charlotte1

How do you deal with hearing people mocking the way you talk? Here in the UK there is quite a bit of it goes on well in my town there is. I personally dont care but my young daughter gets upset when she realises that not only other kids but sometimes adults have mocked her speech.

Deafness

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jillio

Unfortunately, there are rude, insensitive, ignorant people every where you go. They are best ignored. I always explained to my son that he should simply ignore their actions, and to feel sorry for them, as they obviously had never been taught any better, and must feel very bad about themselves if they had to resort to making fun of others in order to make themselves feel good avout themselves.

Chase

An expert post by an expert. Thanks, Jillio.

The same happens in writing . . . people who communicate in ASL tend to write as ASL looks to them. They receive lots of criticism for it and are ridiculed and labeled by those with only marginally better skills.

Naturally, it hurts and they withdraw.

Currently, some members with degrees of assisted hearing are complaining because some total deafies are not more open to them. Perhaps one reason could be the constant jeering at deafie's attempts to translate ASL to written English.

jillio

YW. And I couldn't agree with you more. Few are able to recognize that their own actions are the basis for rejection. It is much easier to blame the other.

pek1

Very well said, Chase. Might I add, there's a person here that I was always editing his or her post when I replied, because he or she posted as if he or she were signing. I don't do that anymore, even though it almost drives me nuts not to edit. The only editing I do now is to delete part of what I will quote and leave the rest of that poster's post alone.

I'm aware of the deaf squeal (I believe that's what it's called) and I ignore it. When people gawk and point at me and Snickers, I ignore them, unless it's a bit much by them . . . usually by a parent to a toddler, which the parent knows better than to do that.

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jenni-m

Well, I don't speak English so.

I'm sure I have been made fun of more often than I know, but often I am not aware if someone is doing it (since I can't really see what people do very well)

Though I have learned not to try and get a strangers attention and talk to them by myself. Even though I tend to keep a small whiteboard with erasable marker with me, plus a notepad and pen, I have had times in public where I try to solicit communications with someone and get ignored and even avoided.

So usually if I'm going to somewhere unfamiliar, I don't go alone. And even places I know well, which are close by to me, I only go alone if people there are familiar with me (like my pharmacy) and only do it rarely.

Rainshower77

mock back at them... mock how they look when they mock


other than that, I'll just ignore them..

jillio

While mocking back is always tempting because they look so ignorant and goofy, its best not to lower yourself to their level.

Matilda

Well said!

shel90

I think mocking deaf people's writing will just make them more afraid and willing to write therefore hurting their chances to improve their writing skills. I think that's the worst thing anyone can do.

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Jiro

they make fun of you because they know you're better than them. They just want to feel validated. Fighting them back will just make them feel better about themselves. Simply just ignore them and by doing that, it makes them feel shameful about themselves for being useless and ignorant.

Rainshower77

I agree with you all...

And people who made fun of deaf people have made fun of other people too... so it isn't you, it's them...

charlotte1

Thank you everyone for your replies, as I said it doesnt bother me if they do it to me but my kid is young and sensitive.

Brian

Been through a lot of this during my childhood years.

Charlotte, what I would advise you to talk with your daughter about this and encourage her to ignore them, etc.

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AlleyCat

Oh, I was mocked plenty while growing up. And it hurt. The best I could do was to ignore them. I even tried mocking them back but that only spurred them on more, so I gave that up and tried hard to ignore them. It's hard. I wish I had better advice for you, but all I can tell you is to tell your daughter to ignore them the best she can.

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SCBassist

Simple, ignore them and focus on your task at hand. If they get in your face, make them see what idiots they are and move on. If you are a small person, it may help to have someone accompany you for that extra "firepower". Idiots like that are almost always accompanied by other idiots like them, they can't even stand up for themselves.

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Rainshower77

Seriously, the only thing I found that work is laugh and act like you can take a joke.

because people like to see you get upset , and if they see that you don't get upset (even ignoring them tells them that you got upset), they will give up. They will realize that no matter what they do, they can't make you cry.

SCBassist

They've got a counter for upbeat reactions. The point is NOT to react at all.

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deafbajagal

Throw water balloons at them. It will not solve anything - but you sure will feel good at that moment! . Ok, I'm kidding. Sort of.


On a serious note, I would say ignore them and keep your head up high.

Rainshower77

It works for some people.

Jiro

take your kid to boxing class or jitsu. it helps. It's not necessary to make him learn how to fight but to improve his self-confidence.

NorCal20

when i was teenager age, i see somebody mock at me and my friends. I flipped my middle finger and said to 'em, "F..k y'all and i can hear y'all" then copy what did they said from my voice to speak. Its always works.

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charlotte1

I dont think my 9 year old is ready to flip the middle finger not yet anyway

Jiro

it's never too young!

Bottesini

Well said!

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VamPyroX

There was a time when I was in high school and I was at the mall with a couple of my deaf friends. We were signing as we were walking back to his car. A couple of hearing guys saw us and started mock-signing to us as well as talking in a way that he was making fun of us and we would never hear what he was saying.

What they didn't know was that I was hard-of-hearing and could understand clearly what they were saying.

So, I calmly replied... "You call that sign language?"

They immediately stopped talking with a shocked face, gulped, and walked away in embarrassment. Hehehe!

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NEWIDME

If I was 9 and this was happening to me, there are 2 things I think my mom would have done. First she would have given me a book on other tweeny's who are deaf. Then she would try her dangest to find some well known/famous tweeny's who are deaf. Maybe a bibilograpy by a deaf person documenting how they grew up and dealt w/ their challenges? She would have found a book, though. She gave me many a books and they all helped me get by. I am so sorry your dd is going through this.

NEWIDME

I am not sure if you are aware of this site but I think if you dig around this site, maybe something will pop out at you. I only did a search for I am a deaf teenager. There is a section labeled stories from deaf kids and adults growing up w/ a hearing loss. I think somewhere in there you can print for your dd. HTH

Raising Deaf Kids