Men VS. Women in marriage and unmarriage parnter

~♥~Pinky~♥~ · 05-06-2008, 11:21 PM

I want to know about couple Man and woman between. I has been paying on bills a lot. I always handle with bills to remind my fiance to pay half each. He isn't good at remind on bill date. I told him to be responsible to remind on date bill. I am tired of remind him all the times. He think all women do handle with bills only not men. I was alike huh?? I told him how did he learned it from?? He said it from his mom. My mom isn't favorite to handle the bills. My step dad is handle the bills for house and insurance etc. Me and my fiance are pay half each of all bills. I prefer for him to handle on bills like I do. We need to be share and fairly. I don't want to remind him all the times. He have a power brain for school and work a lot. He have a lot of mind to do. If we get marry. I will make him to handle the bills to share with me and pay half. Some he is pay his car insurance. I don't drive. I paid all my medical bills mostly. That's so suck! Do you think all women always handle with the bills or men do handle the bills too?? Do they should be fair or not? What do you think?? I want to see your answer my questions. I will be happy to hear.

jazzy · 05-06-2008, 11:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pinky678

I want to know about couple Man and woman between. I has been paying on bills a lot. I always handle with bills to remind my fiance to pay half each. He isn't good at remind on bill date. I told him to be responsible to remind on date bill. I am tired of remind him all the times. He think all women do handle with bills only not men. I was alike huh?? I told him how did he learned it from?? He said it from his mom. My mom isn't favorite to handle the bills. My step dad is handle the bills for house and insurance etc. Me and my fiance are pay half each of all bills. I prefer for him to handle on bills like I do. We need to be share and fairly. I don't want to remind him all the times. He have a power brain for school and work a lot. He have a lot of mind to do. If we get marry. I will make him to handle the bills to share with me and pay half. Some he is pay his car insurance. I don't drive. I paid all my medical bills mostly. That's so suck! Do you think all women always handle with the bills or men do handle the bills too?? Do they should be fair or not? What do you think?? I want to see your answer my questions. I will be happy to hear.

ohhh I take care of bills because I do it better than my husband. I don't mind it and he does not mind it.

We are one, not half and half so Hus and mine $$$ are ours, not his or mine. We share. I guess marriage is somewhat different than unmarriage unless I am wrong.

jillio · 05-06-2008, 11:36 PM

I think it depends on the man and the woman. Some men are the responsible one in the relationship, some women are the responsible one in the realtionship. Whatever works for the couple.

shel90 · 05-07-2008, 05:37 AM

My husband takes care of his bills and I take care of mine. Makes things easier for us.

Freaky Cat · 05-07-2008, 10:43 AM

when my dad was with my mom, they had a bank account together. I remember dad always wrote checks and it bounced. He never told my mom if he wrote checks or not. he just do it. he doesnt care. My mom get mad and told him why didnt u tell me that you wrote a check for that and what etc. he just yell at my mom..

so from what i have seen my parents.. i didnt want to be like that.. so i prefer to have my own bank account where i can keep track of. so when I was with my husband I took care of my bills and my husband took care of his bills. Sometimes I had to remind him to pay bills as he forget but not always. He didnt like it cuz he want to share bank account till his mom came over and told me we must share bank account.

I told her I prefer to keep the bank accounts separated that way i can make sure it doesnt bounce. My husband's account always bounce. so who knows he may spent all of my money? i dont think so...

My brother had same problem last fall. His wife took all of his money and left to go on vacation supposedly meeting a man from internet. no foods in house, bills not paid, taxes not paid. he have to go work? so my mom gave him some money to pay taxes and gas to go to work. That sucks if it happen to me? forget it. i want to keep my bank account separated.

Sweetpolly · 05-07-2008, 10:50 AM

Just remember, if you are handling the bills,, there will never be the problem of him taking control of you in the money area of the marriage.
I went through that with my ex husband..he controlled all the money and never let me have spending money and I worked and got child support (it was terrible). So, I wouldn't complain because if he doesn't know or doesn't want to handle the money and bills,, they might not get paid. It's just something you agree you will do and don't get upset, just accept it and be happy about the good points about it , instead of complaining that he doesn't do it, because if you make him do it - your finances might get screwed up.
Be happy and smile about it. You Go Girl!

