Deaf culture - do's and don'ts, etc. Let's make a list! - Page 2

Cheri · 10-20-2007, 08:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dixie

I would also want to know if my HA is making whistling sounds!

Lol I remembered being told that my hearing aid is making whistling noises, I would get so embarrassed and say "damn those hearing aids, can you be quiet for gawd sake!".

shel90 · 10-20-2007, 09:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafskeptic

These two phrases have to be the most hated phrases in the deaf community.

I agree with u on that one. It makes me want to go pycho whenever a hearing person says those who phrases. Whenever those two phrases were used when I was a child, it made me feel worse about the situation. Not a good feeling to have.

shel90 · 10-20-2007, 09:31 AM

Pls do not much so much focus on our ability to speak like "Wow!!! u can talk!" "U must be so smart for u to be able to talk so good!"

I suggest maybe make a nice comment but dont go on and on and on about it.

jillio · 10-20-2007, 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafskeptic

Good thing no one reported you for child abuse.

Actually, I did have a neigbor who was hearing call children's services and report me because I allowed my deaf son to ride a bicycle, and she thought I was putting him in danger and being neglectful! Go figure!

Kaitin · 10-20-2007, 11:26 AM

I like this thread!

Don't say with every sentence "do you understand?" or "did you hear me?". Our neighbor at my parents house does and I avoid her. Every sentence. Again and again. I want to say "Stop! Do you understand?".

Liebling:-))) · 10-20-2007, 11:46 AM

Good thread

I own flash lighting outlets in my household. You can see that exact picture what I have in my house... See the red arrow of black figure stand - Alarm... "call us"...

It annoys me when my boys are upstair and we are downstair... They are too lazy to call us from upstair so they press the "Alarm" button to tell us to come up to them... They did it sometimes... They said to me that we did the same thing to call with our voice to them from upstair when they are downstair... It annoy them, too...

It make no difference... I told them that flash lighting for long 30 seconds everywhere in my house bothers me...

The light flashing continue for long 30 seconds when they press the Alarm button. Everyone will think we are

and play with flash camera everywhere in my house when they see continue flash lights from windows...

We made

for use emergency if I call them with voice as same as they press the alarm button... until we agreed Arrrrghhh...

Liebling:-))) · 10-20-2007, 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cheri

I don't like it when someone throws an object at me to get my attention, that's rude and disrespectful. If someone trying to get my attention, it's more polite and respectful to come up and tab me on the shoulder.

I don't mind if anyone flick the lights to get my attention or stomp their feet.

I do not like when someone yells or shout while communicating with me, It's not gonna make me hear any better.

I don't like door slamming either, It annoys me.

*nodding agreement* I know that feeling... I don´t like it either... They throw something to get my attention...

Liebling:-))) · 10-20-2007, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IslandGal

Good thread here!!

Oh I hate it if someone throws a dangerous object at me. Once a friend threw a pen at me and know where the pointed end landed? Right in between of my eyes. I said OW and reached my hand up to where it had hurt. I then saw some blood on my hand and looked at my friend whose eyes were wide open. I then went to look in a mirror, seeing that I looked so horrible with blood running down my nose. I told my friend what if it had landed right into my eye?! Thank goodness, it didn't.

Yeah, my boss did that to me, too... *sigh* He throw pen or ruler... It hits my head ... I told him off to not do that again case it might affect my eye...

Interpretrator · 10-20-2007, 02:02 PM

Do not ever, ever pretend to be deaf if you aren't.

(I don't mean signing with hearing friends or going "voice off" at events or that kind of thing, of course.)

GarnetTigerMom · 10-20-2007, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pek1

I also forgot to add . . . don't sneak up behind me and scare me. It'll work or I may see movement from behind me through a reflection. I do get jumpy, so it's best not to sneak up and scare me.

OH GOD! I hate that too,, whenever a friend or a family member sneak up behind me I end up jumping out of my skin screaming LOL Damn I really don't like that! lol I was ready to deck them! lol

Cheri · 10-20-2007, 02:49 PM

I also don't like it when hearing people rolled their eyes nor saying "never mind" "forget it" if they have to repeated a sentence, have some patiences, that's all it takes.

