Just hold me

KingDragon · 03-16-2003, 02:29 PM

I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men & women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Mars & Venus thing. And I never have figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. And, I never yet have figured out how the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do". One evening last week, my wife and I got into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??" So she says the words that I and every husband on the planet dreads. She explains that I'm obviously not in tune with her emotional needs as a "Woman". I'm thinking, "What was her first clue?" I finally realize that nothing is going to happen that night, so I went to bed. The very next day we went shopping at a big department store... I walked around while she tried on three very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to take all three of them. She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth R300 each to which I say OK. And then we go to the Jewellery Dept. where she gets a set of diamond earrings. Let me tell you ...she was so excited. She must have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she cared. I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet because she doesn't even play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I told her that it was OK. She was almost sexually excited from all of this and you should have seen her face when she said, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cash register." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No, honey. I don't feel like buying all this stuff now." You should have seen her face ... It went completely blank. I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "You obviously are not in tune with my financial needs as a "Man." I figure that I should be having sex again sometime during the Spring of 2006...

kevbo · 03-16-2003, 03:02 PM

You have been busted by Mr. Internet Detective.

http://www.youknowdamnright.org/joke...-emotions.html

MDCodeRedFreak · 03-16-2003, 04:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by kevbo
You have been busted by Mr. Internet Detective.

http://www.youknowdamnright.org/joke...-emotions.html

ROFLMFAO !!!

BUSTED !!!

shao · 03-16-2003, 04:20 PM

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KingDragon · 03-16-2003, 04:40 PM

You Don't Know What Is This About? it is a joke u know that didn't you ?

03-16-2003, 05:11 PM

sound like veyr funny eheheh

Jada · 03-16-2003, 06:59 PM

lol, you should post it in jokes & funny stories forum.

03-16-2003, 08:17 PM

sheesh! now he aint replyin... kevbo defienlty owned him.

Steel X · 03-16-2003, 10:28 PM

The girl must be really sexually frustrated eh?

sweetstrawberry · 03-16-2003, 11:08 PM

wickedeyed · 03-16-2003, 11:11 PM

LiLyxLui · 03-16-2003, 11:47 PM

@ this threads

KingDragon · 03-17-2003, 11:07 AM

Why do u think that i was busted? that is not hurt joke I did put some of joke from internet and i did add some joke too. What is different between. So what let is enjoy people to read it.

03-16-2003, 02:29 PM	#1 (permalink)
KingDragon Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 501	Just hold me I never have quite figured out why the sexual urges of men & women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Mars & Venus thing. And I never have figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. And, I never yet have figured out how the sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do". One evening last week, my wife and I got into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??" So she says the words that I and every husband on the planet dreads. She explains that I'm obviously not in tune with her emotional needs as a "Woman". I'm thinking, "What was her first clue?" I finally realize that nothing is going to happen that night, so I went to bed. The very next day we went shopping at a big department store... I walked around while she tried on three very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her to take all three of them. She then tells me that she wants matching shoes worth R300 each to which I say OK. And then we go to the Jewellery Dept. where she gets a set of diamond earrings. Let me tell you ...she was so excited. She must have thought that I was one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she cared. I think she was testing me when she asked for a tennis bracelet because she doesn't even play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I told her that it was OK. She was almost sexually excited from all of this and you should have seen her face when she said, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cash register." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No, honey. I don't feel like buying all this stuff now." You should have seen her face ... It went completely blank. I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "You obviously are not in tune with my financial needs as a "Man." I figure that I should be having sex again sometime during the Spring of 2006...

03-16-2003, 10:28 PM	#9 (permalink)
Steel X Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: North Carolina Posts: 10,627	The girl must be really sexually frustrated eh? __________________

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03-16-2003, 03:02 PM	#2 (permalink)
kevbo I own you. Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Philadelphia Posts: 1,508	You have been busted by Mr. Internet Detective. http://www.youknowdamnright.org/joke...-emotions.html

03-16-2003, 04:20 PM	#4 (permalink)
shao peerless Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 237	LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

03-16-2003, 04:40 PM	#5 (permalink)
KingDragon Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 501	You Don't Know What Is This About? it is a joke u know that didn't you ?

03-16-2003, 05:11 PM	#6 (permalink)
GoldenLeaf74 Guest Posts: n/a	sound like veyr funny eheheh

03-16-2003, 06:59 PM	#7 (permalink)
Jada wanna get dirrty Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 162	lol, you should post it in jokes & funny stories forum.

03-16-2003, 08:17 PM	#8 (permalink)
s i m o n s e z Guest Posts: n/a	sheesh! now he aint replyin... kevbo defienlty owned him.

03-16-2003, 11:08 PM	#10 (permalink)
sweetstrawberry Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 410	LOL

03-16-2003, 11:11 PM	#11 (permalink)
wickedeyed forever tainted Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: a plastic fork factory Posts: 337

03-16-2003, 11:47 PM	#12 (permalink)
LiLyxLui Viet pride Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: FUCK_OFF! Posts: 457	@ this threads

03-17-2003, 11:07 AM	#13 (permalink)
KingDragon Registered User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 501	Why do u think that i was busted? that is not hurt joke I did put some of joke from internet and i did add some joke too. What is different between. So what let is enjoy people to read it.