Celticty

It deffinitely helps me to know what to look out for. It is always good to get the knowledge now instead of trying to get it all quickly if a situation comes up that i may need it.

Deafness

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iaskedalice09

As a Deaf student transferring OUT of mainstream school to a school for the Deaf, I feel bi-bi is the best method. Next year I am going to Ohio School for the Deaf (I love ISD more, but there were custodial issues. Le sigh). My home is a strictly oral one. Most days I prefer voice off ASL but yesterday, I met with someone and my eyes and body were exhausted, so I opted for simcom.

I generally make pretty good grades, but mainstream is awful socially for the Deaf for more reasons than one. Oh, well; I'm outta there!

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Gallaudet, 2014
English and Government major

jillio

Good luck with your transfer to OSD. The social aspects of education are quite often ignored. It's sad that we seem to fail to include the psycho-social development of our children when we look at educational placement.

Deborah

Hi! From your entry, I am assuming that you are a high school student...right? I would love to hear more about your experience in the "regular" high school--and I really hope that you continue to post here when you are a student at the Deaf school so that we can see things from "an inside view." I am also curious about the oral/ASL/Bi-Bi issue--from what you wrote, I am assuming that your family is oral and hearing and that you were raised orally--is that the case? If so, did you learn ASL through Teachers of the Deaf in mainstream schools? I am trying to see if your experience is anything like my daughter's--hearing family/wears hearing aids and hears well with them/learned to speak by listening with her hearing aids/spoken English is her first language and she LOVES to talk/went to mainstreamed public schools and was the only deaf student for years/now wants to go to school with other deaf teenagers--trying to move to Florida and enroll in FSDB--oh, and she is trying to learn ASL through Teachers of the Deaf so that she can communicate with ALL deaf people(those who speak, those who sign, those who do both).

I hope you will pardon my "wordiness"--I just get a bit excited when I meet another deaf teenager who may be feeling as my daughter is feeling. I have found a lot of information from deaf adults who can look back at their experiences in the past as deaf teenagers, but it is rare to actually communicate with a deaf teen who is currently going through these issues. If there is a way to link my daughter into a "deaf teen message board" I would love to do it--she NEEDS that connection and it is hard to find it!

Oh, and one more question--can you tell us a bit more about your feelings in different situations? Like, you said you prefer Bi-Bi--is that usually "voice off"? Is that when you are successfully communicating with others through ASL only? What about when communicating with other "oral deaf" teens? See, my daughter just wants to make some friends her age, who are deaf and wear hearing aids, and who talk to her. She wants to learn sign to communicate with other deaf people too, but she does NOT want to "turn her voice off" or "give up her voice"--she loves to talk too much! As far as I can see, FSDB seems to have a "total communication" kind of atmosphere--from what I have learned from this board, that seems very different than a school that is more "Bi-Bi". My daughter would not feel comfortable in a school where there is a lot of pressure to "turn her voice off"--that just is not for her. Can you tell us a bit more about your feelings about Bi-Bi? I am trying to understand--and I am also seeing how very different deaf schools can be regarding communication issues. In other words, some deaf schools would be a good fit for some, but a bad fit for others--and vice versa. How can we compare based solely on the fact that they are "deaf schools"? We need to know their "communication philosophy" and their "communication atmosphere" to see if they would or would not be a "good fit" for us or our children. I hope that the school that you will be attending is a "good fit" for you--and I hope you have a very happy and successful high school career!

rockdrummer

oops

faire_jour

Deborah,

I feel like you are making a lot of assumptions about your daughter. You say that she is happy that she was raised orally, and that she is glad she wasin the mainstream, but she isn't grown yet. She isn't to the point where she can make these decisions for herself. These things may change....

Celticty

You have a very good point. They usually are never sure exactly of what they really want until they are old enough to decide for themselves.

