KristinaB

I don't really think about it much. Just enough that hubby and I have talked about what we want and things like that. I was always brought up to believe that once we are gone, there is no more suffering and no more pain. I can look forward to that, but quite frankly, even though I deal with so much pain right now, I am thankful that I have it and can be with the family.

Whatever will be, will be.

__________________
Taking life one day at a time.

Deafness

__________________
This advertising will not be shown in this way to registered members.
Register your free account today and become a member on AllDeaf.com

kokonut

Definitely. My family, my friends, relatives,and co-workers are what keeps us going. And we'll remember each other, our families especially, probably for several generations worth after we die. But in 10,000 years...phhtt! Gone. Nothing to remember about. Buried under the billions and billions of faces of the past.

__________________
Before AD.

After AD.

"Restriction on free thought and free speech is the most dangerous of all subversions. It is the one un-American act that could most easily defeat us."
-Thurgood Marshall, former Supreme Court Justice


"... turns out they are telling the truth."

whatdidyousay!

I know a lot of people that dies young ,my best girlfriend dies when she was
40 yo of a brain tumor. She dies a few weeks before her first grandchild was going to be born. My friend was born the same month and year as me.
Because I have know so many people that had dies I really do not worry about my mortality , I know there is nothing I can do to stop it and I have no fear of dying and if I where dies right now at my computer I would be fine with it.
Dying is apart of life.
I am sorry to hear about the lost of your friend.

jillio

Yep. Because in the grand scheme of things, none of us as individuals matter. To let people believe that they are having some huge impact is to enable a delusion.
Is snarkiness the best you can do?

Beach girl

Unless you happen to be found under the ice on a glacier in Austria....

I'm not so much concerned about 10,000 years ago. I am concerned about the here and now, trying to make the world a better place.

And the older I get, the more I realize how much my early childhood memories meant to me, so I try to do little things for children generally, and for the little ones in my family particularly. I hope that some of the things I've created for the new baby, for instance, will be used by her and perhaps others to come, and eventually might be passed down to the next generation, if they're still usable.

jillio

10,000 years ago was not the reference. 10,000 years in the future was the reference. I guess you missed that in your attempt to get your snarkienss delivered quickly.

Beach girl

I'm not the one being snarky.

I believe every one of us matters. We don't have to make a huge impact as the world sees it, but we can make a huge impact on the lives of those close to us.

Cheetah

Please leave this thread.

jillio

Believe as you will. And I will believe as I will. And yes, you are indeed being snarky. As usual.

Reba

Everyone matters now.

Why on earth would you ask such a personally insulting question? Can't you ever leave anything alone?

Beach girl

Nope, not at all. Just asking a straight-forward question. I'll assume your answer is indeed the best you can do.

Bottesini

I am certain that my life matters, if only in a small way, to those I love.

__________________

Beowulf

I don't think about whether my life will make a difference later. I have too much living right now to break focus.

__________________
.

Cheetah

That's pretty much the same view my GF has. I appreciate the fact that she can talk about this and in fact tried to do so last night after her grandfathers funeral at the graveyard. She asked me what kind of tombstone I liked best as we were still at the family graveyard. But I could not talk about it. It was a very private and intimate experience as we placed his urn in the ground ourselves. She took me around and introduced me to about 5 generations of her family. She showed me her uncle who died young, children that she never knew, grandparents of grandparents and where family lines merged and diverted. Even showed me where her plot is and that of the rest of her family that is still living. Her family has some of the healthiest views on death of any family I have ever met. I want her to take me back again sometime this summer when I can be more there with her than I was yesterday.

jillio

Can't you?

Anything to contribute to the thread?

Cheetah

Last week I probably would have said the same thing. Right now, I envy you.

Dixie

I will tell you what I think:

I hope I will make some sort of positive impact. It might not be a big one. I might not even make an impact at all, but my end goal is I hope I have left people with good memories and helped people in some way along this journey we call 'life'.

At the same time there are things I want to accomplish before I die. I don't want to die just a 'chicken farmer that never quite got it right in life'. I want to be able to leave my DD some things such as being able to continue on in life in a positive way, meaning I want to leave her something meaningful. Something that will make her want to carry on.

What scares me the most? Having to leave my DD behind. At the same time, I also believe a parent should never have to bury their own child, but sadly it still happens due to circumstances beyond one's control such as a car wreck, freak accident, terminal illness, war, natural disasters, etc. I want my DD to out live me. Still, the thought of leaving her for eternity scares the crap out of me.

The things I want to do before I die are lengthy. I want to finish college, get a good job, fly in an airplane or helicopter, travel abroad, go see the sights that this world has to offer such as NYC, London, Sydney. There's also a road trip to visit the lower 48 and the chances to visit both Alaska and Hiwaii. I also want to go see the ocean which I have never seen in my life. I also want to pursue the American dream - own my own home, have a decent car, have a decent job, and have a family.

