The first time I realized I was different from the rest was in junior high. People were finding out I was deaf and I started losing friends and fast. By year 9 I was an outcast and prime target for bullies which happened, and got on a physical level. After that year I was like damn life is nothing but a bitch plain and simple. My grandmother said I said I had a very 'dead' appearence. I wasnt communicating, I went into my own little fantasy world where I would dissappear into nothing. I turned into a freak of sorts. Self-mutilation/destruction. Even developed anorexia. I couldnt figure out what was wrong. I wasnt thin enough, I wasnt beautiful enough, I wasnt good enough.
By year 10 I was begging to be transferred to another school, somewhere that I could start over fresh, someplace where I wasnt the deaf girl anymore.
But then someone had compassion for my pain reached out and helped me to realize I was thin enough I was beautiful enough, I learned that it wasn't me that was the problem - it was them.
Ive come full circle, now oddly enough my bullies are either jobless or in jail, and me, even though I never accomplished my dreams, Im well liked at work or so I believe.
Never let someone tell you, your not good enough. Rise up prove it to them that you can be good enough becuase sometimes being better than the best is simply being good enough.