Deborah

What I have said before is more along the lines of: she is very happy that she can hear with her hearing aids--that one is easy, and unless her hearing changes and she no longer hears as well with them, I can't imagine her ever saying that she regretted hearing through her hearing aids. She loves to hear and hates to not hear--she wants her hearing aids to function properly and complains if they are not. Anyone who gets a lot of benefit from hearing aids will understand that one--but I can also understand how someone who does NOT get much benefit from them would NOT feel that way. As for talking--have you guys ever met someone who is classified as a "motormouth"--someone who talks excessively--someone you sometimes wish would just be quiet sometimes, know what I mean? Well, my mother, who is hearing, is definitely that kind of person--and my daughter who has a hearing loss, her granddaughter, is also that way. I, on the other hand, am hearing but I am not nearly as talkative as my mother and daughter. So when I say that she LOVES to talk, I am not assuming anything--she goes on and on and on sometimes--and she has said that she will never stop--she has said that she cannot imagine NOT being able to talk--to her, that would be like not breathing because it is So much a part of her personality. But I, a hearing person, could be quiet for days and probably be fine--it's a personality thing, really. As for the mainstream experience, she was happy at first, but now, as a teenager, she is not. She actually went to an oral deaf preschool before mainstreaming into public school. She REALLY wants to go back to school at the oral deaf school, but we have moved to a different state and can't really go back--plus, they do not have high school there. Honestly, her "best fit" would be an "oral deaf high school" but there don't seem to be any. The reason this fits her best is because she would love to be in the midst of lots of people just like her. When she asked to go to a deaf school, she has said that she means a school with people like her--wear hearing aids and talk to each other. Since there don't seem to be any oral deaf high schools, then her choice is a deaf school that has lots of people who DO talk. She does say that she wants to learn sign language so that she can communicate with people who do not talk, but she REALLY wants to talk to girls her age who are deaf and can communicate with her in HER language. It will be interesting to see how this all goes for her--if she can make at least one or two friends who are "just like her" that would be great, and a few more friends who use ASL and she can learn to communicate with them too--that would be a bonus!! All I am saying is that SHE would be very uncomfortable in a school where very few people talked to her--that would be just as bad as a mainstream environment where she sometimes gets ignored. As she grows, she may learn more sign language and she may spend time in a "silent world" sometimes, but she is NOT profoundly deaf so she would have to take off her hearing aids and plug her ears to make things silent. For some people who consider themselves "deaf", they sometimes can still hear a lot and can never really be in a silent world unless they wear something on their ears to completely mute the sounds around them. Anyway--there are a lot of people who are not profoundly deaf who still consider themselves deaf, they enjoy hearing what they can hear with hearing aids, and they enjoy speaking because it comes fairly easily for them once they learned to listen through their hearing aids. It isn;t that far fetched to think that some people with hearing loss actually enjoy hearing what they can hear and actually enjoy speaking. That is what she says--plus, her talkative personality just shines through and she seems to have no desire to curb that part of her. So, she does love to hear and speak and is glad to be "oral deaf"--BUT she is not so happy being in the mainstream as the only (or only one of very few) oral deaf students. She is unhappy being the only one who is deaf in the middle of a "hearing school" and she would be unhappy being the only one who is "oral deaf" in the middle of a deaf school where no one talks to her--neither one seems to be a perfect fit for her. That is why I am trying to make sure that she goes to a deaf school that is "total communication"--I guess that is the correct term. And I am wondering if schools that are Bi-Bi are very different than TC schools--and how can parents know which schools have which philosophies and environments. She may change her mind about a LOT of things as she ages--but when I have met or known people who can be classified as "very talkative" they usually don't change that part of their personality as they age. I am just making my "assumptions" based on her talkative personality--she never seems to want to stop talking even when she is asked to be quiet. Some people are just like that--hearing or deaf. All I know is that I love her dearly no matter what--if she had been more like me and was less talkative, that would be fine, too. She is who she is--people should not assume that because she is deaf that she would prefer to NOT talk--her personality is not a quiet one in situations where she feels comfortable. But the mainstreaming issue--now that is one that has changed for her through the years--she used to be happy in the mainstream and now she is not--and I am willing to do whatever I need to do to make things right so that she WILL be happy--thus the move to a different state so that she can attend a deaf school that seems to fit her the best. All I want is for her to be happy--I am definitely willing to make any and all changes that are needed to achieve the best environment for her. She is such a sweet person--I am SO proud of her!

