For new hearing parents... A positive story.

Cloggy · 05-31-2006, 05:32 PM

For those new, and looking for information...
I am the father of three children. The youngest (now almost 4 years old) was born deaf and got has bi-lateral CI in november 2004.
There is no deafness in my family, so deafness was unfamiliar territory for me and the rest of the family (and friends)

The following article is long. When I found it on the web, I had to sit down, and read it.

But it's a beautiful story with excellent angles.

Often hearing parents are told that they "just jump at the opportunity to fix the ears" wheras from my experience and from this article - I know it normally is not like that.

Anyway, follow the link and enjoy the read.

Quote:

From the article...
http://www.michaelharvey-phd.com/pag...%20implant.htmThis article describes some psychological and ethical considerations when providing family therapy for parents who are considering cochlear implantation for their deaf/hard-of-hearing child. Common couples' dynamics, multi-level criteria of informed consent, therapist bias and intervention strategies are illustrated. The clinical vignette of 8-year old Tommy and his family is largely factual with enough changes to disguise the participants' identities. I took more creative liberties narrating my daydream in order to best illustrate the relevant impacts of the pathological and culturally affirmative models.

Fragmenter · 05-31-2006, 05:42 PM

I read this article and it applies to everyone here in one fell swoop. It won't give you a "yes or no" answer about cochlear implants in children. But it will make you think... and that is always a wonderful thing!

Decisions for your children are not easy and implanting children is not the easy way out for the parents. This article should prove that parents are sensitive to the deaf community and they don't swallow doctors' advice hook, sinker and line (<--- that is an idiom).

Fragmenter · 05-31-2006, 05:44 PM

By the way, this thread should be stickied!

R2D2 · 05-31-2006, 06:15 PM

Yes...the articles shows that many parents do weigh up all the issues and don't get a CI just at the drop of a hat. It is an honest and frank consideration of all the issues...I agree with Frag it would be nice to see this stickied.

neecy · 05-31-2006, 07:34 PM

Great articles!!! I agree too it should be stickied - it goes to show that parents don't just automatically go to "fix broken ears" without lots of investigation, and education beforehand!

sr171soars · 05-31-2006, 10:04 PM

Nice read and long though and I had no idea it could so complicated. My decision for myself (including my family) was quite simple in comparison.

Roadrunner · 06-01-2006, 03:12 AM

Mod Note:

Thread's 'sticky' for the time being--

~RR

Fragmenter · 06-01-2006, 07:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sr171soars

Nice read and long though and I had no idea it could so complicated.

Welcome to my world

sr171soars · 06-01-2006, 07:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fragmenter

Welcome to my world

I can only imagine it would be...very complicated.

Believe it or not, one of the main reasons (not the only one of course) I did it was my wife saying to me "You gotta do this for your family and yourself...it will be one the best things you ever done in your life". Now {dryly}, if that doesn't simplify things...

Fragmenter · 06-01-2006, 07:38 AM

Ha!

loml · 06-01-2006, 06:03 PM

The article certainly covers the bases.

I struggle with the entire "ASL natural language" business, it is "natural" for humans to voice. The "deaf culture stuff": children belong with their family culture. When you raise a child, you work towards making them independant and able to make their way out in the world. To raise a child dependant on others for "interpretation", simply doesn't cut it for me.

The arguement that the CI complanies are only doing this to make money....oh please.... anyone ever thought just How Much Money the ASL Powers make. *sheesh*

People like Ben Bahan, Matthew Moore, Harlan Lane etc. do you think they wish their families could read and write at only a grade four level? I think not!

hmmmmmm I am still thinking....

greema · 06-01-2006, 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fragmenter

By the way, this thread should be stickied!

curious -- what's stickied? trying to pick up the lingo...

neecy · 06-01-2006, 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by greema

curious -- what's stickied? trying to pick up the lingo...

means it stays(sticks) at the top of the forum list - if you look at the list of topics http://www.alldeaf.com/hearing-aids-cochlear-implants/ you will see "sticky" then the name of this thread. It simply keeps it from getting lost as newer posts are made.

greema · 06-01-2006, 06:26 PM

cloggy, thanks for posting the link (i started reading it at work today and still am on the 3rd page and it sounds very interesting so far) and fragmenter, thanks for bringing it to my attention

Cloggy · 06-01-2006, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by greema

cloggy, thanks for posting the link (i started reading it at work today and still am on the 3rd page and it sounds very interesting so far) and fragmenter, thanks for bringing it to my attention

It is a long read and I'm glad you are enjoying it...

