Would you date someone with kids? - Page 2

Beach girl · 06-26-2011, 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafbajagal

My current husband told me that if he had to start dating again, he wouldn't date a girl with kids. (I have two girls previously, and both of them adore him. The youngest one calls him Daddy).

Ouch. I don't think my heart will ever heal from that one.

Wow, "like" is really not what I would want to say, but wanted to let you know I noticed this. Why would he say such a thing, do you know?

KStiletto · 06-26-2011, 11:33 PM

Personally I might give dating a guy with one child a chance, and that chance is small. Anything more than one is a no no. If somehow later in my life (twenty years) I am single, and for whatever want love and all the good stuff then it probably wont matter because his kids would be out of the house already. Whey you're older its different. I totally agree on the no bad *ss kids thing.

Grummer · 06-27-2011, 01:59 AM

not just the 'time' or not liking kids, its the ulterior motive which is rampant in NZ lots of young wimmins just want kids nothing else, they prey and **** over men, which is why i dont **** around...literally...i dont trust them...

Steinhauer · 06-27-2011, 02:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jiro

She wanted him out of picture but you don't?

The biological father was not abusive and loved his son very much - why should I replace him?

Steinhauer · 06-27-2011, 02:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shel90

I think he meant that he didnt want anything to do with kicking the father out of the child's life but the mother did by trying to make Steinhaur the father. That is my understanding if I read it correctly.

absolutely correct.

Grummer · 06-27-2011, 02:10 AM

s for bad ass kids, its reflects the parents' past problems, not neccessarily directly but from generation hopping habits...id still stay away...
id i relly really like a gal, and she likes some thing like sport, like motocross, then i might...because Id know how raise the kids into the sport (and out) , and how to reflect the lifestyle with life's dramas and life's perceptions in general. I was *raised* by a motocross tracker owner *as a second dad* outside of the troubled-hearing-snob home with a really old fashioned uptight step father...and in a way i was 'given' a second chance to childhood to learn/respect/enjoy older peoples company as the motocross and attitudes (too!) linked us, Len was a **** , a mean racist, sexist, army-freak asshole im glad had Mort, my own father was a ****wit, worked in mental hospital for way way too long...
blah..i think i said bit too much...

in short of all this, if a gal has kids into motocross or wanting to, and we get along really well, in that circumstance i might give it a go. Not likely to happen its a rare thing for this sort of situation.

Im also saying im no way in ball sports nor can guide the meaning of 'real life' but will motocross i think its in my grasp, maybe computers but that not kids/obvious stuff at all, and id rather keep computers shit away...it WAS my passion i coded in hexicdecimal and its toooo secretive as a language, oh well...(and seemingly impossible generational jump to this sort of obscure language)...
but in general
no, i wouldnt date a woman with kids...

Grummer · 06-27-2011, 02:12 AM

but then again, at my age i probably couldnt avoid that... that sucks but then again.so someone else's kids in the right place would be lovely to bring up...to teach them about life, as I have always thought so much about life as i grew up and i still do, im not a 'careless moron' sort i am a deep thinker and have heart and would love to be proud of bringing up a winner whose benefited from my then-harsh experiences, in other words i wasnt a loser at all, just a stupid chance that life gave me....(is that normal thinking? I hope...)

Steinhauer · 06-27-2011, 02:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shel90

I was lucky that I had a lot of dates after my divorce with men who had no children. I was surprised because I figured that by having a small child (my daughter was 4 at the time), it would be a big turn off.

Sorry to sound blunt, but that is how you seperate the men from the boys. Only a real man will take responsibility of a child, whether it be his, or his bride to be.

My real grandfather was killed as a result of something I would rather not discuss here (related to his WWII experiences). My grandmother was left with 3 children. My father, uncle and aunt. My father was the oldest and was 7 years old. My grandmother was 30 years old when it happened. She eventually started to date again, and met, whom I call, my grandpa. He was a country bumpkin straight off the farm from Kentucky. My grandmother was from Indiana.

He taught us all what it meant to not only be a dad, but a grandpa too. I didn't find out until I was much older that he was my dad's "step dad". He always treated my father like a son, and me, like a grandson. He was always there for us.

deafbajagal · 06-27-2011, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steinhauer

Sorry to sound blunt, but that is how you seperate the men from the boys. Only a real man will take responsibility of a child, whether it be his, or his bride to be.

My real grandfather was killed as a result of something I would rather not discuss here (related to his WWII experiences). My grandmother was left with 3 children. My father, uncle and aunt. My father was the oldest and was 7 years old. My grandmother was 30 years old when it happened. She eventually started to date again, and met, whom I call, my grandpa. He was a country bumpkin straight off the farm from Kentucky. My grandmother was from Indiana.

