Wolfboy

I hope I dont offend you with this question. I want know when did you first found out that you are gay, bi, lesbian and how you take it.

If I offended you please forgive me

__________________

You brought out the wolf in me

Deafness

__________________
This advertising will not be shown in this way to registered members.
Register your free account today and become a member on AllDeaf.com

javapride

heywolfboy thanks for asking this kind of question AND no its not offensive to me, shows u are curious in all aspect and do apperticate ur being considerate.

I found out i was a lesbain when it was 1989 i hadn t come out right then but i did learn some new things about it, see i was just turning 18 at the time and 18 is the time of identy crisis, took me a yr to relize this was the right thing for me, I came out in 1991 to my mother and u can find out that answer in the *how ur parents reacted* that IDD set up, but to me, it wasn t JUST a choice it also felt like the right thing for me, and i for one am happy i made that decision, it may seem to me that i have been a lesbain my whole life but im still * tracing*back to my past to see when it really started for me. It remains to be seen.

So hence my saying IM out and a proud lesbain

nozobo

You never did offend me... it's a good place to ask unless you have intent to insult someone... when I realized I was gay... hmmmm... lemme think... I must be in 2nd or 3rd grade I was playing with a boy in the bathroom for short time... that's when I start to feel about boys... After that I never thought about that until 6 or 7th grade I felt it again... I tried to think it was wrong and ignore it so decide to date girls and I didn't have a feeling for girls... so after that I knew I had a feeling for a man... Hope that answer your questions...

__________________

My roots are planted in the past
And though my life is changin' fast
Who I am is who I wanna be...

Wolfboy

No no I dont plan to insult anyone at all. Just that my one of my sis's friend is gay and he a drag queen but when I ask the same question I asked you here he went *gasp* and left mad. It was puzzled by this cuz it was a harmless question so I never want to ask that question again cept here since you are all nice.

Thanks for the info.

__________________

You brought out the wolf in me

javapride

it's obvious that guy was a senstive **** who seems to think its a shame thing to ask questions there is NO shame in asking anything Sorry if i offended ur friend but u know he needs to cut the drama and be nice u were being curious anyhow

deafbrutha

It's not an offensive question.....but it does get tiring cos no one ever asks a straight person when they first found out they were straight. Our culture teaches us that it is the norm. It is tiring in the same way as us deafies get mad cos hearing keep asking us, when did you go deaf ad infinitum.

However, to answer your question in the spirit of curiosity, I've known I was gay since I was four. That's as early as I can go. And no, I cannot recall ever being attracted to girls [it's DICK or NOTHING BOYS! ]

Anything else you would like to know? when did I have my first :3some: perhaps? :buttsex: :bj: :69: But come over here dear let me give u a

If we bring out the wolf in you, you bring out the
in me

Cheers

VamPyroX

I don't understand how a person could find out if he's gay/lesbian. I thought that was something they decided, not something they happened to already be?

__________________
Check out my city... CLICK HERE!
(If you've already visited yesterday, visit again today!)

LinuxGold

It can happen in both ways. It greatly depends on where you are, i.e. peer pressure, curiousity, being raped and so on. It can be either a resultant of scenario or inner desire that concidentially came up differently than the norms.

javapride

HE said what i was planning to say! thanks U READ MY MIND!

LinuxGold

You're welcome. It pays to take Human Communication class in College.

deafbrutha

I don't think you can make someone Gay from peer pressure, if anything it's pressure to be straight, sorry, heterosexual. Being raped doesn't make influence someones sexuality, sexuality is a desire you have and you find out about it when you respond to something or someone, for example, in my case, I look at girls and the world just does not move, but when I looked at boys, I went AHHHHHHHHHHH MENNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!

Oh Lord!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LinuxGold

Peer pressure begat encouragement, encouragement begat curiousity and eventually curiousity begat the uniqueness of how they are. Take the hint?

javapride

I have to say yes peer pressure, i ll explain why? the teens today usually are under peer pressures of the norms, BUT not always! some just have a natural comfort zone of being a lesbain or gay, it s all in the norms of how we feel. not BY CHOICE just by natural feelings.

Wolfboy

Nah no worries. Its my sis friend.

__________________

You brought out the wolf in me

Wolfboy

Sorry im straight.

And the rest of the postes. Interesting. Im learning. Thanks you all.

__________________

You brought out the wolf in me

ideafspy

I think that deaf people out there are just being prevent even I am not gay. I just don't get it and even I went to State School for the Deaf. It seem different than what I have see. My friend turn out to be gay from mainstream. I studden and puzzle because I don't used with those thing.

