Deaf Weddings - How Should They Go?

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converse chick

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well. i'm getting married this fall, and i'm trying to figure out how a deaf wedding should go. my fiancee is hearing, i'm deaf.

for one thing, my fiancee wants his good friend to be the minister [which i do not mind because i am comfortable with him so it would add a nice comfort zone thing to the wedding] but he only knows the alphabet, so this poses a slight problem. would it be strange to have an interpreter [because it would mainly be for me]? did you have an interpreter for yourself?

we are planning on having a small ceremony with, like, 50 guests max. about 10 out of those will be deaf, and much of the rest will not know much sign language.

i have been to very few weddings, all of hearing people. i know how the vows go and everything, but what about things like the part where the couple is supposed to hold hands? i tried googling a typical deaf wedding ceremony but not much came up.

i would love to hear about how your weddings went. i want to hear about how you made your wedding work uniquely for the deaf. i would love some advice, and i will take any tips i can get. i really need some ideas of how to make mine work, especially with the pastor who knows little sign language and such.
 
i did went to few deaf weddings of course the brides and grooms did have hearing ministers who don't know signs and they did hired interperter for them and the guests as well who cares if i were marrying hearing guy i will hired one for me and the deaf guests as well too
 
converse chick said:
How much do professional interpreters generally cost?
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Well if you are concerned with the cost of an interpreter. Do you have a friend that is hearing that can do it for you? One that can take the honor of doing so for you like a part of the bridal party? One of my friends did that. She included her friend in the bridal party like one of her brides maids.

They even rehearsed together and everything. I thought it was awesome.
 
I think reba or someone in Ad has the similar experience in this, I hope they can help!
 
IF i got married somedays i can offered hires interpreter for my own weddings but im not sure its would be cost or not but i knew our interpreter from Arkansas Rehab Services but they can interpreter for us in our own wedding somedays.

my boyfriend is hearing he can sign but he not totally 100% im raise deaf since i was baby at 10 month old.
 
This is really interesting to me. I've never thought of this. But I agree with other people I would hire a friend or relative someone close to ya'll
 
I have recently went to a deaf couple wedding lasst fall. It was a wonderful wedding. They had a freind whom happened to be a professional interpreter and he did a interpreting service for the deaf couple from the chruch all the way to the reception. It was basically a hearing wedding with a deaf couple wanting to get married with mostly deaf bridemaids and deaf groommens. The terp interpreted everything as a gift to the couple which they were very grateful for in exchange the terp was allowed to invite his wife to wedding and eat free food and drinks. So it has worked out for them.

In my sitution, when my wife and I got married, we got married in the church she grew up in and they have a minister who knew how to sign. when there were hearing speech or songs , my sister in law interpreted everything as part of her wedding gift to us.

Basically my advice to you converse chick is realize that poeple hearing or deaf worry about the same thing you are right now. I suggest you to meet with the minister ahead of time to show your concerns and work out a understanding you need facial cues as you go through the marrying process. All ministers and peace of justice know with experience firsthand that people need guidance through marrying process. After you go through it, you will say, hmm how did i manage to do that?

hopefully my experience will give you some heads up what to expect and look for. OH yeah - i almost forgot, congrats on getting engaged!:D the best times only lie ahead.:naughty::D
 
You may need two interpreters...one for yourself right up close so you can see the vows...and then the other one for the deaf people in the audience. If you only hire one interpreter, make sure that person is stationed where everyone can see him/her.

If you have music or prewritten vows, give it to the intepreter(s) so they can practice it before the wedding to make sure it goes smoothly. Also if you have a rehearsal, make sure the same interpreter(s) are there, too, so they can get used to your signing and get used to how the wedding will go.

