How you know right thing?

Sunshine

Sunshine

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How you know for sure right stay someone, or right leave? Something should know instinct? How decide when both feel right, both feel wrong?
 
I think a lot of times we know in our heart of hearts whether to stay, or whether to go. It's just a question of whether or not you're going to listen...
 
sunny_signs said:
How you know for sure right stay someone, or right leave? Something should know instinct? How decide when both feel right, both feel wrong?
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yup! simple as that.
 
CSign said:
I think a lot of times we know in our heart of hearts whether to stay, or whether to go. It's just a question of whether or not you're going to listen...
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I don't listen to my heart. It's the source of all fuck-ups. I go by logic and wisdom.
 
Also if you can't think of anything to say, then that is also good sign to say nothing at all.
 
I stayed with my first husband for 7, almost 8, years because I believed in my vows. But my spirit was dying. Whenever I tried to vent, people would tell me, but he's so nice. He has a good job and works hard for his family. He goes to church, etc. So, I would feel guilty because I felt maybe I was expecting too much from him. But what he was doing, behind closed doors,.people didn't know. And one day, I had to leave or I would be dead. So I left. It was hard and easy at the same time. I felt like I betrayed God's vows, my upbringing, and my family values. But I did the right thing. And now I'm much, much happier.
 
Love is patience. Love is kind. Love is not selfishness. Love does not hurt, demean, or embarrass. Love is gentle. Love is sharing. Love is reciprocal.

Love is NOT an emotion. It is an action.
 
  1. does he make you happy?
  2. is he reliable?
  3. do you both have a lot in common?
  4. does he treat you with respect?
  5. is he considerate of your feelings? (not selfish, egotistical, etc)
  6. do you trust him rather than feeling like you have to constantly check up on him, to see if he is not being dishonest?
  7. does he show that he cares about you?

if the answer to ALL questions is yes, then he is the right person for you.
 
also, don't stay with a person if they:

  1. are manipulative and controlling
  2. are not what you want but you believe they will change for you
  3. show that they have no appreciation for you
  4. are a druggie.. like my mom always tells me, "never trust a junkie"
  5. hurt you in any way. love is NOT SUPPOSED to hurt at all
  6. lie. you will never know what to trust
 
You sometimes, go by your heart...If your heart is split, then you ask yourself...Do you really love this person? Can you see yourself without them? Can you see the two of you still together in the future?...Weigh down the pros and cons maybe that should help more too.Hoped I helped some.
 
Much think about here...I break up Dallas, he beg take him back...try decide. Both feel right, both feel wrong. Don't know which should listen to.
 
Common sense should prevail here...not the "but I love him, regardless what he does, says, etc."....

Life is a risk...we take some everyday....it's easy to overlook someone faults when you're "in love and blinded by it"...would not matter if our God above told you not to get involved.....

Plus, the fact is...a lot of people really believe that they can "change" someone...or "hoping" that person will change.....you should always know what you are getting into before taking the big step and planning to spend the rest of your life with someone.....then again...there is no guarantee in Life that it would be the right one...It's the Risk we take...but the Lesson should be learned from it.
 
sunny_signs said:
Much think about here...I break up Dallas, he beg take him back...try decide. Both feel right, both feel wrong. Don't know which should listen to.
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Sunny, you're very young, and it sounds like you've never dated anyone besides Dallas for any length of time, is that right?

Some people do manage to fall in love and stay forever in love with their high-school sweethearts; if that's truly what you have, then count your blessings.

It sounds to me though that you're chafing at the bit to get out, explore life, meet new people, expand your horizons.

It might not have anything to do with Dallas himself, but just your own need to grow, see the world, live on your own for a while, learn who you are as a person before you commit your life to someone else.
 
Clarify: I know age 4. He not figure out until 13. Then we get together. Stay together since, break up twice before now. Short times each. Meant be together? Wrong be apart...
 
I would "spread my wings....and fly"!...It's a big world out there...you may be hanging onto someone who is just a comfort blanket to you....and scared to use your wings and fly a little before committing yourself.
 
It isn't possible to make that kind of decision at age four. See a therapist to help you transition to adulthood and not just sticking with what you have always known.
 
Why not possible? I may not know words age 4 describe feeling, but I know age 4 he make me happy, i love him, he make me feel better just being there. Same feel now.
 
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