DocRicky

Hi! I am a gay man, just started dating a deaf man, and Id really like to learn ASL with a gay tutor, I live in Sacramento in northern California, and would greatly appreciate any help in finding out how to do this! Thanks! ;-)

Deafness

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caz12

out of curiosity why do it matter that he got to be gay,just an observations but what do you think a gay signer can do that hetro can't

Scarlet

Dude we're not very interested in why you wanna learn.. So You don't have to announce that!

Lau2046

If you're in a relationship, why do you want the tutor to be a gay man too? A little something on the side or just ignorance on your part? If you're looking to learn sign, just look for a good teacher, whomever they are - rather than focus on their sexual preference - that alone doesn't make a "good" tutor.

For sign instruction I'd try Craigslist to start or look at any local colleges that offer it in their adult education program. If you're near any deaf schools (I don't know anything about California) they also might have adult education in the evening. I can't imagine in a place as big as Sacramento that you'd have trouble finding a good tutor as long as you don't place limitations on them. Good luck in your search.

WillKnit

I totally understand wanting someone who is gay or at least very familiar with gay culture to teach sign. There is a lot of language and terminology around sexuality in English that is very nuanced and easy to misinterpret or use wrong and accidentally be offensive. Someone who is gay or familiar with gay culture would have the most current working knowledge of that. I think it is a fair assumption that it would be the same in ASL. it's also nice to have someone who you can ask about, for example, how to sign "blow job" or indicate who is a bottom, who is a top and who is switch/both without them becoming uncomfortable, or just not knowing.

caz12

and hetrosexual cant sign blow job then

Reba

I hate to burst your bubble but even an old straight lady interpreter like me knows those signs. I'm sure a straight ASL teacher would know them also. I don't know of any ASL curriculum that starts off with sex signs. That's not the way language is taught.

Language instructors and interpreters have to know lots of vocabulary of all kinds that they themselves might never use in their daily lives.

As a straight person, when I was learning ASL, I never requested straight only instructors. In fact, I had a mix of instructors, gay and straight, male and female, hearing and deaf. How would it have been if I said that I wanted straight teachers only? Would that be a biased request?

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Reba

The best way to learn ASL is in a classroom with several students. The best instructors are native Deaf or CODAs. The best curriculum to use is one that is ASL and interactive (not just learning lists of vocabulary).

I would say that things such as instructor's sexual preference, color, religion, age, weight, etc., are the least important factors when learning ASL. In an urban area like Sacramento, you should have no problem finding classes.

caz12

i myself be worried if at class first thing you and teacher be signing how do blow job..why dont you and deaf partner do that side yourselves..anyhow certain things dont need signing class for and that one

Reba

Absolutely! If he and his partner can't indicate who does what, or who wants what without the ASL sign, then they have more problems than a tutor can resolve.

david40price

Hi Rick, welcome to All Deaf. I applaud you for wanting to learn ASL to better communicate with your boyfriend.

I too am gay and hearing like yourself and started dating a wonderful Deaf man back in January. I started taking ASL classes in March and have since tried to get more involved with the Deaf community. Immersion seems to be a key to learning, like trying to learn any language other than your own.

I have also recently found a very great site, mentioned to me by others called lifeprint.com. I can’t tell you enough what a great site this is. Classes are great and so is this site. You have to take a multi-pronged approach to learning the language and try to get involved with local Deaf clubs or events if they have any. I’m sure with a city your size they must.

I went to the Deaf Club in Pittsburgh this week for my first time and I can already see I will be able to benefit from regularly attending.

As for wanting a gay teacher, I don’t see any need for this. There is nothing my boyfriend has taught me that I would have not gotten from any teacher, and your boyfriend is always going to teach you signs you won’t learn in class anyway due to different dialects. My boyfriend is from down South and already I have learned signs from him that are not native to this region and vice versa.

I also must say I am a bit surprised by how rude some of the people on this post have been to you. You are here to learn and are asking for help and shame on them for their comments, especially since you are reaching out to learn and asking for help. While some people are not interested in why you want to learn, that is fine, but many of us are and it is good to know your decision for learning ASL. If they don’t want to know, then they should just ignore your reason and move on, not post a nasty comment back to you.

I hope your path is a pleasant journey and wish you the best of luck. We are on the same journey, I just happened to start 6 months ago. J

-David

Scarlet

Hahaha I'll be surprised if they didn't xP

ambrosia

Oh I really like this thread. I laughed....a lot.....and hard.

Yeah I have no idea what the "official" sign for blow job is...but I think that's a word that lends itself to an easy visual interpretation that is fairly self explanatory

Frisky Feline

give the OP a break. david 40p is very kind to give good tips.

so welcome. ")