jillio

All due respect, but perhaps your daughter cannot imagine any other way because she knows no other way. She has no basis for comparison. Many a hearing parent has assumed that their child was happy with an oral umbringing and that they had no desire for any other way, when actually it was that they had no other way to compare their existence to. You can learn a lot from the deaf adults who were beleived by teachers and parents to be perfectly happy as oral deaf children and teens, who got by with their HAs and their oral skill, and then talk of the feeling of being whole and complete for the first time in their lives when they found the deaf/Deaf community and ASL. It is a very common story.

read2mama

The reason I joined the forum, to get exactly this type of perspective. My severely hearing impaired son is mainstreamed, very verbal and outperforming most kids his age academically but I'm not sure I understand the emotional challenges.

His behavior is often problematic and it's difficult to know how much is from hearing loss and how much is other problems. Sometimes it seems that maybe if he had been to a deaf school, I'd at least be able to make that differentiation. Deaf school teachers who have worked with him don't seem to think the behavior issues are hearing-related but I'm not so sure.

What makes school and socializing harder is that most adults (and consequently the children around them) feel comfortable ignoring his special needs simply because he is performing so well. The attitude is like: "I know he can hear me" or "With his hearing aids he's just like any hearing child".

The concept of him having to make more effort to hear just doesn't seem to penetrate most adult brains regardless of how many times I say it. (There are many solutions for those who can't hear, but seemingly none for those who won't ).

When he was younger, I never seriously looked at ASL because he has enough residual hearing to communicate orally. Now I sometimes wonder if I should have given that (and deaf school) more consideration. Our experience makes me feel that perhaps bi- is the way to go.

Deborah

Can someone give me a more detailed description of a Bi-Bi school--as compared to a Total Communication school? I am really trying to understand--I think I am getting it, but I am not sure I have actually seen Bi-Bi "in action." Also, is there a web site or other resource that kind of compares deaf schools throughout the US--especially when it comes to communication philosophies and environment? It is clear what an "oral school" is like--their communicaton philosophy and environment is clearly stated. But it seems that deaf schools can vary greatly on this issue--is there a way to research other schools without having to drive to many different states? Sometimes when I check out the school web sites, it isn't always so clear what the environment is like there--of course, they all want to put forth their best image on their web sites and they all will brag about being "the best". Parents need a more unbiased resource--just a straight forward description about various schools. I guess a wonderful resource would be message boards for each school where parents could talk about their children's experiences there. You know how many schools are sometimes discussed on Great Schools.com? A place like that to discuss each deaf school would be SO helpful to parents! If anyone knows of anything like that please let us parents know--it could be VERY helpful. Not everyone can move their child to a different state to attend a certain state school for the deaf, but it would be helpful to have a place to compare and contrast them--and to really explain the communication environment at each school would be great!

Matilda

Jillio!

faire_jour

TC is a very old philosophy. It is a lot of talking and signing at the same time. It has been proven to provide a very bad English model and a very bad ASL model too. Most schools and teachers are moving away from TC.
Bi-bi uses both ASL and English (mostly written, but spoken for students who have the ability and desire) but the key is that they are always seperate. ASL is used as the language of instruction because it is able to be accessed 100% by all children with any level of hearing loss.

As for your daughter not ever being "voice off" herself...time will tell. My very good Deaf friend went to CID (a highly presitigous private oral deaf school) and graduated with honors. She is brillant and so "talkative". I can harldly get a word in and we chat for hours and hours. But since she went to college (MANY years ago) and learned ASL, she barely uses her voice anymore. She still wears a hearing aid, and I know she can lipread very well, ecause she often corrects my interpreting! And she is not the only one I have met with the same story. My daughter's principal at her bi-bi school wears two aids and I had no idea she was even Deaf when she spoke....seriously, I thought she had a retainer, she has a tiny lisp. Again, she uses ASL whenever she can, she won't voice. I have spoken to so many Deaf adults, almost all were raised orally, many thrived, a few failed, but all of them now use ASL as their primary language.

