deaf people should get ALONG with hearing people - Page 2

shel90 · 05-21-2007, 10:04 PM

3 or 4 years ago, I played in the NSAD tourney in Clearwater, FLA. My grandfather lived there so he and his wife wanted to come and watch us play. What my grandfather didnt realize that he had to pay to watch me play so at the concession stand to get the wrist bands, he was told that he had to pay. The deaf guy was very polite and patient with him but my grandfather (yes he is hearing) got all pissy and started flailing his arms and yelling at the deaf people at the stand. He was pissed that he had to pay $5 to watch me play. I thought that was rude of him to do that but the deaf people remained gracious and apologized to him. I was impressed with how they handled my grandfather cuz so many of my family members cant handle his tempers with that kind of calmness. I paged my mom and told her about it and she was like "I am not surprised..nothing new."

Maybe it seems like more deaf people are rude cuz there are less of us and more noticeable but there are just as many rude hearing people.

Yes, we all need to take the time to be nice and polite with each other. Even myself, I have my bad days but I am very polite and nice in general.

IslandGal · 05-21-2007, 10:23 PM

Oh please......some hearing people are rude to us deafies too. It goes both ways. How about hearing people should get ALONG with deaf people likewise??

05-21-2007, 10:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rjr2006

We, deaf people need to change our ways, and change them NOW!

It has nothing to do with being deaf. Rude people need to work on their manners. People who want respect need to give respect. It's common sense, and it goes for everyone.

IslandGal · 05-21-2007, 10:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vrsterp

It has nothing to do with being deaf. Rude people need to work on their manners. People who want respect need to give respect. It's common sense, and it goes for everyone.

PePe LePew · 05-22-2007, 12:46 AM

I agree with your points, I'm hearing impaired I got treated badly by hearing too, yes I was with the wrong people at the wrong time at the wrong place and yes it's true deaf has treated me badly also...

To this points I have learned how to choose my friends carefully and knows who my true friend are...

I've experienced mean, ugly, spiteful and hateful people I used to hanged around either culture, it's not easy to find the right friends...Truly I've noticed that deaf and some hearing impaired has no good manners and are rude, I've been taughted how to says thank you, have good manners and not to be rude to people, I had a good strong stricted parents who taughted me right from wrong and I'am thankful they did, but I find it shocked that I talked to this deaf girl, she was really rude, she hurted my feelings and had bad manners, truly not onlys deaf, hearings too.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alex

I don't know if it's me but I find most hearing people to be more friendly than deaf people.

P.S. Don't attack me for saying that.

deafskeptic · 05-22-2007, 07:03 PM

There are days when I think the hearing behave as if they've been raised in a barn. I get like that when some chinese takeout order refuses my order when I call via relay or when some saleperson spoke to my parents instead of me when I wanted to buy a DVD. I hate it when my parents discounts a deaf person's advice even when it's sounder than the advice by the hearing person.

I've also been on the receiving end of some ill mannered deafies who act rude when they realize that ASL isn't my first language or when they make fun of me signing with a rather strong English 'accent' for want of a better word. Can't please everyone. *shrug*

As a rule, I like to think deafies have better manners than hearies.

jillio · 05-22-2007, 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafskeptic

There are days when I think the hearing behave as if they've been raised in a barn. I get like that when some chinese takeout order refuses my order when I call via relay or when some saleperson spoke to my parents instead of me when I wanted to buy a DVD. I hate it when my parents discounts a deaf person's advice even when it's sounder than the advice by the hearing person.

I've also been on the receiving end of some ill mannered deafies who act rude when they realize that ASL isn't my first language or when they make fun of me signing with a rather strong English 'accent' for want of a better word. Can't please everyone. *shrug*

As a rule, I like to think deafies have better manners than hearies.

That's been my experience. As a group, hearing people are extremely intolerant and sel centered.

shel90 · 05-22-2007, 09:06 PM

Todat, when my daughter's game ended, I was waiting for her to get all her stuff together and my ex hubby was nearby. He waved at me so I waved back and just being polite, I started talking to him about the funny things that happened at the game. U know just breaking the ice and trying to be funny but while I was in the middle of the 2nd sentence, he tirned around to jump into a converation the other parents were having. I wasn't finished and it was just plain rude. Not the first time that hearing people have done that. Shud I say thank u or f*ck u? I felt like I wasn't taken seriously or not worthy of their time.

