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Well, I'm gay.
I'm not sure about what you mean about the signs, but I think it is pretty much the same for hearing gay ppl. If a straight person calls them a faggot, it's like calling black ppl the n word. But within the gay world, a gay calling other gay a faggot, it's viewed as a joke. I know that double standard exists and thats what sucks really.
As for signs, I know some ppl dont like the "G" on chin for gay, so they fingerspell GAY instead. Me, I just sign "G" on chin, it doesn't matter to me. I don't like the sign for "faggot" though, or even this word at all. I think it has a psychological aspect associated with this word, a very negative one.
I hope I am making sense and answering your question somewhat.
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