Roadrunner · 06-01-2006, 07:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by neecy

means it stays(sticks) at the top of the forum list - if you look at the list of topics http://www.alldeaf.com/forumdisplay.php?f=8 you will see "sticky" then the name of this thread. It simply keeps it from getting lost as newer posts are made.

You couldn't have posted it any better--

Thank you kindly for giving such an explanation....

~RR

Cloggy · 06-01-2006, 07:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Roadrunner

You couldn't have posted it any better--

Thank you kindly for giving such an explanation....

~RR

Roadrunner,

Thanks for putting the "stickie" on. Great feature!

Freaky Cat · 06-01-2006, 07:37 PM

long reading .. but good explantions..and yes very clear.. thanks for the link.

hope you didnt mind but i did got the link and passed along to my friends so they can read this.

Cloggy · 06-01-2006, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmileyGin

long reading .. but good explantions..and yes very clear.. thanks for the link.

hope you didnt mind but i did got the link and passed along to my friends so they can read this.

That's why I posted it here and that's why the moderator thought it was important enough to keep it on top.

I'm glad you enjoy reading it... It is long, and we don't have to agree with all but I thought it would be very interesting to everyone.

But I just pointed to a webside, so please... spread the word... sorry WWW.

Boult · 06-01-2006, 08:14 PM

Also available in PDF format for free;
From: Journal of Deaf Studies and Deaf Education 6:1 2001
http://jdsde.oxfordjournals.org/cgi/...bstract/6/1/70

Michael Harvey PhD website: http://www.michaelharvey-phd.com/

Cloggy · 06-01-2006, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boult

Also available in PDF format for free;
From: Journal of Deaf Studies and Deaf Education 6:1 2001
http://jdsde.oxfordjournals.org/cgi/...bstract/6/1/70

Michael Harvey PhD website: http://www.michaelharvey-phd.com/

Thanks Boult.
By the way, there's some more articles on his website.

greema · 06-01-2006, 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by neecy

means it stays(sticks) at the top of the forum list - if you look at the list of topics http://www.alldeaf.com/forumdisplay.php?f=8 you will see "sticky" then the name of this thread. It simply keeps it from getting lost as newer posts are made.

ah! thank you, neecy!

now i can understand why -- this is such a good topic not to get lost!

greema · 06-01-2006, 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cloggy

It is a long read and I'm glad you are enjoying it...

haven't yet resumed reading it due to having a housefull of children and grandchildren that should have moved out! LOL (but i love them anyway!)

neecy · 06-01-2006, 10:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Roadrunner

You couldn't have posted it any better--

Thank you kindly for giving such an explanation....

~RR

my pleasure!

Cloggy · 06-01-2006, 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by greema

haven't yet resumed reading it due to having a housefull of children and grandchildren that should have moved out! LOL (but i love them anyway!)

You haven't kicked Fragmenter out yet???

He must have too good a life with you... Don't spoil him... kick him OUT!

greema · 06-02-2006, 07:10 AM

ha ha, not fragmenter LOL -- he lives hundreds miles away and i am SO thankful for a VP (videophone) -- we get to chat a few times a week and we can "see" our grandchildren -- the same with our youngest who lives further away -- i try to "see" her everyday
i have 4 children and the 2nd one moved back in with us with her 2 kids

gnulinuxman · 06-02-2006, 05:58 PM

Are you happy because your daughter functions like a hearing person?

This article explains people who don't want a deaf child and use blasphemy to convince then that it's OK.

Leo is the smarter of the two parents. He seems to have more of a grasp on the cultural situation. Shirley views her son as a pair of broken ears.

Cloggy · 06-02-2006, 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gnulinuxman

Are you happy because your daughter functions like a hearing person?

This article explains people who don't want a deaf child and use blasphemy to convince then that it's OK.

Leo is the smarter of the two parents. He seems to have more of a grasp on the cultural situation. Shirley views her son as a pair of broken ears.

You know, You're very welcome to post here. Any views are welcome.
But this kind of use of language is really not appreciated.

If you cannot use normal language, just don't use any at all.

From your remark it shows that you have not reat the article, and that you are just posting to have your voice heared.

If I'm wrong, just show that with a post that actually is constructive and ask the moderator to remove your previous one.
So there's your challenge: Read the -complete- article and write a constructive post. Positive or negative... as long as it is constructive!

Fragmenter · 06-02-2006, 06:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gnulinuxman

This article explains people who don't want a deaf child and use blasphemy to convince then that it's OK.

Leo is the smarter of the two parents. He seems to have more of a grasp on the cultural situation. Shirley views her son as a pair of broken ears.