IslandBreeze07 · 05-07-2008, 11:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jillio

I think it depends on the man and the woman. Some men are the responsible one in the relationship, some women are the responsible one in the realtionship. Whatever works for the couple.

I've always kept the books. Whatever works best for the relationship is the thing to do. Sometimes in being fair does not help when the guy's not being upfront with you. So KNOW EVERYTHING! When you keep finances separate, it helps the responsible people manage money. There was a brief time four years ago where my guy wanted to do the books----and I let him. What a disaster! I took back the reins and never to let go. TOO BAD!

~♥~Pinky~♥~ · 05-07-2008, 08:55 PM

I prefer to have my own bank account either. Because of SSDAC. My fiance is paying his own bills on car insurance, payment, and cellphone. We are pay half on apt rent, electric, phone plus high speed internet, and directv. That all. I am sick of medical bills. Yuck! I dislike when some men are control on wives for not spend on money what they need. If I need to buy something from shopping. I have to discuss with my fiance to make a agree before I go shop. He asked me if he would like to buy X Box 360. I told him no! I told him to save money for wedding stuff. He do agree with me. I can't keep my private and not tell him. But he can bust on me for spend on bead stuff from craft store. LoL

shel90 · 05-07-2008, 08:58 PM

My hubby and I dont have a joint bank account. My ex hubby and I did...in my experience, having a joint bank account caused too many problems. So far, keeping our bank accts separate has been great!

Bottesini · 05-07-2008, 10:20 PM

I handle all money. Because I am best at it. My husband and I divide things to do by who does something best. That works well for us.

Maria · 05-07-2008, 11:00 PM

It would be NICEEE to allow a man to handle all the money himself instead of me. I got tired of handling it for these years. I need a break!

And, also it would be soo NICEEE to have some money from him to enjoy what I need for myself. I don't have to worry about being responsible to pay all those bills. Preferably care-free mind. Heh heh

sara1981 · 05-09-2008, 12:01 AM

many million marriages couples have trust in joint bank account for share what needs and never cheat each other! what freaky cat talking about it!

unmarried couples always hard save money for what needs to buy foods,whatevers!

my parents got divorces and not got joint account each other so my parents know what to do separation banks because my parents always shopping foods and clothings,bills,etc.

Miss-Delectable · 05-09-2008, 05:34 AM

Every woman should have her own bank account even when married etc.

As for whom should handle the bills, I would say whoever's the most responsible.

Cheri · 05-09-2008, 06:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss-Delectable

As for whom should handle the bills, I would say whoever's the most responsible.

I agree.

When I was living with my ex of 6 years, he and I would split the bills 50/50, and we had a joint account along with our own accounts, the joint account was to pay bills, our own account was to buy whatever we want with our own money.

deafbajagal · 05-09-2008, 07:50 AM

From my experience, joint bank account is a bad idea. Period. Too much communication must happen...and with the busy lives that most of us have, we don't always have that opportunity to communicate about who spent what. As for paying bills, I trusted my hubby (now ex) to take care of the bills. The result? A mess that I'm still paying (literally) for after all these years.

Cheri · 05-09-2008, 08:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deafbajagal

From my experience, joint bank account is a bad idea. Period. Too much communication must happen...and with the busy lives that most of us have, we don't always have that opportunity to communicate about who spent what.

That's what check books are for, write down what was spend and deposit. I never had any problems when I shared a joint account with my ex of 6 years. He paid some bills and I paid some.

Cowpuppy · 05-09-2008, 08:37 AM

Not sure you were talking about ....money or just writing out the bills and delivery.
Writing and paying....both shoud understand bills and when due how much. That way both can be more on the same page. It keeps us on track. Understanding where money going. Cause less fights about it. It can vary.....sometimes who has more time. Not really a gender issue I think. Clear up before marraige maybe.....lol. It's a red flag.