GarnetTigerMom · 10-20-2007, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cheri

I also don't like it when hearing people rolled their eyes nor saying "never mind" "forget it" if they have to repeated a sentence, have some patiences, that's all it takes.

True, but deaf people do that too. But deaf people also says "Whatever" their famous words lol

Cheri · 10-20-2007, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GarnetTigerMom

True, but deaf people do that too.

Oh really?? Lol! I haven't done that myself.

Quote:

But deaf people also says "Whatever" their famous words lol

I believe it because I've said "whatever" at times too.

GarnetTigerMom · 10-20-2007, 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cheri

Oh really?? Lol! I haven't done that myself.

I believe it because I've said "whatever" at times too.

LOL lots of time I do say " whatever, so what, who cares!" lol and roll my eyes back and say " I see dear" lol

Lavender · 10-20-2007, 04:32 PM

Don't tap me too much repeatedly. One time is good enuff until I do finish my work then I will look at u. If I don't return after u wait that long then tap me again. Don't burden on my shoulder. Just be lightened.

If I don't wear my ha's, don't check on my ears after u scream to get my attention, ask me to wear ha's on.

Don't ask me to do interpreter for u all day long. u can do write down talkin to hearing.

Don't test on my ha's to see if I can hear u or not.

When I am talking to hearing, don't ask me Q. what did he say?

Hoh's don't like rapidly flicking the light too much if u do that makes me panic tho that was emergency given me heart attack. Just switch one/two times that's good enuff.

***VamPyroX*** · 10-21-2007, 03:12 AM

It's annoying when deaf people make noises to get another deaf person's attention... seriously, that other person is DEAF... they aren't going to HEAR you! What's the point of making noises if they can't hear?

This happens a lot at NTID. I'll be sitting there in LBJ and students suddenly start yelling with "HOOT!" or "WHOOT!" or "AHH!" or whatever. I look at whoever is yelling and see that the person they're yelling at is still walking away. Duh... he's deaf. Simply run ofter him or let him go... depending on how important it is to get his attention.

Buffalo · 10-21-2007, 03:46 AM

I just remember one more thing that was on other thread....when talking to a deaf person (speaking slowly or signing) and a hearing person interrupted your conversation, don't turn to talk to the hearing person without signing... you know, continuing talking to the hearing person as if the deaf person isn't there. I consider that very rude.

shel90 · 10-21-2007, 07:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buffalo

I just remember one more thing that was on other thread....when talking to a deaf person (speaking slowly or signing) and a hearing person interrupted your conversation, don't turn to talk to the hearing person without signing... you know, continuing talking to the hearing person as if the deaf person isn't there. I consider that very rude.

That is a big one! My husband's family does that. One of these days I am gonna make a scene about it cuz I kept reminding them not to do that and yet they still do that.

Kris · 10-21-2007, 09:30 AM

I really like this thread too. I am hearing and this is really helpful. It seems that everyone has a different way they liked to be approached. Is there one general way that most deaf people prefer to get there attention and start a conversation.

Also would you find it distracting or rude if a hearing person uses some sign language while speaking to you. I am learning ASL but I am just starting so am far from fluent. In order to get better I practice but was wondering if in a conversation it was ok to use the limited signs I know or if that would confuse or annoy you.

Kaitin · 10-21-2007, 10:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shel90

Pls do not much so much focus on our ability to speak like "Wow!!! u can talk!" "U must be so smart for u to be able to talk so good!"

I suggest maybe make a nice comment but dont go on and on and on about it.

Agree. But maybe no comments because many I think mean a nice comment and are embarassing or rude. Hearing people: Silence is better maybe!

shel90 · 10-21-2007, 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kaitin

Agree. But maybe no comments because many I think mean a nice comment and are embarassing or rude. Hearing people: Silence is better maybe!