Then you read the article with a biased opinion. Leo wasn't any smarter than his wife nor was the shrink the smartest one of all.

The article, to me, says that the parents have the right to make their own decision independent of outside influence.

06-02-2006, 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cloggy

You know, You're very welcome to post here. Any views are welcome.
But this kind of use of language is really not appreciated.

If you cannot use normal language, just don't use any at all.

From your remark it shows that you have not reat the article, and that you are just posting to have your voice heared.

If I'm wrong, just show that with a post that actually is constructive and ask the moderator to remove your previous one.
So there's your challenge: Read the -complete- article and write a constructive post. Positive or negative... as long as it is constructive!

I'm shocked that got a slap on the wrist. I see PLENTY worse on here all the time. I dont understand what isn't "normal language" in that post.

05-31-2006, 05:42 PM	#2 (permalink)
Fragmenter Registered User Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 823	I read this article and it applies to everyone here in one fell swoop. It won't give you a "yes or no" answer about cochlear implants in children. But it will make you think... and that is always a wonderful thing! Decisions for your children are not easy and implanting children is not the easy way out for the parents. This article should prove that parents are sensitive to the deaf community and they don't swallow doctors' advice hook, sinker and line (<--- that is an idiom). __________________ Please don't feed the Trolls. They are for your viewing entertainment only. Thank you.

05-31-2006, 05:44 PM	#3 (permalink)
Fragmenter Registered User Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 823	By the way, this thread should be stickied! __________________ Please don't feed the Trolls. They are for your viewing entertainment only. Thank you.

05-31-2006, 06:15 PM	#4 (permalink)
R2D2 Registered User Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Australia Posts: 2,605	Yes...the articles shows that many parents do weigh up all the issues and don't get a CI just at the drop of a hat. It is an honest and frank consideration of all the issues...I agree with Frag it would be nice to see this stickied. __________________ Left ear implanted 9th June 2006 Activated 29th June 2006 Right ear implanted 31st August 2007 Activated 18th September Both Nucleus Freedom Cochlear implant myths

05-31-2006, 07:34 PM	#5 (permalink)
neecy Registered User Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Beautiful British Columbia Posts: 1,409	Great articles!!! I agree too it should be stickied - it goes to show that parents don't just automatically go to "fix broken ears" without lots of investigation, and education beforehand! __________________ Friends are angels that lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

06-01-2006, 03:12 AM	#7 (permalink)
Roadrunner Registered User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: NY Posts: 7,089	Mod Note: Thread's 'sticky' for the time being-- ~RR __________________ "Nothing is ever lost by courtesy. It is the cheapest of pleasures, costs nothing, and conveys much." - Erastus Wiman

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05-31-2006, 10:04 PM	#6 (permalink)
sr171soars Registered User Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 2,700	Nice read and long though and I had no idea it could so complicated. My decision for myself (including my family) was quite simple in comparison.

06-01-2006, 07:38 AM	#10 (permalink)
Fragmenter Registered User Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 823	Ha! __________________ Please don't feed the Trolls. They are for your viewing entertainment only. Thank you.

06-01-2006, 06:26 PM	#14 (permalink)
greema Registered User Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 605	cloggy, thanks for posting the link (i started reading it at work today and still am on the 3rd page and it sounds very interesting so far) and fragmenter, thanks for bringing it to my attention

06-01-2006, 07:37 PM	#18 (permalink)
Freaky Cat Registered User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Central ArKaNsAs Posts: 10,221	long reading .. but good explantions..and yes very clear.. thanks for the link. hope you didnt mind but i did got the link and passed along to my friends so they can read this. __________________ When you miss me just look up to the night sky and remember, I'm like a star; sometimes you can't see me, but I'm always there! Freaky Cat's Blog

06-02-2006, 07:10 AM	#26 (permalink)
greema Registered User Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 605	ha ha, not fragmenter LOL -- he lives hundreds miles away and i am SO thankful for a VP (videophone) -- we get to chat a few times a week and we can "see" our grandchildren -- the same with our youngest who lives further away -- i try to "see" her everyday i have 4 children and the 2nd one moved back in with us with her 2 kids

06-02-2006, 05:58 PM	#27 (permalink)
gnulinuxman Registered User Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Wisconsin, USA Posts: 1,740	Are you happy because your daughter functions like a hearing person? This article explains people who don't want a deaf child and use blasphemy to convince then that it's OK. Leo is the smarter of the two parents. He seems to have more of a grasp on the cultural situation. Shirley views her son as a pair of broken ears.

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