~♥~Pinky~♥~ · 05-09-2008, 03:29 PM

Ummm What do you think about 3 bank accounts?? it for myself, My fiance's and our both bank account together?? Is that good idea?? Umm We will go to bank next 2 weeks to change my last name. Because I will get marry next month. I am on SSDAC. I have no experience with 3 accounts. I prefer my own bank account. My fiance's own. How about our bank account to pay on bills and saving for a new house?? What do you think? Please answer me. Thank you!

PowerON · 05-09-2008, 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jillio

I think it depends on the man and the woman. Some men are the responsible one in the relationship, some women are the responsible one in the realtionship. Whatever works for the couple.

you're correct. And i shall be your personal account.

and even nosey on what you spend on these. oh my my! you brought new car?!? This car waste more gas! blah blah blah nag nag nag

racheleggert · 05-10-2008, 12:18 AM

For me, I'd rather to have my own bank account no matter whatever even if I get married one day. I do have boyfriend and I only pay my own bills, and he pay own bills since we use different banks. Joint account is never good idea. Seperate account is better because you know what you spent, budget easily, etc.. I would say no thanks to joint account, no thanks..

deafbajagal · 05-10-2008, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cowpuppy

Not sure you were talking about ....money or just writing out the bills and delivery.
Writing and paying....both shoud understand bills and when due how much. That way both can be more on the same page. It keeps us on track. Understanding where money going. Cause less fights about it. It can vary.....sometimes who has more time. Not really a gender issue I think. Clear up before marraige maybe.....lol. It's a red flag.

You're right. People who are planning to get married should sit down and discuss everything before the marriage takes place. It is not a bad idea to see a counselor that deals with money management to give you suggestions, etc. on ways you can handle finances.

Cheri · 05-10-2008, 09:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pinky678

Ummm What do you think about 3 bank accounts?? it for myself, My fiance's and our both bank account together?? Is that good idea?? Umm We will go to bank next 2 weeks to change my last name. Because I will get marry next month. I am on SSDAC. I have no experience with 3 accounts. I prefer my own bank account. My fiance's own. How about our bank account to pay on bills and saving for a new house?? What do you think? Please answer me. Thank you!

You could do that, I had two accounts, one in my name, and one joint account with both of our names. My ex had two accounts also, one in his name and one in our names.

The Highlander · 05-10-2008, 09:21 PM

Lucky for those gold diggers, they actually get what they wanted.

shel90 · 05-10-2008, 09:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by racheleggert

For me, I'd rather to have my own bank account no matter whatever even if I get married one day. I do have boyfriend and I only pay my own bills, and he pay own bills since we use different banks. Joint account is never good idea. Seperate account is better because you know what you spent, budget easily, etc.. I would say no thanks to joint account, no thanks..

I agree with u. My friend was shocked to discover that my hubby and I dont have a joint bank account. She doesnt believe in that..she believes that once u are married, you share everything with your spouse, including bank accounts. She feels that it is a sign of distrust of each other by having separate bank accounts. I told her if she believes strongly about that then why complain about how her husband gets mad at her for spending money on some things and vice versa. LOL!

People believe in that which is fine by me but doesnt mean I have to abide by their rules.

RosesNY · 05-10-2008, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shel90

I agree with u. My friend was shocked to discover that my hubby and I dont have a joint bank account. She doesnt believe in that..she believes that once u are married, you share everything with your spouse, including bank accounts. She feels that it is a sign of distrust of each other by having separate bank accounts. I told her if she believes strongly about that then why complain about how her husband gets mad at her for spending money on some things and vice versa. LOL!

People believe in that which is fine by me but doesnt mean I have to abide by their rules.

Hey Shel90 same here my freind was shock we don't share the bank account she say to me that my hubby and I don't trust each other it not ture we just wants our own account it just easyer for us to pay bills.

Cheri · 05-10-2008, 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RosesNY

Hey Shel90 same here my freind was shock we don't share the bank account she say to me that my hubby and I don't trust each other it not ture we just wants our own account it just easyer for us to pay bills.

It doesn't mean you two don't trust each others, It's your right to have your own separate account as you wish.