I try hard to chat with the other hearing parents at the games instead of sitting back and isolating myself. Some of them treat me with respect but others don't just like my ex did today.

I think it is rude of hearing people to do that..jump into other conversations they overheard while I am talking. Big turn off but I don't make a big fuss about it. Just like other rude deaf people turning away to talk to other deaf people while I am signing something to them. My coworker has a bad habit of doing that to everyone so many people at work gossip about how rude that is.

R2D2 · 05-22-2007, 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafskeptic

There are days when I think the hearing behave as if they've been raised in a barn. I get like that when some chinese takeout order refuses my order when I call via relay or when some saleperson spoke to my parents instead of me when I wanted to buy a DVD. I hate it when my parents discounts a deaf person's advice even when it's sounder than the advice by the hearing person.

I've also been on the receiving end of some ill mannered deafies who act rude when they realize that ASL isn't my first language or when they make fun of me signing with a rather strong English 'accent' for want of a better word. Can't please everyone. *shrug*

As a rule, I like to think deafies have better manners than hearies.

Actually, I think we all act like we've been raised in a barn when confronted with something we are not used to. It's a typical human trait, not necessarily worse in one group or another. I've found some deaf people to be very racist for example, however I don't attribute that to the fact that they are deaf. It's more that people simply are not educated about something they are not used to.

TFWFalcon · 05-22-2007, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shel90

Todat, when my daughter's game ended, I was waiting for her to get all her stuff together and my ex hubby was nearby. He waved at me so I waved back and just being polite, I started talking to him about the funny things that happened at the game. U know just breaking the ice and trying to be funny but while I was in the middle of the 2nd sentence, he tirned around to jump into a converation the other parents were having. I wasn't finished and it was just plain rude. Not the first time that hearing people have done that. Shud I say thank u or f*ck u? I felt like I wasn't taken seriously or not worthy of their time.

I try hard to chat with the other hearing parents at the games instead of sitting back and isolating myself. Some of them treat me with respect but others don't just like my ex did today.

I think it is rude of hearing people to do that..jump into other conversations they overheard while I am talking. Big turn off but I don't make a big fuss about it. Just like other rude deaf people turning away to talk to other deaf people while I am signing something to them. My coworker has a bad habit of doing that to everyone so many people at work gossip about how rude that is.

understand how you feel exact same happen to me when I start conversations with my hearing friend did jump off to other group even I am not finishing talk. PFFFTTTT......few minutes later he ask me what you recent said?. I told him too bad it is gone. LOL he is little pissed but no big deal.

Silentwolfdog · 05-23-2007, 01:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shel90

Todat, when my daughter's game ended, I was waiting for her to get all her stuff together and my ex hubby was nearby. He waved at me so I waved back and just being polite, I started talking to him about the funny things that happened at the game. U know just breaking the ice and trying to be funny but while I was in the middle of the 2nd sentence, he tirned around to jump into a converation the other parents were having. I wasn't finished and it was just plain rude. Not the first time that hearing people have done that. Shud I say thank u or f*ck u? I felt like I wasn't taken seriously or not worthy of their time.

I try hard to chat with the other hearing parents at the games instead of sitting back and isolating myself. Some of them treat me with respect but others don't just like my ex did today.

I think it is rude of hearing people to do that..jump into other conversations they overheard while I am talking. Big turn off but I don't make a big fuss about it. Just like other rude deaf people turning away to talk to other deaf people while I am signing something to them. My coworker has a bad habit of doing that to everyone so many people at work gossip about how rude that is.

People look away before I finish my sentence always drove me crazy especially if it's my family. I would force my parent to look at me again so that I can finish what I was saying even though parent knew what I was talking about. I don't care if it's a last word I need to get across lol. But if it's with people other than my family members, there's not much I can do about it. I know I did the same thing to them too.