I dont mind the questions on how I learned to speak despite having a severe profound hearing loss in both ears since birth. It would give me an opportunity to emphasize that even though I can speak well and all that, it doesnt mean I can hear everything that is being said.

I just dont like those gushing kinds of comments about my oral skills especially if they go on and on like it is a miracle or something.

Kaitin · 10-21-2007, 10:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kris

Also would you find it distracting or rude if a hearing person uses some sign language while speaking to you. I am learning ASL but I am just starting so am far from fluent. In order to get better I practice but was wondering if in a conversation it was ok to use the limited signs I know or if that would confuse or annoy you.

No. My male roommate knows some signs but not ASL really. He signs sometimes when he talks. Usually he signs the subject or "right" or "ok" (his favorite sign -

- just nod or use your face, ok?

). For example he will ask about a book and sign "book". Or ask to borrow a pen and then "ok?" (no - don't borrow all my pens!

). It helps and I don't find it distracting or rude. But we are friends at our aparment, not strangers in public.

Kaitin · 10-21-2007, 11:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Buffalo

I just remember one more thing that was on other thread....when talking to a deaf person (speaking slowly or signing) and a hearing person interrupted your conversation, don't turn to talk to the hearing person without signing... you know, continuing talking to the hearing person as if the deaf person isn't there. I consider that very rude.

AGREE. My family does and I hate it. My mom doesn't, but everyone else does. My mom signs everything.

Interpretrator · 10-21-2007, 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kaitin

Agree. But maybe no comments because many I think mean a nice comment and are embarassing or rude. Hearing people: Silence is better maybe!

I would definitely follow the deaf person's lead on this. I remember interpreting for a student with whom I had been in many classes, had lots of conversations, knew her for years, etc. Never once heard her use her voice for anything.

One day in class, discussion turned to deafness and deaf culture so she was doing a little PR

I tried not to have any expression on my face because I was so surprised to hear her talk after all this time! But I didn't want her to feel bad due to my reaction (even though it was positive) so I just kept my terp face on. However, when she was done answering people's questions, she turned to me and asked "Was my voice okay?" Then I felt okay telling her what a beautiful voice she had. Which may not have been ethically appropriate but what was I going to say? "On the basis of the Code of Ethics I cannot answer that question?" She really wanted to know since she hadn't used her voice in so long, and it really was beautiful.

Dixie · 10-23-2007, 08:40 PM

Oh yeah - if you KNOW Im deaf in one ear - please don't speak into the ear that has no HA in it, speak into the ear that has the HA in it!

This happened today at work when my ear bud fell out of my left ear - the one Im completely deaf in - people kept walking up and start talking in that ear - one actually screamed in it, I had no idea they were screaming at me until the lady across from me started giving me funny looks like WTF? Then I turned around and jumped out of my skin when person A was standing right there face to face.

10-20-2007, 09:31 AM	#33 (permalink)
shel90 Sun Whorshipper Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: A Desert Rat that has found herself in Maryland Posts: 13,806 Blog Entries: 1	Pls do not much so much focus on our ability to speak like "Wow!!! u can talk!" "U must be so smart for u to be able to talk so good!" I suggest maybe make a nice comment but dont go on and on and on about it. __________________ ~Shel~

10-20-2007, 11:46 AM	#36 (permalink)
Liebling:-))) Hiiiiiii it's meeeeee Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Germany Posts: 24,911	Good thread I own flash lighting outlets in my household. You can see that exact picture what I have in my house... See the red arrow of black figure stand - Alarm... "call us"... It annoys me when my boys are upstair and we are downstair... They are too lazy to call us from upstair so they press the "Alarm" button to tell us to come up to them... They did it sometimes... They said to me that we did the same thing to call with our voice to them from upstair when they are downstair... It annoy them, too... It make no difference... I told them that flash lighting for long 30 seconds everywhere in my house bothers me... The light flashing continue for long 30 seconds when they press the Alarm button. Everyone will think we are and play with flash camera everywhere in my house when they see continue flash lights from windows... We made for use emergency if I call them with voice as same as they press the alarm button... until we agreed Arrrrghhh... __________________ sniffing you

