Deaf Boyfriend versus Hearing Boyfriend... - Page 2

rickoshay13 · 02-26-2009, 12:06 AM

okay, this is my first post on this site.... I am hearing and an ASL student, and gay.

To be honest I dont think it matters if the person you want a relationship with is hearing or not, if the guy that you make sparks with is dedicated and loving enough then you will work something out, whether he learns sign, or if you can use your voice or whatever the case may be- And Id say if its mixed, hearing a deaf or HOH then Id say you're getting the best of both worlds

To be honest I wish I could sign much more fluently! (I suppose this is why I am taking the classes!) Id love to meet a cute boy to practice signing with

Byrdie714 · 02-26-2009, 09:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rickoshay13

okay, this is my first post on this site.... I am hearing and an ASL student, and gay.

To be honest I dont think it matters if the person you want a relationship with is hearing or not, if the guy that you make sparks with is dedicated and loving enough then you will work something out, whether he learns sign, or if you can use your voice or whatever the case may be- And Id say if its mixed, hearing a deaf or HOH then Id say you're getting the best of both worlds

To be honest I wish I could sign much more fluently! (I suppose this is why I am taking the classes!) Id love to meet a cute boy to practice signing with

You will!

SnAzZyStyLe2002 · 02-27-2009, 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rickoshay13

okay, this is my first post on this site.... I am hearing and an ASL student, and gay.

To be honest I dont think it matters if the person you want a relationship with is hearing or not, if the guy that you make sparks with is dedicated and loving enough then you will work something out, whether he learns sign, or if you can use your voice or whatever the case may be- And Id say if its mixed, hearing a deaf or HOH then Id say you're getting the best of both worlds

To be honest I wish I could sign much more fluently! (I suppose this is why I am taking the classes!) Id love to meet a cute boy to practice signing with

You could be looking at *him* right now .....

verasch · 03-01-2009, 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OrangeOreo

So, which is better to date? Hearing or Deaf?

what's the difference? men don't listen anyway.

blairtheblur · 03-02-2009, 10:19 PM

Hmm. I'm a hearing ASL student and I think ASL is such a beautiful language that I instantly think a guy is cuter if he's deaf. I know, it's strange. :/

~*Kaelei*~ · 03-04-2009, 11:17 PM

I have dated both, hearing and Deaf....

but personally I prefer hearing boyfriend over deaf boyfriend. The experiences I had with deaf boyfriend was not all that great....too much drama. But the experiences I had with hearing boyfriends are great...I felt so connected to them and it's just easier for me to connect with them.

My Hubby is hearing...and he knows some signs...and I'm grateful that he's learning my deaf culture...it's shows me how much he cares and how much he wants to be part of my life.

I think it depends on a person...it depends on the personality and everything.

~*Kaelei*~ · 03-04-2009, 11:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by verasch

what's the difference? men don't listen anyway.

True... about 95% of the time that men don't listen.

ssumma · 03-05-2009, 12:46 PM

If you have a softphone for VP, we can practice..

Quote:

Originally Posted by rickoshay13

okay, this is my first post on this site.... I am hearing and an ASL student, and gay.

To be honest I dont think it matters if the person you want a relationship with is hearing or not, if the guy that you make sparks with is dedicated and loving enough then you will work something out, whether he learns sign, or if you can use your voice or whatever the case may be- And Id say if its mixed, hearing a deaf or HOH then Id say you're getting the best of both worlds

To be honest I wish I could sign much more fluently! (I suppose this is why I am taking the classes!) Id love to meet a cute boy to practice signing with

I Shed Misery · 03-16-2009, 10:14 PM

I have only dated Hearing guys only (not really dated and I was with this one hearing guy, no wait two but he was a clingy byotch lol) The second one loved to date deaf guys lmao. WEIRD-O!

I'm sorry I don't feel so comfortable dating a guy who is deaf or hard of hearing. I'm HOH. I dunno I feel much more comfortable with a guy who is hearing. Not because he has the ears but I don't know haha. I grew up as a hearing person so I'm used to them. Well, if he was HOOOOOOOOOOOT! HELL YEAH! I would!! Seriously, I do everything a hearing person does. I love music, I love to hear... EVERYTHING! I just want someone to do the same things I can do.

