones? That's absurd.

I've never known what's it like to be born hearing and to lose your hearing later in life.

Once I met a girl on an online text based game who couldn't wrap her head around the concept that I wasn't blind as well as deaf. She thought I was like Helen Keller.

**sallylou** · 10-03-2009, 09:55 PM

Deafskeptic, I grew up in Texas. It's way different here as far as politics, religion and women's roles in society. I lived in Colorado for 7 years and I prefer living there. I'm in Texas again for now.

**deafskeptic** · 10-03-2009, 11:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

Deafskeptic, I grew up in Texas. It's way different here as far as politics, religion and women's roles in society. I lived in Colorado for 7 years and I prefer living there. I'm in Texas again for now.

I've never been there. I take it you grew up in a conservative part of Texas as I know part of Texas is liberal.

I'm from Virgina and many in Virginia think that Northern VA (around DC area) shouldn't be considered part of the South or VA. Many maps now no longer consider it part of the South.

I grew up in a very tradtional family and my mother had a hard time putting me in a skirt. I rarely wear them even now.

steph9700 · 10-04-2009, 05:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafskeptic

What part of the South did you grow up in? I've always felt at odds with much of mainstream South especially regarding politics.

I was born in Germany, my dad was army but I was raised in Cullman Alabama from the time I was 6yrs. old. I hated all the discriminations... I went to the ONLY school in the county that had students that were not white. I was allowed to have black friends but wasn't allowed to go to their house and they weren't allowed to come to mine... Until recently there weren't any employees in the school system that were anything other than white. There is now 1 black teacher at Cullman High school but there are many different races of students in most of the schools in the county now... (wow, hard to believe I graduated almost 17yrs. ago!) A lot has changed since I went to school there but a lot of the racial tensions are still there, it's like the Mayberry T.V. show way back in the 50's and 60's still in a lot of ways, just a bigger population. The religious aspects... so many people I grew up with got so mad because a catholic monastery built a place out in Hanceville, I mean they were catholic nuns, not Pagan or Jewish or Buddhist or anything else, I mean catholic falls under the Christian category of religion and they STILL were fussing about it because they weren't traditional southern baptist or some of the other, smaller, denominations already in Cullman. I am still in Alabama, for now, but at least in Birmingham it isn't as bad... I would love to move some where warmer like Florida, or Nevada, or something, but for now... we are still here! I did wind up being a nurse for a few years but only because my brother & I went together... to grow up hard of hearing, with my dad having all the stigmas he had and wouldn't let me have hearing aids- said I had to learn by reading lips or else on top of the small town southern belle crap I had to put up with... well you guys get the drift...
I hate when I ask someone to repeat & they look at me with and say one of those really stupid comments like; "I didn't stutter", or, "are you deaf or what" while laughing at least until I say yes, or say really loud and hateful "YOU HEARD ME!", well no I didn't!
My husbands former boss from Hanceville (before he got promoted and went to the corporate office) used to tell people he had a deaf and dumb worker on second shift and no one could tell him anything because he was too stupid and that the only reason he hired him was to meet the workers discrimination laws about hiring people with disabilities...
I cornered him with several office staff present at last springs company picnic and asked him why he thought the guy was dumb? He said cause he didn't talk (and several other idiotic and asinine reasons)... I asked him if he thought I was dumb like that guy and he started laughing and said no, he said he had talked to me when I came in to see Tony and he knew I wasn't as stupid like him, I saw red... I got a clip out of my bag and pulled my hair up off my ears so everyone around us that was laughing and agreeing with him AND the deaf guy standing close by could see the over the ear hearing aids I was wearing and had worn the whole time my husband had worked there and said very loudly... "Just because we are deaf it makes us dumb? maybe your the dumb one because you don't know how to write a note or use sign language to communicate with us you piece of worthless shit!"... he hasn't used that term since at least around me or the other staff members at that branch that I talk to still, and I got tons of pats on the back and smiles from people there that work under him still. The guy only knew me from the time my husband started working there which up to that time had been 7 years, I had never worn my hair up or back off my ears when I was around him at the office, so he didn't know I had hearing aids. He lived and worked in Texas until the corporate boss hired him and he moved here so he didn't know me from the community or anything, just what little he saw me when I came to the office to bring Tony lunch or some small company gathering like that

steph9700 · 10-04-2009, 07:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CJB

Thanks so much steph9700. I can't see the picture as I'm blind but I will ask my doctor about it.

I also heard that BTE's are useful for TMJ hearing loss.

you're very welcome. most companies that make behind the ear hearing aids now make the newer open ear type fittings that you can easily use with your TMJ issues, you just have to search for them a little bit, print out what you find and show your Dr.'s office the next time you go or find another office that will help you better.

SerendipityG3A · 10-04-2009, 11:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by quirkylibra

I don't know if it's normal, but I can relate. My friends and family act like they don't remember or care. They definately don't seem to take it seriously. Some people in my family even turn off to CC while I am watching tv because they think it's annoying. This summer, I even had a good friend say to me "Oh, you really can't hear, can you?" I was like did you think I just make stuff up and stick these things in my ear for fun or what? So, you are not alone and it's sad because eventually they will miss out on communicating with us because they won't know how.