Bebonang

That is exactly what happen to me when I was in both elementary and high school in the mainstream and mostly oral. I really don't understand what is going in the regular hearing classroom but in the special education I tried to understand the teacher with the headphone from her microphone. Later on when I was in the tenth to twelve grades full time in the regular hearing classroom, I had very difficult time to understand the teachers because I did not have any interpreters or notetakers at all. That is why I need ASL in the Deaf program in the schools but we did not have those back in the middle fifties and middle sixties. I tried to protest to the principal along with the other deaf students who were in my special education class. We tried to tell the principal that we want ASL and sign language interpreter and also have one teacher who knows ASL in the special education classroom. But no, the principal said that English sign language or ASL are bad and we should not learn how to use ASL. He wants us to learn lipread and speak oral all the way through which make our life miserable. That is why after I graduate from High School. I was very happy to learn and use ASL all the way and communicate with Deaf people (socialize with Deaf people and Hard of Hearing people with ASL is very important) and we love it very much. That is the reason why hearing mainstream school need to change their thinking that it would be better to have Bi-Bi method than oral method. It is like why do hearing parents sign to the hearing babies but not to the deaf babies, which is not fair and that is the question we are puzzled about. Hearing people don't know what is like to be deaf in our childhood life that is an upside down world and silent. If hearing parents want to sign "baby sign language" to the babies, both hearing and deaf/hoh. That would be great to communicate with all family members who are willing to use ASL just for the child or children only. Just help them and it really make their world a big difference in their lives. I know what I am talking about from my own experience as a Deaf child growing up oral and want to use ASL and be in the Deaf communities. Being is here to stay and don't try to fix her to improve her hearing. Good luck with your daughter and hope she find happiness what she is looking for in her deaf world. Later when she is old enough she will tell you and make the decision on what she want for education program. Give her time.

Deborah

I appreciate the advice from everyone. I am really trying as hard as I can to get my daughter the best education possible. Maybe, when I look back, I did some things right and some things wrong--but I did my very best. I think I did a LOT more for my daughter than some parents would--I refused to tell her, sorry but where we live the resources are not available so you just have to deal with what is here...not everyone CAN move for their kids to get a better education, but I know some people who would NOT go...mostly because THEY didn't want to move. My theory has always been: if they set up a school or resource on the moon and I think it would help my daughter, I would go!! NOTHING will stop me from trying as hard as I can to advocate for her and help her. So we have moved to 3 different places just to find her the help she needed--and now we are going to move again for her upcoming high school years.

What worked in early intervention needed to be changed for her preschool years--what worked during her preschool years no longer worked when she was ready for school--what worked in her elementary years is no longer working in her teen years. And then, what she needs post-high school, hopefully college and training for a career, there will be another move involved--probably just her going off to prepare for her adult life alone. I hope she finds the right resources for herself at that point--I want her to be as independent as possible. We all know "young adults", both hearing and deaf, who seem afraid to go out on their own and conquer the world as free and independent adults. My goal for my daughter is this: to become as educated and prepared as possible so that she will be completely ready/willing/and able to "fly away" on her own when she reaches adulthood.

I would love to see her get a college degree, but she is not sure if she wants to do that--some of it depends on things like making high scores on tests like ACT and SAT--she has trouble with standardized tests. But...with a great high school education, she may make great strides and do fine. Even if she does not end up with a college degree, she needs to achieve as much as she can during high school so that she can be on a good path for her future. In other words, all education is important(each year), but her high school years are very important in determining her future path in life. It is extremely important that she be at the "right school for her" during those years.