Tousi · 03-16-2009, 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I Shed Misery

I have only dated Hearing guys only (not really dated and I was with this one hearing guy, no wait two but he was a clingy byotch lol) The second one loved to date deaf guys lmao. WEIRD-O!

I'm sorry I don't feel so comfortable dating a guy who is deaf or hard of hearing. I'm HOH. I dunno I feel much more comfortable with a guy who is hearing. Not because he has the ears but I don't know haha. I grew up as a hearing person so I'm used to them. Well, if he was HOOOOOOOOOOOT! HELL YEAH! I would!! Seriously, I do everything a hearing person does. I love music, I love to hear... EVERYTHING!

**Bottesini** · 03-16-2009, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tousi

What may I help you with Tousi. Translation= That poster is hearing and prefers hearing.. An accident they came to the deaf website.

Any other questions just let me know.

Tousi · 03-16-2009, 10:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bottesini

What may I help you with Tousi. Translation= That poster is hearing and prefers hearing.. An accident they came to the deaf website.

Any other questions just let me know.

An accident? I see his username all over this board now...

P.S. Just now noticed he says he's HoH but still....

**Jiro** · 03-16-2009, 10:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tousi

An accident? I see his username all over this board now...

yea a newcomer

I Shed Misery · 03-16-2009, 10:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bottesini

What may I help you with Tousi. Translation= That poster is hearing and prefers hearing.. An accident they came to the deaf website.

Any other questions just let me know.

LMAO! Bahahahahaha! You're funny *hands you a cookie*

LOL! I am Heard-of-hearing. I am deaf in my left ear and my right ear is ok, not amazing but ok.
With a hearing aid it makes it all better.

Sorry for the confusion and be nice to the newbies

**Bottesini** · 03-16-2009, 10:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I Shed Misery

LMAO! Bahahahahaha! You're funny *hands you a cookie*

LOL! I am Heard-of-hearing. I am deaf in my left ear and my right ear is ok, not amazing but ok.
With a hearing aid it makes it all better.

Sorry for the confusion and be nice to the newbies

*smiles angelically* It is how I make friends.

**Jiro** · 03-16-2009, 10:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I Shed Misery

LMAO! Bahahahahaha! You're funny *hands you a cookie*

are you really really really sure you want to give bott a cookie like that? think twice if you want to keep your hand

Tousi · 03-16-2009, 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by I Shed Misery

LMAO! Bahahahahaha! You're funny *hands you a cookie*

LOL! I am Heard-of-hearing. I am deaf in my left ear and my right ear is ok, not amazing but ok.
With a hearing aid it makes it all better.

Sorry for the confusion and be nice to the newbies

What do you have against deaf or HoH folks, considering you, yourself are HoH?

**Bottesini** · 03-16-2009, 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jiro

are you really really really sure you want to give bott a cookie like that? think twice if you want to keep your hand

Shhhh!!!

Tousi · 03-16-2009, 10:54 PM

pathymo · 03-21-2009, 11:32 AM

I would love to date a deaf guy. Crazy that in NY I haven't met one yet :-( guess I don't know where to look. I'm hearing and have always dated hearing. But deaf guys turn me on ... :-)

GarnetTigerMom · 03-21-2009, 12:07 PM

It's dont' really matter which boyfriend is better hearing or deaf. So, really the only difference between deaf and hearing is the commuication and education levels. But if a guy got a good heart and personality,, go for it! But remind yourself if you date a guy make sure you check his background before you get too serious with a guy. A guy might have a bad track record for hurting women or criminial record. If he got a bad criminal record, DUMP HIM! he not worth all the risk! :-)

MitchIndy · 04-04-2009, 10:59 PM

I'm Deaf and Gay (obviously) from Indianapolis. I dated both hearing and Deaf guys. Speaking from experiences, I prefer Deaf guys because the communication were great and I didn't have to worry about hearing guys talking about me orally in front of me since they think I can't lip read very well. Also, some would try to take advantage of me due to the fact that I am Deaf and thinking I wouldn't stand up for myself.

The only con about dating Deaf guys is that nothing is private with them but if you really love and trust him, you should have nothing to hide.

If I ever meet a nice, sweet hearing man who treats me right who wants a serious relationship, that would be wonderful for me.

**Cheri** · 04-05-2009, 01:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SnAzZyStyLe2002

"In the deaf world, your personal life isn't private."