He taught us all what it meant to not only be a dad, but a grandpa too. I didn't find out until I was much older that he was my dad's "step dad". He always treated my father like a son, and me, like a grandson. He was always there for us.

I love this!

DeafCaroline · 06-27-2011, 09:00 AM

My only issue with dating guys who have kids is when they want to introduce me to their kids right away...I never brought my dates home unless the guy and I had been dating for a long time and even then, we were just friends in front of my boys just in case the relationship didn't work out. I don't want my kids getting attached to anyone who won't be there in 3, 6 or 12 months. It's not fair to them.

warpedpink · 06-27-2011, 10:58 AM

I'm 26 and right now- no I wouldn't but if I fell in love with someone who had kids, I might change my mind

Beach girl · 06-27-2011, 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steinhauer

Sorry to sound blunt, but that is how you seperate the men from the boys. Only a real man will take responsibility of a child, whether it be his, or his bride to be.

My real grandfather was killed as a result of something I would rather not discuss here (related to his WWII experiences). My grandmother was left with 3 children. My father, uncle and aunt. My father was the oldest and was 7 years old. My grandmother was 30 years old when it happened. She eventually started to date again, and met, whom I call, my grandpa. He was a country bumpkin straight off the farm from Kentucky. My grandmother was from Indiana.

He taught us all what it meant to not only be a dad, but a grandpa too. I didn't find out until I was much older that he was my dad's "step dad". He always treated my father like a son, and me, like a grandson. He was always there for us.

For me, too, the only "grandfather" I ever knew was a step-grandpa. My father's mother's first husband died when my dad and his two (at that time) siblings were young. She remarried and had another child. This man, whom we called "Pappa" or "Nonno" (Italian for "grandpa") spoke almost no English, but he had been a wonderful father to my dad, and a dear grandfather to us kids. I remember he taught us how to make a whistle out of birch bark. He also taught us English-speaking grandkids a few words of Italian.

Sadly he died when I was only just barely 6, but he still had managed to create wonderful memories for me and had acted as a "real" grandfather in every way possible.

**shel90** · 06-27-2011, 11:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steinhauer

Sorry to sound blunt, but that is how you seperate the men from the boys. Only a real man will take responsibility of a child, whether it be his, or his bride to be.

My real grandfather was killed as a result of something I would rather not discuss here (related to his WWII experiences). My grandmother was left with 3 children. My father, uncle and aunt. My father was the oldest and was 7 years old. My grandmother was 30 years old when it happened. She eventually started to date again, and met, whom I call, my grandpa. He was a country bumpkin straight off the farm from Kentucky. My grandmother was from Indiana.

He taught us all what it meant to not only be a dad, but a grandpa too. I didn't find out until I was much older that he was my dad's "step dad". He always treated my father like a son, and me, like a grandson. He was always there for us.

That's great!

Grummer · 06-28-2011, 01:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeafCaroline

My only issue with dating guys who have kids is when they want to introduce me to their kids right away...I never brought my dates home unless the guy and I had been dating for a long time and even then, we were just friends in front of my boys just in case the relationship didn't work out. I don't want my kids getting attached to anyone who won't be there in 3, 6 or 12 months. It's not fair to them.

good point

**DoVip** · 07-01-2011, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by warpedpink

I'm 26 and right now- no I wouldn't but if I fell in love with someone who had kids, I might change my mind

well, why don't we date with hangout? but no kids. lol

warpedpink · 07-01-2011, 11:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DoVip

well, why don't we date with hangout? but no kids. lol

Duy? Is that you?

diehardbiker · 07-01-2011, 02:23 PM

Your the man that respects true dad. I would be pissed off if any other man claimed my kids as their own kids.

However when I was younger and kid-free I thought I could take dad role. Now that I have my own kids, I understood it clearly.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steinhauer

The biological father was not abusive and loved his son very much - why should I replace him?

LoveBlue · 07-01-2011, 03:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Glenn

You're a man and a single mother?

I read it too fast also and missed the word WITH, so I know why you asked.

**DoVip** · 07-01-2011, 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by warpedpink

Duy? Is that you?

Hi CK. Long time no see you.

derek7names · 07-01-2011, 04:00 PM

I'm only 19...but I mean when I am older...I probably would.

**Smithtr** · 07-01-2011, 04:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by derek7names

I'm only 19...but I mean when I am older...I probably would.

you not rush because relax take an time your patient

hope be you find out woman!

Don't rush fast!

**KarissaMann05** · 07-01-2011, 04:11 PM

I don't mind to date a single dad.