The person in the doctor's office who take my vitals before the doctor comes in asked me if I wear those things to block the sound. Until that day, I used to think those people went to medical school. Makes me wonder if they went to school at all. Why would I spend thousands of dollars on these "things" if I could just go to Walmart and buy ear plugs for a dollar?

**sallylou** · 10-05-2009, 08:52 AM

deafskeptic, Austin is more liberal than other cities in Texas. I am proud that my county went to President Obama the past presidential election.

Steph, Cullman Alabama sounds like the worst place ever! Sorry.

dogmom · 10-05-2009, 08:57 AM

If I for some reason had to live in Texas, Austin would be the only place for me-

**Bottesini** · 10-05-2009, 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dogmom

If I for some reason had to live in Texas, Austin would be the only place for me-

If you mean because it is liberal, El Paso is the same. Plus they have great food, and you can buy your prescriptions and almost everything else totally cheep in Jaurez.

They also have a great natural foods coop that we used to visit all the time.

dogmom · 10-05-2009, 10:34 AM

yes, you right and

for info., Botti! Now I know something about El Paso - very good to know about food coop, too!

**Bottesini** · 10-05-2009, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dogmom

yes, you right and

for info., Botti! Now I know something about El Paso - very good to know about food coop, too!

You can tell I am still a big El Paso supporter, even though I have been gone for several years.

**sallylou** · 10-05-2009, 12:14 PM

I'm sad to say that El Paso has become increasingly violent. The drug violence spills over the border. Jaurez has seen too much violence lately. Breaks my heart.

**Bottesini** · 10-05-2009, 12:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

I'm sad to say that El Paso has become increasingly violent. The drug violence spills over the border. Jaurez has seen too much violence lately. Breaks my heart.

Seems to be a serial killer working in Jaurez too.

**sallylou** · 10-05-2009, 12:29 PM

Yes, the women are disappearing. It makes me angry that no one has done anything to help these poor women.

dogmom · 10-05-2009, 04:38 PM

**deafskeptic** · 10-05-2009, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sallylou

deafskeptic, Austin is more liberal than other cities in Texas. I am proud that my county went to President Obama the past presidential election.

Steph, Cullman Alabama sounds like the worst place ever! Sorry.

Austin sounds like my kind of town then.

09-28-2009, 05:55 PM	#332 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	Why do I have an image of a deaf person signing to a corpse in my head now? He's dead not deaf! :rofl2: __________________

09-28-2009, 05:58 PM	#334 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	We're a good comedy team today! At least we amuse ourselves. __________________

09-28-2009, 06:01 PM	#336 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	You're welcome. Life requires a good sense of humor. __________________

10-02-2009, 04:33 PM	#339 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	I've dealt with sexism my whole life. It's a shock when an formerly-hearing male faces discrimination, though, because you've had the luxury of being unaware of your privilege all of your life. You'll develop more empathy now. That's a good thing. __________________

10-02-2009, 07:32 PM	#341 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	I grew up in the South and I've never fit the role of a good Southern belle. Being labeled a "smart girl" was social death. If only I would have been the quiet, subservient girl that my family wanted... sigh I'm also old enough to remember having to check the temperature to see if I was allowed to wear pants instead of a dress to school that day, nurse kits instead of doctor kits for girls because girls are nurses only, etc. You're younger than I am, dreama, and you live in a different country. I hope that your experiences were different. It may also be that discrimination against you for being disabled was worse than any other form discrimination. No matter what the basis for the discrimination, it sucks not to be treated as an individual with her own goals and strengths. __________________

Today
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10-02-2009, 03:44 PM	#337 (permalink)
hohpolice Registered User Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 16	I appreciate the support. I now understand the term discrimination...unfortunately.

10-03-2009, 09:55 PM	#346 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	Deafskeptic, I grew up in Texas. It's way different here as far as politics, religion and women's roles in society. I lived in Colorado for 7 years and I prefer living there. I'm in Texas again for now. __________________

10-05-2009, 08:52 AM	#351 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	deafskeptic, Austin is more liberal than other cities in Texas. I am proud that my county went to President Obama the past presidential election. Steph, Cullman Alabama sounds like the worst place ever! Sorry. __________________

10-05-2009, 08:57 AM	#352 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,470	If I for some reason had to live in Texas, Austin would be the only place for me-

10-05-2009, 10:34 AM	#354 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,470	yes, you right and for info., Botti! Now I know something about El Paso - very good to know about food coop, too!

10-05-2009, 12:14 PM	#356 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	I'm sad to say that El Paso has become increasingly violent. The drug violence spills over the border. Jaurez has seen too much violence lately. Breaks my heart. __________________

10-05-2009, 12:29 PM	#358 (permalink)
sallylou Potterhead and Janeite Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: My own private Idaho Posts: 6,653	Yes, the women are disappearing. It makes me angry that no one has done anything to help these poor women. __________________

10-05-2009, 04:38 PM	#359 (permalink)
dogmom Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5,470

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