I just don't like people stop my conversation to talk to the person I was talking to. It's easier for them to stop my conversation because I was signing, and it's natural thing for hearing people to listen to sound first, so they would turn around and listen to them instead. *shrug* It's something I don't really hold grudge over. Why get mad over things like this, I have a better things to do with my time, right?

***VamPyroX*** · 05-23-2007, 02:07 AM

I've had deaf people degrade me because I'm "not deaf enough" for them.

Sometimes, I feel that I am over-educated... since some deaf women won't date me cuz I'm "too smart" or they know they can't outsmart me.

Blade Runner · 05-23-2007, 02:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alex

I don't know if it's me but I find most hearing people to be more friendly than deaf people.

P.S. Don't attack me for saying that.

I share the same observation as you.

Blade Runner · 05-23-2007, 02:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VamPyroX

I hate to agree, but I've noticed that it's true.

While hearing people may not be very understanding of deaf-related issues, they do show enough respect than a lot of deaf people I know.

If something doesn't go in the way of a deaf person, that deaf person is likely to get pissy or yell back about it.

I've seen deaf people treat hearing people horribly by talking in sign language and refusing to even use pen-&-paper for communication if an interpreter isn't available.

I would have to agree because I've seen some NTID students treat hearing students horribly such as at the Dining Commons.

Blade Runner · 05-23-2007, 02:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VamPyroX

I've had deaf people degrade me because I'm "not deaf enough" for them.

Sometimes, I feel that I am over-educated... since some deaf women won't date me cuz I'm "too smart" or they know they can't outsmart me.

Same thing happened to me.

Liebling:-))) · 05-23-2007, 04:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vrsterp

It has nothing to do with being deaf. Rude people need to work on their manners. People who want respect need to give respect. It's common sense, and it goes for everyone.

Yes I second that.

It's manner behavior, not hearing or deafness.

Liebling:-))) · 05-23-2007, 05:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alex

I don't know if it's me but I find most hearing people to be more friendly than deaf people.

P.S. Don't attack me for saying that.

I has no idea since I am not an American.

I have seen a lot of deafies and hearies know how to behave in manner way or not. It depends on people's behavior, not just deafies or hearies. Is it sound that there're many deafies behave bad manner like this in America?

I have some hearing Americans who didn't know how to behave manner... (I work with them everyday) - I doesn't mean that Americans are number one who behave bad manner in the world but Germans and other natives in different countries as well.

Liebling:-))) · 05-23-2007, 05:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rjr2006

I'm very sorry you feel that way. I am the last of 7 adopted children from India. I am a quadriplegic and profoundly deaf from birth! I can hear nothing. I am 21 years old and have struggled through school in regular classes. I learned that the only way to get along in life is to reach out and treat all people politely and respectfully even when they are mean back to me. I hope that you will come to see that treating people with respect is the only way to live together in this world. Be well, and try to be happy with yourself and all people. If all else fails, just smile

Please know that we can teach the hearing world how to see us and accept us, the hearing world has much to learn and we can teach them by our example!

I love your post...

Liebling:-))) · 05-23-2007, 05:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PuyoPiyo

Well maybe deaf people didn't reply to other hearing people in the public very much because they can't communicate with them or if they signs, then hearing people will stare at them like they are from Mars.

Very true.

I have a co-worker who told me that hearing co-workers are scared and don't know how to communicate with me. I was like wow because I alway make first move to communicate with them about work issues. It shows their ignorant when they want to question me then get my co-worker to interpret me for them...

I alway said "thank you" when they give cakes or something out... They can say "thank you" to me as well... because it's simple word...

Liebling:-))) · 05-23-2007, 05:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by R2D2

I don't think it's as easy as all that. Some deaf people find it very hard to communicate with hearing people and as such, they will avoid as much contact as they can if they don't know them. Plus, some hearing people can be very rude and impatient with deaf people if they do not understand what is being said straightaway. Those sighs, rolled eyes etc can be soul destroying for a deaf person.

Yes it's an exact how I feel.

I can see that many deafies have the problem with self-confidence for try to communicate with hearies after bad experience with hearies in the past.

