Hell 95

cloud · 03-03-2003, 07:05 PM

"Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call. I'm not sure
whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously
helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in
America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm
going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let
you decide where you want to go."

Bill replied, "Well, what's the difference between the two?"

God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, to
see if it will help your decision."

"Fine, but where should I go first?" Bill asked.

"I'll leave that up to you." God replied.

"Okay then," said Bill, "let's try Hell first."

So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with
clear waters and lots of long-legged women running around,
playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was
shining; the temperature perfect. He was very pleased.

"This is great," he told God. "If this is hell, I really want to
see Heaven."

"Fine," said God, and off they went.

Heaven was a place high in the clouds, beautiful and sunny, with
angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice,
but not as enticing as Hell.

Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision.

"Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told God.

"Fine," replied God, "as you desire."

So Bill Gates went to Hell.

Two weeks later, God decided to check on the late billionaire to
see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill,
shackled to a wall screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves,
surrounded with heavy thick-legged women and being burned and
tortured by demons, with no one to help him out of his dilemma no
matter how loud he screamed.

"How's everything going?" He asked Bill.

Bill responded with his voice filled with anguish and tormented
disappointment.

"This is awful. This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks
ago. I can't believe this is happening. What happened to that
other place, with the beaches and the long-legged women playing
in the water????"

Oh," God said, "that was Hell 3.1. This is Hell 95."

illustrator · 03-05-2003, 10:57 PM

Hmm... I wonder what Hell 98 would be?

03-06-2003, 02:19 PM

or Hell 2000?

cloud · 03-09-2003, 04:23 PM

Or even Hell XP

illustrator · 03-09-2003, 05:31 PM

And Hell Longhorn!

whodatshroom · 03-11-2003, 12:16 PM

lol shit

cloud · 03-12-2003, 02:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by illustrator
And Hell Longhorn!

And Hell Linux.

***VamPyroX*** · 03-12-2003, 05:37 PM

Poor dude!

Y · 03-12-2003, 06:56 PM

Geez, I've heard of something like a different version...
the last statement was something like "Oh, it was only a demo"...

zkataqurlxx · 03-13-2003, 03:06 PM

ha funni

03-13-2003, 11:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Y
Geez, I've heard of something like a different version...
the last statement was something like "Oh, it was only a demo"...

that version was little better

Y · 03-14-2003, 02:39 PM

ChelEler · 04-10-2003, 12:20 PM

LeviathanC · 04-11-2003, 09:34 AM

He got

t e d d y · 04-11-2003, 10:23 AM

poo bill gates

TygersaidStfu · 04-11-2003, 10:29 AM

wned: but

TygersaidStfu · 04-11-2003, 10:31 AM

03-03-2003, 07:05 PM	#1 (permalink)
cloud Stoner God Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 746	Hell 95 "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go." Bill replied, "Well, what's the difference between the two?" God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, to see if it will help your decision." "Fine, but where should I go first?" Bill asked. "I'll leave that up to you." God replied. "Okay then," said Bill, "let's try Hell first." So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of long-legged women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining; the temperature perfect. He was very pleased. "This is great," he told God. "If this is hell, I really want to see Heaven." "Fine," said God, and off they went. Heaven was a place high in the clouds, beautiful and sunny, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision. "Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told God. "Fine," replied God, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell. Two weeks later, God decided to check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, surrounded with heavy thick-legged women and being burned and tortured by demons, with no one to help him out of his dilemma no matter how loud he screamed. "How's everything going?" He asked Bill. Bill responded with his voice filled with anguish and tormented disappointment. "This is awful. This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago. I can't believe this is happening. What happened to that other place, with the beaches and the long-legged women playing in the water????" Oh," God said, "that was Hell 3.1. This is Hell 95."

03-12-2003, 05:37 PM	#8 (permalink)
*VamPyroX* bloody phreak from hell Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Hell Posts: 27,042	Poor dude! __________________ Check out my city... CLICK HERE! (If you already visited yesterday, visit again today!)

03-12-2003, 06:56 PM	#9 (permalink)
Y Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 3,113	Geez, I've heard of something like a different version... the last statement was something like "Oh, it was only a demo"... __________________

03-14-2003, 02:39 PM	#12 (permalink)
Y Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 3,113	__________________

04-10-2003, 12:20 PM	#13 (permalink)
ChelEler Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 5,538	__________________ -ChelEler- =^.~=

Today
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03-05-2003, 10:57 PM	#2 (permalink)
illustrator Love in Jesus Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Benbrook Posts: 4,594	Hmm... I wonder what Hell 98 would be?

03-06-2003, 02:19 PM	#3 (permalink)
BostonIceFire Guest Posts: n/a	or Hell 2000?

03-09-2003, 04:23 PM	#4 (permalink)
cloud Stoner God Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 746	Or even Hell XP

03-09-2003, 05:31 PM	#5 (permalink)
illustrator Love in Jesus Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Benbrook Posts: 4,594	And Hell Longhorn!

03-11-2003, 12:16 PM	#6 (permalink)
whodatshroom ~Shroomy~ Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 750	lol shit

03-13-2003, 03:06 PM	#10 (permalink)
zkataqurlxx Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Rhode island Posts: 12	ha funni

04-11-2003, 09:34 AM	#14 (permalink)
LeviathanC Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 1,312	He got

04-11-2003, 10:23 AM	#15 (permalink)
t e d d y k 1 t t y s GUY Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: new york :-Þ Posts: 931	poo bill gates

04-11-2003, 10:29 AM	#16 (permalink)
TygersaidStfu Shut the Fuck Up!! Ok!! Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: like i am going to tell u?? get real!!! roll eyes Posts: 479	wned: but

04-11-2003, 10:31 AM	#17 (permalink)
TygersaidStfu Shut the Fuck Up!! Ok!! Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: like i am going to tell u?? get real!!! roll eyes Posts: 479

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