10-20-2007, 02:49 PM	#41 (permalink)
Cheri Premium Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: All I wanted was a white knight with a good heart, soft touch, fast horse, ride me off into the sunset Posts: 20,231	I also don't like it when hearing people rolled their eyes nor saying "never mind" "forget it" if they have to repeated a sentence, have some patiences, that's all it takes. __________________

10-20-2007, 04:32 PM	#45 (permalink)
Lavender Registered User Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 373	Don't tap me too much repeatedly. One time is good enuff until I do finish my work then I will look at u. If I don't return after u wait that long then tap me again. Don't burden on my shoulder. Just be lightened. If I don't wear my ha's, don't check on my ears after u scream to get my attention, ask me to wear ha's on. Don't ask me to do interpreter for u all day long. u can do write down talkin to hearing. Don't test on my ha's to see if I can hear u or not. When I am talking to hearing, don't ask me Q. what did he say? Hoh's don't like rapidly flicking the light too much if u do that makes me panic tho that was emergency given me heart attack. Just switch one/two times that's good enuff. __________________

10-21-2007, 03:12 AM	#46 (permalink)
*VamPyroX* bloody phreak from hell Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Hell Posts: 26,599	It's annoying when deaf people make noises to get another deaf person's attention... seriously, that other person is DEAF... they aren't going to HEAR you! What's the point of making noises if they can't hear? This happens a lot at NTID. I'll be sitting there in LBJ and students suddenly start yelling with "HOOT!" or "WHOOT!" or "AHH!" or whatever. I look at whoever is yelling and see that the person they're yelling at is still walking away. Duh... he's deaf. Simply run ofter him or let him go... depending on how important it is to get his attention. __________________ Check out my city... CLICK HERE! (If you already visited yesterday, visit again today!)

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10-20-2007, 11:26 AM	#35 (permalink)
Kaitin Registered User Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 845 Blog Entries: 23	I like this thread! Don't say with every sentence "do you understand?" or "did you hear me?". Our neighbor at my parents house does and I avoid her. Every sentence. Again and again. I want to say "Stop! Do you understand?".

10-20-2007, 02:02 PM	#39 (permalink)
Interpretrator Crime fighter Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 1,413	Do not ever, ever pretend to be deaf if you aren't. (I don't mean signing with hearing friends or going "voice off" at events or that kind of thing, of course.)

10-21-2007, 03:46 AM	#47 (permalink)
Buffalo Labra lege! Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 1,257	I just remember one more thing that was on other thread....when talking to a deaf person (speaking slowly or signing) and a hearing person interrupted your conversation, don't turn to talk to the hearing person without signing... you know, continuing talking to the hearing person as if the deaf person isn't there. I consider that very rude. __________________ It isn't that they can't see the solution. It is that they can't see the problem. - Gilbert Chesterton

10-21-2007, 09:30 AM	#49 (permalink)
Kris Registered User Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Chicago Posts: 29	I really like this thread too. I am hearing and this is really helpful. It seems that everyone has a different way they liked to be approached. Is there one general way that most deaf people prefer to get there attention and start a conversation. Also would you find it distracting or rude if a hearing person uses some sign language while speaking to you. I am learning ASL but I am just starting so am far from fluent. In order to get better I practice but was wondering if in a conversation it was ok to use the limited signs I know or if that would confuse or annoy you.

10-23-2007, 08:40 PM	#55 (permalink)
Dixie Darren Hayes, Aussie Boi Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Arkansas Posts: 3,656	Oh yeah - if you KNOW Im deaf in one ear - please don't speak into the ear that has no HA in it, speak into the ear that has the HA in it! This happened today at work when my ear bud fell out of my left ear - the one Im completely deaf in - people kept walking up and start talking in that ear - one actually screamed in it, I had no idea they were screaming at me until the lady across from me started giving me funny looks like WTF? Then I turned around and jumped out of my skin when person A was standing right there face to face. __________________ Visit my Deaf Blog Signature banner created by me, please do not steal!