When I enter the boy dorm. Most of the time I see is sissy those boys run around. I think that just about sex for that boy dorm even girl dorm. I heard many time they were bust and end up got hurt themselve. I think that not possible right for them as hurt. I am not going to say the name of school for the deaf. Prephare that happen to you or rest of the deaf campus. Sometime I think that Deaf people who is leb or gay come from somewhere like images, touch, and feel?

I learn that it just in your mind image of fansty your best friend, friend or even family. It all about value self that destory from childhood and fobid themselve to date woman or male because they don't understand themsevle into twist from family, pressure, and friend. For example; I have friend that must have sex the whole time and no matter what. What a doggie friend I have, eh? Those people need is a love.

Sometime, they are try to impress that they are so proud gay or leb but so what? Why is that so important being pride gay/leb than being glad who or what we are. It just too confuse to look at there many are splites multi-cultures. Sometime, I think thats wrong at begin. I realize.. the people need is love. Not mainly is sex as equal love. Love is big thing than anything else.

Speaking about the God. Some of you know or aware. I am not preaching about that one. I have heard many people is preaching to gay/leb that god hate them or will not forgiven for do it. It all choas. The thing person is preaching have no love. Just harsh or bitching out to those people. Well.. the people made their choice.

I learn that gay is not my type because what? it just because I learn from my family? What is that suppose be? I raise the love from family and then I choose the people that person will be my love forever until we die together.

The bother me is that why too many gay or leb break up the whole entire year? IT just sex, relationship, or body looks? You konw what I am saying?? I hope that nothing insult the rest above that I have message.

People might not try to understand, "Why my son/daughter turn out being leb/gay!?!?" I wonder that most your fear when you get that message from the parent?

__________________
Let the star inner your heart be blast dark sky where there will be a bright kingdom.

deafdyke

I have a question for you VamProx...did you consciously decide to be attracted to girls?
Could you say that you could choose to sexually desire men? Hetrosexuals don't choose to be attracted to the opposite sex, and GLB people don't choose to be attracted to the same sex.
Why does a piece of skin automatically turn sexual desire into a choice?
I know so many GLB people who would give almost anything to be straight! You have probaly never sat with a crying friend, who is agonizing over their sexuality or manned a hotline for sucidal GLB teens, or met a homeless teen who got kicked out of their house for loving someone!
There are what I like to call the Kinkies...GLB folk who consecuously choose to be gay...but they aren't gay b/c they happen to love someone who happens to have the same piece of skin as them...they are gay b/c it's so gosh-a-rootie KINKY!
I have loved women and men...but I would love them no matter which piece of skin they had! I don't go around thinking "Oh that person has a penis...I'll fall in love with him" I fall in love with the PERSON, not the outer attribuates of a person!
WTF? Nobody has ever gone gay b/c they have been raped! Are you one of those people who think that all GLB folk are out to recruit little kids?

SilenceGold

deafdyke, you don't make sense. :/

deafdyke

SG, what do you mean I don't make sense?

SilenceGold

All of those that are bolded...are either what I didn't understand or your own conclusions that are too broad.

For example, "Nobody has never gone gay b/c they have been raped!" You said, "nobody" while there are actually few people did....here's my source of proof that deblunkers your "nobody" theory.

When you argue...you gotta to use facts to back up your story....you cannot just settle down and say that your thoughts are facts unless enough of other professionals agree with you. You said too many things that goes oppose of "nothing is impossible." That's why I said that your post didn't make sense.

deafdyke

Goldy, for some reason the bolds weren't showing up when I used Netscape. However now that I am using IE they are.
Let me address your post in it's entirirty. Piece of skin refers to the genitalia (hope nobody minds me using that word, but I guess since we're all adults here I won't get banned)
Why does a loving sexual relationship between two people suddenly turn into a "choice", simply b/c those two people have the same genitalia?
Why does a penis on a person make my love "nautral and right" but if I fell in love with a person who has a vagina that makes my love "a choice and unnautral" ? I fall in love with the person...not the fact that they have a specific genitalia! If my first crush had been a boy, I would have loved them just as much! Do you understand now? I seem to recall, that you're married. Let's say rhetorically that your husband was a woman.
Wouldn't you love him just as much? You don't love him b/c he happens to posses a penis correct? You love him b/c he's a person you love deeply. Do you understand now?
There are some people in the LBG community who choose to have LBG sex, but that doesn't nessarly make them LBG. They are just into the whole scene b/c it's trendy and KINKY not b/c they love someone who happens to have a penis or a vagina.
Second of all, were there any particular sites that you wanted me to go to? I want to say more but I gotta run. Will finish addressing your post later.

SilenceGold

Ok I understand your thingy about "piece of skin" better.