I would have to agree with you, I have found several deaf friends on facebook that I haven't see for more than twenty years, they told me a lot of stories about other deaf people that I used to know, like who's sleeping with whom, who's on drugs, and much more. I was like

is that how it is in the deaf community? Everyone knows your name, knows everything about your life and that's frighten

I've mostly had dated hearing guys than I do with deaf guys, it is just because I'm more involved in the hearing world than I am in the deaf world.

ASLGAL · 04-05-2009, 10:40 AM

It didn't say no hearing folks ideas in this thread so....

I would have to say that D/deaf vs Hearing would be down on the list of what I might want in a boyfriend.

I thought about the question and if my hubs(HOH) were no longer here and I had to think about dating again I would not discount any good person because they were D/deaf or Hearing. I would look at all their attributes.

lemontree · 04-05-2009, 05:56 PM

i think i would perfer to date someone deaf or hoh simply for the common experience and understanding of having crappy hearing.

in my experiences of dating and relationships all the hearing people i dated ended up dumping me or doing the "i'm just not into you" (like from that book/movie) saying it wasn't gonna work out between us coz of the communication problems and that they were tired of trying to understand me or be understood by me (too much writing on paper or repeating our words, i guess), and that it wasn't fun to have to stop watching the hockey/football/baseball game to explain what what was going on, or not doing things coz i wasn't able to hear the music or whatever.

so yeah, seems like i would get along better and not have communication problems with a deaf or hoh person, or could i be wrong?

also, pickings are pretty slim out there for me as i would want to be with someone who has the same education level as me (PhD) and here in Canada it is like winning the lottery, pretty rare, lol.

Endy · 04-09-2009, 08:30 PM

I am Deaf. That depends on individuals. One day I want to have a Deaf BF but I'd rather not due to everyday drama and all-time negativity.

I have a hearing lover, he is amazing - Drama-free and has great positive attitude all times. I so attract to him because of his positive attitude - That's what I am looking in the relationship --- Drama-free and Positive Attitude. He has terrible eye/hand coordination learning signs, so we created homemade signs that something is easy on his hands. We are very cool about it.

I'd love to run into some Deaf guy that has Drama-free and awesome Positive Attitude, it'd be more likely for me to attract to.

CrzyMeg · 04-09-2009, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OrangeOreo

I'm deaf and gay (obiviously!) and I had a deaf boyfriend and a hearing boyfriend before. But, I have been wondering lately about which world to have a relationship with - deaf guy or hearing guy? I always feel like it's hard for my hearing ex to understand where I came from (i.e. deaf culture, etc) but there was a great chemistry while I feel opposite with my deaf ex. He understand where I came from, but lack of 'fire' chemistry.

And, it's easier to keep the personal life private if I was w/ a hearing guy. W/ a deaf guy, the personal life isn't private. Y'all know how deaf community can be!

I have always wanted to date a CODA guy someday! 2 worlds in one :-p

So, which is better to date? Hearing or Deaf?

i been raise in hearing community. i did few time date deaf guys but no chemistry but i am currently dating hearing guy, he is great. Great chemsitry. Sometimes it depend where you coming from and raise.

lemontree · 04-09-2009, 10:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Endy

I am Deaf. That depends on individuals. One day I want to have a Deaf BF but I'd rather not due to everyday drama and all-time negativity.

I have a hearing lover, he is amazing - Drama-free and has great positive attitude all times. I so attract to him because of his positive attitude - That's what I am looking in the relationship --- Drama-free and Positive Attitude. He has terrible eye/hand coordination learning signs, so we created homemade signs that something is easy on his hands. We are very cool about it.

I'd love to run into some Deaf guy that has Drama-free and awesome Positive Attitude, it'd be more likely for me to attract to.

What do you mean by "drama-free"?

Endy · 04-10-2009, 12:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lemontree

What do you mean by "drama-free"?

The word, Drama has few meanings. One for Theater. One for a person who makes a scene. Notice that I use "scene" I mean the scene where we hang out or at home. I am not pointing to a person but I point to a person who makes a scene. That's the difference.

So, "Drama-free" is used to describe someone who doesn't cause problems and who doesn't have many personal problems in a scene. Drama-free" implies a respectful, peaceful, happiness, loving and harmonious scene. For these people who use good words and talk decently. It'd be easier to make a scene enjoyable and have a good time in a simple approach. Many many people LOVE this approach, more peacefully. Those people attract good vibes, positive attitudes and good souls. Even Good Karma!