Will I get to do all these? Not likely at the rate I'm going. It's my belief that my eternity is secured in my faith. So with that taken care of, I just try to live in the here and the now and not worry too much about what I can't avoid.

Like most people, I hope I have peaceful death. I prefer to go in my sleep when I'm old, you know, go lay down for an afternoon nap and step into eternity.

That's just my thoughts on it.

__________________
Oh, you will. It is all a dream and since matter cannot be created nor destroyed, the dreams must be real in all their myriad forms. -Beowulf
This Delicate Thing God Has Made
The world is measured in peasants; smaller than a unicorn but, bigger than a tidbit!

jillio

Absolutely. In the grand scheme of things...not so much.

jillio

Actually, as far as you are concerned it is.

Beach girl

That sounds like a nice moment.

It's getting increasingly rare for families to all live and die in the same spot, so I'm guessing that some of these family plots with many generations will get increasingly rare.

That said - on my maternal grandmother's side, we have a plot with both grandparents, my mom's first child (born alive, died a few hours later), my brother, my aunt, and my mom. My mom and brother were both cremated, so that left extra space. There is a plot for my still-living uncle. It is nice to see the family history there, even though that 3-generation space doesn't really go that far back.

My dad's family also has a multi-generational plot, and that tells quite the story of immigration, national service (dad served in WWII and his rank is on the tombstone), and family tradition.

Beowulf

Don't worry. Be happy because you can go back to that state of mind.

__________________
.

kokonut

How about keeping the same plot and when a family member dies bury her/him in a coffin. The next one dies, have his/her body cremated and put the ashes on top or perhaps a few inches below ground and put the sod back on top. Repeat this with other family members. And just keep adding the names on a tombstone?

__________________
Before AD.

After AD.

"Restriction on free thought and free speech is the most dangerous of all subversions. It is the one un-American act that could most easily defeat us."
-Thurgood Marshall, former Supreme Court Justice


"... turns out they are telling the truth."

rockin'robin

...Ahhh...NO...don't wanna anybody on top of me!...Suppose you had to deal with a relative during ur life time (not getting along)...then having them on top of you when ur dead?.....

Which comes to mind:....when all my days are over....and my time has come to pass....I hope they bury me upside down....and the World can Kiss My Ass!

kokonut

How about having grandma on your ring?
LifeGem - Memorial Diamonds created from a lock of hair or cremated remains / ashes / cremation

__________________
Before AD.

After AD.

"Restriction on free thought and free speech is the most dangerous of all subversions. It is the one un-American act that could most easily defeat us."
-Thurgood Marshall, former Supreme Court Justice


"... turns out they are telling the truth."

kokonut

Here's an interesting link.

The 10 Weirdest Things You Can Do With Your Ashes

Maybe use grandma ashes and have them tattooed into your skin for remembrance?

__________________
Before AD.

After AD.

"Restriction on free thought and free speech is the most dangerous of all subversions. It is the one un-American act that could most easily defeat us."
-Thurgood Marshall, former Supreme Court Justice


"... turns out they are telling the truth."

Bottesini

I like that idea. The Victorians made mourning jewelry with the hair of their dead loved ones.

__________________

Beach girl

They do something like that in Brazil. It's called "renting" a burial space. (Many are above-ground, in masoleum-type structures.)

The first time I read about it, I thought my Portuguese was failing me, because surely no one would "rent" a burial space. But they do. When the body turns to bones and dust, it's out with the old, in with the new. So to speak. The bones are collected and burned or buried, and the most recent dead body takes its place, again renting the space for a few years before in turn, out they will go to make way for someone else.

Re: being buried on top of another person: also not unusual. They do that in the U.K. quite often. Not surprising, I guess, since it's a very small, densely populated island. My parents-in-law died within a few months of each other, with mom-in-law going first. She was buried normally. When dad-in-law died 3 months later, her coffin was removed, the grave further excavated, and she was re-buried deeper. A layer of soil was then put on it, and he was buried in the same plot, a foot or so above her coffin.

I was startled to learn that was how they did it, but it is indeed very common there, I've learned. That's how those smallish church graveyards can hold a lot more people than you would initially think.

howag

Whatever you choose to do, Cheetah, I hope with time and closure you can go back to a peaceful mind state.

Babyblue

I do think about death from time to time. I do not stress out over it. I do stress more thinking about losing a love one.

kokonut

Especially the little ones!

__________________
Before AD.

After AD.

"Restriction on free thought and free speech is the most dangerous of all subversions. It is the one un-American act that could most easily defeat us."
-Thurgood Marshall, former Supreme Court Justice


"... turns out they are telling the truth."