Frisky Feline

..

Deafness

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Buffalo

The bold is you, right? You get all jazzed up by what we said about our experiences, right? Are you in denial on what had happened to you in the past?????

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“The problem is not that the (deaf) students do not hear. The problem is that the hearing world does not listen. “- Rev Jesse L. Jackson ( American Civil Rights Activist, Minister)

howag

I've replied to your PM, why do i have to explain that i'm 18? :S

Frisky Feline

Yes i got your PM. Thank you for your tme.

So i can answer you as to why i asked, since you live for 18 yrs. You must just gotten out of "secure spot" high school. SO keep your eyes open and see for yourself how out there some of people may be harsh. i will say, about couple of years then you might have some experiences around diverse of people.

That's all i can say.

howag

Yeah i just got your message as well, I appreciate the heads up!

Cheetah

I was quite the idealist when I got out of highschool and well into college. It was not until working a job and trying to be a good husband that I started interacting with the world at large and seeing all the bigitry and hatred and ignorance out there.

Be patience young Padawan!

VacationGuy234

You don't have to ignore anything, however, you do have to not let it affect you.

The world isn't some play sand box were everything is nice and that goes for everyone regardless of race or hearing ability. Just because someone has money or is a certain color does not mean a free ride.

People still have to get up in the morning and live in the real world. Nobody on this planet goes through life without problems and issues. Only a fool sees just the two extremes, one were everyone is audist and one were there are none.

VacationGuy234

And, you're a better person for it...

Cheetah

No, however, the world is better for my being here.

Cheetah

I don't think our opinions on this issue are really all that different. Just our approaches. I believe that yes it does affect me and those around me. I can, to a point, decide how I want to react to something. This, however, has come with age.

I believe it was Shakespeare that said "All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players". We all have roles we play and we can choose how to play those roles. I think it is important to recognize audist when it happens. Recognizing it allows you to choose how to respond to it. I'm not saying that every one is or is not an audist (that would be silly and a frightful world). Many of us here are struggling with a boss or co-workers that make our lives much more challenging than it should ever be. confronting an audist is not always an option. This is the reality that we must face. Do we say something and have a fight on our hands or do we simply turn and look away and pretend that we were not hurt.

If you can go about dismissing the effects on you by audist around you makes me wonder what else you are missing. Sometimes audist behavior simply needs to be addresses before things can improve.

VacationGuy234

You're wrong, there is definitely a need for that question. It is a naive person who believes they are always right and it is an arrogant person who pushes it on others.

The fact of the matter is: Most of the problems between hearing an non-hearing is because of communication not intent. But people choose to make all incidents into racist or audist so they can take a moral high ground. However, that moral high ground has no basis in fact.

Cheetah

Right... if you are a police officer. But we are talking about someone's experience. Should we stop and question each and every poster? Or do we only questions those that have experiences outside our own experience?

VacationGuy234

I don't dismiss the affect, I just choose to deal with it in a more positive way than sulking about it. I don't sit and complain about other people when I could be putting that energy into bettering my own life. Anything other than that does not make sense to me.

There is no difference between those who waste there time promoting bigotry and those who waste there time seeing nothing but bigotry, they are both equally wasting their time.

Cheetah

Ah, so that's what we have been doing... Thanks for clarifying this for us.

VacationGuy234

We should stop and question what we think may be wrong before someone is wrongly tarred and feathered, this is everyone's duty not just a police officer.

Cheetah

There was no taring or feathering going on here. Botti simply relayed her restaurant experience where they substituted food thinking she would not notice the difference. She was upset about this and someone else questions if that really was what happened. I don't see the need to question her honesty or her perception of the situation. I think she relayed them exactly as she intended.

howag

I've already cleared this up, I wasn't questioning what happened. Simply questioning if perhaps her past experiences could have led to a clouding of judgement. I didn't mean to offend anyone.

Buffalo

Are you talking about yourself???? I don't know how young you are. If you are young..... just wait and it will happen to you (that is if you are deaf).

__________________

“The problem is not that the (deaf) students do not hear. The problem is that the hearing world does not listen. “- Rev Jesse L. Jackson ( American Civil Rights Activist, Minister)

Cheetah

Yes you did clear this up.

sallylou

Howag, you just keep digging your hole deeper. Less talk and more listening. Botti happens to be a very respected member of this community. I trust her perceptions. You haven't lived her life and it's not your place to question her perception.

ETA: Bott was assaulted in public yesterday. Please do not question her about this.

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jillio

Are you being purposely obtuse, or do you have that great a lack of understanding of what you say and the implications it carries? Asking if there could have been another reason is questioning whether she was correct in her interpretation. Now you are trying to state that her perception is clouded as a result of past experience. That is not only insensitive, but extremely rude when coming from an adolescent and directed at an adult. What makes you think that Bott is not perfectly capable of recognizing her own bias and not allowing it to get in the way of her judgement? She is deaf, and she suffers from vision loss. She is not stupid, and is more self aware than most people.

It is very easy to be skeptical when you have never had the experience you are questioning. Quite comfortable to sit back in your armchair, accepting the white male privilege that is yours by birth, and minimize the negative social consequences of having been born a bit different from the majority.

You have a lot of growing up to do.

deafskeptic

Botts was assaulted yesterday? I think I missed something.

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Left ear implanted with Med-El on April 24 2007.
Activated on May 9th.
Upgraded to Opus 2 9/10/2010
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Sunshine

Confession thread, ds.

sallylou

Age-ism. Able-ism. Sexism. People have intersectional privileges. A man should know not to commandeer a woman in public. Apparently, the guy was drunk. I would have been very upset.

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jillio

So, working to eradicate bigotry is a waste of time. I can see why you would have that attitude. You have not put a great deal of effort into eradicating your own.

howag

I'm not trying to state that her perception IS clouded. I was simply suggesting that it was a POSSIBILITY when coming to a judgement about the motive of the restaurant.I also don't think she is stupid but like i said i was throwing ideas out.

Can you seriously blame me for thinking that times have moved on when i'm told they haven't just because they gave her the wrong meal twice. That doesn't prove that negative behaviour towards people with disabilities hasn't decreased, it just proves that it still exisits. I assure you i meant no offence by what i said.

jillio

It was completely unnecessary and out of line for you to even suggest it as a possibility. That is what you seem to be incapable of understanding.

Again, you are making assumptions from your position of privilege. That makes your assumption completely invalid. You would do well to read and learn before attempting to draw conclusions or suggest alternative explanations.

deafskeptic

__________________
Left ear implanted with Med-El on April 24 2007.
Activated on May 9th.
Upgraded to Opus 2 9/10/2010
Think Pink.
FREE JILLIO!

howag

At the time I was slightly confused how i could be told i was wrong with that as an example, that is why i asked what i did.

Just out of interest what do you mean my position of "privilege"? Does having the ability to hear make me privileged in life?

jillio

Yes, it does. Your gender adds to that societal privilege, and your race adds to it again.