"Drama" is used to describe someone who does not respect making a scene for no reason or someone obviously is not considerate mouthing bad things in front of people that you don't know which that is not called for. Or Anyone who brings personal problems, troubles, and (or) b*llsh*t to people every day. Those people attract bad vibes and negativity.

So, um..., who would you want to hang out in a crowd around that a drama queen (eye-rolling big mouth-motor with attitude, *snap*) in that scene, or would you hang out with peaceful high-spirited cute guys having a good time (smiling and chuckling) over there? If it's for me, I would walk over to the cute guys who know how to enjoy better.

Do you see the difference? That's what I mean is that I want a great guy WHO doesn't make a trouble or cause a trouble in a scene. I want a peaceful, cool, harmonious guy that can relax in a scene and enjoy the Life. That's what I so attract to the drama-free guys.

lemontree · 04-10-2009, 03:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Endy

The word, Drama has few meanings. One for Theater. One for a person who makes a scene. Notice that I use "scene" I mean the scene where we hang out or at home. I am not pointing to a person but I point to a person who makes a scene. That's the difference.

So, "Drama-free" is used to describe someone who doesn't cause problems and who doesn't have many personal problems in a scene. Drama-free" implies a respectful, peaceful, happiness, loving and harmonious scene. For these people who use good words and talk decently. It'd be easier to make a scene enjoyable and have a good time in a simple approach. Many many people LOVE this approach, more peacefully. Those people attract good vibes, positive attitudes and good souls. Even Good Karma!

"Drama" is used to describe someone who does not respect making a scene for no reason or someone obviously is not considerate mouthing bad things in front of people that you don't know which that is not called for. Or Anyone who brings personal problems, troubles, and (or) b*llsh*t to people every day. Those people attract bad vibes and negativity.

So, um..., who would you want to hang out in a crowd around that a drama queen (eye-rolling big mouth-motor with attitude, *snap*) in that scene, or would you hang out with peaceful high-spirited cute guys having a good time (smiling and chuckling) over there? If it's for me, I would walk over to the cute guys who know how to enjoy better.

Do you see the difference? That's what I mean is that I want a great guy WHO doesn't make a trouble or cause a trouble in a scene. I want a peaceful, cool, harmonious guy that can relax in a scene and enjoy the Life. That's what I so attract to the drama-free guys.

Are you saying all deaf guys are "drama queens?"

03-04-2009, 11:17 PM	#36 (permalink)
~Kaelei~ Registered User Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Vancouver, Washington Posts: 1,571	I have dated both, hearing and Deaf.... but personally I prefer hearing boyfriend over deaf boyfriend. The experiences I had with deaf boyfriend was not all that great....too much drama. But the experiences I had with hearing boyfriends are great...I felt so connected to them and it's just easier for me to connect with them. My Hubby is hearing...and he knows some signs...and I'm grateful that he's learning my deaf culture...it's shows me how much he cares and how much he wants to be part of my life. I think it depends on a person...it depends on the personality and everything. __________________

03-16-2009, 10:14 PM	#39 (permalink)
I Shed Misery Registered User Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Lebanon, PA Posts: 88	I have only dated Hearing guys only (not really dated and I was with this one hearing guy, no wait two but he was a clingy byotch lol) The second one loved to date deaf guys lmao. WEIRD-O! I'm sorry I don't feel so comfortable dating a guy who is deaf or hard of hearing. I'm HOH. I dunno I feel much more comfortable with a guy who is hearing. Not because he has the ears but I don't know haha. I grew up as a hearing person so I'm used to them. Well, if he was HOOOOOOOOOOOT! HELL YEAH! I would!! Seriously, I do everything a hearing person does. I love music, I love to hear... EVERYTHING! I just want someone to do the same things I can do. __________________

03-21-2009, 11:32 AM	#50 (permalink)
pathymo Registered User Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Brooklyn Posts: 61	I would love to date a deaf guy. Crazy that in NY I haven't met one yet :-( guess I don't know where to look. I'm hearing and have always dated hearing. But deaf guys turn me on ... :-) __________________ http://www.garritguadan.com I'm..... sort of famous.