05-06-2008, 11:21 PM	#1 (permalink)
~♥~Pinky~♥~ Registered User Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 3,735	Men VS. Women in marriage and unmarriage parnter I want to know about couple Man and woman between. I has been paying on bills a lot. I always handle with bills to remind my fiance to pay half each. He isn't good at remind on bill date. I told him to be responsible to remind on date bill. I am tired of remind him all the times. He think all women do handle with bills only not men. I was alike huh?? I told him how did he learned it from?? He said it from his mom. My mom isn't favorite to handle the bills. My step dad is handle the bills for house and insurance etc. Me and my fiance are pay half each of all bills. I prefer for him to handle on bills like I do. We need to be share and fairly. I don't want to remind him all the times. He have a power brain for school and work a lot. He have a lot of mind to do. If we get marry. I will make him to handle the bills to share with me and pay half. Some he is pay his car insurance. I don't drive. I paid all my medical bills mostly. That's so suck! Do you think all women always handle with the bills or men do handle the bills too?? Do they should be fair or not? What do you think?? I want to see your answer my questions. I will be happy to hear. __________________

05-07-2008, 05:37 AM	#4 (permalink)
shel90 Sun Whorshipper Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: A Desert Rat that has found herself in Maryland Posts: 14,994 Blog Entries: 1	My husband takes care of his bills and I take care of mine. Makes things easier for us. __________________ ~Shel~

05-07-2008, 10:43 AM	#5 (permalink)
Freaky Cat My cat Oreo :) Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: ArKaNsAs Posts: 10,177	when my dad was with my mom, they had a bank account together. I remember dad always wrote checks and it bounced. He never told my mom if he wrote checks or not. he just do it. he doesnt care. My mom get mad and told him why didnt u tell me that you wrote a check for that and what etc. he just yell at my mom.. so from what i have seen my parents.. i didnt want to be like that.. so i prefer to have my own bank account where i can keep track of. so when I was with my husband I took care of my bills and my husband took care of his bills. Sometimes I had to remind him to pay bills as he forget but not always. He didnt like it cuz he want to share bank account till his mom came over and told me we must share bank account. I told her I prefer to keep the bank accounts separated that way i can make sure it doesnt bounce. My husband's account always bounce. so who knows he may spent all of my money? i dont think so... My brother had same problem last fall. His wife took all of his money and left to go on vacation supposedly meeting a man from internet. no foods in house, bills not paid, taxes not paid. he have to go work? so my mom gave him some money to pay taxes and gas to go to work. That sucks if it happen to me? forget it. i want to keep my bank account separated. __________________ When you miss me just look up to the night sky and remember, I'm like a star; sometimes you can't see me, but I'm always there! Freaky Cat's Blog

05-07-2008, 10:50 AM	#6 (permalink)
Sweetpolly Registered User Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 110	Just remember, if you are handling the bills,, there will never be the problem of him taking control of you in the money area of the marriage. I went through that with my ex husband..he controlled all the money and never let me have spending money and I worked and got child support (it was terrible). So, I wouldn't complain because if he doesn't know or doesn't want to handle the money and bills,, they might not get paid. It's just something you agree you will do and don't get upset, just accept it and be happy about the good points about it , instead of complaining that he doesn't do it, because if you make him do it - your finances might get screwed up. Be happy and smile about it. You Go Girl! Last edited by Sweetpolly; 05-07-2008 at 11:06 AM.

05-07-2008, 08:55 PM	#8 (permalink)
~♥~Pinky~♥~ Registered User Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 3,735	I prefer to have my own bank account either. Because of SSDAC. My fiance is paying his own bills on car insurance, payment, and cellphone. We are pay half on apt rent, electric, phone plus high speed internet, and directv. That all. I am sick of medical bills. Yuck! I dislike when some men are control on wives for not spend on money what they need. If I need to buy something from shopping. I have to discuss with my fiance to make a agree before I go shop. He asked me if he would like to buy X Box 360. I told him no! I told him to save money for wedding stuff. He do agree with me. I can't keep my private and not tell him. But he can bust on me for spend on bead stuff from craft store. LoL __________________

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05-06-2008, 11:36 PM	#3 (permalink)
jillio Registered User Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 19,356	I think it depends on the man and the woman. Some men are the responsible one in the relationship, some women are the responsible one in the realtionship. Whatever works for the couple.