As I picture her future, I just don't see a large public mainstreamed high school setting as the best setting for her. I honestly think that she would just get lost in the crowd, not be involved in anything, be ignored, and probably not get such a great education overall. There is a lot of talk around here about the low graduation rate of all high school students in our state--many "regular" kids start high school and drop out before graduating. That would NOT be a good path for my daughter to be on!! Honestly, I don't know what the statistics are in other states, but I think graduation rates are dropping everywhere--average kids are not making it to their high school graduations in public schools all over the US--it makes a parent think twice about sending kids to public high schools!! Still, we cannot afford private schools, and I am not ready to give up on finding GOOD public schools. For my son, he has three more years of high school--he has always been in public school--he seems to be doing fine--I think he will continue to do fine in public schools when we move--I think he will stay in the public school system but in a different state and district. My daughter--private preschool and public elementary and middle school--things went well in the beginning and are beginning to sour now--looking ahead to high school and not seeing good things in the future for her at the big public schools--she needs something different. When looking at big high schools that my son would probably do well in, I just don't think that my daughter would thrive--and maybe not even survive to graduation. For her, I think a GOOD deaf school would be the best thing for her high school years.

If she does go to college, I think one such as Galludet, the one in Rochester, or the one in California(haven't begun to research these much yet) would be good--schools with lots of deaf people instead of going to a "regular" college with little or no deaf people--I think that would be good for her and she would be happy. It will be all up to her by then, though--whatever she chooses, I am behind her 100 percent. Ideally, if she makes a few really close friends during her time at the deaf school during her high school years, maybe some of them can all go off to college together--that would be cool!!

When she was young, I could never even imagine what she would be like as a teenager and young adult--now, she is there and nearing adulthood. What I thought then is very different than what I think now--I made decisions for her based on what I knew at the time. Now, I can see that things I never would have thought would be in the picture (imagine being at an AG Bell convention and talking about Galludet!) are now things we may be considering.

Everything has to be completely based on each individual child--I did some things like other people, and some things differently, based solely on what MY daughter needed--not what other people thought deaf children needed. In the beginning, a hearing parent has NO idea what in the world it means to have a deaf child--please try to understand where we are coming from--we NEVER had ANY idea about ANYTHING regarding deafness until our children were diagnosed as being deaf. Yes, we mourned--of course we mourned--we thought our kids would never hear us say "I love you" and would never say it back. Then, we see other deaf kids who DO say those words and more--it is completely understandable why we, as hearing parents, would like for our kids to talk to us--it is all WE know. But there was NO forcing or meanness or whatever some people may have experienced--I simply gave her hearing aids and talked to her and played with her--lots and lots of love and talking. Soon, without any negative overtones, my daughter just began picking up language orally just as my hearing son had done--she was only slightly behind because she didn't get diagnosed and get hearing aids until she was 19 months old. I just continued to love her and talk to her--oh, and we did introduce signs to her but she stopped using them when she could use the words instead.

Anyway--as hearing parents, that is all we knew and our daughter quickly begun to talk to us--we thought this was a good thing. We were encouraged to get to know people through AG Bell--we heard some of their ideas--some we agreed with and some we did not. For example, we did put her in an oral deaf preschool to help her get her language "caught up" completely before starting school. Some oral schools try to mainstream them early, some seem to want to hold on to them for as long as possible. We decided to move and get her into public school from kindergarten--we left the oral school then. There were some AVT therapists who did not think we should use the special education resources at the public school--but my daughter began showing a need for extra help, so we DID use it--and she improved.

Anyway--time went on and the social issues began to come into play. Now, according to people we met through AG Bell and oral schools, by the time these kids are in high school, they think they should be in the mainstream. That is why there are NO oral schools that go through high school. We have met some of the kids who are in big mainstreamed public schools--you know, the STARS!!--and most of them said things like: I am like everyone else and I have lots of friends--some of them said "who needs deaf friends"--some of them were cheerleaders and homecoming kings/queens and seemed to be fitting in just fine in regular schools. Well, good for them--but my daughter is different. This isn't about being an "oral success" and being able to successfully communicate with hearing people--my daughter can do that just fine. And this isn't about needing highly specialized education because they can't keep up in regular schools--my daughter is doing pretty well academically. This is really about social issues--she WANTS to go to school with people like HER!!! I get it!! So, to all of the AG Bell people and oral school people who don't understand why an "oral success" like my daughter would want to go to a deaf school--to all of those who would act like we are "taking a step backwards" in some way--to all of those who think all deaf teenagers should go to regular mainstreamed schools--they just do not get it--not all, and I think maybe very few--deaf teenagers feel like they fit in "just fine" at regular schools--especially during their teen years.