I never forget how bad experience I had with hearies co-workers as I promoted to work for them in 1987 to 1992. They complaint to supersivor about me for nerves them with my eyes. I was like

when Supersivor told me off for my "harrassment" behavior. I told him that I only have eyes then I can read or see. He said NOTHING and apologied me afterward. I was like wow because I never had problem with my old job because they understood that I cannot hear but read their lips. Unfortunlately co-workers can't accept it... complaint, complaint... how I got mobbing by horrible co-workers how to drive me nervous breakdown. Work Council moved me to other Division in 1992. They are nice to me but I lost my good self-confidence and aviod to talk or look at them but depend on my work... Some co-workers complaint to her that I am an unfriendly and odd person since they moved me in their division. Thanks to my ex-supersivor and ex co-workers for destory my good self-esteem. My co-worker move on and talk to me and question me .... I feel better and warn her that I only have eyes etc... She was like

and said of course she know that I only have eyes then I can read and see anything. I told her everything... We work together in the same office for over 15 years now. She can do sign language...

Liebling:-))) · 05-23-2007, 06:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IslandGal

Oh please......some hearing people are rude to us deafies too. It goes both ways. How about hearing people should get ALONG with deaf people likewise??

Exactly.

Each person is different, not just hearies, deafies or whatever.

We deal with my both son's horrible and disrespectful principal at school. Oh Well

jillio · 05-23-2007, 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shel90

Todat, when my daughter's game ended, I was waiting for her to get all her stuff together and my ex hubby was nearby. He waved at me so I waved back and just being polite, I started talking to him about the funny things that happened at the game. U know just breaking the ice and trying to be funny but while I was in the middle of the 2nd sentence, he tirned around to jump into a converation the other parents were having. I wasn't finished and it was just plain rude. Not the first time that hearing people have done that. Shud I say thank u or f*ck u? I felt like I wasn't taken seriously or not worthy of their time.

I try hard to chat with the other hearing parents at the games instead of sitting back and isolating myself. Some of them treat me with respect but others don't just like my ex did today.

I think it is rude of hearing people to do that..jump into other conversations they overheard while I am talking. Big turn off but I don't make a big fuss about it. Just like other rude deaf people turning away to talk to other deaf people while I am signing something to them. My coworker has a bad habit of doing that to everyone so many people at work gossip about how rude that is.

Personally, I would reccommend the f*ck u!

lilylover72 · 05-23-2007, 01:04 PM

I can get along with hearing people. I have problem with them because I always call and ask for visit and chat. I always intive them to go somewhere. They never call me to visit and chat, or intive me. They never come to my house to chat. I always go their house to chat. I found out that they intived their own hearing people. Deaf People do same thing. I had to call deaf girls to intive them to chat or do something. They always cancel our plan last min. I am only one person to go hearing people's place or deaf people's place. why should I complain about i should get along with hearing people that I am pure deaf?

In my all life, I never complain that I have to write a note to talk to hearing people. They complain that their hand hurt. I said look, did I ask you to learn sign language and did you ask me to learn read lip? They said no. I said then accept to write so we are even. They were speechless.

Hearing and Deaf human are same! no different!

lilylover72 · 05-23-2007, 01:08 PM

I forget add, My son have hearing friends from school. His friends's parent dont like me because i am deaf. They don't allow them sleep over my house and play with my son. They don't let my son sleep over their house also. I am so sorry for my son. My husband told him that Please dont against me about being deaf. My son really love me and accpet who am I. I told him that I cannot control his fiends's parent. Also I told him that he will get older, he can able go out with friends so their parent cannot do anything. I think it is not fair for him or me because he see his friends sleep over at other friend's house. That is suck!

