rockdrummer

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules* from the male side.

These are our rules:
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don't try to*change that

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining*about you leaving it down.

1. Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the*tides. Let it be

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it*that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:

• Subtle hints do not work!
• Strong hints do not work!
• Obvious hints do not work!

JUST SAY IT!

1. ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine,*Really

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as: Sex,Sports, or Cars

1. You have enough clothes

1. You have too many shoes

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.


Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them an education

Deafness

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stefan2832

I can relate to that so much! But, of course I am a guy!
Oh the 'couch'...what would us guys do without it!


.

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rockdrummer

I know. Even though it's suppose to be a joke so much of it is exactly true!!

Ladies... PLEASE put the seat back up when you are finished.

stefan2832

yea!...even the last one about the couch is like camping.....ITS TRUE!!

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If it's not broke...don't fix it!

rockdrummer

yeah it is. Just don't light a campfire in the middle of your living room!!

JamieLynn

I think I got this by email already once or something... no matter what it's all true I just laugh at it and have no problem with it! There's a famous german comedian that I love so much who would use those enumerations above for his stand-up comedy

sallylou

I'm a woman in a household of men (hubby and 2 sons) so I can relate to this email. I love 'em but sometimes I need a break among the estrogen-endowed crowd.

Lately, the guys have been wanting to put up camping chairs in the living room because they're "more comfortable." I'm winning that battle so far. Camping chairs are for camping. And we're going camping later this month.

rockin'robin

HAHA! I can relate to that too....being the only female in my house with 3 boys.
Almost died yesterday....my 15 yr. old left his "smelly" football gear and clothes in the middle of his BR floor. Thank god for Febreeze!....

shel90

Hell NO!

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Shel~

"A child educated only at school is an uneducated child." -George Santayana

Jiro

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Frisky Feline

well men can't live without women, though.

MoonDrifter

correction:

"Women....

can't live with em, and without em."


I'm pretty sure that I'll be the next guy to sleep on the couch tonight.

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rockdrummer

That is a brilliant idea. I am off to get some camping chairs. Tell the men thanks for a great idea.

shel90

I better not share that idea with my hubby cuz he would do it.

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Shel~

"A child educated only at school is an uneducated child." -George Santayana

sallylou

LOL! I'm holding out and there are still no camp chairs in the living room. I understand the attraction. It's only so big and we have two couches, a chair and a huge circular ottoman in there. That's plenty!

Jolie77

Haha - Men and Women's rules just means that they're full of rubbish because it's full of flaws and it's got to have some good rebuttals coming up one way or another!

Either way, We all would have to swallow it up and get on with the program.

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“Tough girls come from New York. Sweet girls, they're from Georgia. But us Kentucky girls, we have fire and ice in our blood. We can ride horses, be a debutante, throw left hooks, and drink with the boys, all the while making sweet tea, darlin'. And if we have an opinion, you know you're gonna hear it.” - Ashley Judd

rockdrummer

What do ya got? Bring it sista! The womans rules would be opposite of the mens eh? Like, leave the seat down and, I shouldn't have to tell you what I want, you should just know and other silly nonsense like that.