rolling7

No, I'm not wrong about jillo.

Lets you and me be buddies tonight and go to a bar and throw back a few. There will be plenty of hot women there, for sure. After awhile I'll say to you: "Go ahead and get you a piece. You'll probably have to pay the girl but make sure you use a condom."

Yes, I AM encouraging you to commit an illegal act.....and hurry up and do it soon.
I'm man enough to stand up and say it....I'm encouraging you to commit an illegal act in this situation.

Deafness

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StSapphire

The fact that you have a lack of reading comprehension doesn't make you right.

As for your suggestion:

1) I can think of plenty other people (even from here!) who I'd much rather go to a bar with than you, so I think I'll pass.
2) Pretending like I got into a situation that far, somehow, I'd ignore you, or possibly punch you in the face for implying that I should (or even would) cheat on my girlfriend. Who, realistically, would probably be in the same bar. Actually, more realistically, she would be the one to punch you. But it's all the same to me.
3) Pretending that I wasn't in fact involved in a long term committed relationship, and also pretending that I was, in fact, so distinctly hideous that the absolutely only method of my getting laid was by picking up a prostitute, and that wherever we were at, prostitution was illegal, your fake situation would still not be even close to equivalent to what happened here. The situation you created specifically and clearly intended to imply a feeling of immediacy (ie "I actually mean within minutes, when I say soon" as opposed to "I mean within the next week, when I say soon" that my boss would imply when referring to a project that I've just started at work, or "I mean within a month or two, when I say soon" when my girlfriend talks about moving). Anyone with any amount of reading comprehension (including the ability to read a clarification on the part of the original poster, when there's ambiguity) is able to understand that a remark of that sort, made on the internet, implies no immediacy. Your desire to interpret it that way either demonstrates that you're a liar, or your complete lack of reading comprehension. Or, as the case may be, both.

rolling7

It only serves to demonstrate that jillo was encourageing me to comit an illegal act and jillo will never admit to this, unlike the above situation where I would because I know it is illegal to make the sugestion. The fact that you need to go into #1-2-3, just shows deflection which means your are "echo" jillo.

AlleyCat

This shit, again? And here, at 40 years old, I thought I was old enough to wise up and understand. Guess not.

StSapphire

No, you're wrong, and I'm pretty sure you have an (undiagnosed?) reading comprehension disorder. You should really get that checked out.

Obviously, there was no deflection (hell, you didn't even ask a question to me to deflect!), and I can't "echo" someone who I responded before. Get your head out of your ass and read responses, or else stfu and go away. (Note: Not censorship. Yes, rudeness.)

I'm honestly not certain which of us you're showing disdain for (if not both),

Oh well, I figured the thread wasn't going anywhere, so why not feed the troll some more?

AlleyCat

My reply was not under your post. For a reason.

StSapphire

Fair enough. I can usually tell when I'm being childish and silly, but I'm not always sure who's annoyed by it.

Beowulf

We're not bothered by the little things.

StSapphire

Lucky me.

Foxrac

You underestimates the GLBT people.

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Mizzou

Question for homosexuals. I rare use that word "Homo" and I always joke about homo milk.

Any of human who in deep love and who they are. That is not choice, love is love mean everything that show to partner/ Significant Other.

Lot of people felt "gay" at born but getting older, you judge who you are straight or gay. I never look at myself till get older that when I realized who I am. That is no matter straight or gay. Not choice. That is true LOVE.

ibazly

I'm very confused about what has happened to this forum.

But, here's what I KNOW:

You do not CHOOSE your sexuality. You can't just say "I have decided to be gay" or "I have decided to be bi" or "I have decided to be straight". If you really believe it is a CHOICE, then why don't you just choose to be something else? Why not choose to be gay? Do you really think you could do it?

Of course, whether or not you ACT on the feelings you have IS your choice. Often religious people make the mistake of thinking that their religion states that homosexuality is a sin. The truth is, these religions state that having sex with someone of the same gender is wrong, and some openly gay people live happily as Catholics or Mormons or Muslims... they just choose abstanenance.

As far as people "changing" is concerned: sexuality can also be fluid. Love is an emotion that can transcend gender, and so someone who has felt that they are gay might find themselves attracted to someone of the opposite sex, or someone who is straight may find themselves attracted to someone of the same sex. Asexuality, bisexuality, transgender: you cannot simplify these things and you cannot say that someone was "turned" or "change their mind". When people "change" later in life, often it is based on a discovery of feeling they had supressed in their youth, orsometimes it's just a matter of them finding someone who doesn't fit what they would normally be attracted to.

NO ONE just wakes up and says "I'm going to be gay now". They likely already had the feelings they are no expressing.

The only choice someone has is what to DO about their feelings. Feelings are, in fact, quite irrational, and you do not hae control. To any straight person who has ever claimed that a gay person "chose" to be gay, then I ask them, simply: did you CHOOSE to be straight? Did you CHOOSE to fall in love with a specific partner?