DeafTim · 07-02-2011, 09:13 PM

I dont have child support and I am thankful for it b/c of the economy.

It would be difficult for me to take care of a man's child b/c it is not my responsibility. I wouldnt want to feed teenage kids.

Aleser · 07-02-2011, 09:22 PM

I've dated someone with 4 children before. It was not a significant factor in liking them, or why the relationship broke up.

I would date someone with children again.

**shel90** · 07-02-2011, 11:05 PM

If I was single, sure I would date a man with children. I love children.

**ash345** · 07-06-2011, 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steinhauer

Sorry to sound blunt, but that is how you seperate the men from the boys. Only a real man will take responsibility of a child, whether it be his, or his bride to be.

My real grandfather was killed as a result of something I would rather not discuss here (related to his WWII experiences). My grandmother was left with 3 children. My father, uncle and aunt. My father was the oldest and was 7 years old. My grandmother was 30 years old when it happened. She eventually started to date again, and met, whom I call, my grandpa. He was a country bumpkin straight off the farm from Kentucky. My grandmother was from Indiana.

He taught us all what it meant to not only be a dad, but a grandpa too. I didn't find out until I was much older that he was my dad's "step dad". He always treated my father like a son, and me, like a grandson. He was always there for us.

thats similar to my dad. he isn't my biological father, but he is my dad. he married my mom when I was 13, and always treated me like his own. When I turned 18 I changed my last name to his, because he is my daddy. with his first wife, he adopted the daughter she already had, then had two more with her. He is the most amazing dad I have ever met, and I can't thank him enough for being my dad. between my mom and dad, there were 6 girls... three from each parent. My dad has never once called me his step-daughter, i've always been his daughter.

daddy.

and as for the original question, if for some reason my partner and I were to split up, I wouldn't have a problem dating someone with a kid, or more than one kid. I actually did before my partner and I got together. Her daughter was 6 months old, and i loved her to pieces.

deafbajagal · 07-08-2011, 05:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ash345

thats similar to my dad. he isn't my biological father, but he is my dad. he married my mom when I was 13, and always treated me like his own. When I turned 18 I changed my last name to his, because he is my daddy. with his first wife, he adopted the daughter she already had, then had two more with her. He is the most amazing dad I have ever met, and I can't thank him enough for being my dad. between my mom and dad, there were 6 girls... three from each parent. My dad has never once called me his step-daughter, i've always been his daughter.

daddy.

and as for the original question, if for some reason my partner and I were to split up, I wouldn't have a problem dating someone with a kid, or more than one kid. I actually did before my partner and I got together. Her daughter was 6 months old, and i loved her to pieces.

You are very lucky. They should never have invented the word "step" when talking about relationships. Blood isn't the only way to have children to be fully and truly your own.

Lantana · 07-12-2011, 05:35 PM

I think your age would be important on how you answer that question. For myself, I would never remarry because of the baggage that people accumiliate. Grown children can create alot of problems in a relationship when older folks choose to remarry. Dating is one thing, remarriage is completely different.

hellos245 · 07-19-2011, 03:25 PM

I would have to say that I would not date anyone with kids.

Frisky Feline · 07-19-2011, 03:33 PM

I have kids. If I were single, then i would date someone who have kids.

06-27-2011, 01:59 AM	#33 (permalink)
Grummer Registered User Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: In the Batcave Posts: 9,544	not just the 'time' or not liking kids, its the ulterior motive which is rampant in NZ lots of young wimmins just want kids nothing else, they prey and ** over men, which is why i dont ** around...literally...i dont trust them... __________________ "Problems cannot be solved at the same level of awareness that created them." Albert Einstein

06-27-2011, 02:10 AM	#36 (permalink)
Grummer Registered User Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: In the Batcave Posts: 9,544	s for bad ass kids, its reflects the parents' past problems, not neccessarily directly but from generation hopping habits...id still stay away... id i relly really like a gal, and she likes some thing like sport, like motocross, then i might...because Id know how raise the kids into the sport (and out) , and how to reflect the lifestyle with life's dramas and life's perceptions in general. I was raised by a motocross tracker owner as a second dad outside of the troubled-hearing-snob home with a really old fashioned uptight step father...and in a way i was 'given' a second chance to childhood to learn/respect/enjoy older peoples company as the motocross and attitudes (too!) linked us, Len was a ** , a mean racist, sexist, army-freak asshole im glad had Mort, my own father was a **wit, worked in mental hospital for way way too long... blah..i think i said bit too much... in short of all this, if a gal has kids into motocross or wanting to, and we get along really well, in that circumstance i might give it a go. Not likely to happen its a rare thing for this sort of situation. Im also saying im no way in ball sports nor can guide the meaning of 'real life' but will motocross i think its in my grasp, maybe computers but that not kids/obvious stuff at all, and id rather keep computers shit away...it WAS my passion i coded in hexicdecimal and its toooo secretive as a language, oh well...(and seemingly impossible generational jump to this sort of obscure language)... but in general no, i wouldnt date a woman with kids... __________________ "Problems cannot be solved at the same level of awareness that created them." Albert Einstein