05-07-2008, 08:58 PM	#9 (permalink)
shel90 Sun Whorshipper Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: A Desert Rat that has found herself in Maryland Posts: 14,994 Blog Entries: 1	My hubby and I dont have a joint bank account. My ex hubby and I did...in my experience, having a joint bank account caused too many problems. So far, keeping our bank accts separate has been great! __________________ ~Shel~

05-07-2008, 10:20 PM	#10 (permalink)
Bottesini Dragon Slayer Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Don't look back! Posts: 4,417 Blog Entries: 2	I handle all money. Because I am best at it. My husband and I divide things to do by who does something best. That works well for us.

05-07-2008, 11:00 PM	#11 (permalink)
Maria Premium Member Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: FLORIDA Posts: 8,181	It would be NICEEE to allow a man to handle all the money himself instead of me. I got tired of handling it for these years. I need a break! And, also it would be soo NICEEE to have some money from him to enjoy what I need for myself. I don't have to worry about being responsible to pay all those bills. Preferably care-free mind. Heh heh __________________

05-09-2008, 12:01 AM	#12 (permalink)
sara1981 Batista's Fans Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: North Little Rock,Ar Posts: 3,054	many million marriages couples have trust in joint bank account for share what needs and never cheat each other! what freaky cat talking about it! unmarried couples always hard save money for what needs to buy foods,whatevers! my parents got divorces and not got joint account each other so my parents know what to do separation banks because my parents always shopping foods and clothings,bills,etc. __________________

05-09-2008, 05:34 AM	#13 (permalink)
Miss-Delectable Capt Tony Nelson, Jeannie Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: No.1 Shopping Capital in Australia Posts: 8,693 Blog Entries: 3	Every woman should have her own bank account even when married etc. As for whom should handle the bills, I would say whoever's the most responsible. __________________

05-09-2008, 07:50 AM	#15 (permalink)
deafbajagal Jasmine's Tiger "Lilly" Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: USA Posts: 1,885	From my experience, joint bank account is a bad idea. Period. Too much communication must happen...and with the busy lives that most of us have, we don't always have that opportunity to communicate about who spent what. As for paying bills, I trusted my hubby (now ex) to take care of the bills. The result? A mess that I'm still paying (literally) for after all these years. __________________ "The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires." ~Quote by William Arthur Ward

05-09-2008, 08:37 AM	#17 (permalink)
Cowpuppy Banned Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: On The Road Again Posts: 375	Not sure you were talking about ....money or just writing out the bills and delivery. Writing and paying....both shoud understand bills and when due how much. That way both can be more on the same page. It keeps us on track. Understanding where money going. Cause less fights about it. It can vary.....sometimes who has more time. Not really a gender issue I think. Clear up before marraige maybe.....lol. It's a red flag.

05-09-2008, 03:29 PM	#18 (permalink)
~♥~Pinky~♥~ Registered User Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 3,735	Ummm What do you think about 3 bank accounts?? it for myself, My fiance's and our both bank account together?? Is that good idea?? Umm We will go to bank next 2 weeks to change my last name. Because I will get marry next month. I am on SSDAC. I have no experience with 3 accounts. I prefer my own bank account. My fiance's own. How about our bank account to pay on bills and saving for a new house?? What do you think? Please answer me. Thank you! __________________

05-10-2008, 12:18 AM	#20 (permalink)
racheleggert Chode! Chode! Chode! Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Twin Cities, MN Posts: 2,219	For me, I'd rather to have my own bank account no matter whatever even if I get married one day. I do have boyfriend and I only pay my own bills, and he pay own bills since we use different banks. Joint account is never good idea. Seperate account is better because you know what you spent, budget easily, etc.. I would say no thanks to joint account, no thanks.. __________________ PROUD BARACK OBAMA SUPPORTER!

05-10-2008, 09:21 PM	#23 (permalink)
The Highlander Bạnned Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 1,244	Lucky for those gold diggers, they actually get what they wanted. __________________ Z'ha'dum is the homeworld of the Shadows. No one leaves the same as they arrived. --Delenn If you go to Z'ha'dum, you will die. — Kosh to John Sheridan