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Unread 11-03-2009, 10:22 PM   #52 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by TheWriteAlex View Post
Oh, I should discuss the flipside of this. The reason why hearing men don't seem to have a problem with deaf women is because for them, non-visual biological differences are not as much a concern. Men are much more attracted to physicality than women. In fact, deafness is often a desirable trait to men. Some men like to be a "protector" and in extreme cases, this is taken to a controlling degree. I think some hearing men look at a deaf woman and like the idea that they can take care of her, that they can "protect" her and help her with her "disability." Let's face it, too, the hearing person in a relationship is easily able to control the deaf person in many situations, since most of society is auditory based. But then we all know the stories about Deaf women dating hearing men who take the man to the Deaf community, and the man gets pissed off because suddenly he's the one in the position of meekness. I can't help but feel that most of the time when a hearing man wants to date a deaf woman, even if he's not aware of it himself, he's reacting to his biological need to control and protect. I don't like that I feel like that, but I do.

I don't know. Maybe I've got it all wrong... :shrug:

I think you make some good points, especially about control and protection. This topic came up in conversation once and someone expressed that in a Deaf-Hearing relationship, the "hearie" doesn't always have the best signing skills. And that some Deaf men don't have as much patience if communication is not smooth, where Deaf women are more willing to teach the language to assist communication. I have never experienced said relationship so I can't comment from first hand experience but what do you think about this theory?
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