03-21-2009, 12:07 PM	#51 (permalink)
GarnetTigerMom Registered User Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Virginia Posts: 4,958	It's dont' really matter which boyfriend is better hearing or deaf. So, really the only difference between deaf and hearing is the commuication and education levels. But if a guy got a good heart and personality,, go for it! But remind yourself if you date a guy make sure you check his background before you get too serious with a guy. A guy might have a bad track record for hurting women or criminial record. If he got a bad criminal record, DUMP HIM! he not worth all the risk! :-) __________________ GarnetTigerMom "The rain may be falling hard outside, But your smile makes it all alright. I'm so glad that you're my friend. I know our friendship will never end." -- Robert Alan

04-05-2009, 10:40 AM	#54 (permalink)
ASLGAL Registered User Join Date: May 2007 Location: Ohio Posts: 763	It didn't say no hearing folks ideas in this thread so.... I would have to say that D/deaf vs Hearing would be down on the list of what I might want in a boyfriend. I thought about the question and if my hubs(HOH) were no longer here and I had to think about dating again I would not discount any good person because they were D/deaf or Hearing. I would look at all their attributes. __________________ "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing" ~ Edmund Burke~ "When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser" ~ Socrates ~

02-26-2009, 12:06 AM	#31 (permalink)
rickoshay13 Registered User Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 1	okay, this is my first post on this site.... I am hearing and an ASL student, and gay. To be honest I dont think it matters if the person you want a relationship with is hearing or not, if the guy that you make sparks with is dedicated and loving enough then you will work something out, whether he learns sign, or if you can use your voice or whatever the case may be- And Id say if its mixed, hearing a deaf or HOH then Id say you're getting the best of both worlds To be honest I wish I could sign much more fluently! (I suppose this is why I am taking the classes!) Id love to meet a cute boy to practice signing with

Today
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03-02-2009, 10:19 PM	#35 (permalink)
blairtheblur Registered User Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Chicago, IL Posts: 22	Hmm. I'm a hearing ASL student and I think ASL is such a beautiful language that I instantly think a guy is cuter if he's deaf. I know, it's strange. :/

03-16-2009, 10:54 PM	#49 (permalink)
Tousi Registered User Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 15,733

04-04-2009, 10:59 PM	#52 (permalink)
MitchIndy Registered User Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Indy, Indiana Posts: 4	I'm Deaf and Gay (obviously) from Indianapolis. I dated both hearing and Deaf guys. Speaking from experiences, I prefer Deaf guys because the communication were great and I didn't have to worry about hearing guys talking about me orally in front of me since they think I can't lip read very well. Also, some would try to take advantage of me due to the fact that I am Deaf and thinking I wouldn't stand up for myself. The only con about dating Deaf guys is that nothing is private with them but if you really love and trust him, you should have nothing to hide. If I ever meet a nice, sweet hearing man who treats me right who wants a serious relationship, that would be wonderful for me.

04-05-2009, 05:56 PM	#55 (permalink)
lemontree Registered User Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada Posts: 132	i think i would perfer to date someone deaf or hoh simply for the common experience and understanding of having crappy hearing. in my experiences of dating and relationships all the hearing people i dated ended up dumping me or doing the "i'm just not into you" (like from that book/movie) saying it wasn't gonna work out between us coz of the communication problems and that they were tired of trying to understand me or be understood by me (too much writing on paper or repeating our words, i guess), and that it wasn't fun to have to stop watching the hockey/football/baseball game to explain what what was going on, or not doing things coz i wasn't able to hear the music or whatever. so yeah, seems like i would get along better and not have communication problems with a deaf or hoh person, or could i be wrong? also, pickings are pretty slim out there for me as i would want to be with someone who has the same education level as me (PhD) and here in Canada it is like winning the lottery, pretty rare, lol.

04-09-2009, 08:30 PM	#56 (permalink)
Endy Registered User Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 239	I am Deaf. That depends on individuals. One day I want to have a Deaf BF but I'd rather not due to everyday drama and all-time negativity. I have a hearing lover, he is amazing - Drama-free and has great positive attitude all times. I so attract to him because of his positive attitude - That's what I am looking in the relationship --- Drama-free and Positive Attitude. He has terrible eye/hand coordination learning signs, so we created homemade signs that something is easy on his hands. We are very cool about it. I'd love to run into some Deaf guy that has Drama-free and awesome Positive Attitude, it'd be more likely for me to attract to.

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