Leftovers....

rockin'robin

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"Sir, could you please step out of the vehicle?"
"I'm too drunk, Officer. You get in."

If I have to work for an idiot, I might as well work for myself.

A criminal's best asset is his lie ability.

I have no idea why I walked in to the Short-Term Memory Clinic.

Age has its advantages.
Too bad I can't remember what they are.

Meets girl at bar. Takes her to Ikea. Quickly learns the difference between one-night stand and one nightstand.

-911 Whats the emergency?
My wife is suffocating me
-Literally or figuratively sir?
Well thats a stupid question. How would I be talking?
 
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