05-21-2007, 10:04 PM	#31 (permalink)
shel90 Sun Whorshipper Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: A Desert Rat that has found herself in Maryland Posts: 16,119 Blog Entries: 1	3 or 4 years ago, I played in the NSAD tourney in Clearwater, FLA. My grandfather lived there so he and his wife wanted to come and watch us play. What my grandfather didnt realize that he had to pay to watch me play so at the concession stand to get the wrist bands, he was told that he had to pay. The deaf guy was very polite and patient with him but my grandfather (yes he is hearing) got all pissy and started flailing his arms and yelling at the deaf people at the stand. He was pissed that he had to pay $5 to watch me play. I thought that was rude of him to do that but the deaf people remained gracious and apologized to him. I was impressed with how they handled my grandfather cuz so many of my family members cant handle his tempers with that kind of calmness. I paged my mom and told her about it and she was like "I am not surprised..nothing new." Maybe it seems like more deaf people are rude cuz there are less of us and more noticeable but there are just as many rude hearing people. Yes, we all need to take the time to be nice and polite with each other. Even myself, I have my bad days but I am very polite and nice in general. __________________ ~Shel~ "A child educated only at school is an uneducated child." -George Santayana

05-22-2007, 07:03 PM	#36 (permalink)
deafskeptic AAACCK! I got BORGED! Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 2,450	There are days when I think the hearing behave as if they've been raised in a barn. I get like that when some chinese takeout order refuses my order when I call via relay or when some saleperson spoke to my parents instead of me when I wanted to buy a DVD. I hate it when my parents discounts a deaf person's advice even when it's sounder than the advice by the hearing person. I've also been on the receiving end of some ill mannered deafies who act rude when they realize that ASL isn't my first language or when they make fun of me signing with a rather strong English 'accent' for want of a better word. Can't please everyone. shrug As a rule, I like to think deafies have better manners than hearies. __________________ Left ear implanted with Med-El on April 24 2007. Activated on May 9th.

05-22-2007, 09:06 PM	#38 (permalink)
shel90 Sun Whorshipper Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: A Desert Rat that has found herself in Maryland Posts: 16,119 Blog Entries: 1	Todat, when my daughter's game ended, I was waiting for her to get all her stuff together and my ex hubby was nearby. He waved at me so I waved back and just being polite, I started talking to him about the funny things that happened at the game. U know just breaking the ice and trying to be funny but while I was in the middle of the 2nd sentence, he tirned around to jump into a converation the other parents were having. I wasn't finished and it was just plain rude. Not the first time that hearing people have done that. Shud I say thank u or f*ck u? I felt like I wasn't taken seriously or not worthy of their time. I try hard to chat with the other hearing parents at the games instead of sitting back and isolating myself. Some of them treat me with respect but others don't just like my ex did today. I think it is rude of hearing people to do that..jump into other conversations they overheard while I am talking. Big turn off but I don't make a big fuss about it. Just like other rude deaf people turning away to talk to other deaf people while I am signing something to them. My coworker has a bad habit of doing that to everyone so many people at work gossip about how rude that is. __________________ ~Shel~ "A child educated only at school is an uneducated child." -George Santayana

05-23-2007, 02:07 AM	#42 (permalink)
*VamPyroX* bloody phreak from hell Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Hell Posts: 27,844	I've had deaf people degrade me because I'm "not deaf enough" for them. Sometimes, I feel that I am over-educated... since some deaf women won't date me cuz I'm "too smart" or they know they can't outsmart me. __________________ Check out my city... CLICK HERE! (If you already visited yesterday, visit again today!)

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05-21-2007, 10:23 PM	#32 (permalink)
IslandGal Hi ya! Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Sunshine State Posts: 4,323	Oh please......some hearing people are rude to us deafies too. It goes both ways. How about hearing people should get ALONG with deaf people likewise??

05-23-2007, 01:04 PM	#53 (permalink)
lilylover72 I love purple! Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: USA Posts: 2,871	I can get along with hearing people. I have problem with them because I always call and ask for visit and chat. I always intive them to go somewhere. They never call me to visit and chat, or intive me. They never come to my house to chat. I always go their house to chat. I found out that they intived their own hearing people. Deaf People do same thing. I had to call deaf girls to intive them to chat or do something. They always cancel our plan last min. I am only one person to go hearing people's place or deaf people's place. why should I complain about i should get along with hearing people that I am pure deaf? In my all life, I never complain that I have to write a note to talk to hearing people. They complain that their hand hurt. I said look, did I ask you to learn sign language and did you ask me to learn read lip? They said no. I said then accept to write so we are even. They were speechless. Hearing and Deaf human are same! no different!