See, as a parent, I am basing my decision solely on my daughter's needs, not on any specific philosophy or anything. The "oral side" says one thing, the "Deaf community" says another--I have to base my decision on what my daughter needs, not on either sides beliefs. So, that is a hearing parent's perspective. I have changed my views over the years depending on how my daughter is doing. She was happy at times, and not at other times--I am trying to get her back on a track that will make her happy. And I think that one day we will show up at an AG Bell convention or an oral school and tell them WHY they need to be a bit more flexible about some of these issues--plus, I guess we need to also talk to people who don't think any deaf people should talk--my daughter can tell them why she enjoys talking. I am not sure why some people don't seem to think that it is possible for a deaf person to WANT to continue talking. If she ever decides to be silent, that will be fine--I just don't think it is really "her"--and I know her better than anyone else. There must be SOME people you guys know that DO love being in both worlds--that will never give up speaking--surely you don't assume that all deaf people who learn ASL and become part of the Deaf world at times never look back--there surely are some that like to be a part of BOTH worlds. I cannot predict the future, but knowing my daughter, I think she will be very happy in BOTH worlds and will not ever leave either one behind completely. She is blessed, in a way--she will know MANY people in BOTH worlds. I just want to see her become a happy and healthy adult--my intentions are perfectly noble. And I love her exactly as she is--no matter how she "turns out" as an adult, she will ALWAYS be loved!

shel90

As a former oral deaf person who learned ASL at the age of 25, I still use my speech skills when needed and no, I dont do the "pen and paper" route when ordering things or communicating because I worked hard and suffered big time for my speech skills so I will use them. I just wish I had both growing up. Yes, I use my speech skills a lot less now but regardless of how little I use it, most hearing people can understand me most of the time when I do use it so I guess I havent lost my skills. It is the receptive part that was the difficult part for me.

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"Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it."

--- Anonymous

Deborah

My daughter has been exposed to ASL a lot during the past school year--she was in a deaf/hh program at the public school. She learned a bit, but not a lot. She is 13, and if I can get her to FSDB in the next year or so, I hope that she can learn more ASL--enough to become fluent. For those who learned ASL later in life (as opposed to learning from infancy), did you learn simply by watching and communicating with others, did you teach yourself through books/DVDs/ other methods, or did you take classes specifically to learn ASL? I am wondering how my daughter can become more proficient and fluent--does anyone know if they have classes specifically to teach ASL at FSDB, or is it just a "you'll pick it up because you'll be around it" kind of thing? The only thing I worry about, and I didn't get that feeling at FSDB, is the time between arriving at a deaf school and becoming fluent in ASL. When we visited, we saw people talking and signing. We didn't observe any classes that were totally silent and ASL only. I guess that is what a Bi-Bi school would be like--and that really would not be a good fit for my daughter who is just learning ASL. I mean, total immersion can be good in some situations, but not when you are trying to learn other subjects. She would not do well at a school that ONLY used ASL with voice off because she would be lost academically--she is not yet fluent in ASL. She needs to be taught ASL to become fluent. Does anyone have info about this "transition phase" regarding learning enough ASL to be considered fluent?

Debbieaslpr

I am 100% with you. Give what the child needs. I work with children mainstrem and I ajusts to their needs and it works.

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No matter what, no matter how you'll always find the sun comes out. It shines on me. It shines on you. And everyday will be anew.

rick48

I think you should cut Deborah some slack. She is not just making baseless assumptions but relying upon her knowledge of her daughter from her unique role as her parent and as her posts demonstrate, she is a very dedicated, caring and concerned parent who is involved and in tune with her daughter's needs and life. She also has the benefit of those 13 years with her daughter to form the basis of her opinion as to what the future will likely hold for her daughter.