Good luck. Hope you can post pictures or let us know how it went. :)
 
Congratulation on getting married! I do highly recommend you to hire a terp because this is once-in-a-lifetime experience! What radioman suggested is a brilliant idea.

radioman said:
I have recently went to a deaf couple wedding lasst fall. It was a wonderful wedding. They had a freind whom happened to be a professional interpreter and he did a interpreting service for the deaf couple from the chruch all the way to the reception. It was basically a hearing wedding with a deaf couple wanting to get married with mostly deaf bridemaids and deaf groommens. The terp interpreted everything as a gift to the couple which they were very grateful for in exchange the terp was allowed to invite his wife to wedding and eat free food and drinks. So it has worked out for them.
Click to expand...

You can offer the interpreter and his/her spouse a free food and everything. Or... you can pay him/her. Again - this is once in a lifetime experience so it is good idea to hire one. Don't worry about what the guests would think. :cool2:
 
Depending where the OP lives--I'm sure she can find a deaf preacher even though is comfortable with her fiance's pastor.

Just remember that it is her day too and that she has a right to a communication barrier free wedding...
 
Many of the deaf weddings I have been to, they twirled the napkins instead of tap glasses with fork/spoon. That way the bride and groom can see that people want them to kiss.
 
When I married to my 2nd exh and we are both deaf so I contacted the state to get the interperter for the wedding and it was free due to gift for our wedding and we had that same lady that interpeted our wedding, birth of our son and our son baptised. It was great to have her and we felt comfortable with her.

Contact your local support to get the interper for your wedding.
 
thanks for all the replies! most likely i'm going for an interpreter. i was wondering .. where does the interpreter for the couple stand? because with a hearing wedding, the couple faces each other .. deaf people can't really do that. to be honest, i do attend a church with a deaf pastor, but the wedding won't be held here because we live in different states. nonetheless, i am sure i could find a deaf pastor in his state .. but he really wants his friend to do it, and i don't mind. i'm just working out the kinks now :)
 
When I got married (which was like uhmm 500 years ago?? lol j/k..really 15 yrs ago) my side (groom) of the family was mostly deaf/hard of hearing and is a small family. My wife's side of the family was ALL hearing and is a big big farm family. So...city boy married a country girl! :) My wife is totally deaf and I am hard of hearing/DEAF. We debated on what to do in consideration for both sides of the family. We invited 100 people mixture of deaf and hearing (that's how many invitations we sent out) but 175 people actually showed up. It was a BIG BIG church wedding. Very elaborate wedding since brides parents had "money" ya know...

Anyways....we decided that we needed to have 2 'terps. We needed the interpreters for the rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, wedding, and for the reception. They both were there for all of the events. We had our "personal" interpreter stand really close side by side with the Pastor and interpreted to us the vows...etc etc. We had a 2nd interpreter that was on a little "stage" about 2 or 3 feet higher up above us for the whole congregation to see about 5 feet away from us. The 2nd interpreter interpreted everything from what the Pastor said to us...and what the personal interpreter voiced when we said our vows to each other. We had a musical song called "Always". It's an old old classic song that basically starts out as boyfriend/girlfriends..then married..then kids...then gparents..then golden years..etc. The 2nd interpreter was/is an expert at signing musical songs. Both interpreters then interpreted at the wedding reception. After the cake and wine thing, the interpreters kinda mingled and the hearing family members/friends were told that if they wanted to talk to me or the wife, to find the interpreter since they (the terps) wore a little necklace sign that said "Interpreter" only at the wedding reception. It worked out GREAT from what I heard from my side of the family and deaf friends.

We asked both interpreters what they would like for $$ and they both said its your wedding gifts (since we were really good friends). Personal interpreter was just a recent graduate of ITP and just passed Level 5 level skills. 2nd interpreter was an much older lady who could EASILY pass for a deaf person.

My suggestion to you: If you are going to have deaf people in your wedding, I would get 2 interpreters because it would be really hard/awkward for you to look at only 1 and have the guest peer over trying to see the only interpreter. Having 2 works out great and no stress.

Good luck!! Congratulations on your forthcoming marriage!!
 
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