Also, consider THIS. Sexuality is not only fluid, but very often it is not based in extremes. It is very rare to find someone who is 100% straight or 100% gay or 100% bi (50/50) or 100% asexual (0%). In order to truly be 100% gay, for example, it would mean that you are UNABLE to even RECOGNIZE or have an OPINION on what makes a female attractive. I am gay, but I do find certain women more attractive then others. This indicates some sort of preference. the same goes for soeone who is straight: for a man to be 100% straight, he would have to be incapable of finding any part of a man attractive. But the truth is, most straight men can still say that they think "Guy A" is better looking than "Guy B". It doesn't mean they are attracted TO that guy, but it does indicate a PREFERENCE in APPEARANCE. Obviously this can be broken, and I'm sure there are many people who perhaps are 100% a certain way.

Ultimately, my point is, none of these issues are black and white. Every human experience is different, and no one can set the "standard" for how a life should go! Just be kind to each other - it's not that hard. Someone else's life is not your business, and has no effect on you at all. So let people do what they want, and respect their choices!

<3 Make love, not war. <3

midnight storm

I agree with ibazly.

As a gay man myself, I have encountered this question multiple times, and have spent countless nights dwelling on this subject.

If sexuality was just a choice, we as humans would tend to make the easiest choice. The choice that would mean a lifetime without ridicule, teasing, countless encounters with 'homophobes', and just in general a lot less stress.

I sit up at night sometimes thinking, "I wonder how different my life would be had I been straight. Would I be as confused about love as I am? Would life choices be easier? Would I be teased as much?"

If you think about it, why would anyone want to choose to be something that a lot of other people hate? It doesn't make sense.

I was reading in earlier replies that some people have a friend who was born gay, and then another friend had made the choice to be gay after he had "shitty lick with women".. if I quoted that right.. Obviously the guy who had "made the choice" to be gay, was born gay, was fighting with it all of his life(thus the reason for the shitty luck with women), and finally came out of the closet and REALIZED, not chose, that he was gay. And guess what? He was a happier man.

It's never choosing to be gay or straight. It's realizing that you are one or the other, and choosing how to act upon that realization.

Clairol

I have not read all the answers on the post (yet) so I might say something that was already said. But you can never say it too much...

First, why did nobody ask : are heterosexual born that way or is it a choice?

Second, social sciences are have shown that it is NOT either biological condition = not chosen and environmental condition = chosen.

For exemple, it is possible that you do not choose your sexual orientation (whether hetero, homo or bi) and that is learned. You do not always choose what you learn and actually most of learned things are not learned consciously. So that implies most things we learn from the environnement are not a choice, from our music tastes to our deep beliefs.

It is possible than sexual orientation is one of them, but the research on this is unconclusive. Science cannot say anything about the origin of sexual orientation, whether hetero, homo or bi.

Unfortunaly, science is as biaised as our society in thinking that researching the cause of heterosexuality is unecessary as it is "more natural" than homosexuality. As if sexuality's sole purpose was reproduction...

Clairol

Exactly! "Homosexual lifestyle" is an idiom used by many to justify their fear and/or digust of the Other by attaching them to habits that are considered morally bad such as alcohol or drug abuse, child abuse, etc. But there is no link between homosexuality and any "lifestyle" habit.

CSign

I really don't like the term "homosexual". It reeks of negativity.

Clairol

Why?

CSign

that's why. Most often the term "homosexual" is used in a negative light, and has a negative connotation. You don't often hear people use the term
"homosexual" in a positive light. It seems to be most often used as a clinical term or a smear.

CSign

Also, it's incredibly rare to meet a person who identifies themselves as "homosexual". I've never met anyone who identified that way. I'm sure someone in this universe might, but most would identify themselves as Gay/Lesbian/Queer/Bi/ etc. Not, "homosexual".

deafdyke

That's another reason why I hate the term hearing impaired. It sounds clinical.

Clairol

Ok I understand what you both mean. "Homosexual" indeed sounds clinical and is not really a term you identify with. I never use that word myself, I identify as lesbian. We could say the same about "heterosexual", most people use straight.

Same goes for hearing impaired indeed, good comparison!

CSign

I should probably clarify that I am straight, but I have a vested interest in gay rights and equality.

jillio

I rarely use the word, and none of my gay / lesbian friends use it for self identification purposes. However, they have been known to use it in discussions of clinical or sociological implications. I don't see it as a negative, nor do they. I would liken it more to use of the term deaf than "hearing impaired". Now if someone was using the term "sexual orientation impaired" then there would be a problem. There are many derogatory terms out there in regard to homosexuality. Let's work on getting rid of those.

And, let's also keep context in mind, and who is using the terminology. Intent is important here. My best friend happens to be a gay guy. I call him a "mo" all the time. Coming from me, it is not an insult, and we both know my intent is not to degrade. Coming from a homophobic, it would have a completely different connotation. Nor would I ever use such a reference with someone I did not have a deep and abiding friendship with.

Daredevel7

^^ You're such a mo.

Beowulf

Better than being Larry or Curly I guess.

jillio

deafskeptic

Guess being gay is better than being a stooge.

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jillio

Hey,there!

Berry

How do we know the stooges weren't gay?

They all slept in the same bed.

This thread is HILARIOUS!

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jillio

You have an excellent point. Maybe Moe wasn't the only 'mo.