I think we can all agree that no one can predict the future but I think we all understand, at least most of us do, that she is not saying what will definitely happen but what is most likely to occur based upon the present and the past. The fact that the possibility that an improbable event may occur is not a reason to discount what is most likely to occur based upon a parent's extensive experience and knowledge of their own child.

Deborah, I really enjoy your posts, they are truly genuine and heartfelt. I wish you and especially, your daughter best of luck in your school search.
Rick

deafbajagal

There is a heavy question in research regarding language acquisition according to Peter Paul, who does a lot of educational research in this area: Can language be learned through direct instruction or must it be acquired naturally? I'm with Vygotsky on this, especially with deaf children. Deborah, what you will need to do is make sure her IEP reflects her unique communication and academic needs. While she is in class being exposed to ASL - the teachers need to make sure that there are accommodations and modifications that are provided to make sure that she is getting her academic needs met. For example, the teacher can provide an outline of what is being discussed that includes notes, the teacher can use an overhead projector, Powerpoint, or Smartboard that includes what is being presently discusses, etc. The teacher should use a lot of reflective questions to make sure she is catching everything, use study guides, and have frequent one-on-one conferencing. You also can request services in which she can take formal sign language classes at a local community college or even through the school.

The best way for her, and anyone else learning a new language, to learn is through social interaction. Direct instruction is helpful - but it should be used as a supplement. And you should also know that most of us deaf ed teachers are used to this situation...it is VERY COMMON for us to have students come in and do not know sign language. Most of us have already put the accommodations and modifications in our lesson plans for this very reason.

deafbajagal

I agree with you Rick. She's really trying hard to make the right decisions for her daughter and we all should be supportive with words of encouragment.

shel90

Deborah...the school will make accodomations for your daughter if she is not fluent in ASL yet. At my school, we get many children referred from the mainstreamed programs who are oral with absulote no fluency in ASL. We assign staff to work with them using spoken English. The kids pick up on ASL during social time. The reason for this is cuz academics is very important and we dont want any kid to miss out on anything that is being taught and if the kid is not fluent in ASL, we will adjust to meet their needs but with the understanding that both language are always kept separate.

__________________
"Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it."

--- Anonymous

faire_jour

I just don't understand why most parents of deaf children seek advice from places like AG Bell instead of deaf adults. Who knows more about the experience of being deaf, political leader and teacher or actual deaf people...just feels like a no-brainer to me.

rick48

When we were seeking advice for our daughter after she became deaf, deaf adults who were part of AGBell, as well as CICI, were some of the best sources of information and inspiration. If you knew anything about AGBell then you would know that many of its members are deaf adults. Further, the experiences of those who are in constant contact with the deaf community but are not deaf, should not be discounted as they can offer a different perspective.

We sought advice from many who were part of the deaf community and conventions such as AGBell's afforded us the opportunity to meet and talk to literally hundreds of deaf adults, parents of deaf children, deaf educators, audiologists, cochlear implant teams, etc. all gathered in one place. Taking advantage of that opportunity to benefit our daughter was the real "no-brainer".
Rick

coolgirlspyer90

As I was growing up in my childhood years (i'm 14 and a half but will be 15 on august 26th) I had speech therapy for maybe 12 years or 11 years. I had speech therapy when i was 3 or 4 years old. And i'm still continuing on taking speech therapy in order of my parents. But as for sign langauge... I was taught english sign language instead of ASL. I see the difference between english and ASL. My interpreter taught me english when i was in kindergarden and in the first grade. Then I was moved to St.Ritas school for the deaf which is in Ohio and 2 hrs away from my home. But i didn't really like to go to St.Ritas because It was 2 hrs away. So I decided to go back to hearing schools. I always have speech therapy and I use sign langauge with my interperter while talking. I have gone thru so much people that I grew up with, totally seen my difference with my speech. Even my family. With the help of my CI and hearing aid it helped alot. My current interpreter is teaching me a few ASL while I sign english SL. But she understands me pretty good. She graduated in Wright state Collage in ohio when i was in the 6th grade which was 2006. so she has been my interpreter with me for 3 years and will be my interpreter again next year as freshman with me.