06-27-2011, 02:12 AM	#37 (permalink)
Grummer Registered User Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: In the Batcave Posts: 9,544	but then again, at my age i probably couldnt avoid that... that sucks but then again.so someone else's kids in the right place would be lovely to bring up...to teach them about life, as I have always thought so much about life as i grew up and i still do, im not a 'careless moron' sort i am a deep thinker and have heart and would love to be proud of bringing up a winner whose benefited from my then-harsh experiences, in other words i wasnt a loser at all, just a stupid chance that life gave me....(is that normal thinking? I hope...) __________________ "Problems cannot be solved at the same level of awareness that created them." Albert Einstein

06-27-2011, 10:58 AM	#41 (permalink)
warpedpink Registered User Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: California Bay Area Posts: 832	I'm 26 and right now- no I wouldn't but if I fell in love with someone who had kids, I might change my mind __________________

07-01-2011, 04:11 PM	#52 (permalink)
KarissaMann05 Premium Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Salem, Oregon Posts: 6,381	I don't mind to date a single dad. __________________ "Pragmatic language is a vital social skill that enables the school-aged child to navigate their way through demanding social situations." -- R. Owens

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06-26-2011, 11:33 PM	#32 (permalink)
KStiletto Registered User Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Brooklyn, NYC Posts: 557	Personally I might give dating a guy with one child a chance, and that chance is small. Anything more than one is a no no. If somehow later in my life (twenty years) I am single, and for whatever want love and all the good stuff then it probably wont matter because his kids would be out of the house already. Whey you're older its different. I totally agree on the no bad *ss kids thing.

06-27-2011, 09:00 AM	#40 (permalink)
DeafCaroline Registered User Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 4,889	My only issue with dating guys who have kids is when they want to introduce me to their kids right away...I never brought my dates home unless the guy and I had been dating for a long time and even then, we were just friends in front of my boys just in case the relationship didn't work out. I don't want my kids getting attached to anyone who won't be there in 3, 6 or 12 months. It's not fair to them.

07-01-2011, 04:00 PM	#50 (permalink)
derek7names Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Inland Empire, California Posts: 137	I'm only 19...but I mean when I am older...I probably would.

07-02-2011, 09:13 PM	#53 (permalink)
DeafTim Registered User Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Utica,OH Posts: 2,327	I dont have child support and I am thankful for it b/c of the economy. It would be difficult for me to take care of a man's child b/c it is not my responsibility. I wouldnt want to feed teenage kids. __________________ It might be,it could be...It is! A homerun! HOLY COW!! Harry Caray Mitt: I have 5 point plan President Obama: Mitt doesnt have 5 point plan, He has one point plan! (ZINGER) Mitt Romney is a scam!!

07-02-2011, 09:22 PM	#54 (permalink)
Aleser Registered User Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 965	I've dated someone with 4 children before. It was not a significant factor in liking them, or why the relationship broke up. I would date someone with children again. __________________ "She thinks... she can make people do what she wants or needs, what is right, by the sheer force of her own talent, not by forcing them... she can teach them and persuade them... that they'll catch it from her. This is still faith in their rationality, in the omnipotence of reason. The mistake? Reason is not automatic. Those who deny it cannot be conquered by it. Do not count on them."

07-02-2011, 11:05 PM	#55 (permalink)
shel90 Let It Snow!!!! Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: A place where crabs are popular Posts: 40,305 Blog Entries: 3	If I was single, sure I would date a man with children. I love children. KristinaB likes this. __________________ "Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it." --- Anonymous

07-12-2011, 05:35 PM	#58 (permalink)
Lantana Registered User Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Oregon Coast/Washington Coast/Hawaii Posts: 400	I think your age would be important on how you answer that question. For myself, I would never remarry because of the baggage that people accumiliate. Grown children can create alot of problems in a relationship when older folks choose to remarry. Dating is one thing, remarriage is completely different. __________________ "The best things in life are not things."

07-19-2011, 03:25 PM	#59 (permalink)
hellos245 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Oregon Posts: 193	I would have to say that I would not date anyone with kids.

07-19-2011, 03:33 PM	#60 (permalink)
Frisky Feline Registered User Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 20,242	I have kids. If I were single, then i would date someone who have kids.

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