I've thought about it..."What if I found out that Lisa had a penis?"

Would that stop my loving? It's a hard question. :p

deafdyke

OK...I'm back. Anyway let me go into more depth on the subject of the trendy KINKIES! These are a group which is made up of people who are into the whole GLB scene b/c "all that type of secks is like you no so tReNdY!" They may perform homosexual sex acts but they are not GLB.
They are simply sexual hedonists/voyerers/adventureers. They are into the whole scene not b/c they love someone who happens to posses a penis or a vagina or b/c they aren't attracted to males/females
but b/c they are so turned on to the whole KINK factor!( people like Tristan Taromino, guys who have sex in public bathrooms/at reststops etc) Do you understand now?
Now, as for the links...which sites did you want me to check out?
Now, those links may seem to prove that rape causes homosexuality, but a very quick analysis would prove that is incorrect. First of all, look very closely at the sites you sent me to...Virtually all of those sites are by very hyperconservative, pro-family "homosexuality(and everything else that devitates from the conservative American suburban norm) is evil" organizations. Second of all, you fell into their trap very easily! They want you to think that homosexuals have such overpowering lust that they are driven to rape people or that they recruit people (to the homosexual cause) by going around and raping
people, or that hetrosexual rape causes homosexuality.
Fact of the matter is, that it doesn't specify what kind of rape the GLB people suffered. For all you know many of the rapes could probaly be sort of like what happened in Boys Don't Cry, where the girl passing as a guy was raped by two hetro boys when they found out that he was a SHE!
I think I remember reading somewhere (in Our Bodies Ourselves or one of those GLB safety pamphlet things) that out lesbians are at very high risk for hetrosexual rape b/c hetro males think that they can prove to lesbians that hetro sex is "better" then lesbian sex.
I'll have to check that out....but just b/c there may be a high rape rate in the GLB world, that does not mean that rape can cause someone to turn gay!
Oh, and before you bring up NAMBLA (North American Man-Boy Love Associaion) research has shown that most members of NAMBLA are HETRO!!!!! (they diddle little boys "on the side") There is a very high rate of kids who have untreated sexually abuse who turn into child molesters, yes but that is NOT about homosexuality! That is about the effects of untreated sexual abuse!
Most rape and most child molestation (even same-sex child molestation) is committed by hetrosexual males!!!!

Fly Free

Deafdyke -- u have a valid argument and i agree with u

with a well said argument!

__________________
Enjoying life!

javapride

IM going to be printing this out first thing tomorrow when im at the internet cafe ( have an errand to do anyhow) and this is a WONDERFUL factor of information i ever saw! U made wonderful points of arguement and i d like to keep this thoughts in all aspect for my own future reference if i ever get posed a question. THANKS

LeviathanC

I refused to being a homo, PERIOD.

SilenceGold

Ok, you made it clear about Kinky people who just wants to have harmless fun with no boundaries...with added thrills.

"quick analysis" is also known as making assumptions which you didn't fully check to make sure that you didn't make a mistake of saying "nobody" became homosexual because of a hostile relationship with opposite sex partner.

I don't believe everything that I hear, read, or even see. I just made a link to those sites for you to check it out to deterimine for yourself to make sure you didn't make a mistake of saying the word, "nobody." I didn't post this link to for you to critizice and claim that it's established by hyperconservative people.

I'll like to see the proof of your "research has shown that most members of NAMBLA are HETRO!!!!!" Where can I read on this?

We're not talking about molestation. I'm not stupid to think that molesters became homosexual because of being molested in their early ages.

When would I ever hear a source of your information that you have gave to us?

Wolfboy

Hey hey whats going on here?

__________________

You brought out the wolf in me

javapride

a GOOD debate is whats up wolfyboy LOL!

deafdyke

Thanks Jav and FF! You grrrls rock! Pick up the latest edition of Our Bodies Ourselves for some more really good reading! I'll have you debating on the Ms. boards someday!!!! (insert dyke feminist grrrl smiley here)
SilenceGold, If people became gay due to a hostile opposite sex partner, you'd have virtually no hetrosexual people around. We all run into jerks and boors and losers who mess up relationships. I have...it hasn't turned me hetro.
You're thinking that most lesbians are the stereotypical manhater types who were made barren by idoit men. Virtually all the lesbians I know, like men and can relate to them. As a matter of fact, the biggest manhater I know is hetrosexual!!!
As for the info on NAMBLA, I think I either read it in a Boston Globe article around the time Jeffery Curley was killed (I live near Boston) or
read it on the Better A Millstone site (an anti-NAMBLA site) I'll be back with links for you to read.