Deborah

Through AG Bell, we met MANY deaf people who were oral--it wasn't just hearing parents and deaf children--we met lots of oral deaf adults. Watching deaf people dance to music at the family dance--talking to deaf adults who are HAPPY to be able to hear and speak--listening to deaf people talk about their lives as oral deaf adults--it was definitely inspirational! For my daughter, people like Heather Whitestone were GREAT role models. Also, at other types of events, we met deaf and hard of hearing people with a variety of communication modes. Perhaps the most motivating was a very sweet deaf woman who had two hearing children. We communicated by writing notes back and forth. Her hearing loss was about like my daughter's--NOT profound, but pretty severe. The main thing she told me was that she WISHED that she had more speech training--she WISHED she had more options--she WISHED she could speak to her hearing children better. This very nice deaf woman told me that she WISHED she had been raised orally and that if she had deaf children, she would definitely send them to an oral school. Yes, she was still proud of ASL, but she knew that her hearing children needed more. We also met people who were hard of hearing--not deaf--who said they can talk on the phone and things like that. We also met people who were late deafened--they spoke fine and said that they are learning ASL but will not stop talking because English is their first language. AND we met a few Deaf couples--all of them had hearing children. One woman out of all of these people we met said things regarding being raised orally but "giving up her voice", using ASL only at home (and her hearing children were speech delayed), etc. As hearing and speaking parents, we naturally were more inclined to listen to the majority of people we met who said that, with hearing aids and some speech therapy, our daughter should be able to speak just fine--and she did! Within the whole entire world of deafness and hearing loss(of all levels), there are many different people with many different beliefs. We mostly came into contact with people--deaf adults--who were oral and were happy about it. There is definitely more than one way to feel when you are deaf or hard of hearing--not everyone thinks and feels the same way. When our daughter was young, we happened to meet people who were happy being oral deaf--not everyone who is raised orally feels as negatively as some seem to feel. Still, the SOCIAL issue is really a completely different thing--being completely in the hearing world with NO deaf friends is not good either. THAT is why oral deaf people need to socialize together as much as ASL only Deaf people--everyone just wants to be around people who are most like themselves.

Deborah

So you are about to begin high school--how exciting! I wish you all the best! My daughter is one year younger than you--she will be in the 8th grade in the fall. Will there be any other deaf students at the high school? That is my daughter's number one concern--deaf girls to be friends with and deaf boys to date! She still can have hearing friends and date hearing boys, but she wants to go to a deaf school so she won't be one of the only deaf students at regular school. We are trying to move to Florida so that she can go to FSDB--she is not happy with the high school here. I hope you are happy where you are--good luck!

coolgirlspyer90

haha thanks. Well i'm currently having a crush on a hearing guy who also might possibly be having a crush on me as I found out by another hearing girl. I grew up with a hearing family and a hearing background. But I socialize with deaf people as much as I can. As your questions about other deaf people at the high school, the answer is no. I am going to be the only deaf student with a CI and a hearing aid at my high school next year. But I know this teacher who teaches ASL at the high school and she is going to be retiring this year and i won't be able to see her next year. With St.Ritas school for the deaf, I wasn't really happy about going there. It didn't really feel right to me. I felt like I should go to hearing school where I think feels better to me. (no offense ) But At least i survive a hearing middle school by me being the only deaf/hard of hearing 14 and a half teenage girl. I hope i'll survive high school AND the marching band as a percussionist.

jillio

Well said. Vygotsky defiantely has it right when it comes to language acquisition. It really is a shame that more parents don't understand the difference between acquisition and directed learning, and the way in which they affect fluency and creative use of language.

jillio

My son attended St. Rita. Its a small world.